Sydney couple needs egg donor

[Yoli]

It’s all about you!
Are you between 25 and 35 years of age.
Are you generous, kind and understanding, willing to assist us by donating an egg?
If so, contact Yoli - yoli@hotkey.net.au
We will happily pay all medical, travel and incidental costs.
.................................................. ............................................

Why do we want children and what would we be able to provide children?

My husband and I are very devoted to each other, and our relationship and we want to express that love and devotion by having children. We feel that we would be able to provide a loving, safe, secure and nurturing environment for children.

If my husband and I had met when we were younger we probably would have had a mob of kids by now. In fact I often dreams of having twins or triplets even though they don’t run in the family.

We both love the energy children bring to a household - the noise, the laughter, the chaos, the tears - Children see the world as a place of learning and discovery - everything is new. The opportunity to have a child and travel with that child on a journey of discovery to adulthood and beyond is a gift that we’d like to have.

I think we’d make great parents. My husband is a scientist and a yoga teacher so he is able to combine the analytical mind with the spiritual creative mind. He is soooo calm – He’ll make a great dad who can calmly give advice and instruction.

I’ve worked in the youth sector and now in education so I have a bit of an understanding of children and young people.

We are both also very fit and active people so we feel that we can keep up with children. Every time I play in the garden with my niece and nephew – I tire them out. I like to get them out into the backyard to play on the grass rather than let them sit in front of the TV. We’ll be throwing the Frisbee or playing chasing and my nephew who is 5 years old will turn to me and say – I think I’ll go inside now – it amazes me that I can tire him out, rather than the other way around. J

I also think we’d be thoughtful and well considered parents. We wouldn’t say “because I told you so” but try and explain cause and effect, action and consequences. We do this now with our niece and nephew – I always explain what the consequences would be of an action and they respond very well to that. I’ve never had any terrible tantrums from my niece or nephew not even when they were going through “the terrible twos” but when ever they were with me I’d always explain things to them and I set parameters.

I guess I’d try and teach my children to be “boss of self” that is to be true to themselves to understand themselves and how they fit into the world.

[Celestine]

Yoli - Just wanted to wish you all the best in a your search for a donor.
:sunshine:

[Yoli]

thanks baby4me - i need a bit of luck and support :)

[Roxy]

Yoli - maybe if you tell us more about yourself, you might pique someone's interest in donating to you!

You are limited to only 1000 words per post here :laughing: , and there are lots of lovely new ladies looking at these threads who have a new interest in donating after watching the Making Babies SBS doco this week, but they need to know more about you to help them make the decision to contact you.

Look forward to getting to know you better....

[Yoli]

Hi Roxy

I guess the first thing you've probably figured out is that I don't really like talking about myself. What can I say? I meet the man of my dreams late in life. I was around 38. One of my good friends bought him to my door. So yes, ladies, your knight in shining armor can come to your door and you don't necessarily have to go out looking for him - though if you do wait he may come around a little late.

I have had two miscarriages. The last one was really sad because I did go to RPA emergency to tell them something was really wrong and they sent me home - they said I was old and had a weak bladder and that was all (I don’t have a weak bladder). I spent two days in pain at home in bed and when I went back to RPA for my 12 week check the baby was dead. My first look at it was so sad no heart beat nothing just this dead fetus. Then they said go home and your body will reject it. They kept telling me I was old and I should just go home. By this time I was distraught and annoyed and I knew that this type of advice could lead to infections. So I insisted on a D&C. They miscalculated theatre time and instead of going in at 4.00pm I didn’t get into theatre until 11.00pm. By the time I went to theatre I was have convulsions – that is my whole body was shaking. They kept asking me if I was cold and I kept saying no I’m not cold. They were scared to put me under but were also scared that if they gave me an epidural that it might not work as there was a possibility of this. So they put me under by making me take big breaths of the gas and blocking my windpipe. By the time I woke up it was 12.00pm and it was my birthday. I have never woken up from an operation feeling so weak. They came and inserted a drip. I was tired but I felt that if I feel asleep at that moment I would never wake up again. Finally what ever was in the drip made me feel like I had a little more energy and went to Sleep. I went home the next day my birthday and baked. I don’t know why – I’ve never been into baking. But that day I baked, cakes and cookies. I do like cooking.

I used to always celebrate birthdays they were milestones that I enjoyed with my friends. I never really had a concept of old or too old, not until I started seeing doctors about fertility issues. I had no idea that I'd have problem having children - my grandmother had 12 children 6 boys ad 6 girls - the last one in her 50s. I thought when it was my turn it would just happen. But it didn't. I haven't celebrated my birthday for a few years but this year I think I might :) May be I'm starting to feel young again :)

I've had a lot of tests done. My specialist says that my best chance of having a baby is to find a donor. This is a hard thing to ask and you always go to family and friends first. My family and friends would gladly help me but they are too old. I am lucky to be surrounded by really good friends :)

How is that for a start.

[Roxy]

That's a great start!!

Wow - what a path you have been on! I can understand you not wanting to celebrate your birthday - can't say that I'd be much into celebrating my birthday either when it held such sad memories.

[Celestine]

Yoli - I do hope you find your donor angel here. Your story has bought a tear to my eye. I know exactly what you mean about Prince Charming coming to your door very late in life....mine did as well.

Once again, wishing you all the best. Miracles do happen & they happen everyday on bubhub.

:flowerz:

[elwoodgal]

Hi Yoli
Stopped by to give you a 'bump'.
Are you still looking for an ED?
It has been over a month since you last posted so I am curious to how you are going in your journey to be a Mum.

elwoodgal

[Yoli]

Hi Elwoodgal

I'm still here :) We went to Counselling last week. It was interesting and difficult. The most difficult thing was listening to my partner state how he had these all encompassing desire to breed, to pass on his DNA, to be a dad and how it was almost screaming in his head, especially since none of his siblings want nor have children. - I had to keep looking up towards the ceiling so the tears run fall down.

Any way, It's my birthday soon :) so let's hope there's good news around the corner and not just for me but for every one.

Yoli

[elwoodgal]

Oh Yoli, the counselling session sounds as though it was very difficult. Poor you. :hugs:
I hope this year's birthday is one you can look forward to.
elwoodgal

[pisces00]

:) have sent you a private message yoli

[Zoe2]

Just sending you some good luck, :wizard:
Big Hugs, Zoe.

[Yoli]

Thanks Zoe2

I need a bit of good luck. It's my birthday on Monday and i had been hopping I would have had a donor by now and on my way :(

I've got a job interview first thing Monday morning - so I'll be studying for the interview all weekend :)

Yoli

[elwoodgal]

Happy birthday for Monday, Yoli. happybirthday
Good luck for your Interview also.
Keep strong & hopefully an ED will contact you soon.:thumbsup:
elwoodgal

[Yoli]

Hi All

Thank you. I had a good birthday and it's nice to have people wish me a happy birthday and so I want to share a gift with you. Before all this stuff happened I used write. I'd had a few things published too. When all this started happening I lost my writer's voice for a while but it appears to be coming back slowly. That is I got the urge to write something recently and I thought I'd share it with you. It's a poem I wrote for my niece who will be 3 years old in June. Enjoy :)


Sienna
(for my niece)

She wears my father's smile
My blue eyes look back at me through her.

Carefully he watches
with a wrinkled face wink he says "she's one of ours!"

Ours. Our side, our DNA
Our tenacious attitude to life.

No! I do it! I do it!

Left shoe on right
Right shoe on left

Stilt walker steps and

FLOP

You show me!

Wriggling mass impatient for escape
Nappied bottom struts down the hall.

Yoli © Feb 2008

[elwoodgal]

:)That was lovely Yoli. :yelclap:
You write beautifully.:yes:
elwoodgal

[goodegg]

Great poem, Yoli. Can totally relate to it with my own nieces.:yes:

Good luck with your search, and happy birthday for yesterday too!:flowerz:

take care,:wave:

goodegg

[Yoli]

Hi All

Today I'm feeling really sad. I feel Like I'm on a river of sorrow that is made on a bed of grief. I feel so helpless because and dependent on a stranger's good will. And I feel my husbands grief and need to have a child in every cell in my body. On days like today i feel that if I could just disappear, just cease to exist, my husband would be able to find someone that can give him what he wants - a child. I know that this isn't the sort of thinking that will help me. I know I have to keep positive. I know that I have to have positive thoughts to create positive outcomes. So I'm trying very hard to snap myself out of this.

What do you do when you are feeling really down? How do you get through it?

Has any one got any suggests on what else I can do? I've placed and advert in Sydney's child and in bub hub and I'm not sure what else I can do?

Yoli

[rachwantsababy]

Yoli - my heart is aching with you honey, reading your last post I can totally relate to how you are feeling. It was only last weekend I cried to my DH and said if this cycle doesnt work maybe I am better off leaving so he can find someone to make his dream come true.

What you have to remind yourself of though, is that you got married to be together, you are together because you love each other so dearly. When I get really down and hurt like you are right now, I take a good look at what i DO have. A husband that loves me so much, house, a supportive family and friends that are there for me. PLUS I have all the lovely girls on here.

I know listening to a readio station in SA just the other week they organised a dream wedding for a girl who was 27 and dying of terminal cancer, leaving behind her 2 little girls and a devoted husband. It made me stop and think, if I was given bad news, do I want to look and wonder why I spent so much of my life upset. We cannot change somethings in our lives, but that doesnt mean we have to give up hope, stay strong and positive that donor will come to you, have faith it will all work out, but dont ever forget to live and enjoy what is around you while waiting hun.

i hope that makes sense, if all else fails, try retail therapy! LOL just kiddin, when I got really down after my last cycle a nice 1 hour massage at a spa did wonders to revive me too.

I wish you all the very best and will be praying for that angel for you too. :hugs:

[elwoodgal]

Hi Yoli :hugs: bugger those bad days.
Have you joined AED? I recommend it, it is a terrific site.
Also consider an ad in a local/regional newspaper as I have heard of some women finding their ED this way.
Apart from that keep active, post regularly, that is it from me. :ecomcity:
elwoodgal

[Yoli]

thank you every one. It's nice to know that i'm not going mad and that other people have felt the same way. Eldwood gal - what is AED - I dont' think I've heard of it. I'll also try our local newspapers. thanks again

Yoli

[elwoodgal]

Hi Yoli
AED is Aussie Egg Donors & it is a similar forum to bubhub. I am a member of both & I think they are both fab.
elwoodgal

[Yoli]

Hi All

I'll be away over easter - camping in the Pine Forest in Armidale - I won't be online.

So this is just a note to wish you all a happy and safe holiday period.
Hope you all have a great break :sunshine:

Yoli

[Yoli]

Hi Everyone

I was feeling really brave and made up a few flyers stating that I needed and egg donor etc. I thought I'd ask the local pre-schools in my area if they would put them up on their notice boards.

So I made up the flyer and sat on it for a while.

Today I finally got the courage to go into the preschool down the road. I rang the doorbell and asked the person who answered the door. She said I'd have to talk to someone else who was in the staff room. She took me to the staff room. There two ladies were in the room, one was sitting down eating. The one sitting didn't get up - she just asked me what I wanted and I told her and she said that she didn't think they could do that.

I just wanted to know - if anyone else has tried to put posters up at pre-schools? And does anyone know what the rules are for notice board flyers at pre-schools?

Yoli

[Zoe2]

Yoli,
I posted you at AED, but I will just repeat something......

You copy heaps of adds that you stick together on an a4 sheet, cut 'em up and everywhere you go you stick up 1/2 a dozen on various boards[ take bottle of drawing pins in bag], and run away real quick.....
got my drift ?? :thumbsup:.

For those on Bubhub, Zoe, X

[Yoli]

Hi Zoe2

Thank you - I got your message on AED. I like your suggestion especially the bit about running away really fast :goodvibes:

Yoli

[Zoe2]

:wave: Glad to see you have a sense of humour!!!

I had absolutely no luck spending lots of $$$$$ advertising. Better to do other stuff, like being here and AED, you meet heaps of nice girls too!!
[And pinning up heaps of adds, you never know!].
That's how I got my donor, 9 years ago :valentine:.

Zoe.

[taylorsmummy]

Oh hun, I just read your story and that's awful what has happened to you! :hugs: The other night me and my fiance were talking about how sad it is that some people with a good heart and a stable home can't have children and others who abuse and physically hurt their children can. The world is so unfair :mad: I wish I could give the gift of children to all that deserve it, but I don't know how well the idea would go down my fiance. I hope you find someone soon :hugs:

[Yoli]

Thank you for your support Taylors mum :) - I know somewhere out there is a donor for me - it's just a matter of connecting.

Yoli :)

[Zoe2]

See, I told you the girls are nice, you meet such interesting people on these forums and you never know when one may read your story!
Anyway don't give up, you've only just started! :sunshine:.

Zoe.

[Yoli]

thanks Zoe

I've put my advert up - fingers crossed - someone reads it :)

[Yoli]

thanks Zoe

My fingers and toes are crossed and I'm keeping hopeful

Yoli

[Zoe2]

That's the way, :wave:.

You're learning!!! Keep asking or just talking, because you never know who's listening, :angel:.

Good thoughts to you, :flowerz:. And I like these tickers!!!

Zoe.

[tummymummy30]

Hi Yoli :wave:
Hope you get some good news soon. :yes:
Kelly x
:flowerz:

[Yoli]

Hi Kelly

Thank You - Hoping you also find a donor soon - keeping our fingers and toes crossed :fingerscrossed:

[Yoli]

Hi all

I've been spending a bit of my time on AED site - it's a really good site - but will still keep an eye on this site :)

[Yoli]

Hi everyone

does anyone know how young a donor can be? I thought that 25 was the minimum age. The reason I'm asking is that I've been getting inquiries from people who a much younger and I'm a bit concerned.:confused:

[Zoe2]

Min age can be 21, depends on clinic.
You can have younger, has to go thru heaps of clinic stuffing around, but is do-able.!!

Zoe.

[Cassiecat]

Dear Yolli
Have just read all your posts and lovely poems,and i really hope that good news is around the corner for you..
Most people fellow sufferers describe IVF as a rollercoaster journey ,so I am hoping you are due to enter the wonderful bit in that journey.
My fingers really crossed for you
All the best wishes and luck
cath:smiliedance:

[Yoli]

Thank You Cassie Cat

I've had a few nibbles - I had one women contact me and set up a meeting at a cafe and then she didn't turn up. I've posted up the story on Aussie Egg Donors website as a cautionary tale so others won't end up like me waiting for an hour for someone that was never going to turn up.

Keeping positive though :goodvibes:

[Whispers]

Thank You Cassie Cat

I've had a few nibbles - I had one women contact me and set up a meeting at a cafe and then she didn't turn up. I've posted up the story on Aussie Egg Donors website as a cautionary tale so others won't end up like me waiting for an hour for someone that was never going to turn up.

Keeping positive though :goodvibes:
:eek: you poor thing. How anyone could be so low to do that to you hope all will go well:fingerscrossed:

[Yoli]

mamabear86

Thank you for your kind words. I'm keeping hopeful :)

[Zoe2]

Yes, I've had some nasty surprises too.:banghead:
Some people are not too nice!!

Keep positive :hugs:.

Zoe.

[Yoli]

Hi everyone

I’ve been feeling a “bit under the weather” and I didn't realise it at the time but I was heading straight into a really bad period and I mean really bad - It build up over a few days to explode into cramps, the runs, vomiting. I thought I was miscarrying again. I was out for the count. I just lay in bed.

DH being practical - said this isn't normal you should see someone - so I went to the doctor (found a great female doctor- she's brillant) any way - I went to see the doctor you examined me and sent me for an ultrasound.

When the doctor got the results she told me they found a polyp not a big one but one with its own blood supply. She said it's probably got a stem but you can't tell that in ultrasounds. She said that as my body would try to expel it during a period it would giving miscarry like pain. She said it would be best to get it out as with its own blood supply it may get bigger and with a stem it can float around and lodge itself somewhere where it can cause a lot of pain. Also it makes it very difficult to get pregnant with a polyp. She also said that I should get a specialist with experience to get it out because it has its own blood supply if they don't get it out a certain way I could loose a lot of blood during surgery and I wouldn't know about it but it would leave me wiped out for 3 months. So off course I asked her if she could recommend someone - so I go and see the specialist on Thursday 18 June. :)

I guess I'm lucky they found this out now

[Zoe2]

Get that nasty thing seen to, it's good it came up before you had problems with donor eggs.
I feel for you, keep the chin up, :yes:.

Zoe. X