Would you do your child's home work for them?

[Pippi Longstocking]

If your child was having a meltdown because they had an assignment due, would you do it for them?

I'm -not- going to but it is seriously tempting! My nearly 13yo has homework due in tomorrow. She missed the classes when this assignment was being talked about because we were away. She is all flapping around bleating and generally acting like a stressed hormonal teen and it would be far easier to just do it.

So would you? Poll coming...

[Noah_and_Elijah]

Absolutely not! I mean don't get me wrong I would feel for my child and would absolutely WANT to do it for them but I want to teach my children to be responsible and organise themselves, especially with school work.

If it is turning into a really big issue then I would sit with them and offer support and encouragement but they need to learn to do it on their own.

* I said that I would help them with it and by helping I mean encouragement etc *

[A Party of Five]

No I would not do it for them, but I would sit down with them and help them out :hugs:

[punkbaby]

No but i would help in those circumstances as she missed the classes. if she was at the classes i wouldnt help though :)

i wouldnt do it for them though but assist unless it was their own slackness then its all theirs!

[Seekrit]

No, but I would help out as much as I could... It's hard but yeah, it teaches them responsibility. Could you call into the school and ask for an extension, due to being away?

[werdxela]

I Have "helped" my son with school assignments.

Not defending my self but he has sensory problems and these tasks envolved completing things that were way outside his comfort level.

[forbetoel]

No I wouldn't and yes if they were going to fail or something it would be very tempting, but I would never do it. I would help by offering advice but that is it.

[Theboys&me]

No - Don't do it!!!!! Nah really, I am a teacher and you can normally tell when it is the kids work and when they have had adult help.

Hope she is ok - send a note to the teacher.

[Noah_and_Elijah]

Not defending my self but he has sensory problems and these tasks envolved completing things that were way outside his comfort level.

Please don't think that this is an attack because I am genuinely curious...

If the assingment was outside his comfort zone wouldn't it have been more beneficial to bring it to the attention of his teacher and worked on it together rather than pretty much doing it for him. Would he learn anything from that?

[subaruforestermum]

My mum use to do mine for me sometimes when I was younger, as I was always someone who left things til the last minute, then I was so scared of loosing my A+ grades I would beg mum to do it.... So she would do the research and I would put it in my own words and put it together!

I dont think I would go that far with my son, unless he is having trouble finding info on a certain topic!

But I would definately encourage him to get it done ahead of time.

I have always been an A grade student, in the top maths, and english class, A's in Art, A's in Legals, B's Ecomonics and would like my son to be academic also!!! By his own merits!

[Pippi Longstocking]

Yeah, I thought about asking for an extension. I might do that.

She is currently taking a break from it, she got upset and teary so I told her to stop for a while. It's not worth her being that upset about it. She is such a good little student, she takes it so seriously. She gets upset if she gets less than a B on her work - my own little Lisa Simpson (she's even vegetarian and plays the saxophone :laughing: )

[KapowSchazam]

WOW this has to be the most one-sided poll I've ever seen!!! :eek:

[ikis84]

Poor thing. It's not worth that much stress over, but it's a waste if you do it

[werdxela]

It involved making a paper mache model. He cant touch the mushed up paper it freaks him out (lots of differebt types of things do). The teacher knows this and wasn't willing to accomdate him. I did the work that involved touching the paper and he did all the painting and wrote out the instructions on how it was done.

[Noah_and_Elijah]

Thanks werdxela :)

As I said I wasn't attacking you I really was genuinely interested. That's a shame that the teacher wouldn't accommodate him. I bet it was a good model. :D

[Pantalaimon]

In the opinion of a high school teacher...

Doing it for her would mean that she hasnt really learnt anything about it. The best thing for her would be to go and see the teacher and talk to them about some extra time and possibly some notes. It will only add to her character in the longterm being able to ask the teacher for help or time when it is needed. However she probably should have seen the teacher before now...

[Angelmist♥]

I don't think I would do it for them but I would help a lot:D

[studyingECS]

No I wouldn't help her.....I know what its like to get very upset over it so hugs to her:hugs: But I have been in that situation before where I only had one night to do it, I tried and I failed but I learnt from that, now I make sure I have left enough time to do abit each night and not worry about it too much.

Just let her know to do as much as she feels able to do without stressing...if she hands it in and fails its ok because she tried.

[Ky]

I was notorious for leaving my assignments to the last minute. I always got good grades when I did them, it was just that I would get up at around 2am the morning they were due and do it all then! Mind you, I had a little sister that was a pain in the butt who was 6 years younger than me and was allowed to come in and disturb me when I was supposed to be working - it just got easier to say there was nothing to do and then get up when everyone else was sleep!

I did once have to do a book report on a book that really disturbed me. I was 10yo and I just couldn't get past the first few pages - it just really freaked me badly. My Mum stayed up all night with me and read it aloud to me, then she sent me off to do my report - this was the only time I remember her helping me, but I am still really, really grateful for her help and support then.

My DD is only 6 (year 1) and her homework is very little at the moment, but she knows that it is top priority to be done before play on tuesdays and wednesdays. She is supposed to space it out over 3 days and hand it in on thursdays, but she has dance class on mondays and is so tired by the time we have had dinner that it is better to let her relax and spend a bit more time doing it on the next 2 nights. It certainly has resulted in a better standard of work from her since I relaxed the rigid routine just a little ...

[ShadyCharacter]

Well I am a **** parent :) I said 'it depends'. I wouldn't consistently be doing my childs homework (if only because I have already done my time :p), but in a one off situation like this, where the child is usually a good student, I would.... help A LOT. I may not actually do it, but I would give way more help than I should if you know what I mean?

It's a grade 8 assignment.... not worth losing sleep over IMO. I think at the end of the day, if it isn't going to be a frequent thing, give the poor kid a break.

[Shanaynay]

I'm not sure.

Can't really think about it because I'm very anti-homework and the girls will not receive homework at all in primary school, and only infrequently in high school.

[Mum&bubs]

No, I wouldn't do it for her but I would do everything I could to help her. I'd help her research the topic then talk about it with her then give her the assignment to do and if she needs me, I will help again.

[prideNJoy]

Well I am a **** parent :) I said 'it depends'. I wouldn't consistently be doing my childs homework (if only because I have already done my time :p), but in a one off situation like this, where the child is usually a good student, I would.... help A LOT. I may not actually do it, but I would give way more help than I should if you know what I mean?

It's a grade 8 assignment.... not worth losing sleep over IMO. I think at the end of the day, if it isn't going to be a frequent thing, give the poor kid a break.

I would do as the above post says ^.

Im not fond of the whole 'HOMEwork' thing anyway, esp if it is going to stress a young child to the point of tears and frustration.

My mum used to help me when i was younger if i got into one of these states.
I don't think the child learns nothing. I was present when the assignment or homework was being done.

[~mia&ryan~]

No I would not do it for them, but I would sit down with them and help them out :hugs:
Yep exactly what I would do... My parents never did my homework but they would help and go through things with me if I needed help...

[Lastcenturymum]

No way! What what that teach them?

I would point them in the right direction and offer advice (and as they get older, only if asked :p )

Wasn't there someone on here recently doing their partners assignments? :shame:

[ButterflyMama]

No way. Part of the learning process is learning how to stand after you fall. Failing is a part of that.

[charlen49]

no..but help ( being ateacher helps!)..they will never learn if you do it for them..and that includes from failure...sometimes learning from their mistakes are the best lessons!..I let my now 11yrold do her work then i go over it with her and make suggestions sometimes(such as a speech etc) how it could be improved..usually she just needs to rearrange her her own words..she's doing very well overall..blitzed her BST's getting 6's in literacy and Maths..im lucky she loves school and she is involved in sports and excells in the creative arts too..so this proud mumma likes to encourage rather then do!

[Mamalicious]

No way. Part of the learning process is learning how to stand after you fall. Failing is a part of that.

That's true.

I don't *think* I would help. Your DD wasn't at the classes, which would make it alot harder, I dunno why she wasn't there but if it was my DS I would have told him to get the missed work sent to him.

I don't like homework anyway, I think once you get home, schools finished. It's just a horrible stressful thing. :no:

[Veritas]

No I would most definitely not ever do an assignment for my child..... Homework is not only about additional learning, but more importantly about teaching a child to take responsibility for themselves and be organised....

If she had not found out at all about the assignment until the last few days, I might write a letter to the teacher explaining and requesting an extension or something of the sort.... however if she had been aware of its existence but just not taken the initiative to ask the teacher for the appropriate information since returning, then she would be on her own to deal with the consequences.....

[Susan Mac]

"If you do your child's homework now, you'll be running their law firm in 20 years" Can't remember where I heard that, but I liked it.
When I was teaching, I HATED marking kids assignments that I knew their parents had done. I ended up having to give them an A, because they met all the criteria, but it wasn't there work.

I will help my kids with their homework when they get to school, but only in a directional 'Mum I'm stuck' sort of way. I proofread my sisters' assignments regularly, and give them a kickstart if they are stuck on what the task means, or how to get started. It usually involves grilling them on what they have done in class on various aspects of the task.

[Susan Mac]

I don't like homework anyway, I think once you get home, schools finished. It's just a horrible stressful thing. :no:


ME NEITHER.



If she had not found out at all about the assignment until the last few days, I might write a letter to the teacher explaining and requesting an extension or something of the sort.... however if she had been aware of its existence but just not taken the initiative to ask the teacher for the appropriate information since returning, then she would be on her own to deal with the consequences.....

I think that's a good approach. I Teachers are generally very understanding when a parent approaches them. Much less understanding when the kid just doesn't show up with the assignment. At least a note on the day it is due helps!!!

[*babygirl*]

i would HELP *give her direct pointers etc* and encourage her not to give up... unless it was through DIRECT fault of their own that they procrastinated/skipped class/ played with friends instead/ left it till the last second/ was too busy kissing boys instead.... IYKWIM

if she was genuinely STUCK and had been for a while then i would have no hesiation in helping her. but i wouldnt DO IT for her either.

[studyingECS]

How did she go Guv?

[QTB]

No, but I would help them with it