I feel like I'm going backwards

[SimplyMum]

We were doing ok. Just moved out so feeling really independent and strong. Today I was heading off to work and my car wouldn't start. It ended up costing $230 to get it fixed. I want a full time job to help get a bit of savings and to have a little bit of movement for my son and I. But everytime I seem to do ok, something comes along and knocks me right back down.
Why is this? Is this the universe's cruel way of saying 'See, I told you you couldn't do it, I told you it would be too hard to be single parent'.

Now, I live out of home. My sis moves out in a month- in that time I'm supposed to have $1040 saved for bond and I still have to get a dining table, a DVD player and a $250 floor to go in the garage. Now, I have 0 savings and my credit card is maxed out. What am I supposed to do when brick walls keep popping up without warning. I feel like the Little Caboose in the Little Golden book 'The Little Caboose' when he's in the green meadow and all the red flags keeping popping up out of the daisies and he has to STOP because every little Caboose knows that he must stop for a red flag waving!!!

:banghead: :banghead: :banghead: :banghead:

[ashleerose]

Okay yes i know exactly what you mean (i feel like they are all watching me up there and having a good laugh and atm it seems as if everyday is a trial).

With your bond you can apply with the Dept of housing commission for a bond thingy (forgot what its called but i applied for one when i first left my ex to get into a house), they will either a) make you pay it of at ten dollars or so a fn or b) when you move again they will have it return back to them.

With the flooring (im not sure why you need to get flooring if you are moving out? unless its damaged?) really cannot thing of anything to help you with that one atm but it can always be deducted from your bond (can your sister help you out with this one).

Tables, okay time to go garage saleing or op shopping (i know they might not be the best on the market but as long as it has four legs and a top it will do).

Dvd players (well this isnt really an essential) but is it possible that a family member can lend you one of theirs (if they have a spare) if not a friend.
If not shop around they are cheaper in go-lo and supermarkets.

All i can do for you now is send you some good fortune your way.

[Xanthic]

Please ignore the below if this is not what you were after. It's my way of trying to be supportive.

1) Credit cards are a trap but fortunately there is a way to break away. Interest rates are much higher on credit cards than most personal loans. It may be worth while going to the bank and enquiring about a loan for the amount you owe on the credit card (maybe even the bond). Depending on the duration of the loan you could then pay off the owed money over longer period of time and actually get it payed off.

The key is determining your interest rate that is accumulating on the credit card and the amount of interest you will be paying on a loan. It's very important to try getting into a position of spending your money and not someone else's.

If you go for the loan method try organise a starting date in a month or two's time. That way you may be able to get a little bit of breathing room.

If an interest free loan from family or friends is possible then even better but very important to set a pay schedule. It's much easier to pay a small amount each month than paying off all debt in one hit.

While you have money owed on the credit card you will not be able to save as you will be getting yourself further into debt. A lot of credit cards have an interest of 16% (sometimes as high as 19%) and the best savings accounts only come in at 6%. This means if you have $1000 in a savings account and $1000 owed on a credit card then over a year you would be earning $60 interest (and paying tax on that interest) from the savings account but losing an extra $160 from the credit card. It makes no sense putting money into a saving account unless the interest earned is higher than the interest payed on the credit card/loan.

2) The dining table and DVD player seem like much lower priorities. The key to breaking the credit card's hold over you is by prioritising what you really need and what you can live without till you in a position you can afford them.

It is possible to live without a table for a few months.

3) Write down on paper each time you spend money and keep track of it. You may be surprised how much you spend on items you can manage without. You will likely find a few dollars here and there for a little treat or a means to pay off debt quicker. This in turn can get you into the position when you can buy those items you really want.

[SimplyMum]

Very good advice but thanks in large part to my nievity and stupidity and of course my beloved ex, I don't have a very good credit rating so I don't think I would be able to get a personal loan. Although I might take my chances and go and see my bank next week- what have I got to lose right?

[OneBabyBoy]

Hi Lee :hugs:

I am not getting ahead and it's because I live by myself. I know I won't be able to live here much longer financially. I think maybe that's just one of the realities of a single parent with your own place?

I find it helps to write lists. To help prioritise everything you need. Also makes you feel good as you cross things off.

Is it possible for you to sell your car and live without it? I don't have one and while sometimes can be a pain in the bum I seriously couldn't afford it at all. Sometimes people can't imagine living without a car but it is possible and you'll have more money.

Good luck with everything Lee :hugs:

[tyler's mum]

I know the feeling lee a few months back i was really behide in all my bills. I finally got up to date and had a bit of credit on them all. Now im starting to fall behide again:o

Money is so EVIL i wish i had more but i just try to make do with what i have. I hope things gets better for you soon:hugs: :hugs: You never know you may get that laon and things could/will get better

[Xanthic]

The bank does not want you to go bankrupt as it will lose the money you owe on your credit card if you do.

It's actually in their best interest to help. Well as long as you get a customer service officer that knows what they are talking about.

I'd go in and ask their advice without first asking about a low interest loan. I'm sure they deal with this type of situation all the time. They may delay the payments for a few months or something to give you the break you need to get back on top. You can always ask for a loan if they don't volunteer the info.

[Lastcenturymum]

"Why is this? Is this the universe's cruel way of saying 'See, I told you you couldn't do it, I told you it would be too hard to be single parent'"

No honey, its not. Its just part of living on this earth and it happens to everyone and usually comes in threes (sorry, its just an expression) So don't think it's you. If we buy cars, they break down, if we have a house, things break and need fixing or they wear out. We have kids and they get sick and moody.

Some people seem to get more 'bad stuff' happen than others but everyone seems to get what they are able to deal with.

Go look at your sleeping gorgeous child tonight and you will remember it is all worth it and tomorrow is a new day:kiss:

[OneBabyBoy]

The problem with applying for a loan when you have a bad credit rating is that the application still registers on there even if they knock you back.
So then for the next 7 years it says on there that you have applied for a loan from X bank and does not say whether it was approved or not.
If you go for future loans or whatever they will see that and go with caution to assume you did get approved for that loan. Therefore making it more difficult in future.
Like Xanthic said go in and ask them about it before you actually apply.
Trust me, I found this out the hard way.
Do you have any defaults Lee?
You can get a copy of your credit rating for free from Baycorp Advantage and you'll see on there how it records everything like that.

[ashleerose]

OneBabyBoy

Totally agree with your post.

Here i was with my car on its last legs and thinking yep i have some savings and i will get a loan.
So i go researching all about the kind of car i want.
I post questions on the net and ask everyone.

Then i decided i would get such and such car.

Lucky break for me was that my bil could get me one of the ex coca cola cars for me (without the logo etc with 70,000 klms on it as thats when they trade them in) and it would have been for a good price.

So i ring around the banks and find out about the interest rates, repayments blah, blah, blah.

I ring anz (who i bank with and have done so for a while i have a credit card with them but dont owe much on it at all) and after going through my finances and everything else with the person over the phone he says to me unfortuanately most of your income is made up of centerlink payments (doh!) and we dont count that as income :confused: (meanwhile this money is spent the same way as all my other income).

I then ring NRMA (because i have contents, car insurance, greenslip, alarm and monitioring, and road side assist - all i need now is shares in the company).

Everything is going fine, next thing the lady on the phone says 'sorry we cannot give you a loan' arrrgh basically because not long ago i went shopping around for a cheaper credit card (when my debt was higher and i thought i could save some money) and in doing so although i never went ahead with anything its on my credit file :banghead: .

So now i have to keep on saving because i have no other option until next years tax cheque etc i refuse to settle for another car the same as mine and go through the same thing over and over again (as i have done so many times :no: ).

Meanwhile, i have never been so better at budgeting my money i mean for the first time in my life i got an electricity bill with 'no payment required' and the bill before that only had to pay $3.00, all my other bills rent etc are in front as i pay extra on it in case things go wrong as they always seem to do and i have savings in the bank :hair:

[SimplyMum]

I can't get rid of my car as I work and I need it to get DS to daycare and to get to work so unfortunately that's a no-no.

I have decided on a few things. I am going to apply to the dept of housing for help to pay for the bond.
I am going to talk to the bank and see if I can work something out with the credit card. Hopefully a personal loan as it's the interest that's killing me.

And I've decided that we can do without a dining table, coffee table and lamp table and iron for the time being. I work and work requires buisness attire so every weekend I'm going to go over Mum and Dad's and iron all my work shirts for the week (hey, this will also save me time in the morning- more time to clean!!!!)

[SimplyMum]

Well, I just spoke to Dept of Housing and they can't help me out with the bond!:gloomy:

Well, from the top of the hope hill to the bottom of the despair valley!

I suppose I ju have to hope that I can get a full time job quicker and work something out with studies. why does it have to be so hard?!

[OneBabyBoy]

Lee, do you have any family or friends that could lend the bond money to you?

[Mum2Bug]

Lee dont let it get to you hun. You will get there slowly but it all takes time unfortunately. I know how hard it is to do financially, and Im not even running a car or paying daycare fees. The way I figure it, things happen for a reason, even if it is just so we can prove to ourselves how strong we are to get ourselves out of these struggles. It hurts in the meantime but you will get there.

[SweetSerenity]

Oh Lee I'm so sorry :(

Money is the root of all evil and I despise it with every inch of my body!

I know how you feel.

I'm doing it very tough right now too (the story of my life)... I have my $600 greenslip due next week for my car, I have my usual bills I have to pay, I have my drivers license expiring in 2 weeks also AND have to get 4 brand new tyres for my car and the make up jobs I do have booked in aren't till after all of these things are due :(

It really is so hard.

I totally sympathise with you and I know what you mean by feeling like theres no light at the end of the tunnel.

:hugs:

[SimplyMum]

Well, to make things that little bit more interesting I asked work if there were any full time positions avaiable at the moment. No- there are not!
Although they don't want to lose me so they told me to 'hang in there' and gave me a 50c pay increase. WHOA- that's gonna give me a whole $7.50 more a week.
Yeah, well there not going to be paying my rent and bills so they can stick there 50c pay increase- I will be looking for a new job!

thanks M2B and SS- Sometimes it's nice to just have someone pat ya on the back and say there there, it'll be alright.

OBB- I can't, everyone else is pretty much struggling just the same. The only that probably isn't is my sis and she gets annoyed when people think she isn't struggling like the rest of us (although she earns $130K and is single with no dependents. I wouldn't mind 'struggling' on that!).

I'm just gonna have to pull a rubbit out of my a*se!:wizard:

[OneBabyBoy]

50cents!!!! That's more like an insult. Good on you for looking for a new job - I would too.

[SweetSerenity]

I'm just gonna have to pull a rubbit out of my a*se!:wizard:

Lmao... oh I love your humour... maybe I should try that one too?? :o :p :laughing:

[V8]

I really feel for you, you're doing it so tough and keep battling on, it's so hard when as soon as you feel you've picked yourself up, you are back down again. I am surprised the bond place won't help you, that's odd? Do you get anything from Centrelink, can you maybe get an advance payment of $500 that they offer.

I hope you can also get a better paying job to help out with bills. And yeah, your sis sounds like she's got it good, do you think she may help out?

[SimplyMum]

I really feel for you, you're doing it so tough and keep battling on, it's so hard when as soon as you feel you've picked yourself up, you are back down again. I am surprised the bond place won't help you, that's odd? Do you get anything from Centrelink, can you maybe get an advance payment of $500 that they offer.

I hope you can also get a better paying job to help out with bills. And yeah, your sis sounds like she's got it good, do you think she may help out?

Yeah, I rang them early this morning and the young gentleman on the phone said that because I already live there it is a private arrangement. I get where there coming from. How can they be sure that I'm not just trying to scam them I guess. But it doesn't solve my problem.

No, she wont help out. She's now paying a mortgage!

I do get centrelink benefits but I can't get an advance payment as when I started this job I stuffed up the reporting (I didn't account for overtime pay and put it in as normal rates, and than didn't find out I was doing it wrong until sometime later), so I now owe centrelink money. They just take a small portion out of my centrelink pay each fortnight.

I'm sure my Mum would help me out if nessessary but that would just put incredible financial strain on her and I don't really want to do that. My Mum already does so much for me.

[V8]

Hmm bummer... :(

[SweetSerenity]

Lee is there anything you could maybe sell off on ebay or something??

I recently sold peters timber change table/chest of drawers and got approx $175 which helped out with bills that I needed to pay for... If you could maybe get together some things that you may get an decent amount for???

[SimplyMum]

Lee is there anything you could maybe sell off on ebay or something??

I recently sold peters timber change table/chest of drawers and got approx $175 which helped out with bills that I needed to pay for... If you could maybe get together some things that you may get an decent amount for???

Mmmm....an interesting thought. I might have a little think about this tonight. Bailey's change table is his chest of drawers which is why I got them- so can't do that one but I'm sure I can find some stuff that we're not keeping. Like his high chair- the only thing is that my nephew is using it. I don't want to be an indian giver!!!!

[SweetSerenity]

Mmmm....an interesting thought. I might have a little think about this tonight. Bailey's change table is his chest of drawers which is why I got them- so can't do that one but I'm sure I can find some stuff that we're not keeping. Like his high chair- the only thing is that my nephew is using it. I don't want to be an indian giver!!!!

Lol... yeah no indian giver isn't good hahaha.

Thats like peters... his was both combined but I was lucky that I had a set of drawers from my parents that they dont use so I use that now for him.

I still have a few things I will be selling that we no longer use or need ... It's definately worth a thought :thumbsup:

[SimplyMum]

Well, the bank wont approve me for a personal loan until I get a full time job. In the mean time they said I have to grin and bear it. :( :mad:

[OneBabyBoy]

Lee if you absolutely can't get money anywhere else you might have to go to the salvo's explain it to them and ask for a loan.