Settling Solutions

[maddymoo]

I'm having a few problems with settling my nearly eight month old during the day. I think she's reached that age where she's getting separation anxiety. She self settled fairly well when she was younger (cried for about ten mins) BUT now she goes completely nuts when i put her down. I don't like control crying, it is too draining for both of us, I have tried it a few times and found that it winds her up too much and leads to her crying more which leads to me picking her up and falling asleep in my arms and then she only sleeps for half an hour and wakes up cranky. I know that rocking her to sleep can't continue. I really want to sort this out as i'm worried it may start being a problem at night. She has started waking at 4:30am.
My question is- what methods have been successful, that don't involve crying, kicking and screeming!!??(from both of us)
I have read about parents using control comforting. What exactly is that and how do i do it right?
I'd be grateful for any advice.

[Crazy Monkey]

Don't have any advice as I am in the same boat... DS is just over 9 months and since he started teething in January, his sleeping has gone all out of wack... And has also started waking at 3-4am and wont settle until he has a feed :mad:

Will be keeping an eye on the thread for some advice...

[maddymoo]

Success at last! I decided today that i would be determined in getting Madeleine to have her regular sleep. this is what i did today - when it was sleep time I told her what we were doing in a firm and calm voice. I read somewhere that babies do have an idea at this age what we are talking about.
I gave her a little drink of water
We had a cuddle and a soft song out on the deck (only five mins)
I took her into her room, put a dry nappy on her and wrapped her (waist down)this seems to stop her standing up. I had stopped wrapping her when she was 10 weeks old, but i'll do it again till we get the sleep thing happening.
I put her in her cot on her belly and put her glow worm on.
Walked away .... and that was it! She was asleep in five mins! She has done this twice today!
it is a rainy and dark day which helps too. We'll see how we go when it gets sunny again!

[amymay]

Hi i have a 6 month boy who i think is to advanced ofr his age. He is crawling everywhere and pulling himself up with the help of furnature.

I am having so much trouble setting him to see as he is screaming, kicking and is to strong. He is waking 2-4 times a night crying and on his tummy, as he rolls over and moves about a lot.

If anyone can help me with some ideas that would be wonderful. we have had troubles with different types of milk with him, i have him on a goat milk now. He seems to be constpiated with his tummy and it always grumbles at each feed.

Thanks Guys!

[ascheef]

Hi Maddy,

I had the same problems with my now 12mth old and we got the no cry sleep solution by Elizabeth Pantley, she has her own website with some free info www.pantley.com and then because Im such a sucker and crumble when it comes to my bub we went one step further and used a Nanny agency that specialises in no cry sleep solutions and slepe guidance. I found them through the Bubhub Directory, Night Nannies www.nightannies.com.au. I needed a break after having constant sleep disturbances for nearly 12 mths.

Hope this helps.

[Pommy Mummy]

I'm having problems too. My 8month old DS was a fantastic sleeper he would sleep for about 13 hrs a night that was until just before christmas since then he has woken during the night which was fine because I'd just pop in and stick his dummy in or he'd settle himself. Unfortunately for the last 2 weeks he has been waking up at about 4am and wont go to sleep again unless he is in bed having cuddles with me. I am afraid I'm making a rod for my own back. I'm not normally one to pander to cuddling him back to sleep but he had an infection so I didn't like to leave him to cry. Then on Sunday night I thought I'd try to settle him in his cot - well he screamed for ages and it took he and hour and a half to get him back to sleep. Then the next day I thought he didn't seem right so I took to our doc who said he had a sore throat (how guilty did I feel!) Anyway to cut a long story short I don't know what to do, I was going to start over the weekend to be firm and not to bring him into bed with me but I think he is now getting a snotty nose!:confused:

[Tam-I-Am]

I'm in a similar. but bit different boat with DD of 8 months. She would never sleep unless wrapped up, but as she's been getting stronger, has been "escaping" from her wraps, only to wake up 3 or 4 times from 4:00am until first feed after 6am. She started sleeping through at 9 weeks old so this is VERY FRUSTRATING!!!:banghead:

I decided last night to bite the bullet, and stop wrapping her to sleep - initially success - she went straight to sleep at 7pm, only to wake at 2;30am and STAY UP for 2 whole hours!!!! Very distressing, but I did controlled crying (going in after 3, 5, 10, 15 and 20 minutes, then starting again). Only got 4 hours sleep last night - so tired, and she kept kicking the covers off - this was never a prob before.

Any suggestions? Help would be appreciated. Mind you - the darling little snot seems to have gone straight to sleep with no wraps this am too!

[Roxy]

With both children, we stopped wrapping them at about 8-ish weeks. They were unwrapping themselves anyway, and at one stage we had to wait until DD was asleep to warp her, so figured it was pointless.

We tried control cryng, and it just got DS so worked up that he would vomit. DD wasnt as bad, but it certainly didnet suit them.

I read a bit on attachment parenting, co-sleeping etc, and found that whilst I felt that some of those philosophies didnt fit us, some did. Others I adjusted to where they felt right for the children and myself.

I started patting them to sleep, patting them back off when they woke, rocking and singing to them if they were still unsettled, and at times settled them in our bed and then transferred them.

This lasted about 3-4 weeks I guess, and after that I started to "wean" them off being patted by just sitting next to the cot and reading a magazine with just a hand touching them, not patting.

I also found that having the radio playing quietly all night helped too.

After another week, they were back to self settling, and are both now very happy to go to bed and go to sleep. DS only has to see his bottle and teddy and he's trying to climb into his cot!

I guess that time frame seems a long time to a sleep deprived mum...BTDT...but have found that in the long run it worked.

Not sure if this is useful to anyone, just our experiences. It is worth remembering that at around the 8-9 mths age, that babes do go through separation anxiety, and they want to be with you and have you near them. They aren't being difficult on purpose :)

[fee's]

This will sound bad but I am glad to see we aren't the only ones in this boat at the moment. It was useful to hear that bubs get clingy around 8-9mths as this explains my boy's change from a wonderful sleeper for the last 4mths or so to be waking far more frequenlty lately. I had put it down to teething - I am sure they are trying to pop through but perhaps some of it is the seperation anxiety thing.
Am bracing myself to do a couple of nights of "controlled crying",my form of it anyway, based on my pead's advice, and see if that brings the same positive results it did a when he was 6mths old.
Good luck to everyone and heres to some better sleep for all of us and our bubs.:smiliedance:

[Charlie's Mum]

I mentioned this in another post 'cause they have just worked so well for us. We used to wrap Charlie but by 4 weeks he would wake himself up trying to kick it off. We started putting him in sleep suits (mini sleeping bags I guess) and he is just so easy to deal with now. When we put it on him he knows it's time for a sleep and even if he is awake he'll go off to sleep by himself within minutes. When he wakes for night feeds we have no problem resettling him, unlike before when he would kick himself awake over and over.

I also recommend leaving soft music on all night. If we turn it off he's not happy. I guess they are used to hearing noises from their time in our bellies so no use changing it now.

Hope this helps someone.