View Full Version : "Are you STILL bf'ing?" -How to respond?
MilkOnTap
16-11-2007, 09:59
At Christmas time I will be visiting my family and the in-laws and I will be breastfeeding a then 7 month old baby. I know that my family will be asking questions and I'm not sure about the in-laws (MIL bf'd til 13mths).
When I get the question "Are you still bf'ing" or "When are you going to wean" how is the best way to answer it? :detective:
I dont want to be snappy or narky; but I want to politely and assertively tell them that I dont plan on stopping any time soon! :thumbsup:
forbetoel
16-11-2007, 10:01
I would just say that you have been one of the lucky ones in finding breast feeding really easy, and that it makes life so much easier not having to worry about cleaning bottles etc, etc, and besides it is really good for her. :)
borntobemummy
16-11-2007, 10:04
yep, I sure am:yes: ;)
misskittyfantastico
16-11-2007, 10:04
It is such an annoying question! ATM I'm getting "So are you planning to BF?" from every man and their dog!
I just used to answer "Are you still BFing?" with " I most certainly am!:) " and "When are you going to wean?" with "To be honest, weaning hasn't even crossed our mind!:) "......I found the grin at the end to be most effective:p
hayleysmummy
16-11-2007, 10:04
I'm still bf at 13 months most people dont say anything but when they do I just say when dd is ready but hopefully before 3 (well thats what I'm hoping for )LOL
When they ask if you are still bf just say "I sure am its free why not "
But really nobody has a right to question how long you bf for
DS2 is 15 mths and when i get asked the 'when are going to wean' question, i just say 'when he is ready', that keeps them queit :D
Q : Are you still breastfeeding?
A :Of course!
Q : Isn't it time to wean yet?
A : Why?
I make people work for it - I feel I don't have to justify my BF to anyone. If they have a problem, I make them say it, and then answer their concerns if I feel so inclined.
Acting as if that was the stupidest question with a very obvious answer they could have asked is a great start I think. :D
borntobemummy
16-11-2007, 10:33
people are surprised that DS hasn't started solids yet nor has he had any formula becasue he's a bit of a chubba:p but that makes me proud to say, yep 100% breastfed, it must be good for him!
luckymama
16-11-2007, 10:37
DS2 is 15 mths and when i get asked the 'when are going to wean' question, i just say 'when he is ready', that keeps them queit :D
This is what i say :yes:
Mum&bubs
16-11-2007, 10:51
Just say 'Yep I am!' and if they start asking questions then just ask what's the big deal, he is only 7 months old! Just a wittle baby :D
WeloveHarriet
16-11-2007, 11:01
Isn't it funny how some people are? My MIL never breastfed past 1mth and was a little funny when we had DD about our plans to B/F her as long as possible. Now she is quite proud to tell people that we B/F DD for 8mths (would have been longer but were TTC) and that we plan on B/F DS for at least 12mths - depending on when we plan to TTC the next munchkin.
7 months of breastfeeding and they're going to ask those questions?! :eek:
I only ever answer with "Yep", when asked if I'm still breastfeeding. If they want to know more then they can ask. I do it because dd2 and myself love it, not because of anyone else.:)
When ppl ask when I am weaning DD, I just say "when she wants to, it's up to her'. that seems to work.
Ana Gram
16-11-2007, 12:32
You could have some fun and say "No, he just likes playing with my boobs" :p
ButterflyMama
16-11-2007, 12:34
I'd say something like..
"Are you STILL asking?"
"Why do you care?"
"Because my boobies belong to me and I am in charge of who gets to suck them and for how long!" - no, just kidding. ;) Well maybe if you're game enough! :p
~Emmylou~
16-11-2007, 12:34
If I'm asked when I'm going to wean (which has just started happening more lately) I just say "when he wants to". No one has continued the topic after that. I know most people around me think I should have stopped by now but I couldn't care less :o
RedPanda
16-11-2007, 12:38
That's pretty rough to be asked that at seven months! They're barely on solids at that point! Maybe you could say something like that.
Hollywood
16-11-2007, 12:38
I tell people that DS seems to really enjoy it and I am happy to do it, so I don't see any point in stopping at the moment. I've never had any negative comments and my family/friends are very supportive so I'm lucky in that regard.
This is what i say :yes:
You're getting asked already!!? :(
Mamaduke
16-11-2007, 12:46
"Are you still bf'ing"
If child is attached at the time of question...
"Oh f***, how did he get there?"
or
"No, this is the latest accessory, a breastinator, haven't you got one?"
"When are you going to wean"
"When he can order his own Maccas at the drive though, then I think we'll be done."
Just mess with their minds...that's was Christmas with family is all about. :p
UmmInayah
16-11-2007, 12:54
ROFL mamaduke!! :laughing:
If child is attached at the time of question...
"Oh f***, how did he get there?"
or
"No, this is the latest accessory, a breastinator, haven't you got one?"
"When he can order his own Maccas at the drive though, then I think we'll be done."
Just mess with their minds...that's was Christmas with family is all about. :p
:laughing: :laughing:
I never remember stuff like that when I need to! A shirt with that first comment would be hilarious :laughing:
I will probably have the same questions/comments come christmas time with the extended family but now i have some ideas on how to react and what to say!!
the_queen
16-11-2007, 23:14
I say "yeah!!" as if to say "of course, you bloody idiot" :D and I look at them a bit quizzically as if to say "I don't understand why you'd ask that".
dragonflyblu
17-11-2007, 04:14
I have answered that i cant be bothered with the complications of bottles and all those other baby things that need to be steralised. That seems to put a positive slant on it without sounding defensive.
luckymama
17-11-2007, 06:48
You're getting asked already!!? :(
:rolleyes: :yes: :yes:
"Yes"
When will you wean him
"Before high school."
ETA: As most are saying, you really do have to just have to answer like there's nothing wrong because there IS nothing wrong.
And when they ask "why" (as I have been) simple answer is "why not." and if they suggest bottles, you say "why" :p
I remember being asked the same thing when my daughter was about the same age. I responded with
If I was bottle feeding would you be asking me when I was going to stop the bottle?
Luckily my brother in law who had asked me thought that was a great come back and completely understood where I was coming from.
I like the idea od the previos poster who said to make them work for it, ask them why, make them explain to you why you should.
I agree if it is working, you both love it, it is free, no cleaning up, why would you stop??
nemosmum
17-11-2007, 08:12
aww Ally I got asked this yesterday
"oh shes got a tooth now, when are you going to wean???"
"um not until shes at least two and then it will be up to her:D we both LOVE it!"
insert shocked jaw dropping faces here hahahahahaha
then its the
"BUT why?"
this from someone feeding her 10mth old brightly coloured juice from a bottle....
I felt peeved
I felt like saying why is it so acceptable for you to sit there feeding your bub sugar filled juices and not one mum makes the eye popping face
BUT when I say I want to bf past 8mths its like I just grew another boob out of my ear:laughing:
:hair:
Ally~ just smile really wide and say joyfully
"Yup Im still bfing, Jedd loves it, its so easy and conveiniant and the best bit is its FREE!"
You could have some fun and say "No, he just likes playing with my boobs"
love it!
MD~ You crack me up girl!:laughing:
Q : Are you still breastfeeding?
A :Of course!
Q : Isn't it time to wean yet?
A : Why?
I make people work for it - I feel I don't have to justify my BF to anyone. If they have a problem, I make them say it, and then answer their concerns if I feel so inclined.
Acting as if that was the stupidest question with a very obvious answer they could have asked is a great start I think. :D
I say "yeah!!" as if to say "of course, you bloody idiot" :D and I look at them a bit quizzically as if to say "I don't understand why you'd ask that".
"Yes"
When will you wean him
"Before high school."
ETA: As most are saying, you really do have to just have to answer like there's nothing wrong because there IS nothing wrong.
And when they ask "why" (as I have been) simple answer is "why not." and if they suggest bottles, you say "why" :p
All of the above!!
And then add that according the World Health Organisation, babies should be breastfed till at least 12 months anyway.
All of the above!!
And then add that according the World Health Organisation, babies should be breastfed till at least 12 months anyway.
The WHO recommendation is to 2 years of age :thumbsup:
The WHO recommendation is to 2 years of age :thumbsup:
Well there you go!!!! :thumbsup: :D
MilkOnTap
17-11-2007, 14:52
Great posts! Thanks ladies - you have given me much optimism.
Love your answer Chellegoth... Hubby reckons that I should tell them that I enjoy Jedd playing with my boobs! LMAO!!!
squiglet
17-11-2007, 15:41
Q : Are you still breastfeeding?
A :Of course!
Q : Isn't it time to wean yet?
A : Why?
I make people work for it - I feel I don't have to justify my BF to anyone. If they have a problem, I make them say it, and then answer their concerns if I feel so inclined.
Acting as if that was the stupidest question with a very obvious answer they could have asked is a great start I think. :D
Yep, that's how I work it:D
If child is attached at the time of question...
"Oh f***, how did he get there?"
or
"No, this is the latest accessory, a breastinator, haven't you got one?"
"When he can order his own Maccas at the drive though, then I think we'll be done."
Just mess with their minds...that's was Christmas with family is all about. :p
Pmsl:laughing: If I can remember this witty comeback at the right time I will be using it..
I hate, HATE, this question. I was actully asked it when my dd was 6 months old. I turned to the man that asked why I was still brestfeeding and asked him what she should be eating. He started backpeddling fast.
neostudded
17-11-2007, 16:44
Hubby reckons that I should tell them that I enjoy Jedd playing with my boobs! LMAO!!!
HAHAHA PMSL I think ill use that one if/when I get asked!! :laughing: :laughing:
Great responses!! :thumbsup:
It is so wierd, I NEVER get asked this. And you would think that people would ask with my kids the age they are, rather than a 7 month old baby...that is just mind boggling to be honest.
It really does highlight the very poor perception of breastfeeding that is out there, and what mums have to overcome, simply to do what comes naturally, and is in the best interests of our children. Sheesh.
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.1.9 Copyright © 2012 vBulletin Solutions, Inc. All rights reserved.