'Societies' expectations re breastfeeding [Archive] - Bub Hub Pregnancy & Parenting Forum

MilkOnTap

15-11-2007, 07:52

Yesterday I was out with a friend who is quit notably against extended breastfeeding. Now, when you in hospital breastfeeding is really encouraged - but it seems that the word on the street ( not here on the hub of course) is that formula is 'easier'.

This leads me to my question. Medical conditions aside, what do you think the average 'street' weaning age is? IMO, I think it would be sooner than what the BubHub age is...

:confused:

Seekrit

15-11-2007, 07:55

I think that a lot of people on the 'street' think once they're walking it's time to stop. Which is sad. I know lots of people that have said to me it's gross when they can walk.

The next time it's 'gross' is when they can ask for it :rolleyes:

I reckon it's around 1 year on the streets.

nut

15-11-2007, 08:57

Nobody ever says anything negative to me about BF more than once:D . I have BFd my son to term- he self weaned a few months ago. We were both ready, and it was a good experience to allow him to decide his own weaning. I actually feel proud of myself for that. I BFd him through a pregnancy, through the newborn time with my DD and found tandem feeding really challenging and sometimes awful.
But anyway, I think it is all to do with who you mix with. And I just don't accept any **** from anyone. If someone wants to express their ignorance they can do it elsewhere. I do get shocked though coming here and reading what some people are really thinking LOL. There's quite a, um, rainbow of attitudes out there eh?:laughing: :rolleyes:

nemosmum

15-11-2007, 09:01

I remember when dd was about 4mths I started feeding her and my dad asked me in a shocked voice

"Are you still bfing her?:eek: "

I replied
"um yeah shes 4mths old" and then I gave him a breast milk is liquid gold speech hahahahaha

I think its around the 3mth mark which is really really early imo to wean

at my playgroup thats the average age of bubs being fed......Im the exception and love shocking em with my "oh I plan to keep going till shes at least two :) "

hahahahaha:laughing:

Mum&bubs

15-11-2007, 09:15

I have noticed this too. I think people think around 6 months is the perfect time to wean because they are starting to get more mobile.

That is way too early IMO and I wish there was a way to educate people about it!

Oscar's mum

15-11-2007, 09:28

I tend to agree with the street weaning age being 6 months. Sad really though:(

ziggie

15-11-2007, 09:34

In my circle of mum friends, 12 months was the weaning age.
When our kids were close to 12 months, I remember us all having a cuppa and discussing weaning onto cows milk. Two of us were ff'ers (me and another) and the rest were bf'ers.

~Emmylou~

15-11-2007, 09:58

I think around 12 months.

I never really had comments about our breastfeeding (except for a few related to putting him on formula when he wasn't sleeping :rolleyes: ) until very recently.

In the last couple of months I've been asked quite a few times when I plan to wean.

samken

15-11-2007, 10:11

I've always been a career woman and when I decided to have a child (or two or three I hope) I also new that I was going to BF. The primary reasons are:

1. It is free
2. Your immune system protects the child while you are BF.

With last years cold going around and my belief it is going to be that bad this coming year I'm BF my child until the danger period is over. It doesn't mean I won't start solids but I want her to have the best chance of avoiding any chest infection or high temperatures.

Formula does not give you this, so anyone on the 'street' who wishes to argue or question my decision will be told exactly why.

I don't believe in hard or fast rules I just believe in practical arguments.

CharlisMummy

15-11-2007, 10:11

Unfortunately I'm the only one out of everyone I know with babies at the moment that is breastfeeding.

My close friend and both SIL put their bubs on the bottle within days of giving birth because BF was 'too hard' . I was at a bbq with them on the weekend and they plus others were in a group talking about how much better FF was, its so much easier on them, they dont get stuck with every fed etc etc.

I have never been one to push BF at other people, I don't have a problem with FF, but I just found their attitudes really dissapointing.

So for me, i get the feeling that around 3 months is time to wean.

But we're still going at 11 months and hoping to keep going :thumbsup:

mumofKieran

15-11-2007, 10:14

I think the 'street age' is mostly 6 months, I know so many people who fed for 6 months, or who plan to do this. I think Australia's National Average, however, is even lower, at around 3 months.

But I think for those who are successful at BFing, 6 months is usually the done thing. It's pretty low, isn't it? I don't know where people get the 6 month thing from, because a baby weaned at that age is still heavily dependant on milk of some sort so definitely needs a breastmilk substitute ie formula, which you would think would make it seem more logical just to keep feeding?

I am all for feeding well into the toddler years, but at least I can understand the reasoning behind weaning at 12 months because by then they are having way less milk and more food and can drink cow's milk etc etc. Although in saying that, I do get sick of people telling me that there's no nutritional benefit to BFing after 12m, especially as I am fulltime expressing and so it's actually an effort for me to keep feeding so I don't need those kind of negative remarks!!

WKJ

15-11-2007, 10:51

Regarding which is easier....

I would argue bf is actually easier than formula. (assuming the initial problems of latching, sore nipples etc are overcome)

Formula requires more work... sterilizering bottles, mixing formula, warming up the milk etc and when you go out you have to carry the bottles of water, formula etc.

Whereas bf is always there and ready to go whenever required.. (especially handy for night feeds in winter)

luckymama

15-11-2007, 12:20

Beany

15-11-2007, 12:27

I know that there are stats display that while there is a good chunk of babies being breastfed while at hospital, the rates drop to abismal levels by the time they are 6 months. I'm inclined to believe that people chuck the towel in around the 4-8 week mark. That's when it was the toughest for me, when I kept thinking to myself that at least I'd given him a good start. The idea of carrying on like that for another 10 months sounded ludicrous.

By 14 weeks, it was so easy that the idea of fussing about with bottles and formula sounded ludicrous.

So, yeah, I'd say the most vulnerable point is after the 1st month (when the novelty has worn off) and before the 4th month (when it becomes easy peasy).

Pixie

15-11-2007, 12:29

I think in Australia it's around a year. Here in the UK well you rarely see a baby over 6 months being fed. People are under the impression you must wean, I have had women say to me "oh I didn't realise you could continue, I thought I had to put him on formula at 6 mths" So I am educating people 1 at a time lol

kiwibird27

15-11-2007, 12:32

Either within the first month cause it's too hard or at Around4 - 6 months i reckon.......Most people return to work or start leaving their babies with other people then...and they get sick of being on demand to feed. I would of wanted my husband to help with feeding!!!

Don't know this first hand though cause I tube feed, breast milk nearly killed her!!!

nickalex

15-11-2007, 12:38

I think it's about 6months and if you are being really good 12 months. If you feed after 12 months alot of people seem to wonder why you are continuing. Then yes you do get the comments along the lines of I wouldn't want to feed a walker,talker,shirt lifter etc. Then I have found that if you get past the 18mth mark and decide enough, people wonder why you don't keep on going since you got this far anyway!! lol you can't do anything right.

mellyg

15-11-2007, 12:46

I would take a guess at the street age being between 3 - 6 months..

I have lots of friends who all just go straight for the bottle when their babies are born and it seemed to be around the 6 month mark that they would all start to ask me 'when was I going to stop bfing'.. I would always reply that I will go for as long as we can..

But, and I hope to not be attacked for this, I stopped bfing at 11 months, when I found out I was pregnant with no. 4.. And I know this may sound selfish but I just wanted to have a break before I started with the next one again iykwim..

Cat13

15-11-2007, 14:12

I agree that street age seems to be around 6 months.

On the phone to a work colleague I was telling them that DS had his first teeth and they said 'lucky no more breastfeeding then'. Um, no. He is still BF at 10 months and will be for a while yet :fingerscrossed: . DH does support this but is secretly hoping for self-weaning soon in the hope it improves things in the bedroom!

I've also had calls from interstate friends with younger bubs for advice on weaning bub to formula. I tell them I'd be happy to help if I could but they know as much as I do.

But, and I hope to not be attacked for this, I stopped bfing at 11 months, when I found out I was pregnant with no. 4.. And I know this may sound selfish but I just wanted to have a break before I started with the next one again iykwim..

I am sure no-one would attack you for this! Not selfish at all and completely understandable. While possible, tandem feeding or BF while pregnant is not for everybody and is a decison I'll make if/when I'm ever in that position.

Seekrit

15-11-2007, 17:55

I agree that street age seems to be around 6 months.

On the phone to a work colleague I was telling them that DS had his first teeth and they said 'lucky no more breastfeeding then'.
:laughing: Cobes just cut his 14th chopper :eek:

Toes

15-11-2007, 22:05

I also agree with the 3-6 month mark being pretty standard in society, i used to think the same thing! With DD i set myself a goal of at least 2 weeks because i could only manage 9 days with DS due to some issues that we had and thought i would be really proud of myself if i made it to 1 month. Then my goal was 2 months, then 3 etc until now its at least 6 months (2 weeks to go) and i dont have any intention of stopping because i feel like we're only just starting to really get the hang of it and enjoy it more, its a lot easier now and we've come this far so why stop!
There are six 6 month olds at my DS play group and out of them, there are 2 FF and 4 BF which i think is great, so hopefully things are changing! :thumbsup:

Toes

15-11-2007, 22:07

:eek: 14th tooth! Im not looking forward to that mind you, my opinion about BF might change then!!

Seekrit

15-11-2007, 22:09

Well he doesn't bite :D you don't even feel the teeth :)

(Well, when he's cutting a new one it takes a day or two for him to work out how the best way to drink is... but it's mostly all good) :)

Funkychicken

15-11-2007, 22:11

at least 6 months (2 weeks to go) and i dont have any intention of stopping because i feel like we're only just starting to really get the hang of it and enjoy it more, its a lot easier now and we've come this far so why stop!

You have made a really interesting-and often overlooked in conversations on this topic-point here.
It does take between 3 and 6 months to establish breastfeeding and often it is only after this time that mothers feel like they are getting the hang of it. Many women stop breastfeeding before this time and never truly get to know how wonderful a successful breastfeeding relationship is.

Beany

15-11-2007, 22:13

Yeah, I thought the idea of breastfeeding and teeth was terrifying too but he's bitten me only a couple of times. My reaction was enough for him to realise it simply was not on :eek:

When he's teething, he gets lazy with attachment and so scrapes a little but it's only uncomfortable, not painful.

Just don't feed her when she doesn't want a feed and your nipples will be safe!

sweetsugardumplin'

15-11-2007, 23:02

When I was BFing DS I always felt twelve months was the time one may consider weaning. DS decided that he was too busy to be on the boob at nine months, so really I was not part of the equation. Am about to embark on the journey again with bub due in three weeks.....................hope I am as successful with the BFing as I was with DS and maybe this little one would like to hang around for a little longer, on the boob that is !

forbetoel

15-11-2007, 23:19

I tend to agree with the street weaning age being 6 months. Sad really though:(

Yeah that may be about right...I know after 6 months was when I had the most 'comments' about still feeding. I will add though that I weaned all at around 12months, besides DS4 (a little earlier) but that was due to a serious illness. I weaned at 12 months for lots of reasons, but none of them involved a negative feeling towards feeding longer, if that makes sense??? I loved BF, and miss it a LOT!

maiko

16-11-2007, 14:56

I have 2 friends with children. 1 breastfed until 2 yrs, the other stopped at 6 weeks with both her children.

reAllytee

16-11-2007, 16:17

6mths does seem to be the norm but then i also went to one mothers group when Boof was a newbie & all of those b/f planned to give up by 3mths as that was enough :confused:

I was very suprised by this & a little sad that they thought it was enough.