When Partner knows best

[iknowu2o]

I am a mother of a 11 week old, who is starting to feel a little lost. My partner answer to our baby crying is that its hungry, so he will go and make her large bottles.

This in turn is making her not want to have breast because she is constantly full and its to easy to have a bottle. So my milk is nearly all gone as expressing is not doing it for me any more (10ml).

I have tried to talk to him about it but it doesn't seem to be sinking in and now I at the stage where I feel depressed and don't want anything to do with bubs as apparently I don't know what she wants.

When he goes to work I try and only feed her breast but she is not interested, after 5 minutes bubs ends up just playing with me and crying. I not the type of person who can easily amight that they are having problems but I just don't know what to do.:gloomy:

[Lastcenturymum]

Oh crumbs! Whatever happened to 'mother knows best?' Is he of ethnic background, with his mum telling him the 'fill em up' line?

i feel sorry for you, especially if you want to breastfed, you are really up against it. Unless you want a full on argument which you probably don't have the energy for. why do you have the forumla in the house anyway? that only encourages him to do it. Get rid of it and lots of short frequent feeds will build up your milk.

Can't he understand it's something you really want to do and is your prefered option?

[RachnEllie]

I feel really bad for you. It's horrible when your partner doesn't listen to you. Please don't feel like you don't know your baby- she needs you and you are the person who knows her best no matter what anyone else says.
I expect that the stress of the whole situation is probably affecting your milk supply too and maybe your let-down isn't happening quickly enough as a result. She is probably then getting fed-up and frustrated because the milk isn't there as quickly as a bottle.
I hope you persevere and try to relax as much as you can. I know what it's like to feel as though you aren't providing enough for your baby and the expressing isn't going well.
The trouble is as well that if he's over-feeding her with bottles every time she cries, it could be causing a follow-on effect because she's over-full and has tummy ache.
You may just have to bite the bullet and be strong- tell him that you know what you are doing and he cannot give her a bottle when you are trying your best to breast feed. He is undermining you and your confidence and it's not on. I know it's easy for me to say but you need to do what's ultimately best for your baby and you! You don't want to look back and regret anything you did when your baby was young.
Make sure you get help if you think PND is setting in too. :hugs:

[reAllytee]

Sounds like you have to have a really good chat with him about this.

Tell him how you are feeling etc & then also try to get him to even look up all the benefits of bf online so he can see it for himself.

I also agree with Lastcenturymum toss the formula ! This only encourages its use !