confused

[pynk]

hi, my relationship has broken down recently and i have just found out i am pregnant. I already have 5 (one with autism)children from my marriage which ended last year.

My mum doesnt want me to have this baby (will disown me)but a part of me wants it. It will have repercussion on my other kids also. I am not sure what i should do. Some friends say its great some say get rid of it.

Any input is appreciated

thanks

[V8]

Well only you can make the decision unfortunately. And it is definately not an easy one. Try not to listen too much to people's negativity about it, you need to listen to what you want and how it will affect yourself and your family.

I have had a termination before and would never ever want to go through it again, but can understand why others would. I suggest some serious soul-searching and some counselling. :hugs:

I was so desperate i basically had a list of pro's and con's basically the con's outweighed the pro's so i terminated.

I wish you all the best in your decision. :hugs:

[Freya]

This must be hard for you.

I was 15 when I fell pregnant out of home and had been with my partner for 2 and a half years, we not long after went through a complete realtionship breakdown and it was hell being so young and being betrayed by the person I had given everypart of myself too. I wasn't able and could never go through with an abortion because no matter how hard it would be I know I could get through. I have been through hell with having my son but wouldn't change it for a thing. In my mind, a woman will never regret having a child but a woman may regret having an abortion... I would rather live with as less regrets as possible. Every baby is a blessing in my eyes and you never know this baby could change both yours and your families lives for the better.

Please seek counselling, you are in my thoughts.

[EsSjAy]

:hugs: to you hun....

What an extremely difficult time for you...
A decision like this is IMO the hardest one to make as a woman...
What it comes down to is you and your feelings...
Everyone will have an opinion...
I understand that having 5 children with one having special needs... what an amazing acievement with so much hardship already... x x
I cant begin to imagine what you are feeling right now but i agree with V8... Weighing up the pro's and con's and looking at the long term may help with your decision....

All the best, i hope that everything works out for you and you come to a desision that is right for you and your family...

x x:hugs:x x

[pynk]

i had decided i wanted to keep it but it looks like i have no choice but to abort. All my friends are saying its hard enough to look after the ones i have and i cant afford it and i need to study, whats going to happen to my other kids if i have complications etc etc so everyone is going to abandon me if i keep it. I think this is the hardest decision i have made in my life.

[Freya]

i had decided i wanted to keep it but it looks like i have no choice but to abort. All my friends are saying its hard enough to look after the ones i have and i cant afford it and i need to study, whats going to happen to my other kids if i have complications etc etc so everyone is going to abandon me if i keep it. I think this is the hardest decision i have made in my life.

If everyone in your life is going to 'abandon' you as you say, are they people you want in your life regardless of whether you keep your child or not?

I know I would not want people in my life who can abandon me over something like that.

[KatiesMum]

Good luck - whatever you decide.

Sending lots of :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: your way.

[bigglet]

That's terrible that you don't have people around to support you.. :hugs:

Have you thought of adoption? Only because there are a lot of couples out there who would love to provide a loving home for a child out there.

Can you seek some form of counselling?

If you wanted to keep the child you should be able to regardless of what your friends and family say - and their lack of support when you need them most is terrible :mad:

It is your decision not theirs! They should support you regardless

[EsSjAy]

i had decided i wanted to keep it but it looks like i have no choice but to abort. All my friends are saying its hard enough to look after the ones i have and i cant afford it and i need to study, whats going to happen to my other kids if i have complications etc etc so everyone is going to abandon me if i keep it. I think this is the hardest decision i have made in my life.

I WHOLEHEARTEDLY agree with oneblessing...

Please Please don't make a decision based on other peoples reactions or feelings....
This is not fair, they shouldn't being forcing their opinions on you let alone making their 'stance' on what they will do if you decide to continue with the pregnancy....
Friendships don't have conditions.... It's not about them, it's about you hun....

Look after yourself hun x x All the best x x

[jaxcoop]

You do have a choice. These "friends sound like they are toxic and you would be better off without them

Your friends and family should be supporting you 100%. Im so sorry you are feeling like this.

You have to make the right decision for yourself. Not for friends or family.

I really think you should go to some form of counselling. That way you can talk about how you are feeling and what options you have available.

Please don't rush in and make a decision based on other people as i would be concerned you would regret it in the future. You have to make the decision for yourself.

Good luck and all the best for the future:hugs::hugs:

[4B2L]

I wouldn't be calling your friends, 'friends" if you know what I mean. They seem anything but friends. If they were true friends they would be supporting any decision you make.

Goodluck and please take the time to make the decision that is right for you, not a decision that is a reflection of a bunch of people emotionally blackmailing you at your weakest hour.

:hugs: :hugs:

[rowiechb]

:hugs:Big hugs for you!:hugs:

I think you need to do what is right for YOU and YOUR family (your 5 kids) and NO ONE else, if others will not support your decision, they are not the kind of people you need in your life anyway.

:hugs:Take care and we are here, what ever you choose:hugs:

[mummyto281]

What kind of friends are they???
Do what your heart tells you. I know 6 kids will be hard and you will need lots of support.
What ever you do you will need to do ASAP.
Lets just say i have been a similar situation and if message me i'm happy to talk about it in private.

Good luck....