View Full Version : Have i left it to long
Melissa1983
03-03-2006, 20:33
Hi.
My girls are 3 and 2, and won't go to sleep on there own or in there beds. They will go to sleep if i lay them infront of the TV with a dvd on.. But i only have one TV now and i don't want them to keep doing it. Plus i am trying to get them off the bottle.
At daycare they will go to sleep on there own and without a bottle but not for me!
Have i lefted the control crying to late to start?
Its never too late to start a new routine.
Just decide on your course of action and BE CONSISTENT.
Good luck :)
KatherineIV
03-03-2006, 20:39
I agree with Nicole.. it's consistency...
You are probably in for a few rough nights... but keep calm and remember there is light at the end of the tunnel!!
Controlled crying might not be what you are looking for but it is not too late to teach your girls a new routine for bedtime. I agree with Nicole - come up with a plan (ours involves milk, brushed teeth, stories and bed with some music on) then explain it to them, then stick to it. Be firm and consistent and it will happen.
Melissa1983
03-03-2006, 20:50
With the bottle, do you think just throw them out and thats it??
Why do you want to get rid of the bottles?
Depending on what your reasons are - maybe move them over to a cup with a spout or straw as an interim measure.
My suggestion would be take it step by step - let them have their bottle, but not in bed, then they go to bed. Once they are used to going to sleep in their own bed then I would take the bottle out of the routine - too much all at once might create more dramas than you need.
kiwibird27
05-03-2006, 09:44
I would take the quikiest easier route to get them to sleep in there own beds - expect sleep deprivation and tears for a couple of weeks though,
If u don't want bottle throw them out now - just tell them they're big girls now and big girls don't have bottles, because they sleep no problem at daycare they are just having u on because they can, time to get tough, make sure there's a quiet routine before bedtime, and all is calm, relaxed and only give them water or milk before bed, no sugar!!! Make sure they go to the toilet (if toilet trained)
When it's bedtime tell them it's bedtime now, your going to have a lovely sleep in your own beds and stay there for the night (they are old enough to understand) Put them to bed, kisses and cuddles, maybe a story (up to you) goodnight "Mummy wants you to stay in bed and go to sleep now!!!" Everytime they get up put them back, no cute cuddles and kisses, just say sternly it's bedtime now, you have to stay in bed (be really firm) don't give in to I'm thirsty or I,m hungry, use your own judgement on I need to go to the toilet,
It could take all night but keep at it, do the same routine EVERY night without fail, If u give in once, it will set it back another couple of weeks, remember u are in charge not your girls - they are obviously really clever, so good luck - Watch SUPER NANNY on channel 9, she's really good, I agree with most of what she says!!!!!!!!!
One more thing - how long do they sleep at daycare???? This could be a major part of the problem - too much sleep during the day!!!!!!
moonblossom
05-03-2006, 09:52
What I found REALLY helped was a Lavalamp in the bedroom. It sends of a peaceful glow, and gives them something to watch which is so soothing while they go off to sleep. Its always put out of reach of course.
This really worked wonders for me :)
I think they are only little still. If they need their bottle for comfort then who does it hurt? But having said that, your the mummy, so you do what you think is right for them. Whatever routine you change to, expect it to be difficult... At the moment their routine is lying in front of the tv with you, so that's what they're used to. I agree with the other gals, consistency is the key.
Good luck!
Melissa1983
05-03-2006, 12:12
I think they are only little still. If they need their bottle for comfort then who does it hurt? But having said that, your the mummy, so you do what you think is right for them. Whatever routine you change to, expect it to be difficult... At the moment their routine is lying in front of the tv with you, so that's what they're used to. I agree with the other gals, consistency is the key.
Good luck!
With the bottle, i don't mind them having it, but they want it to go to bed, and they spill it in their beds and hair. And also they wake up through the night for it. Both of my girls wake up 2 to 3 times a night still for a bottle..
kiwibird27
05-03-2006, 12:59
I think they're old enough to do without bottles during the night????? - please don't take offense but maybe your giving into them a little bit to much and they're having u on!!!!
Once again sorry if I offend - it's just my opinion!!!!
~Chick79~
05-03-2006, 13:17
Mel I agree with the others.... you need to be consistant with what you decide to do. You can't give into them as they will learn (as they already have) that you will cave and give them what they want....
Maybe ask their room leader at daycare what they do when they put them down for their sleep???
The one thing you got to try not to do is give in just to get some sleep! Maybe implement your new routine on a Thursday night say, that way you don't have to get up for work over the weekend and hopefully come the monday the girls will be a little easier to cope with....
Maybe a new routine could be, both of the girls have Sipper Style cups (this will aid ingetting rid of the bottle) of milk approx half hour before their bedtime (have a set time) let them drink it while they watch a Dora DVD or you read them a story etc, then when it is bedtime, get them to brush their teeth and go to their beds and maybe have a musical star (like the one Ryan has) that will play music for 10mins as well as provide some dull light til they go to sleep... If they wake during the night, just give them a cuddle (reassurance) and lay them back down, maybe even turn the star on again...
It is going to be hard but you need to do it.....
My 2 year old DS still wakes about 2-3 times for a bottle. Im lucky that Dp gets up and makes them :thumbsup:
I havent thought about taking the bottle off him yet, i guess as he gets older he might decide not to use it anymore :confused: As my DD was the same, she weaned herself off it at around 2 and a half - 3.
Melissa1983
05-03-2006, 20:31
I think they're old enough to do without bottles during the night????? - please don't take offense but maybe your giving into them a little bit to much and they're having u on!!!!
Once again sorry if I offend - it's just my opinion!!!!
No offence taken! I know i give into them to much! and it needs to stop. I need to show them i am Mum not them!
Mummyof2. Those photos of your girls are pretty cute, can see where your problem lies... Sorry I know I'm not helping...
Just wondering - are they in separate rooms or together?
I had the same probs with my 2 - they would only go to sleep on the couch with the tv, but I got tough (so hard to do, and so hard to stick to as well) and made them go to their beds. But we put them in together for a while, and that seemed to work. They knew they weren't missing out on anything cos the other one was in bed too. And it helped cos it was shared story time and no shouting over who has first story etc etc. They were only together for about 2 months and are now pretty much ok with going to sleep in their own rooms.
I wouldn't worry about the bedtime bottle. They will grow out of it eventually. The night time ones are a pain though (for you I mean, to have to get up!). Maybe put some water on the side of their beds and hope that they will get that in the night instead?? (wishful thinking I know:D ).
And as someone else said - check it out with daycare and maybe ask them to restrict their sleep to an hour only?? I know I'd pick up DD sometimes and she'd been asleep at daycare for 2 1/2 hours, and would still be up at 10pm!!!:eek:
Lizzy_80
11-03-2006, 20:59
Hey, I'm new to this whole posting thing so here goes. It's deffinantly not too late. My Nephew (who I was living with at the time) was 18mths when we started with him and it was amazing. At first it was hard and his mum was in tears outside the door but we kept her strong. I know he was younger then your two but he had also never slept apart from his mum so being put into his own room was horrifying to him. But It didn't take weeks It took three nights of a regular rutine and the 4th night he had dinner, bath, brushed teeth and said goodnight to everyone else and then was taken to bed by mum read a story and went to sleep. We couldn't believe it. It may take a few extra nights but I don't think weeks and we got out info on it and how to do it sent to us by (I think) positive Parenting. I have an Idea about the Bottles thing. Maybe don't try too much at once. Get them going to bed by them selves first. That would be my first objective and then once they are settled for a while then worry about the bottles.
I hope I have helped and not been too direct. I have a habbit of being too direct. :)
Melissa1983
11-03-2006, 21:09
Just wondering - are they in separate rooms or together?
At the moment i have them in the same room, but they ain't normally. Its the house i am in only has two a/c. One bedroom and the Main. So i have Abby on the Floor in her room.
But for an update: I have been able to get them to sleep on there own :smiliedance: I went and brought story time cds, and they love it. Abby has been lying there with her bottle, drinks it and then goes to sleep without it, and Mikayla does it sometimes, and she has also been sleeping all night :yelclap: Abby still comes into me around 2am, and just wants cuddles and then goes back to sleep in my bed.
Thank you all for your advise. You guys are great like normal.
Baby Girl
11-03-2006, 23:21
Hip Hip hooray!!
I have staggered bedtimes for my girls as they share a room. DD2 goes to bed half an hour earlier than DD1 so she is asleep before DD1 goes to bed - if I put them in bed at the same time I can still hear laughter at midnight :eek:
I remember you asking about weaning Mikayla off her bottle at night. We gave DD1's bottles to Santa at christmas and he gave her 2 new mugs/cups to have milk in before bed (lots of explaining) - worked a treat. I was thinking if you still wanted to get her off her bottle at bedtime, maybe she could give her bottle to the easter bunny and he might leave her a little easter egg in a brand new cup/mug - might be worth asking her.
Melissa1983
12-03-2006, 20:36
I remember you asking about weaning Mikayla off her bottle at night. We gave DD1's bottles to Santa at christmas and he gave her 2 new mugs/cups to have milk in before bed (lots of explaining) - worked a treat. I was thinking if you still wanted to get her off her bottle at bedtime, maybe she could give her bottle to the easter bunny and he might leave her a little easter egg in a brand new cup/mug - might be worth asking her.
That is a really good idea... I will try that.. Thanks for the idea... I might even do it with Abby as well
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