View Full Version : GA c/section
I just want to write this down and get it out,i feel so sad about having to have a general anasthaetic for my c section and missing out on the first hours of my sons life...his heart rate dropped so low they just had to get him out and i know the main thing is he is now safe and sound...but i just feel so sad and teary,i feel disconnected from everyone and very insecure.Its probably just the lack of sleep...anyway just wanted to get that out
Oh Ally :hugs: :hugs:
I know exactly how you feel. I also had to be put under a ga and to this day it still hurts. i mean having a c-section is never nice, especially emergency ones, but for us few who have had to gone under, i think we will always carry that pain.
to not be able to share the experience with our partners, not not hear that first cry, to not remember your first cuddle or even remember the first time you breastfed... nothing can give it back to us. all i know is that i look at photos from the labour and i guess that helps some what. i also did some counseling but it didn't help a whole deal.
i think the only way we get to deal with it is if we talk to each. unless you've been there you dont understand. please do be careful though, my guilt/anger over the 'birth' turned into pnd - so make sure you do talk to some if you think you need to. feel free to pm any time.
good luck with your healing, it takes time and thats understandable. :hugs:
Just sending you some hugs :hugs: dont know what your going through but cant imagine what it would be like to not get to see bubs first up etc....here everything as shea said
:hugs: kisses to you.
take care of yourself and your bubba.
Honey, what a traumatic experience for you. Its OK to feel sad and teary. Dont discount it as being silly! You are allowed to feel this way, honey, Im sorry that you went though that! :hugs:
It is sad, and you have every normal feeling to feel utterly disappointed. There are many of us here who understand what it's like for things to go very differently to what we had expected so I encourage you to talk when you're ready. Good luck and take care of yourself:hugs:
HI Firstly big hugs for you. :hugs: From what i read in your birth story it was neccessary. At the end of the day you and your son are both doing well and that is the most important thing I know a GA is not ideal but sometimes things just don't go to plan. So take if easy and enjoy every moment with you new gorgeous baby. :hugs: :hugs:
I know exacty how you feel. I had to go through it with my son and have no choice but to go through it again with our second baby because I have a bleeding disorder and it's the safest way. I have so many friends who've either delivered naturally or by c/s with an epidural. I also tend to feel bad and left out when they discuss what the whole process was like because I don't remember a thing and have nothing to share with them. It's awful and very hard not to dwell on because it's such a precious time. Only mum's who have been through it can ever truly understand what it's really like.:hugs:
Hi Ally Jane,
I totally understand how you are feeling. I also needed to have a GA after trying with out DD. She is now 5 months old and not a day goes by when I don't think about the birth experience and how it never went to plan, but I must admit, although I still think about it, I am able to deal with it a little better. I did do some counselling, but didn't really help as unless you have been through it, I don't think you realise the full impact it has on a mother.
I agree with Shea, please be so careful, I did end up with PND because I didn't talk to others about it.
I am here if you wanted to talk about it just pm me or if you just want to get some feelings out on paper. I actually did this and I felt much better.
Lots of :hugs:
Hi Ally, I too know the pain you're going through. I had to be put under a GA aswell (for the stupid reason that the epi didn't work :mad: )
I know it's easy to say that you did the right thing so that you and your bubs were safe, but it doesn't make it any easier.
Just make sure you talk to someone about it if it really gets you down *hugs*
Thanks ladies,nice to know im not alone...Im still very sad about the experience but overall am feeling better about things in general and not so teary etc....Thanks for your kind words
I'm sorry you had to experience it too.MY #2 dd was delivered by GA C-section.I know the sadness. I know that nothing can bring back what we missed but I've been thinking of making a special keepsake photo-album and make the most of all the newborn photos that I do have. It might be a good therapy for mums that have gone through this.
Lots of cuddles for you:hugs: ... i had an emergency C-section.
:hugs: Ally i had the same thing with my son. I had an emergancy c-sec and then after they pulled Matthew out the epidural stopped working entirely, so they started giving me morphine injections but i was still screeming so they had to put me under a general. It was 5 hours until i got to see my son for the first time, and even then i hardly remember it. What i do remember though is being in recovery and desperatly trying to stay awake (groggy), and i kept saying to the nurses 'can i be taken to my room so i can see my son and husband?' and they would say 'sure honey someone is coming soon to take you' but i think they have to say that. There were no clocks so i didn't know the time, but when the sun started to go down i started to get upset. I still cry about this all the time, my husband can't understand. :hair: I think it is one of those things you can't get over. But fortunately it happens to a lot of women, so there are many people with a sympathetic shoulder!
I too had an emergency c-section after 12 hours of non progressive labour and the doctor telling me i would have a sick baby if i didn't have one and just caught a glimpse of my son before they put me under due to extreme pain and my body going into shock,i was out for about 4-5 hours before i woke to see my partner which at the time told me to rest up and that our boy was ok.I was in and out of consciousness all night and then in the morning i found out that my boy had taken a turn for the worse and needed to be rushed to another hospital.After all that i now have a severely disabled child and if i knew that i would have told them not to put me under and dealt with the pain.So i guess i wouldn't have minded being put under if my child was in perfect health.So i can understand how you must of felt.
I also understand how you feel :hugs:
I was told i needed an emergancy c-section due to DS's heart rate sky rocketing to 210bpm :eek: and they incerted the epidural only to find it wasn't working and so they gave me a spinal and it didn't work so they tried another 4 times with still no luck so the last resort was for me to be put under a GA and i remember the last thing i saw while falling asleep was my poor DF crying his eyes out :crying: It was and still to this day is heartbreaking.
Now what was worse is the feeling i had when i eventually woke up because at our scan we were told we were having a girl and waking up being told we had a boy i had horrible thoughts going through my head wondering if DS was really mine :( The whole thing just seems so unrealistic to me.
It still stays in my mind all the time and it will for a very long time.
I feel for you hun. you have every right to feel the way you do :kiss: :hugs:
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