Babies sleeping away overnight.

[Smurfette]

hi, Olivia is 6 months and I have absolutely no intention of letting her sleep overnight anywhere. I can't even imagine when I will let her, I just can't bear the thought of her not being here. My friend was here tonight and said I should start thinking about it.
I'm sure one day it will happen, but I really can't imagine it happening in the near ( or far - she says in a tiny voice )future . Right now, it fills my heart will dread just thinking about it.
Am I being wussy? How old was everyone elses bubs when they slept away overnight?

[tyler's mum]

tyler stays at my mum & dad ever sat nite,,, i hate it but in a way i need it,,, it's good to have a break but i miss her so much and i'm ringing like every hour...lol... i would'nt let her stay after nite anywhere else untill she is older

[cwsmum]

My DS was about 3weeks old when he stayed at his nana and pops overnight. Only coz we had movie tickets we had to use and DH was working 6days a week so we could only go at night...no one to babysit on his day off :rolleyes: Also, we decided it was too cold to wake him up to take him home late at night. He is almost 3 now and loves staying at either set of grandparents houses, but it doesn't happen often.
DD is almost 16weeks now and still hasn't stayed overnight anywhere.

Why does your friend say you should start thinkong about it? Was she meaning that you should plan to leave your bub somewhere overnight sometime soon? Or just that you should start preparing yourself for the day she might want to stay somewhere overnight?

[Smurfette]

tyler stays at my mum & dad ever sat nite,,, i hate it but in a way i need it,,, it's good to have a break but i miss her so much and i'm ringing like every hour...lol... i would'nt let her stay after nite anywhere else untill she is older
Maybe if my Mum was around ( she is in Adelaide) I would have let her stay with her, and as much as Mil loves Olivia and would do anything for us, I just not ready to let her look after her all night. Is that wrong? Should I be letting go? I don't want to and certainly don't feel ready to.:crying:

[tyler's mum]

if you dont want her to sleep over at anyones house,,, thats your choice there is nothing wrong with it,,, liv is still a bub no need for her to stay anywhere else but home if thats the way you want it,,, tyler was 6weeks when she started staying at mum & dad,,, the frist 3 weeks they stayed at my house cause i was real sore,,,, do what best suited you and liv:thumbsup:

[Smurfette]

[Why does your friend say you should start thinkong about it? Was she meaning that you should plan to leave your bub somewhere overnight sometime soon? Or just that you should start preparing yourself for the day she might want to stay somewhere overnight?[/QUOTE]
I hear how other people have left there babies and sometimes feel pressured because I haven't. I know I shouldn't, but I also don't want to isolate Olivia and make it more difficult for her later on. Just wanted to know it isn't a bad thing.

[Smurfette]

if you dont want her to sleep over at anyones house,,, thats your choice there is nothing wrong with it,,, liv is still a bub no need for her to stay anywhere else but home if thats the way you want it,,, tyler was 6weeks when she started staying at mum & dad,,, the frist 3 weeks they stayed at my house cause i was real sore,,,, do what best suited you and liv:thumbsup:

Thanks Tam, oh hows that house work coming along?;)

[reAllytee]

Well bubs is 1yr old now & he still hasnt stayed overnite anywhere & he hasnt even been babysat for more than an hour :eek:
We refuse for MIL to be near him that long & my mum is cool but as she is disabled she is limited plus i dont like depending on others silly i know.
Im a wuss too dont worry hehehe :o
I just cant bear to leave him but i think im now making it worse by prolonging it IYKWIM so i plan to do it soon .... As soon as i work up the courage :o
Should have started sooner .....

[tyler's mum]

yeah its still coming...lol...

[Kirstlea]

We left Paige with her godmother for a night when she was 6 weeks old. We had a cabaret that we had been invited to which offers the only opportunity in Cairns to dress up in formal besides the amateurs. We both so much wanted to take Paige but children are not allowed at these functions.

With any luck your friend meant, too prepare for when it might happen. Alot of children will not settle anywhere else and maybe that is why she said this.

We are lucky it doesn't matter where we are Paige will go to sleep in any bed as long as no other kids around to distract her:)

Take all the advise you can from all walks of life and use only what you are comfortable with. It does not make you any lesser of a parent.

I have 2 mums in my group who did not want to leave their children over night anywhere either so they didn't and haven't until very recently. They are both over 2 years old and both well balanced happy children along with their mums.

Hope this helps

Kirsten:thumbsup:

[Rockett]

I don't think you are being wussy at all.MY DD is one year old and she has never stayed overnight anywhere,nor has anyone babysat her,(apart from DH )and I also have no intention of doing either for a fair while yet.
I've also had people say you should let her stay with so and so,but it's my choice and if anyone has a problem with it-tough!
You have to do whatever is right for you and your bub.:)

[Smurfette]

Well bubs is 1yr old now & he still hasnt stayed overnite anywhere & he hasnt even been babysat for more than an hour :eek:
We refuse for MIL to be near him that long & my mum is cool but as she is disabled she is limited plus i dont like depending on others silly i know.
Im a wuss too dont worry hehehe :o
I just cant bear to leave him but i think im now making it worse by prolonging it IYKWIM so i plan to do it soon .... As soon as i work up the courage :o
Should have started sooner .....

I know how you feel. I guess if you do it from an early age its easier, but their just soooooo cute. I think when everyone kept saying to me when she was born " enjoy such and such, their not babies for long", I took it literally. Trying to get in as much time with her a possible before she "grows up".:laughing:

[reAllytee]

Thats exactly how i feel !
Thats why i chose to be a SAHM !!!!
I dont want to miss anything even if i have days i would give him away for free LOL :rolleyes:
I just hate the idea of missing anything because im so proud of him especially atm with him cruising around the house & pointing at things & trying to say the word !
If i missed that i think i would die :o

[tyler's mum]

i dont wanna miss anythinf as well im not goin back to work till tyler is at school,,, i hate shareing her but the break is good

[Smurfette]

Not sure if anyone read my thread on Sunday " I'm so sad",But I freaked out when hubby took Liv to the beach without me. They were gone for nearly 4 hrs, longest time I have spent away from her yet.:crying:

[reAllytee]

Tam & of course you need a break !
You are doing the job for 2 parents so you deserve that !
I would be the same in that way also thats why lately ive realised i need to do it because my partner hasnt been able to help out as much as he could it means im doing everything & its hard work !
Hats off to you :D

[reAllytee]

Not sure if anyone read my thread on Sunday " I'm so sad",But I freaked out when hubby took Liv to the beach without me. They were gone for nearly 4 hrs, longest time I have spent away from her yet.:crying:


Ohhh missed that one !
Yeah think i wouldve freaked also :o

[tyler's mum]

thanks ally:D

[Smurfette]

Tam & of course you need a break !
You are doing the job for 2 parents so you deserve that !
I would be the same in that way also thats why lately ive realised i need to do it because my partner hasnt been able to help out as much as he could it means im doing everything & its hard work !
Hats off to you :D
Tam, I had a feeling you were single, but of course didn't want to ask. I pretty much do everything by myself during the week because Dale is gone before Liv is up and she is in bed by the time he gets home. What a massive job to do it 24/7. I do admit that I love weekends when he is home so I can have a mini break.
Here is a big :hugs: for you, just cause you deserve it.

[Mamaduke]

We refuse for MIL to be near him that long....
No...really...I wonder why that would be?!!!:rolleyes:

Jesse sleeps at my mum and dad's every Sunday night (and has done since he was about 6mths)...I remember my mum asking ever so politely, "so, do you think Jesse might be able to sleep the night at our place soon?"...and to be honest, I'd never not wanted him to, I just didn't really think of it...the first few times I was calling every couple of hours and I'd be there Monday mornings to pick him up...
then I'd start picking him up at lunchtime, after lunch, late afternoon, dinnertime (couldn't go home then...had to stay for dinner!)...
On the other hand Lucas has only stayed away once & that was with Jesse...and that was at the "b.s.artist formerly known as the 'smother in law'"...she said he was fine...but then she's a liar!:mad:

[tyler's mum]

im always up for a hug,,, i never thought i would be a single mum and still wonder if i'm doin the right thing,,, tyler is such a happy bub that i must be doin something right,,,, it's hard but i know much better then having him in our life

[reAllytee]

No...really...I wonder why that would be?!!!:rolleyes:

Jesse sleeps at my mum and dad's every Sunday night (and has done since he was about 6mths)...I remember my mum asking ever so politely, "so, do you think Jesse might be able to sleep the night at our place soon?"...and to be honest, I'd never not wanted him to, I just didn't really think of it...the first few times I was calling every couple of hours and I'd be there Monday mornings to pick him up...
then I'd start picking him up at lunchtime, after lunch, late afternoon, dinnertime (couldn't go home then...had to stay for dinner!)...
On the other hand Lucas has only stayed away once & that was with Jesse...and that was at the "b.s.artist formerly known as the 'smother in law'"...she said he was fine...but then she's a liar!:mad:

Hahahha maybe cause she is so great i worry Harry will want to stay :laughing:
*falls off chair*
Yeah i think once i do it that once or twice i will get over my fear of it all. Im hoping i will anyways as i worry when i do have another baby he wont stay with anyone else.
I would never trust a word my MIL says either ! :mad:

[Smurfette]

im always up for a hug,,, i never thought i would be a single mum and still wonder if i'm doin the right thing,,, tyler is such a happy bub that i must be doin something right,,,, it's hard but i know much better then having him in our life
I don't think being a single Mum is what most people plan in life, but if it has happened, then it was supposed to happen. Tyler l'm sure is a happy content little girl, well she certainly looks like it. Well done.

Allyoo and Mamaduke - I'm gathering there are issues with your Mil's??:detective:

[Mamaduke]

Allyoo and Mamaduke - I'm gathering there are issues with your Mil's??:detective:
I don't know about Ally...but I looooove my 'smother in law'....as much as I'd love to have a pilonidal sinus...again:eek: !!!!

[reAllytee]

I agree with what you say liviamorris it may not be what you dream or plan for but then i think their is a greater plan we all have made for us anyways so we dont get much say IYKWIM :D
Tyler is here because she is meant to be whether it be because she is meant for great things like curing cancer or for something smaller it doesnt matter really just that she is an angel that we are blessed to have walk this earth with us.

Yeah we have small probs with our MIL's :rolleyes: :laughing:
Lets just say they arent the nicest people you could ever meet.
Sad really when all you want is for your families to get along etc.

[tyler's mum]

we say that she really wanted to be here,,, she was not planned i was on the pill and we used a comdon:eek: ,,, so she really is a gift,,, and the best gift i think i will ever get

[reAllytee]

For sure :hugs:

[Manxie]

Hi Liviamorris and other mummies

I'm hearing you
My friend was here tonight and said I should start thinking about it.
Why is there so much pressure to leave our bubs with other people? I have a sneaking suspicion that it is to make them feel better if they have to/choose to leave their baby with someone else:rolleyes:

My SIL tried to get me to leave DD with her when she was three weeks there was no way I was doing that I just wasnt ready.

My dd is 7 months. She spends lots of one on one time with DH but hasnt been left with anyone else. My family are all overseas so it might be different if they were close by. It has taken me until now to feel comfortable with the idea of leaving bubs with someone else.

We had an issue with the smother over this last week. We wanted to go and see a relative in a play, I would have left DD with one of the few trusted outlaws but all of the times clashed with feeds and she wont take a bottle. We told smother this but she phoned up the other day and started questioning me about whether I have ever left DD with anyone, how hard I am going to find it when I do :ecomcity: Grrr. Previously she has also told me how hard I am going to find it when she starts school! Anyway DD ended up comming to the show and was as good as gold:yelclap:

Anyone sorry this is turning into a MIL rant:rolleyes: but I just want to say that I am determined not to feel pressure to leave DD with anyone. I dont think I am causing her any long term damage. I can never remember being babysat as a child and I have always been very independant. IMO people are pressuring you for their own reasons - maybe because they want to have bubs to themselves or as I said before to ease their own guilt.

[onabreak]

My daughter is 16mths old tomorrow and she has stayed over my parents heaps of times since she was just under a year old. My parents love having her and I love having the time to do things with hubby and get time to relax.

My daughter loves staying with them aswell, she has so much fun that she winges when she has to go home, it is so cute though, she is a real poppies girl when it comes to my dad. My parents usually have her one week end a month or if something comes up urgently they will be around to pick her up in a heart beat. It is their first time being grandparents and they just adore the role.

My parents would be heart broken if I didn't let her stay there, but I think it is great that my daughter gets to spend time with them.

[ETsMum]

Well bubs is 1yr old now & he still hasnt stayed overnite anywhere & he hasnt even been babysat for more than an hour :

Same here. Except our bub is only 6 and a bit months. :)

[Desertress]

My DS1 just turned 3 last week and has only just stayed at his grandparents place over night the other night..... He has been at peoples house for a full day but i have always picked him up in the after noon.....the only reason that he stayed then nigh this time is was because when we went to pick him up he was already asleep and i didnt see the sence in waking him up.

[Oscar's mum]

I couldn't let DS sleep over anywhere not at least before he was 10! I would go crazy! I already go crazy if I am away for over 4 hours!:eek:

[meme]

mydd2 is nearly 3 and has never stayed anywhere else overnite.
i have only been away from her the nite after her sista was born and then again when dd3 was in hospital and i had to stay there with her, and i bawled my eyes out when she had to go home after visiting:crying: (is that pathetic?). but she just stayed at home with family.
i am planning to go away for a weekend this year so the time has come......

however sometimes i still feel funny when my 9yr old goes on sleepovers!

[Smurfette]

Thanks everyone. I really feel reassured that I am doing the right thing and that there should be no pressure, which there isn't at the moment, but will know it is to come. I think the main culprit will be my husband. Will have to start letting out subtle hints now that it wont be happening so all hell doesnt break loose when he suggests it.
Thanks again everyone.:)

[BlessedWithBlue]

My ods was 2 when he first stayed overnight at df's mum's for the night, now he stays there at least once a fortnight on a Saturday night and comes home on Sunday.Yds hasn't stayed away from home over night yet and he's 14 months.

[O&GMUM]

I havent left the bunnies overnight and dont intend on doing so for a few years!! Is that bad?
But do you know what, Im so sick of people saying to me "oh you should leave them more"(I work one day a week, I leave them then, with mum). Or "Oh you should stop BF now they are getting too old."
Im not listening to anyone but me from now on!!

[IAdoreYou]

UMMM .

I won't be letting Brooke stay anywhere for YEARS without Mummy or Daddy!! Noway-PO though.

[Crazy Monkey]

I dont think your a wuss.... I think it is totally normal to feel the way you do.. I dont have any intentions of letting DS spend the night away from me at the moment and I cant really see a time when I will... I'm sure there will be a time where we will feel it is OK and will be happy to do so... Just do what you feel is right for you and your family and dont worry about what others have to say...

My DS is nearly 10 months old and I hate it when he is not with me.. At the moment, he is with his dad and my IL's and I am crawling the walls... I hate it... I know this is pretty stupid but I hate DS being away from me, even though he has given me such a hard time today and I know I need the break... Sorry for my rant, dont want to hijack the thread...