Clingy baby! HELP!

[delirium]

My 5 m.o DS is only just getting over severe reflux in the last few weeks. Because he was in such terrible pain for so long, we constantly picked him up, which I think is pretty understandable. The problem is now, we can't put him down, and I mean ever. Unless I am carrying him around all day and night, he'll winge and cry all the time. I do a lot of slinging, but the issue is, I'm becoming resentful. After 4 months of 12 hour a day screaming, I'm already worn to the bone, both physically and mentally from the reflux. when the pain improved for him, I actually thought things would get better, but they haven't.

It's gotten to the point I can't even go to the toilet in peace, or do anything for myself. All our family work during the day (when I need the babysitting) and because he's so full on no one can handle him for more than an hour or two.

Now he's waking ALL night too. :crying::hair::banghead: He's not in pain, I'll feed him and change him, and he still won't go down. Basically he wants to be held and played with. I'm feeling depressed and stressed out of my mind. The only respite I had all those months of reflux was when we slept at night. Now I'm not even getting that. Don't get me wrong, I love him to bits, but like I said, I'm totally frazzled and I NEED a break. DH can only handle him for about an hour and then gives him back :rolleyes: I'm to the point I'm ready to just take off for a few days...

Anyone with any pearls of wisdom? What do I do???

[lukaelmo]

Oh you poor thing :(.

My 8 month old, Chuckie was like this, and to a certain extent, still is... if he was up, he had to be held, as soon as he was put down the screaming started, the second he hit the floor... drove me mad, and really took away a lot of the pleasure out of having a lovely little newborn.

Like you, I held Chuckie all the time, as he used to be in terrible pain from constipation. I finally discovered that dairy was upsetting him and eliminated it from my diet. He got a tiny bit better, but was so used to being held that he just demanded it non stop.

As I mentioned, he is 8 months old now, and has improved a lot. I now know a few ways to keep him happy without holding him.

Your bubba is most likely a bit young for this, but Chuckie is happy if he is sitting up, in his high chair with something to eat. He also likes to see different things, so I move him around, he likes to sit outside and look at the trees, he also likes to watch our dog... he'll also sit up on the floor by himself at playgroup, because there are a lot of things going on there for him to watch.

So it's a question of keeping him distracted really.

That probably doesn't help you much right now, but maybe it helps you to know that things will get better. Do you go to playgroup or anything like that? Most people love a new bubba, so perhaps you could offer other people to have a hold while you enjoy a cup of tea, or just a chat to someone else... and with your DH not wanting to take him for very long, could you maybe say you have to go out for an hour and then take two or three? Sorry, that's bad, I know, but I used to do that, when I knew I couldn't face Chuckie and his demands just at the time...

Umm and how about being in a pram? Or even the car? You could go for a walk or a drive? I know they aren't complete breaks, but I guess you have to deal with the reality of the situation, that you don't have anyone to take over, the best you can.

Anyway, good luck... and if I think of anything else to help I'll post again.

[delirium]

Thanks so much for your reply. I haven't used my pram since having DS (I'm a baby wearing girl ;)) but I think I might get it out of the shed and clean it up! I'm feeling at wits end atm so I'm willing to try anything. I also plan to get my aunt to watch him for an hour today - it's only an hour but it's something I guess.

It's a relief to know it gets better. I have a friend who's boy is a tot and still clingy (not anywhere near as clingy as DS though) and I wonder, my goodness, is this going to go on for another 2 years??

We don't go to playgroup, partly because he's such a handful we don't go anywhere. Even when others pick him up, he looks around for me, whining. I was told boys are way more clingy and high maintence than girls - I didn't believe it until I had DS. :rolleyes: