"That's a handful you have there"

[SweetAngels]

"That's a handful you have there"..... "Looks like they keep you busy"..... "Are they all yours"?

Now I absolutely understand that these Q's/statements are not said or asked in a way that is rude, I mean what else should a shop keeper say when a mother walks in with 3 kids running around her feet, its just a conversation starter right..... or the old guy at the park with his Grandkids, its just an observation, nothing rude about it at all!!!

The thing is, EVERY SINGLE stranger says one of the above things to me (or others similar) I've heard them all at least a million times each lol. I'm starting to get to that point where I want to answer them with a smart a$$ comment :p I really don't want to do that tho cause I know they're not being rude, so it'll be rude of me to be smart. Last night when I heard one, I did the BIGGEST fake smile and bit my tounge..... my Q's is, does it stop? Do they stop asking these things? Do you hear them just as much?

[draught]

I have three kids and get the same lines every time I leave the house, probably because they are all so close in age. I normally say "Yes - aren't I lucky?' The tone in which it is said depends on my day - most of the time I say it as if I truly am lucky - on bad days it sometimes comes out in a more sarcastic and weary tone.....
Normally it stops them dead, either way.
But I think the comments will always come - you just get better at blocking them out.

[Pippi Longstocking]

We heard that quite recently, in a positive way. While we were on holidays, we spent a couple of days in Melbourne. We were doing the tourist thing in the city and stopped to get the kids a drink from a Foodworks shop. The shop keeper dude said "you've got your hands full, that is fantastic! Excellent work guys". He then gave the kids a chocolate each and gave my husband and I a free coffee each as well. He was lovely and it made our day.

[mad3under3]

" yeah they are all mine, you should have tryed it, they would have kept you looking younger! "
blah ha ha

i think it's like the question how are you, you dont really listen to the answer, so it takes people a little bit to click

[punkbaby]

LOL i get that but i get it even morewhen we have dhs son and now indies here its worse! i get sick of it too i know people mean well though.

I cannot stand the sarcastic comments though the intentionally rude ones, i get told i look to young to have 4 kids and its like Yes they Keep me young!!

[forbetoel]

We heard that quite recently, in a positive way. While we were on holidays, we spent a couple of days in Melbourne. We were doing the tourist thing in the city and stopped to get the kids a drink from a Foodworks shop. The shop keeper dude said "you've got your hands full, that is fantastic! Excellent work guys". He then gave the kids a chocolate each and gave my husband and I a free coffee each as well. He was lovely and it made our day.


Mmmm:detective: I wonder if that is the foodworks near me? They are always giving chockies and helping out parents shopping with kids in any way they can.

Anyway, Yes I am always getting those comments too, and they can drive me mad, but I really think that some people are jealous......some can't handle 2, and here I am out shopping, and smiling with 4.

[Pippi Longstocking]

Mmmm:detective: I wonder if that is the foodworks near me? They are always giving chockies and helping out parents shopping with kids in any way they can.


It was right in the city, near the exhibition building. :)

[punkbaby]

Anyway, Yes I am always getting those comments too, and they can drive me mad, but I really think that some people are jealous......some can't handle 2, and here I am out shopping, and smiling with 4.
LOL thats what i think too! although i would have never dreamed of going shopping with 4 ten years ago!

[pookiesossige]

but I really think that some people are jealous......some can't handle 2, and here I am out shopping, and smiling with 4.

Good for you!! That's fantastic. I have the 2 kids that seem like 6 to everyone else when we are out(they're just very spirited, that's all!) but I can't get enough of going places with my kids Valentine They may be energetic, close in age, noisy and tiring at times- but Ronan loves to have his own shopping list (I draw pictures of things for him) and Ariene loves being sung to while in the pram. I put the effort in and make it fun!!

I took the kids for a 1-hour train trip to see a new town and playground for an hour before catching the train back. It was their first time on a train and they were noisy, grubby and had a blast. It was 35 degrees, no airconditioning in our old carriage and they couldn't sit still. Yet Ronan sung to the whole carriage at the top of his lungs and told everyone how much he likes going to the toilet now he's a big boy, LMAO. The older couple across from me made my day when she said my children were beautiful and a credit to me, I could have exploded with happiness when they said that. Sorry, I digressed! :ecomcity: :rolleyes: :D

[MumOf4Monsters]

I don't think these coments will ever stop! I think it's worse when you're "young" or you look "young" and have a tribe of kids.

Everytime i go out i get coments like "are they all yours" "you must have your hands full" "are you going to have anymore".

My dh's grandmother called the other day and she asked me if we will have more babies and i said "yes, i'd love to" and she replied "i don't think you should, you already have 4. Is it because you want another girl?"
(we have 3 boys & 1 girl and everyone assumes that we just want another girl.)
I said "no, i would'nt mind if it was a boy or a girl. I love my kids and am enjoying raising them!

A lady came into my work the other day and we were talking about the changes to a wonams body once she has kids and she said "you wait until you have kids" I said, "i have 4 kids" and she replied "you look much to young to have 4 kids" I said "well we started young" She said "Well you better not have anymore, they'll soon cost you a fortune" So i said " my kids go to a good private school and they have everything they need" and she kept arguing with me saying that they'll want to start sports and music and it's not cheap. She really got under my skin!
I really don't understand why people are so opinionated about things that are none of there business!?
On the other hand, when my husband and i go out for dinner and the kids are all dressed up nicely though, i have noticed that we do get nice coments. I've had elderly people coment on what a lovely family we have. It does make me feel proud! I'd love to have another baby but i can just imagine the remarks that will come when i'm shopping with 5!

[forbetoel]

It was right in the city, near the exhibition building. :)


Nope:o wrong one. Just goes to show how much more personal independent supermarkets are though.

How nice for you to experience that...especially the coffee, that is over the top, excellent service.

[forbetoel]

The older couple across from me made my day when she said my children were beautiful and a credit to me, I could have exploded with happiness when they said that. Sorry, I digressed! :ecomcity: :rolleyes: :D

It is amazing what a simple comment can do for your day. You suddenly feel that, yes, I must be doing
something right.

BTW, I wasn't having a go at people that can't handle 2 kids, it is just that most negative or sarcastic comments I get are from people with only a couple kids, that don't seem to be enjoying it too much.

[StrawberryTheMilkshake]

Id just say "can you imagine the sex it took to get these kids, no wonder you feel compelled to comment, your jealous you poor sweetheart. Has it been a while? :devil6: :devil6: :devil6: :devil6: ". Told you i was pre menstrual.

[melbryan]

Id just say "can you imagine the sex it took to get these kids, no wonder you feel compelled to comment, your jealous you poor sweetheart. Has it been a while? :devil6: :devil6: :devil6: :devil6: ". Told you i was pre menstrual.

That's so funny, wish I could think of something funny to say.

[StrawberryTheMilkshake]

Sometimes i can get the words out quick enough.... other times im so mad i think of it a while later and go back to the person just to say it!

[cwsmum]

Apparently I have my hands full with only 2 kids :laughing: I usually only take one of my kids to the shops with me (I usually go when DS is at daycare), if I happen to mention that I have an older child then I get wierd looks and comments...if it's like this for me now with only 2 kids, what's gonna happen if we have another?
DS is at prep next year, DD will be at daycare one day a week & we are planning to TTC at some point in the next year too...wonder what comments I'll get then??? Maybe I could just let people assume I am preg with my first bub & not tell them otherwise :laughing:

I have been told on quite a few occasions that I have lovely, well behaved children...but it's always older people who say those things. All the young girls who work on shops are the ones who tell me I have my hands full.

[Susan Mac]

When I was growing up, I HATED it when people made similar comments to my mum. (I'm the eldest of seven). It was so embarrassing, as though there was something absurb about my family because we had lots of people. What was worse was when they would then ask my younger sister if she was the eldest. Then even worse, was when my stepdad was with us he would tell people that if they were still trying to work out how it happened, or that they were hoping for triplets next.

Hoping for a brood myself, will start thinking now of witty comments to come back at people who think more than two is crowd control.

[MummyCharmzy]

I get it alllll the time when I take my kids out, especially after school when I've got all 4 I get tonnes of comments and sooo many people stare! Arghhh!! It was worse when I was preg with Sav though, I'd have the older 3 in the triplet pram and my big prggy belly and the comments I'd get were horrid!

Such is life though, I've also had a few LOVELY comments from people saying 'well done' for wanting and having a large family! :D

[Meemo]

Id just say "can you imagine the sex it took to get these kids, no wonder you feel compelled to comment, your jealous you poor sweetheart. Has it been a while? :devil6: :devil6: :devil6: :devil6: ". Told you i was pre menstrual.

:yelclap:
That is Hilarious!!! I love it!! I need to memorize that one!!
I cop those comments ALL THE TIME, I only have 1 DD, but 3 SS's, so when we go for a family outing it can get interesting, since I'm considered to be still quite 'young',:rolleyes: especially for having an 11 yr old SS...
Oh well, keeps em guessing!!!
Polite smile, or even not so polite is all they get from me!

[toni796]

I have never had anyone comment on the size of my family....I guess coming from a small town it's not a big issue......But I have had a couple of people say wow your a baby machine arn't you.......which I just laugh at it.:laughing:

[Schrodingers Cat]

Some of the same old quips can be decidedly tiresome but if you arm yourself with a few juicy come-backs, you will feel very satisfied....or smug, either works fro me :D

Here's a few I have collected from cyberspace:


You have your hands full!

* Yes, happily so!
* Yes, and my heart too.
* Don't say anything, just look puzzled at your hands. (This does obviously not work if you are carrying a baby :-)
* Yes, but I would rather have my hands full than empty!

Are they all yours?

* No, I just went to Rent-a-Brat.
* No, this is not all of them, my oldest is at home with the triplets.
* No, actually two are the mailman's and I am not sure whose is that one.....
* We always say YES, because they are OURS....but actually 3 bio, 1 niece, 2 adopted and 4 foster!! But ours in our eyes!!
* No, a couple of them starting following us a few minutes ago. -- This is especially funny when you look at your kids and realize that one of them really ISN'T yours -- he had just started following you and you didn't notice before...
* No, I picked up a couple extra in the produce aisle.
* Gee, I never heard that question before!
* Yes they are! And then one of the boys will pipe up and mention the 21 yo and the 18 yo if they are not there and of course the baby on the way!
* Of course they're all mine. Do you think I take six (or fill in your number) kids shopping for fun?
* "Legally" first 3 are his & last 3 are ours, I feel in my heart they are all ours.....
* Technically,the oldest 2 are his, the next 2 are mine and the youngest 2 are ours, but we are all just one big happy family (most of the time)LOL, because they all live with us.
* YES!
* Yes, they are all ours. We have been married for 22 years, but only have 11 kids to show for it.
* No..........I have two more at home! (When it fits)
* Well no they are not all " OURS" but in our hearts they are......
* Yes, and they're such good kids!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (the kids love that one!)
* Of course they are..wait..who is that one?Hes not ours.....oh,yeah,#5,I forgot I had him.
* I don't know. How many do you count?
* Yes. But if you have any you don't want, I'll gladly take them, too
* i'm pregnant. I gave this response. Yes, and this one (pointed to my belly) is too.
* No. I've been an avid collector for years and just picked these up in the food court!
* Yes, at least that's what I tell my husband.
* Most of the time I only have my 7 youngest ones with me, so when someone asks this, I say yes and one of the younger ones will say and there are 4 more. Then we wait to see how long it takes to add 7+4. Then you should see the looks we get.
* While I was still in hospital after having our 5th, visiting hours were over and we were all standing near the elevator, I was holding the newest and the others were all crowded around, (they ranged from 2ys to 14y) a young girl (early 20s) was trying to wade through the crowd and said "are they all yours?" to which we responded "yes", she then pointed to my still rather large belly and said "and you are having another one?" less than 24 hours after having given birth! I think not!! anyway we had a good laugh. (cbrouse23)

Are you going to have more?

* Yes, we just enjoy sex soooooo much!
* Why do you want to know?
* Well, not today.
* We are trying to get into the Guinness Book of World Records of (add whatever here) most kids, largest family living in one house, etc.
* OH YES! I want to have a family bigger then the one in my favorite movie "Yours, Mine & Ours!" only (add a # here) to beat the 19 they had!!
* Yes, I always want just one more.
* Well, we do have a twelve passenger van.
* Check back in nine months and you'll see for yourself.

Don't you know what causes that?

* No, please tell me!
* Of course, don't you?
* Yes, we do know what causes that and we like it very much, thank you.
* Oh yes, we finally figured it out and we now keep the tooth brushes in seperate glasses!
* Oh yes, I now wash my husband's underwear seperately.
* Oh yes, having a great sex life!
* Water or sex but I don't want to give up either.
* Smile brightly and say with enthusiasm "Yes and we like it!"
* You bet I do......love, love, love ( & sex, sex, sex.....hehehe.......)
* Yes! So don't get too close to me!
* It's in the water. Would you like a glass?
* Yes and I know WHO causes it! God gave us these children!
* Yes I do........cold winter nights.........
* LOVE! An overabundance of love!!
* Yes,and as you only have two kids obviously you dont do it much.
* Yes, and it is something I am very good at...
* Of course, and the Lord has greatly blessed us!
* A strong husband/wife relationship, big hearts, and the Lord's blessing.

Are you going to get fixed?

* Nope, I am not broken!
* Why do you want to know?
* Huh, we thought everything was working fine for us!?!
* We didn't know anything was broken.
* Don't you only fix things that aren't working properly?
* Well as you can see be the size of OUR family everything is in working order. :)(You have to say this last one with the kinda "I'm not to bright so your question seems kinda foolish don't you think?" attitude.

I can't believe how you do it, I cannot even handle my two!

* Yes, if I had kids like yours, I wouldn't have any more either!
* Yes, you don't strike me as the type who could handle more kids than that.
* I do it like most people, in bed and after the kids are sleeping.
* I put knobs on the kids. Makes them easier to handle.
* Everyone has 24 hours in a day, it is just how you use it...nt
* With lots of patience, patience, patience
* go and look at them while they're sleeping. This reminds me of what sweet children of God they are and keeps me going!
* Oh, I just do it. Wake up in the morning, do what you have to do all day, go to bed when it's done. nt
* Pick your battles carefully. It helps to have selective sight and hearing!
* Don't sweat the small stuff.
* (this is a good one for chat rooms) Oh, straight jackets and handcuffs!

Are you planning to have any more?

* I've been wondering about this and maybe you can explain it to me: I always thought you had to plan NOT to have more.
* Before we were married we planned on having 2, but I didn't know that my husband couldn't count!
* We didn't plan the first six, I don't think we'll plan the next six, either.

I hope you aren't planning to have anymore?!?

* You mean, I just figured out what I'm really, really good at, and you're telling me to stop doing it?
* Talk to God about it... it's up to Him.
* Well, we do have room in our van for 2 more.
* OK, I won't plan my next one. Surprises can be fun!
* Yup we are going to keep going till we get an ugly one.

Haven't you heard of birth control?

* Yes, and I thank God it doesn't always work!
* Yes, I've heard of it, I hope you are using it!
* (for dad) Yes, but I just can't find a rubber that will fit me!
* Yes, that's great stuff for people with ugly kids!
* Oh yes, we do know what birth control is; it's for people who don't want children.

Don't you have a television?

* Yes, but we only get X-rated channels
* Yes! Did you know there are 28 porn channels in this area?
* No, we have much better things to do at night!
* Yes 4 of them. Why?

How can you afford having so many?

* Lifestyles are expensive not kids.
* We're not on welfare, in huge amounts of debt, and no, my husband is not a doctor or lawyer. We just budget well.
* I figure you spend what you make, you may as well spend it on more.
* " You don't know my financial backer!" (Our God, of course)
* I'm still not sure how we do it...but it works!

Look at that double trouble! (for twins)

* No, they are double blessings!

I am glad it is you and not me!

* Yes, me too!
* My kids are glad it's me and not you too! ;-)
* Oh me too! I love being a mother! and smile real BIG!

Do you get any time for yourselves?

* Obviously we get a little time to ourselves, or we wouldn't have six kids.

Did you give birth to all of them?

* Yes, I gave birth to them all. Do you really believe the stork dropped them off?
* Yes, in my heart...... (for adoptive parents)

When people just keep staring at your family....

* No, we're not Catholic. No, we're not Mormon.
* Yes, they all are mine!
* No, we don't try to overpopulate the earth, just to outnumber the idiots!

Haven't You Had That Baby YET?!!?

* "YES. This is the NEXT ONE!!!!!!!!" See if that don't make their jaws drop!...of course if you have your favorite retorts plastered on t-shirts, you don't even need to open your mouth :D

[Schrodingers Cat]

Here's another I came across which works well with most comments, questions and quips...


"My husband and I have decided that, due to our superior genetic make-up, it is our duty to have a large family. How many children do YOU have?"

[SweetAngels]

:laughing: PMSL Schrodingers Cat I am going to write a few of those down and memorise them!! Those are just too good :D

[sja]

Sometimes when people ask me why I'm having a fourth (usually when the three are being a real handful), I'll tell them "so that at any given moment my odds of liking one of my kids will be increased," or I point to the naughtiest kid and say "so hubby won't notice when he comes home one day and that one is no longer around".

Also when MIL freaks out when the 14 month old does dangerous climbing stuff (like stands on his rocking horse without holding on!) I tell her "don't worry, they're dispensable - only takes 9 months to get a replacement".

[SweetAngels]

Sometimes when people ask me why I'm having a fourth (usually when the three are being a real handful), I'll tell them "so that at any given moment my odds of liking one of my kids will be increased," or I point to the naughtiest kid and say "so hubby won't notice when he comes home one day and that one is no longer around".

Also when MIL freaks out when the 14 month old does dangerous climbing stuff (like stands on his rocking horse without holding on!) I tell her "don't worry, they're dispensable - only takes 9 months to get a replacement".

LMAO see I wish I was that quick with the come backs :laughing: