My Fault

[romey]

hi,
i havent been on here for a while, mainly because with a 3yo and 1yo who has the time!

i just lost my baby at 15weeks and feel completely responsible. i was over doing the house work and the kids were sick and i hadnt had any sleep and moved a matress which my daughter wet to another room so it could dry... that night i lost my baby in the toilet .... i bleed so much i couldnt stand and kept fainting... my husband after calling my OB rushed me to hospital to have a emergency curet as there was still a lot of tissue and placenta inside that hadnt come out.
other than the normal grieving emotions and constant tears, i actually believe like it was my fault. if i hadnt moved that matress i would still be prenant.... i dont know if im ever going to be able to forgive myself!!! :crying: :crying:

[wannabemum]

Looking after your kids and being a "mum" does not make you at fault. It makes you a caring and loving mum, as usual putting the family first. I am extremely sorry for your loss and pray that you will be blessed with another pregnancy (if you so wish), soon. :hugs:

Please don't be so hard on yourself. Women can miscarriage from doing nothing at all, don't blame yourself and let yourself grieve without the added pressure. :hugs: :hugs: :hugs:

Lots of love and hugs to you at this difficult time xxx

[Tam-I-Am]

Oh, sweetheart - I think that its normal to feel as though there must have been SOMETHING you could have done to prevent the loss of a bubba - but the fact of the matter is, there isn't anything you hadn't done. If you hadn't moved the mattress, this STILL would have happened.

Please go talk to your OB and hear this from the professional who can tell you definitively this is the case.

:hugs:

Take care of yourself.

[PaperTiger]

romey, I agree with the two above posts.
You were doing everything you could to take care of your family, please dont be so hard on yourself like that.
In any case it was nothing to do with moving the mattress, that was just a coincidence pure and simple, 15 week old fetus' are surprisingly tough and well implanted, it would take a lot more than moving a mattress to cause a miscarriage in that way.
I hope you feel better real soon. :hugs:

[kryslove]

im so sorry to hear of your loss, please dont blame yourself it wasnt you're fault, these things us mums cant control, i lost my bubby at 15 weeks only 2 and half weeks ago, i also blamed myself because i had lifted a small cupboard a week before my loss, but i was told by many people including doctors that it wasnt the cause, i found out my bubby had a heart defect, so it wasnt my fault, he would never had survived the birth.

i wish the best for you, my heart goes out to you.

kryslove.

[floggadog]

So sorry for your loss.
You are not responsible for loosing your babe. it takes alot more than moving a matress to cause a miscarriage.
Unfortunatly you will never know why this happened but it may have just been that something was not right with bub & this was natures way.
Maybe you can hold a ceremony or plant a tree to mark bubs' existence.
hugs to you & your hubby.