my 3yo has started backchatting

[bwtit]

Hi my 3yo has started backchatting his mother and I when he is being disciplined. A typical example goes like this

Me: If you keep throwing your toys on the floor I will take them of you

Him: If you do that I will take them of you

Then no matter what I say it continues with a similar reply. The end result is me taking him to his room for time to reflect. This ends in tears and screams with finally an apology.
What I would like to do is nip it in the bud before it goes too far.

Has anyone else had similiar issues and did they find something that worked better or am I expecting too much?

Thanks,

[Fuchsia!]

i found that when jax was doing it to me he was after a bite so i ignored and jsut gave him a filthy look, seemed to work. Until he now!! He has started again! Sometimes kids go through phases and i think he's just testing you to see how far he can take you! You should tell him that you don't like the way he is talking to you and it makes you feel upset/sad. This makes him realise that he is hurting your feelings and then its up to him if he wants to keep hurting your feelings or not. Hopefully not! Goodluck! Hopefully it will pass:thumbsup:

[forbetoel]

Join the club :rolleyes: everyone talks about the "terrible two's" what about the "3 year old attitude?"

[~Emmylou~]

Watching with interest...this has just started here in the last couple of weeks.


She's also taken to screaming NOOOO! And marching straight up to me with a defiant look on her face and hitting me. Soooooo not on!

I'm so looking forward to the threes...NOT.

[sweetsugardumplin']

bwtit - I think your response to the back chatting is ideal (My DS is doing exactly the same - everything is a battle) I just think it's really important to be consistant and pretty soon they get the message that it's not okay to behave this way..............if you keep changing your tactic, they will become confused about the inconsistancies. You could always try the one, two, three approach...........it gives the child a chance to redeem themselves

[nickalex]

Welcome to my world. Ours usually centres around her wanting to do what she wants regardless of what I have said. So I say "No, Georgia we don't have time to play on the swing set we have to pick up daddy blah blah blah". She runs up the back saying "well I say yes!!!". Totally defiant and fiesty. Problem is her daddy thinks it's cute and says we should be encouraging her to express herself. I say sure but not when she is disrespecting her parents or when it effects the day to day running of the house.
The way I deal with the defiance is just to stand my ground and never back down with a lame ok you can have 5 minutes etc etc.
As for other back chatting, It's time out and an apology which seems to be getting us somewhere. As she gets older we are also trying to get her to empathise about how she can affect other peoples feelings.

[nemosmum]

grrrr I hate the back chat its one thing to voice your opinon BUT to talk back is R U D E

I have a zero tolerance policy on this and thankfully I found something that worked with my son

Now when he starts to talk back I say
"Just say yes mum" and give him the OR ELSE stare hahahaha

and he says "yes mum" even though i can tell his itchy to say something else hahaha

dont know how long it will last but its working so far

and yeah the OR ELSE is time out in his room

all the best with it