Do you bring up circumsicion with a pregnant friend??

[Sheer Bliss]

A friend of mine is pregnant, she is a pretty close friend, and i know her sister (who she seeks advice from on most things) had her 2 boys circumcised, and she passed a drs card onto another mutual friend who had their boy done. I am not 100% sure of her view of it, but have a feeling she is all for it. I am not a big supporter - our boy is not done. I don't have issues with people having it done if they have researched it & have their real reasons (ie not just so he can be like his dad) for doing it. I DO have issues with people doing it when they are uninformed, and are just doing it because their partner/brother/nephew is done, and 'that's just what you do isn't it'. My aunty had her first son done as her husband wanted it - she refused with her second & third son, and really regrets having the first done - I don't like to see this happen to people, and don't want this to happen to my friend.

Would it be rude of me to make sure some links/brochures with info (both sides - it's all about an INFORMED choice - either way) were brought to her attention? I don't want to seem pushy, but when a baby is born, there is so much going on in your life, you don't really need any extra stress then, so is now when they have heaps of time to think about it a good time?

I do want input from both sides of the fence - if you didn't know much about it would you want someone to give you this info while pregnant? Would you feel they were pushing their ideas onto you? Did you have your son done & wish you had made a more informed choice? TIA

[veve]

I would have had no issues with it myself (I was PRO circ .. till I read on bubhub ... then had a boy myself .. now I cant imagine going through with it) ...

I know that I wouldn't ahve known about cloth nappies .. unless someone presented me with the information .. so as long as you aren't pushy .. or preachy (sp?) I dont see the issue ..

xx
JEn

[OneBabyBoy]

I agree, as long as it's presented in an impartial way and not pushy at all then I think the information would be appreciated. Every mother likes to be educated about the choices she makes for her children.

[mum2derekandmia]

If she is as close a friend as you say she is then I think she would value your input dispite which ever view you took! I feel that my true friends are the ones willing to go out there for me and point out the things I may not have noticed or the things I may be entering into uninformed about. Thats what makes a great friend.

[Ange&Seth]

If she is as close a friend as you say she is then I think she would value your input dispite which ever view you took! I feel that my true friends are the ones willing to go out there for me and point out the things I may not have noticed or the things I may be entering into uninformed about. Thats what makes a great friend.

I agree with this. I'm not for or against circ, I believe it's a choice every parent makes for their son, which they feel to be in the BEST INTERESTS of the child.

Having said that though, I'm not sure how I'd react to having that information given to me by a friend. It wasn't something that was discussed between me and my friends, it was just between DP and I.

Hmmm, I think perhaps if you could get some pamphlets and maybe just preface it with 'hey, I saw these the other day and thought maybe you might like to have a read?' maybe even throw in some about breastfeeding AND formula feeding, vaxing, baby massage etc. I mean, it might not seem so push if it was given with a few other topics. Not too much of course, cos it might just get thrown in a heap if it's too much.

Ok rambling now :o good luck with it.

[xkwzit]

Maybe go a bit gently...instead of giving her a mass of info, encourage her to do her own research. Mention that you know of ppl who didn't think about it very much, but now regret having it done.

That way, it's a bit less confrontational, it's not like you are pushing your agenda (unless that agenda is only to have her make an informed decision). If she has trouble, you can always help her out with that research too.

[SilverStarfish]

Personally, no, I wouldn't - but that's just me.

My friends know how I feel about circumcision. I feel I have no more right to try and change their minds (how ever gently, politely, casually etc they I might like to do it) than the do to change mine.

Even though I'd like to tell them, it's not my place. If they want information for the 'side of the fence' I'm on, they know they could ask me.

[OscarTheGrouch]

Never. Most of friends have circumcised their sons so I don't go in to it. Too busy talking about the interior design of the nursery ...etc...:p

[circangel]

You should be able to discuss it!! The decision to circumcise need not be rushed in many cases, although it is best done at an earlier age it can be done by some Dr's upto the age of 12 yrs and I am presuming without the boys consent. I am not sure why anyone would wait that long but I guess it is necessary in some cases.