Dummy curse?

[lil monkey]

My littlie doesn't sleep during the day - :( she has around 3 x 20 min naps and then her night time pattern seems to be have a feed around 630 ish and wake up 5-6 hours later for a feed and then wake up 2 hours afterwards around 445am and grumble and cry and wriggle while her eyes are shut. Very annoying and distracting and I have to get up every 20 minutes to put her dummy back in her mouth. so after getting up numerous times during the night and then being up all day without a chance for a nap myself as I have to keep putting the dummy back in once she realises she has lost it I am a mental and physical wreck!! :(

Does anyone else have the same problems and have any advice on how they have dealt with it or are dealing with it??

Lu 28

Tayla 02/02/05

[jamb]

Hi Lu,

this could be my Jack to a t!!! Jacks 8 weeks old and was first given a dummy by midwife while i was in hospital still. I was against dummies but he seems to be a very sucky baby and it works to both calm him and gives me a break.

Jack has two 20 minute sleeps during the day, also sleeps from about 6/7pm for 5/6 hours and grunts and groans from the 4/5am feed- very very loud. (our living arrangements at the moment mean he is at the other end of our large room) He settles during the day with dummy and doesnt always need it overnight.

Sometimes the dummy keeps grunts and groans to a minimum but if it pops out then he wants it back. I didnt want to get into the in and out of bed routine so now we pop him inbetween us and he falls straight asleep for another 2 hours :) .

I've been doing this for over a week and it hasnt affected him settling by himself. Not sure how you feel on bedsharing, but I find as I have no break during the day, the little extra sleep gives me more energy to put in to him during the day.

Good luck and love to chat anytime to see how things progress

Amy

[lil monkey]

Thanks for your reply - good to know we aren't the only ones out there! I do stick her in the bed sometimes just to get the extra hour or two and I seem to be able to stick the dummy back in her mouth in my sleep now - sorta like a reflex action!

We are off to baby boot camp this week for 4 days to see if trained staff can sort out her settling and lack of sleep problems so fingers crossed that works otherwise I will have to adapt to minimal and interrupted sleep for the next several months!!

Babies are funny creatures........... never thought parenting would be so tough but then she smiles and laughs and it's all worth while. ;)

[onabreak]

I lived with a flatmate who's baby was exactly the same, would cry in the cot every time the dummy fell out and she would have to go in there and put it back in over and over.

I used to watch with amazement and could not beleive this would rule her life while he depended on the dummy so much. I said to myself when I have a baby I am not going to use one.

I now have a 5.5mth old daughter. She was born 10 weeks early. The nurses would try a put a dummy in her mouth but she would just spit it out. Up until now she has never needed a dummy, I tried but she would just gag on them.

I have to say not giving her a dummy is the best thing. I put her to bed, she will suck on her fist for 5 minutes and she is sound asleep. I never have to go back in there except to check on her.

Sorry to here that you are both having trouble. Just thought I would let you know that my baby is the opposite. I hope I am not rubbing it in. I have seen both sides.

[TwoBlue]

Hi Lu and Amy

I had the same problem with my son Samuel, in and out of his room all night replacing the dummy until he learned to put it back in himself !
This doesnt happen straight away but all of a sudden they work out how to find it and put it back in themselves so now it is not so much of a problem, and i always make sure there is a few dummies in his cot so he can find one easily !

Hope your problems settle soon and you can all enjoy a full nights sleep.

Cheers
Tracey

[jamb]

hi tracey,

thanks for that! i look forward to that- especially as winter is coming :)

amy

[KathandTom]

I was having a similar problem with my bub. He couldn't keep the dummy in so we were for ever nursing/patting him with one hand on the dummy to keep it from flying out of his mouth while he was going to sleep. Anyway somone suggested trying a different shaped and larger dummy and it works a treat. My little one is 13 weeks old and I use a 6month+ cherry shaped dummy.

Have you tried putting her back on the boob instead of putting the dummy back in when she wakes at 4:45. When ever my bub wakes I just stick him on the boob and 9 times out of 10 I'm back in bed asleep 15 mins later.

ps - Toms sleeping patterns are very similar to your bubs (although he usually has 3 x 1 hour sleeps in the day) I think your bub sounds very normal and is doing well to do a 5-6 hour sleep from 6pm. Tom didn't start doing that until he was about 10-11 weeks and sometimes now he is still up 2 and 3 times during the night for a feed.

Good luck

[xkwzit]

Hi All
We tried dummies with both our girls. With DD1, she would wake everytime the dummy came out. I had read "Baby Whisperer" where babies should drop their dummies once they are asleep and aren't supposed to wake up. DD1 waking all the time just made a dummy too much like hard work - so we did away with it when she was about 3 months old.

DD2 is the opposite - loves her dummy to go to sleep. Works a treat to settle her and she'll drop it once asleep and not wake up for it (mostly). We've never had to hold it in for her - she's always done a great job herself. While she was a bit younger I might have had to get up once or twice a night to replace it - but haven't had to do that for several months now (unless she is sick or teething).

So they are really all very individual and you just have to keep trying different things until something works for you all. Best of luck (and no-one knows your baby as well as you do :) ).

Cheers

[becus]

ive been on this site quite a few times now and every time it gives me info that i really could use.
my 15wk old daughter is exactly the same, she catnaps during the day then after her bath and the booby bout 6ish she is asleep for up to 6hrs (sometimes!!) and then after that feed shes fast asleep until the followng feed, so maybe feeds twice during night.
the mornings her dad leaves for work at 4am so if she wakes early i pop her in bed with me and we get a bit more sleep - plus its cold!
but her cot is in our room and i dont know if i should leave it in there or not?? its convenient because when she wakes she doesnt cry, she just moans and groans. i could use a baby monitor but is it wrong to leave the cot in the parents room?
cheers.

[xkwzit]

Hi Becus
Having the cot on your room is not "wrong" - but it may or maynot be working for you.

Personally we've always had our girls in their own room, just across the hall. That's because they can be so noisy sleeping (moans and groans, coughs and sneezes) that I'm not sure I would get any sleep if they were in our room. But I guess on these cold nights its nice not to have to go too far to settle baby.

If your littly's nocturnal noises (or just their presence) doesn't bother you or hubby - then there's nothing worng about it. I guess eventually you'll find that you all no longer need/want a roomy and you'll move baby out (I haven't heard of too many 18 year olds still sleeping in Mum and Dad's room :D ).

Just do what is right for you all