Divorce, Religion, and Circumcision

[MotherNurture]

New article:


Divorce, Religion, and Circumcision:
What A Conflict Tells Us About Parental Rights
By SHERRY F. COLB
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Wednesday, Nov. 28, 2007
Years ago, in Oregon, James and Lia Boldt divorced, and James became the custodial parent of their son. In 2004, James converted to Judaism. Now, James wishes to have a ritual circumcision performed upon his 12-year-old boy, but Lia, who is Russian Orthodox, is strongly opposed to his doing so. Earlier this month, the Oregon Supreme Court heard arguments on the question whether Lia should be able to keep James from proceeding with the circumcision of their son.

Though it is, in some respects, very unusual, this case nonetheless highlights a somewhat hidden and more widespread assumption embedded in our laws - that if a couple's mainstream religion requires them to inflict harm upon their child, then the law will not interfere with that prerogative.

http://writ.news.findlaw.com/colb/20071128.html

I found this interesting.

Jen

[the_queen]

Hmmm :detective: Does the 12 year old get a say in this, I wonder????

[lukaelmo]

Lol, yeah, tell the 12 year old that they are going to come at his willy with a scapel... then let him decide :laughing:!

[the_queen]

I'm also wondering - I wonder if the father was ritually circumcised in order to convert?


Although - most men in his age bracket are probably 'genitally modified' anyway, sadly :(

[becca74]

If the boy isnt going through the conversion process with his father, he's not permitted to be circumcised (According to Halachah ie Jewish Law). He is nearing Bar Mitzvah age, where traditionally a boy makes religious decisions for himself, so the article needs to be more specific about details, as it is not a black and white decision.

Conversion to Judaism is not like other 'drive-through' take away food religions where you order 'saved from sin' with fries on the side. It is like studying for a drivers license over a really extended period of time, and if you don't pass the tests, you dont get converted. It is extremely complicated. If the boy is converting, he would have travelled down a rather intense path.

From other people I've known, within the Orthodox Jewish halachic context, the boy would have to follow the religion of his mother till he was about 18 (According to Judaism, spirituality is passed through the mother). I've known people under-18 wanting to convert, who have been turned away because the Rabbis won't teach them till they are legally separate to their non-Jewish parents.

In my circumstances, my mother couldnt prove (at that stage) about our great-grandmother, so she had to be treated as a convert when she wanted to go religious. (Recently, after a death in the family, we have recovered a Ketubah, so it cleared the 'legalities' up, so to speak).

Before we knew, my mother couldnt force anything upon me and my 3 brothers. Two of my brothers 'converted' along side her, but they had experienced medical circumcision (one at age 4, the other at about age 6) so I guess the decision wasnt complicated for them. At that stage, my other brother (not circ'd) and I decided to not follow her into orthodoxy. At age 16, my other brother did want to become religious, so had a Bris under general, at his request.

So I know it is impossible to force a child into conversion, as whilst my family were still treated as converts, even though we had family which, though could not be proven to be at the time, to be Jewish, the Beis Din (Jewish Court) told my mother that she couldnt force us into it.

I would imagine that the Beis Din would be more likely to side with mother in the instance of this story, and agree that the boy should not be circumcised until he is of an age to decide for himself. A Beis Din will also, 99% of the time, grant custody of a child to the mother, for the reasons I gave above. One would really have to look into WHY the mother does not have custody also.

Unless reformed/conservative Jews practice differently, I will reiterate, an Jewish Orthodox Beis Din would support the boys mother and insist that the boy NOT be circumcised.

There is waaaaayyyy more to this story than meets the eye.

If you want clarification on this halacha, you can go to askmoses.com

[NeilR]

very good post Becca, very clear and informative.