Needing encouragement

[lovemybub]

Okay, I'm probably a little run down having had a restless baby the last two days, and maybe I'm just spoiled because my DD is usually so happy and cooperative, but I'm just feeling a little unsure about my own instincts now.

For a few weeks now, Elizabeth (15.5 weeks old) has only been sleeping for an hour at time during the day. I try and get her back to sleep when she wakes up, and occasionally she will drop off, but it usually only lasts 5-10 minutes. She doesn't usually cry or anything, but will really start struggling (and grunting) to get out of her wrap.

At the moment she is usually up for 1.5 - 2 hours between sleeps. She sleeps fine at night (usually does about 10 hours in two or three stretches - and we're cosleeping, so night-time feeds are really easy), but lately she has been really hard to settle for a sleep. I'm just wondering if that's because she's over tired. I thought babies still needed more sleep than that at her age.

I guess I know all the theories, but I just wanted to hear from some other natural/attachment parenting people that I'm not 'making a rod for my own back' by cuddling or rocking her to sleep. I guess I've kind of been feeling as though I must be doing something wrong because she's been so restless the last few days, but all babies have restless periods don't they? Is it normal for babies to only sleep an hour at a time at her age? Should I be persevering with trying to get her back to sleep for another hour or so? It's just that it's really draining getting her to sleep sometimes lately, hence the nagging 'rod for my own back' voice in the back of my mind...

Confused and unsure :confused:

[rockabye]

Hi there,

I guess just try to stay calm, I know its not easy but they pick up on our emotions so easily. How is everything with her, is she starting to teeth, or have her bowel movements changed?? I really don't think it matters if you give her a cuddle once in a while, but I am a great believer in trying not to make bad habits. They get into those easily enough themselves.

Really trust your instincts, you know your baby best.

I found with my little boy that around 3 months he hated being wrapped so I wrapped his body and left his arms out, it worked a treat for me.

Take care and I hope things settle for you.

Jo

[drewid]

Hey there :)

Hugs for you...having a restless baby is exhausting!

I think that for 15 weeks, sleeping for blocks of an hour is great! If she doesn't resettle, I'd take that to mean she's had enough sleep and give up after 10 minutes.

The waking time of 1.5-2 hours sounds normal to me too. They are getting more aware and more interested in being awake and I'm fairly sure Andrew was doing the same thing at the same age.

The books give you a guideline of the amount of sleep a baby needs, but all are different, and their needs change constantly. Generally your bub will sleep as much as they need to, and theres not terribly much you can do about it. If she is having that 10 hour sleep at night and a few naps during the day, I think thats plenty.

Cuddling and rocking to sleep at that age is totally fine too, dont' let anyone tell you it isn't!! You just do what works for you, and when they're still so little, why stop giving them the comfort they need to settle?

You're DEFINITELY not doing anything wrong, so dont' despair! Most bubs are unsettled at times, its only natural.

Hugs for you - you're doing a great job! :yelclap:

[draught]

I take the view that no amount of cuddling to sleep etc is wrong until it isn't working for you and baby anymore. (I had to find new ways of getting DD2 to sleep when I developed RSI from rocking her to sleep in my arms:rolleyes: otherwise we would probably still be doing it ). If cuddling gets her back down then do it. If she is waking happy though, I wouldn't fight to get her back down - some babies don't need a lot of day time sleep. My DD1 was like that until she was 2 - before then her longest day time sleep was 1 hour - and she woke happy. At about 2 years her day time sleeps starting stretching out and now I have to wake her otherwise she will sleep for 3 hours in the day and be up all night! with the amount of night sleep you are getting a few shorter day time sleeps sounds just fine.

[Goosie22]

Hi lovemybub
your doing a great job keep it up. Its tiring with wakeful babies just remember you get out what you put in;) your inline for one big payoff.

I found with my first who fed frequently, didn't sleep and didn't like to be put down that a sling was really good, he didn't seem as restless, he even managed to sleep a little better.

Its not going to be this hard for ever.

[BJelly]

Hi,

My bub has always slept well at night, but some babies tend to cat nap during the day - mine would go for 30 mins to an hour if I was lucky. They definitely go through unsettled periods, and change their patterns when they hit a new level of awareness or development - for me, it always felt that every time I found a new way to settle her she'd change her pattern again, and I'd be back at square one. I also went through periods of self doubt - being a mother feels like you need to be part mind reader - after all most of the time we are just guessing as to what is causing our babies to cry, and we just work our way through the list (tired, hungry, wet, pain, wind, constipation, teething etc).

As long as you and bub are happy with what you are doing, there is no problem - there's plenty of time to teach them good sleeping habits when they get older - I don't think you can ruin your baby by soothing them - especially when they are so little.

[Mum2Lucas]

DS only sleeps for 10-20 mins at a time during the day and only has about 2 sleeps unless im in the bed with him. will not sleep if im no there so if i need to do housework i put him in the sling and he sleeps for a little bit longer. He's 6 months. i think its just a stage. And I always rock him to sleep or if he wont go to sleep ad i know hes really tired the sling always works a treat.
Keep up the good work.

[JanetF]

You're doing beautifully! My 2 yr old now sleeps 2-3 hours in the daytime but that stuff can only happen as their brains mature. They need to be parented to sleep until they can do it themselves. And each one is very different in those needs! Yay for you! Like Goosie said, with kids you get back what you put in. Love and comfort is what to put in! You're doing great :smiliedance: Read the sleep resources links again and feel proud that you're catering to your child's needs not trying to make him be convenient.

[lovemybub]

Thanks everyone for your encouragement. I am feeling better about things today. I know I'm doing the right thing, but I guess I was just feeling a bit worn out, and needed to be reminded that that's a normal part of parenting!

:hugs:

[KatherineIV]

Morgan was a nightmare at that age for sleeping during the day. I'd be lucky to get a twently minute nap out of him 2-3 times a day. My Community nurse told me he needs to speak more... but I guess the reality of the situation is if they don't want to sleep there is not a way to force them to do so... He go out of that at about 6 months. He now wakes at 7am... down at 11.30.. sleeps till 1.30pm... usually an hour between 4-5pm and then bed at 7pm..

I can tell you my life changed the day that my little angel started napping... I feel like I get things achieved now... I felt that when he was awake all day that I should be right next to him all day and let alot of the day to day things slip by me.

*fingers crossed* I hope everything settles down for you... I'm sure it will