unfair system

[Disgruntled single mum]

I would like to get in contact with any single mums that are in the same situation as me in order to begin some form of lobby group etc. My story is as follows:

I am a single mum with a 4.5 year old son. I have been his sole provider and carer for the past 3 years. He has had regular visits to his dads every second weekend. I am also a full time University student and therefore my son attends child care in which I am responsible for all the child care costs. During the past 3 years I have received only minimal child support through the Child Support Agency due to my ex relocating places of employment when the system catches up with him. As the Child Support Agency's system is so ineffective it takes months before they can find where he is working through the tax department and then months to set up pay roll deductions - with the whole process sometimes taking 6 months - and then he quits to work somewhere else and is able to "dodge the system" for long periods of time. Meanwhile I am solely responsible for my sons welfare. He currently owes $3000 in child support arrears.
Recently, due to a change in my university contact hours, we agreed to shared care of our son, who now spends 8 nights per fortnight with me and 6 nights per fortnight at his dads. Two months ago I started to receive child support equalling $31 per week for support and $35 per week for repayment of arrears, $66 per week in total.
Due to the change in care arrangements my ex partner is now entitled to a percentage of Family Tax Benefit. I was contacted last week by Centrelink and the amount that my Family Tax is being reduced by is $54 per week or $108 per fortnight, a considerable amount for a single mum studying. I have also been billed by Centrelink for $1200 for repayment of Family Tax that has been overpaid to me.
My concern is that I have $3000 owing to me by my working ex partner and I am now required to pay back money that has automatically been paid to him for arrears. Why cant my debt with Centrelink be deducted from his repayments to Child Support Agency. Both are Government Departments and I believe that they could work together more effectively to prevent this apparent injustice to single parents.
The changes to my pay mean that I am paying to my ex partner $23 more per week than I am receiving in child support, not including the arrears that he is repaying. And there is no quarantee that I will continue receiving child support as he can change jobs tomorrow and avoid payment and cause me to lose this money for a lenghty period of time.
My suggestion is that Centrelink and CHild support work together - for example - if Centrelink were to deduct only $23 per week from Family Tax, rather than $54, to go to my ex then I would not have to rely on money from Child Support, other than the arrears that I am already owed. Also why should I be made to pay back a debt to someone who already owes me thousands! And I have been primary carer for my son and he now resides with me 2 nights more a fortnight than at his dads!
Is there anyone else in the same situation as me? I am sure there is!
I have written a letter to my local MP regarding this injustice and also contacted Today Tonight and The Advertiser in order to get some media attention.
If you would like to get involved please email me at:
kylie75@dodo.com.au

[ThomasMum]

at least you've got money from the government, all we ever do to the government is paying tax! 50% of the salary, what a joke!

weve just had a baby recently (thomas is now 8 weeks old), the cost of childcare of $80/day in our area (north sydney), but do we get anything from the government? any benefit? nope nothing zilch! because apparently our income is too high!

thankfully i am on long maternity leave...but to think about my poor husband working so hard only 50% of his salary goes down the drain for nothing!

so trust me, everyone is pretty much screwed by the government :mad:

[Miss_Vicki]

HUgs I jsut know HOW much of a Crappy system CSA can be BUt i get sick of them too.. sperm donner (he dont want anythin to do with her most of time) was workin bettween 2 jobs To dodge csa but lucky with my ringin ever 2nd or 3rd day somethin worked out

BUt yes as every yr he Owes me about 1000-1500 a yr an casue i get it ontop of my payments i have to pay them money WTF....

ie i was back payed money from over 2 yrs ago last yr an i had to turn around an I had to pay centerlink 700$$ for recivein a back pay...
I totaly agree SOmethin needs to be done , csa an centerlink Work together BUt NOT as much as u an I both agree..
i jsut wanted to say I agree an KNOW just how u feel , there Needs to be somethin done with this Rediculoues child support in ausstrial Too many ppl get stuffed around , men an women by it :/

arg sorry im rammberling :O

what type of things would u be tryin to Loby for an what woul du be doin?

[Willow]

Not in the same situation as you, but sympathise.... My sons dad has gone on to have 3 more children after we seperated... (3 in the space of 2 and a half years) Maintenance? what a joke, he pays next to nothing because he has a responsibility to his new wife and kids...

His sister told me they keep on having babies because of the baby bonus etc payments. Their 2nd was born before a week before this $3k thing came in so they are planning another one.

My question is 'what about his first born child?' Where does he fit into this picture? He has needs which in the order of things should be at least as important as his younger siblings... But government departments don't seem to care.

For you, no matter how much your ex has your child you still have the same day to day living costs, how will you manage on so little? Could you organize something with the ex so that on paper you have the tiddleywink 7 days a week and can get full payments?

[Disgruntled single mum]

Yeh that all sounds good in theory, but there is no way he is going to agree to that considering he is now a lot better off financially!
There are some serious flaws in the system and I know that there are a lot of women out there in a lot worse situations than I am.
There is currently a taskforce into child support, the finding of it should be released in the next few weeks! Keep your eye on the media!
Lets hope it brings about some positive change!
:)

[kailensmum]

What else really stinks about the whole system is that if you don't chase the
*^#@% (you know what i mean!!) for child support you get your family tax benefit reduced. And even if you do and the child support doesn't get paid your payments from FTO & centrelink are still paid to you as if you were recieving it. I wouldn't have even bothered trying to get anything off my ex cos I know that he won't pay it, but the wonderful government agencies say I have to.
Just question if anyone knows... If he doesn't pay it, do I get anything from centrelink etc at tax time, or do they just hope that he'll be good boy and one day have a concience and actually provide for his child.
And for all you dads who do right thing, I praise you, because I know that there are just as many worthless mothers out there who behave in this manner.
I hope the mongrel doesn't get a tax return, because he sure don't deserve it.
Wow, I've had my whinge!!
I love my son and have a lovely day everyone!!!
( I really an I happy and contented mum!!!) :D

[Disgruntled single mum]

funny thing is, my child support has now stopped! so i have suffered a huge FTB cut which is going to him, and now not getting child support!
how ironic!
maybe the people that are disgruntled with the tax system should take it out on the good for nothing fathers that continually rort the system!!!!!!!!!!! Not the single mothers who continually get screwed!

[kamckellar]

My Ex Husband Pays Child Support ....now.after Being With Him For 10 Years I Know Exactly What He Earns.the Lying S.o.b Gave Csa An Estimate $25,000 Less Than He Earns.its Been 3 Yrs Since We Sep And He Still Hasnt Put A Tax Return In.so When We Went To Court For Our Property Settlement We Both Had To Fill Out An Income Statement Report.s.o.b Didnt Lie On This So My Solicitor Gave Me A Copy Which I Faxed And Posted Thru To Csa Just To Make Sure They Got It.$7,500 In Arrears.i Get $40.00 A F/n Extra In Arrears So Because Of This I Now Have Been Over Paid Parenting Payment.s.o.b Has Been Auditored To Do His Tax And Apparently I'll Be Recieving The Balance After He Pays Any Fines He'll Get From Having Not Done His Tax.sounds Good?i Dont Think So.i'll Then Get A Total Of Centrelink Overpayments.every Tax Year I Cringe.im On The Disbursement Method So If Maintenance Comes In My Pps Is Adjusted Accordingly.yet Every Year I Get An Overpayment.by The Way Ex Hubby Has Just Spent 3 Weeks In Cairns On A Fishing Expedition.poor *******!my Kids Would Love Just A Weekend Away And Their Father Goes For 3 Weeks.that Was His 3rd Holiday Since We Split.he Sees The Boys For Half Of The Xmas Hols But Usually Drops Them Off Early Because Their A Handful.i Wonder Why.if He Paid More Attention To Them They'd Want To Go More Often.hes Supposed To Ph Them 3 Times A Week Its Usually Once Every 3 Weeks.i Know My Boys Are Mums Boys And I Never Put Their Dad Down In Front Of Them But One Day They'll Realise What Their Dads All About.csa Has Stuffed Me Around So Many Times That I Think Why Bother.they Arent Here To Help Single Parents.my Ex Partner Who Pays C/s For Our Twins But Has A Huge Debt As Well Was Just Asked To Attend A Csa Meeting In Sydney To Talk About Unfairness To Fathers.he Was Paid $50 To Attend.thats The Only Reason He Went.why Couldnt Csa Give That Cash To Me.and Hes On Their Ph List For Other Meetings Which He'll Be Paid For Too.so Really Who Is Csa Helping The Cheating Fathers Or The The Struggling Mums?

[Disgruntled single mum]

I totally hear ya! That also happened to me, he hadnt put in a tax return for years and once he did it all went in fines, which is money that I was expecting to repay the arrears!
I cant believe that about the $50 paid for that meeting! ARGH! makes me so mad! The system could be made so much simpler!
It STINKS!

[kamckellar]

Every Time I Contact Csa I Never Get The Same Person.i Get A Different Answer To The Same Questions I Ask.its Obviously Run By People Who Dont Have Kids.

[Disgruntled single mum]

yeh same, and we are meant to be assigned a "case worker" HAHA!
I am studying social work and will graduate at the end of this year so I cant wait til I am actually working to maybe make a few changes to the system , well try anyway!
there as just been a federal task force into the child support agency but I think that due to all the vigilante mens groups a lot of what they have to say will be taken in to account!
all us single mums are just being made to go out and work!

[kamckellar]

I Only Stopped Working As My Family Daycare Mum Had A Baby.so I Went Back Onto Maternity Leave Sort Of.now Ive Got All My Kids In School And Daycare I Cant Get A Bloody Job.every Time I Ring Up About A Job They Say Tell Me A Little About Yourself,i Say Im A Single Mum Of 4 Kids And They Say Oh Look I Really Dont Think This Job Would Be Right For You.so How Can I Get A Job When No One Will Employ Me Cause I Have Kids?im Thinking Of Becoming A Daycare Mum Myself.i Own My Home And Ive Got The Room.ive Enquired And They Arent Putting Any Mums On Til November. So Ive Booked In To Do My First Aid Again.i Cant See Myself Doing Anything Else.and At Least I Get To Stay Home With My Kids.i Love Kids I Wouldnt Have So Many Otherwise.whats A Few More To Look After?

[Disgruntled single mum]

all these changes to the budget means that single mums are going to be forced to work a minimum of 15 hrs per week!
There is going to be a need for more family day care people, cos I know for me, (I am ok at the moment cos my son attends full time child care) but once he starts school I can only get him into after school care 2 afternoons a week! What job am I going to get that is flexible enough that I can pick up my son 3 afternoons a week before 3pm?
If you want my email address it kylie75@dodo.com.au, might be easier!

[kailensmum]

Just to add injury to insult. My ex is also a "self-employed" subby, only works when he can be bothered and only if it's 1/2hr away from where he lives. Last time I spoke to him (about 3months ago) he said he didn't have much work, that's cos you're lazy you moron! But the point of all this is CSA quite honestly told me they had buckleys chance of getting any coin off him because of him being "self-employed". And I honestly believe that he tries to work as little as possible, so he hasn't got enough to pay to support his son. I suppose what else can i expect from someone who asked me to terminate the preg because he wanted to restore a car! Get a life jerk, grow up and be responsible for what you helped to create. Once again i'm not insulting all of the dads who do the right thing. I know that there are good fellas out there, I simply had to much faith in this one. Anyone know any responsible, single fellas??!!! I know you're out there...but where do I find you??!!
Seeya :D

[kamckellar]

as the saying goes all the good men are either married or gay!ive got the most beautiful gay friend and if he were straight look out.arent you glad you decided to keep your bub instead of doing up the car?some men are so blind to a womans feelings.id rather be alone and happy then with someone and unhappy.keep strong :)

[Disgruntled single mum]

did you know that you can actually file a request with CSA that he pay child support according to his "capacity to earn"......it may be worth you looking into it with the CSA or Child Support Unit through Legal Aid, they can help you lodge the forms!

[Disgruntled single mum]

the last post was directed towards Kailens mum

[kailensmum]

Yeah, they've done all the assesment and that, but they basically said not to hold my breath waiting for anything from him. Can't win either way. And legal aid basically didn't want to do anything unless i tried to reconcile with him first. Been there, done that, life's beeter now

[mumof2girls]

Not sure if this will be of any help but I have a friend that was in a similar position a couple of years ago with her hubby and she was get no help from him etc. In the end she said that if he signed his rights away as a parent then he wouldn't have to pay anything anymore or have to deal with her or her son. He did this and she was so much better off financially and was able to complete her studies.

She has remained in contact with her ex (contact info only) and still tells her son about him so when he is older and wants to get in touch then he can. Not sure if this is an option for you or not but I know it worked for her
All the best!

Kay

[roxanne22]

hey im in a similar situation i look after my daughter full time her dad comes and pleases when he feels like it which isnt very often he will go for months and months with out seeing her as far as child support goes i belive hes ripping off the system big time he works fulltime and all i recieve in childsupport is 27 dollars a month

[jess_live_die]

hey im in a similar situation i look after my daughter full time her dad comes and pleases when he feels like it which isnt very often he will go for months and months with out seeing her as far as child support goes i belive hes ripping off the system big time he works fulltime and all i recieve in childsupport is 27 dollars a month

hey roxy :wave:
im like that with diannes dad to i dnt get nothing from him coz they cnt make him pay he neva does taxs and gets paid cash in hand it just sux its unfair. we have to look after the babies and pay everything they get more then us and dnt leve nothing for the kids.

[roxanne22]

<so true damn ******** wish there was more we could do we are getting screwed

[ashleerose]

Well i have some good news for people that are in a similar situation to myself.

My ex and i were married we had two children because i had no other option other than to flee with the kids (ie domestic violence) we broke up.

Prior to our relationship he had had a child with another girl.

Within a week of me leaving he hooked up with the
thing up the road from him and she of course saw $$$$ and has since had a baby.

They are both rorting the system, she is on the pension (for her first child and now second child) and getting childsupport from the first childs father and from my ex (yes they are a couple but not for centerlink purposes) he is on the dole.

He rents out his houso house (on a room by room basis) and lives with her.

Now its something like $26.00 a month that he pays for all four of his children (at the moment i get around six dollars a fortnight for two children).

I rang CSA yesterday and next year my ex will have to pay his first ex $26.00 a month, me $26.00 a month and the thing $26.00 a month (and i cant hardly wait) hehehe.

Meanwhile i am studying, working in retail on a casual basis and subcontracting for an advertising firm trying to keep everything afloat.

Because of the changes that are being introduced i am going to have to get at least another eight hours a week work (as retail job in quiet season only four hours a week, subcontracting three hours a week)...

What does my ex have to do,,,,, nothing sit back and wait for that ever reliable dole check .....

[pegasus]

Just wanted to say to Disgruntled Single Mum, that the changes that are set to occur from July this year (and then from July next year). They are all the new csa change of legislation that started July last year and will be finalised by July 2008, mean that FTB will no longer be claimable by the non-residential parent.

This is because the non-residential parent will be able to cut the amount of maintenance payable if he (in most cases) has the child more than (?12.5%) of the time when before it was more than 33% of the time.

So I understand that at the moment it is really skewed the wrong way, hopefully it will sort out with the new changes. Check out the CSA website (if you want the link I'll post it).

*might go back and check when it happens for myself*

[mumoftwoboys2005]

Hi,

I had a look on the CSA website the other day and rang up to ask for a copy of the fact sheets. Should arrive within 5-10 working days the lady said.

My DH pays Child Support for his 10 year old son from a previous relationship (he hasn't seen this child in 8 years - but that's an entirely different problem) We pay $150 per fortnight but she wants more money.

The ladies that say they don't have a Case Manager, do you put in your reference number when you call CSA? Not meaning to pry but when I started doing that I found that I did have a Case Manager, who even though she is on phones for the day, rings me before she goes home at night. Next time you are talking to CSA (I understand about the "different person every time" - it happened to me too) ask them if you could have the contact details for your Case Manager. I have mine's Direct Phone Number now.

It's worth a try. I am really sorry you guys are getting mucked around by exes. :hugs: :hugs: :hugs: to you all.

[sarmelie]

Every Time I Contact Csa I Never Get The Same Person.i Get A Different Answer To The Same Questions I Ask.its Obviously Run By People Who Dont Have Kids.

It must be! They just don't seem to try hard enough
They can't even seem to find my ex on the planet! I don't know wether it's because they dont have the power too or they just can't be arsed. but it can't be that hard to find someone in brisbane ? (maybe so).
I think they need to be given more power to go down more avenues to find the sods.
:fingerscrossed: