Child Support Payments

[Gribel]

Hi all

just wondering if any one had any issues with the father NOT paying Child Support on time. My son father was supposed to pay Child Support on the 7th and still no money has been received. Also, he has to backpay me for 10 months and I called CSA and they told me that they had no arrangement with him, which in plain english means he didn't call in and so they assume that he will pay everything on one go. But as I said, no $$$ received yet.
I'm wondering what's going to happen next, when CSA follows up with him by the 15th.......I am getting all payments made thru CSA cause I knew he would pull something like that. AND to make the situation even more complex,we are working together so it's hard for me not to say anything.


Any advice???:o


Cheers
Belinda

[Shazbutt]

My hubby pays child support for his first 2 daughters, adn a few years back when i was first with him, he didn't pay for a while (due to not earning enough (he's self employed)).... and they froze his bank accounts without telling him. SO if your ex owes too much, thats what they'll probably do, until he talks to them to organise a payment plan or similar...i think...:confused: Don't quote me on that though....

[the_queen]

My DH and I were separated for 18 months, and in the first 3 months he refused to pay any child support. CSA said they'd give him a few chances to do the right thing, then after that we could take further action. So I gave CSA the name and phone number of his work, and starting from the fourth month, his pay packet was "garnished" (ie his boss gave the child support money to CSA) every fortnight and I was paid once a month. DH didn't like it, but oh well, he should have paid his bl**dy child support!!!


I'll just add, as I understand CSA, they won't jump up and down about his non-payment unless you are jumping up and down about it. I literally could not live on what Centrelink paid me (I got a pittance from them, because I was entitled to so much child support) so I was on the phone to our CSA case worker every week.

[DB&O]

Surely your ex realises that the money is for your son, shouldn't that make a difference to him? The money is so that you can provide for your sons needs, maybe you could gently let him know that again, maybe he will see sense. Good luck Belinda.:)

[cosmic]

yep, that's my understanding too. My ex had to pay and they took it straight from his wages.

Should be easy for you given you know all his employer's details!!! :D

[onabreak]

Child support never chases my husband for money for his son from a previous relationship. He only has to pay her $5.71 a week, which is nothing really. He never pays it, they send us a letter stating how much we owe, he still doesn't pay it and CSA do nothing about it. Just shows you how much the system works. Husband absolutely hates his ex and wants her to have none of his money so he would rather spend the money on him when we have him.

[mumoftwoboys2005]

We pay $125 per week for a 9 year old boy that I have never seen. His father hasn't seen him since he was 2 (and this is not for lack of trying) We have been to see about getting shared custody, but she won't appear in court or at a mediator because she still lives at home (never moved out) and her mother said that if she shares custody with us, she will be kicked out. I have done everything I can to make her welcome, including sending her a letter if we change contact details i.e Mobile phone, email or moving house etc. Not once have I been acknowledged. She hates me because I caught her swearing and abusing my husband on the phone one night at the bowling alley and I told her to shut her mouth because I knew where she lived. Not exactly an adult reply but I could not help myself. I know that she uses the money that we pay to go to Bingo 3-4 times per week and she smokes and drinks. But please before anyone says anything about my last comment, I really don't care if she smokes or drinks but she shouldn't go around boasting to my sisters in law that she is using the money that I am paying to help bring up this child.

I am really sorry if I have offended anyone. I didn't mean to. I am at my wits end with this girl (can't call her a woman even if she is 32) It makes me cry that my eldest son knows he has a big brother but his mother won't let them meet. :( :(

P.s Sorry if I rambled too much. None of my friends have dealings with things like this so I have to keep it all to myself till it gets too much.

[Shazbutt]

Joanne, i just want to say that i know exactly what you're talking about. Our story is so much the same...i want our girls to know their 2 big sisters but 'she' won't even acknowledge that they ARE their sisters.....:mad: I send photos and stuff, as well as all their b-day pressies, but who knows if they actually get them....ever want to talk, let me know....

Sorry Belinda for hijacking your thread for a tic....:o

[pegasus]

My understanding is that CSA will chase any father once they receive a tax return. I know it's a bit far away at the moment Belinda, but my suggestion would be in the meantime to do as others suggest and jump up and down so that they will go direct to his employer or bank accounts. If your agreement is through CSA then they should have his bank account. As far as I've heard, the only way fathers get out of paying (or just paying the minimum when they should be paying more is to be self employed and creative, or not to put in tax returns).

My DH has an agreement that CSA tells him how much his ex is entitled to, but I pay her the money every fortnight, rather than CSA taking the money. This is so that CSA doesn't know our bank account details and can't just take the money out (they are joint accounts - and this wouldn't be fair to me or DS), and I've heard a lot of stories about money being taken before any mediation etc occurs, we have had situations before when my DH has had a pay cut (to move interstate to spend more time with the kids), but they wouldn't reduce the payments until 4months down the track till they'd sent all of our details to his ex and got her to agree to it:rolleyes: - so I'd rather have some hold over when the money goes. If we weren't doing the right thing then my DH's ex would have to ask CSA to collect the money themselves to pay her, which they have said they would on her request. So the answer is if you are getting NAP (Non Agency Payments) and he's not paying, get CSA to collect, it's up to him to do the right thing. I may not agree with the current payment structure (which means DS and I would be financially better off if I left DH:eek:) , but I do agree with people not taking responsibility being held accountable.

[Gribel]

Hi All

thank you all for your replies, in a sad way it's good to know that we are not a minority in dealing with these issues.
Yes, CSA is collecting from him, and I guess since this is supposed to be his first payment I should be cutting him some slack - NOT - I just didn't want this to be another issue to follow up with him. Since he is not interested at all in seeing his boy - although I regularly take him into work so he can catch a glance at him - it guess it would be a waste of effort to gently remind him that he's overdue.(Last time he heard that word he kinda freaked out a bit....hehe):eek:
It's a bit far off with "Support the System that Supports you" when you have to give the System a kick in the butt to get things into gear. Hell, it's hard enough chasing my little one, why do we have to chase them up to chase the payee's for money? May aswell join the circus......:D
Luckily I don't rely on the Child Support Money, but I feel for all you ladies out there who do. It can be/ is very tough and especially when you have stuff like this thrown your way.....

Hope all is good :)

Belinda :p

[H&B'sMum]

I know for a fact that a lot of govt agencies such as tax, CSA, Centrelink even immigration are all linked, so they can all find out bank and personal details about you if you are in one any of those and more systems.

CSA disbursed their clients Child Support money through the reserve bank so if you have a bank account anywhere in Aust then the reserve bank and therefore CSA have access to it.

To the OP, keep ringing your CSA officer and keep explaining your situation but sometimes there is just nothing they can do. They do work very hard at trying to help as many families as possible, but sometimes, because of legislation, their hands are tied.

[mumoftwoboys2005]

Our Child support goes up each year because DH has been getting "further up the food chain" if you can understand what I mean in that he doesn't really work for anyone else now, he runs this truck/business himself. We could go the creative way and pay half his wages to me so that she would get a lot less than what she does now, but this means I would lose my healthcare card for my son (not that it does much good - $140 for 28 tablets that aren't covered by PBS) but anyway I will get back on track. A few years back, we were having a hard time making ends meet whilst still paying (at that time we were paying $110 per week) so I rang the CSA to ask what could be done. They sent me out a Financial Hardship Pack which basically asked me where every cent of our money went each week and the one question that really made me cry was "How much money do you have in your pocket at this moment" Then it went on to ask how much was in my wallet and any money boxes in the house. :( :( While I understand that our obligation is there to help pay to bring up this child, I don't think it is anyones business how much money I have in my purse or in my money box. While I am sitting here reading what I have just typed, I am crying with the embarassment all over again. :( :(

[onabreak]

As far as I've heard, the only way fathers get out of paying (or just paying the minimum when they should be paying more is to be self employed and creative, or not to put in tax returns).



This is how my husband has it set up so his ex only gets the minimum which is $5.71/week. His accountant does it all for him on paper to get away with this.

She is a nasty person, she broke the court orders for twelve months and wouldn't let him see his son because I was on the scene and having his baby. She tried to committ him into a mental institution so he could be deemed as being an incompetent father so he could have no custody or access to his son. We took her to court and won as the judge said "how dare you deprive the father of his son for 12mths, you do this again you will go to jail".

So from then on hubby believes that she will only get the minimal payment as she will just spend it all on herself any way. If she was a nicer person towards hubby and myself he said he would give her more money. But we make up for it when he stays with us or when we have him for the day.

Please do not get angry with me that my husband does this. There is always loopholes and people will always take advantage of the system when they can. If only I could put it all down in words how complicated his ex has made our life since we have been together.

[pegasus]

Mandy - we've had lots of issues in the past. Including my husband's ex telling me to go back to work when DS was 6weeks as she wanted us to take care of DSD and we couldn't afford to fly her to see us and said, wait until school holidays when we should receive our tax returns.

We've had lots of issues with access, (which unless you have the kids more than 110 nights a year doesn't affect maintenance) and with the kids turning up without clothes etc so we've had to buy them lots of new stuff which should go between the two houses...

So just to let you know there are some of us out here who understand the inequalities of the system (especially for the second families), but all we do now is pay the money and count down the 5 and 7years till maintenance ceases. There is a lot of bitterness between my DH and his ex, but no matter how much he wants to take it out on his ex, I keep having to remind him (and me) it's not about her.

[onabreak]

Mandy - we've had lots of issues in the past. Including my husband's ex telling me to go back to work when DS was 6weeks as she wanted us to take care of DSD and we couldn't afford to fly her to see us and said, wait until school holidays when we should receive our tax returns.

We've had lots of issues with access, (which unless you have the kids more than 110 nights a year doesn't affect maintenance) and with the kids turning up without clothes etc so we've had to buy new them lots of stuff which should go between the two houses...

So just to let you know there are some of us out here who understand the inequalities of the system (especially for the second families), but all we do now is pay the money and count down the 5 and 7years till maintenance ceases. There is a lot of bitterness between my DH and his ex, but no matter how much he wants to take it out on his ex, I keep having to remind him (and me) it's not about her.


I worked it out one day that we only have access to DSS approx 90 days a year, every Sunday from 9-5pm and every third weekend of each month he stays over night from 3pm Sat to 5pm Sunday. To me this is just crap access and hubby has no influence on his sons life at all. Eventually we are going to try for more custody, but it is hard to get it to fall in the fathers favour.

I always say to DH will it always be the three of us (me, him and his ex) in this relationship. I am looking so forward to the day that DSS is old enough to decide who he wants to live with and we no longer have to send her any money.

Ex's they just cause to much disruption and complications when a poor innocent child is involved.

Apparently a new law is coming through in July that most cases will be able to apply for 50-50 custody. To me this is the way it should be.

[pegasus]

Mandy - the thing you should be looking forward to (cos I doubt they'll be able to organise the 50/50 rule - it's just not going to be workable in a lot of situations - we have a legal agreement, but if we go to pick up the kids and they're not home, or biomum says no then we can get the police to enforce the court order - not nice for the kids), anyway it's if they can pass the reforms for the child support legislation. We're lucky the kids are older now, and they choose when they want to stay (for the most part) (and for how long, so long as it doesn't interfere with school).

The new legislation means that a reduction in payments occurs before the non-custodial parent gets to the 110nights, as they acknowledge that it does cost to look after children (ie. a bedroom, food, entertainment...). The new legislation also takes into consideration the percentage of earnings of each parent. ATM if I earn more than $11000 a year, I get a reduction of any benefit I might qualify for (eg. FTB B), while DH's ex can earn up to $39000 before it affects the amount of maintenance DH pays, and my two children are worth ~$13000 of DH's wage whereas his first two children are worth more than that, as the more he earns, the greater payment to his ex, but the same buffer put aside for our family. This has meant that his ex has been able to be a SAHM whereas I haven't been. This is not what I envisaged when I thought about becoming a mum. These are just some of the changes and the other major one (more relevant to the subject of this thread) is that there would be more power given to the CSA to track parents not paying the right amount.

Sorry Belinda, didn't mean to hijack your thread, just thinking if the system was fairer (and the steps are in place for it to happen) then more men would be willing to pay the maintenance without it being something that ends up being a bargaining tool between parents.

[onabreak]

Pegasus - I agree with every thing you say. The system does need to be fairer to each parent. The government needs a wake up call cause the way it is going at the moment it is not working.

Off the topic here....my hubby was telling me that most of the male suicides in Australia is over child custody, as the men get delt the worst hand in most cases with not being able to get the access they want and the amount of child support they have to pay out each week.

Little Johnny Howard needs to have a look at this and improve the system quickly before it all gets out of hand.

[angelickaren]

hi ladies i am in the same boat i think sometimes csa well in my case my ex says all these things and they buy it so he does not pay but he pays one mth but not for 2mth but then pays for 2 and then not for 2 more but csa say he promises to pay well i am also really ****ed off due to my ex has not done a tax return for 3 yrs so his assement is on 46,790 which he earned in 2002-2003 but we are currently going throu court to sell our house which we both own and he has had to give tax stuff to me now he earns 75,990 per yr and last yr he earned 69,234 so i rang csa with this info they said you have to fill in forms and it can take up to three mths to work it out so i sent one 4mths ago but they lost it so i now have to do another one i was so un happy about it so i feel so let down by them in the end its for the kids but i think the fathers forget that

[Gribel]

Hi AngelicKaren

I know exactly what you mean. The Fathers to seem to think that the money is for us so that we can have a jolly good time. They forget the fact the WE are feeding them (and they can eat alot), CLOTH them, Nappies aint cheap either and just ongoing costs. And even IF we would spend the Maintenance Money we receive, so be it.
I always said that I didn't want anything to do with his money and it should ( and does) go into a spereate account for my son Riley. BUT if I do have a financial "situation" I wont hesitate to take this money since I've been forking out money like hay the past year or so.

Anyway, coming back to my original Post, CSA DID sort out the Payments, and on top of the $428 he has to pay me each month he additionally has to pay another $238 per month (starting this month) to backpay me the $3557 he owes me f (since he dragged it out so long to pay with taking me to Court for a Paternity Test, luckily I registered with CSA when Riley was born, so now the DNA Test has been sorted out, he has to backpay :laughing: ).....

So thank you all for your advice to keep calling CSA, which i did, and it's all sorted now.
Sean still doesn't want anything to do with Riley, but that's ok, I found Peace now (ok, sounds stupid but this is how I feel now EVERYTHING has been sorted out) At least I don't have to worry about access and so on, and my son's responsibility is all left to me:thumbsup:

[Jem]

I regularly recieve letters from the CSA telling me that they have re-adjusted my Daughters Fathers ammount that he has to pay ( but do i ever see any of the $?) No!! Its also frustrating to know that his payment went from 5.00 a week to $60.00 a week.. Now that could come in very handy for a 6 year old girl, because i would put the money in an account for her to go towards her education..etc:thumbsup:
What drives me up the wall, is that i Never recieve anything! :banghead:
I think last payment was a good 2 years now.. and im almost certain he owes between $4000.00 - $7000.00 :eek:
Constant calls to CSA dont really seem to help, so ive sort of given up :o

[Lunar]

I have trouble with this issue ALL the time!
Just keep hassling CSA to keep on his back. If you hassle them enough they will keep calling him until he pays.
I am in the process of doing this right now! Got to call CSA again tomorrow (called them yesterday). I will continue to call them every second day until they hassle him enough.

[pegasus]

I really don't get how guys get out of paying the money.:eek:

If I put one dollar less than my step kid's biomum expected in her bank account (or one day less) she's on the phone abusing and threatening me and telling me how we'll never see the kids again...

I understand none of you ladies out there receiving maintenance payments seem to be vindictive like my husband's ex, but this is wher the buck has to stop! If the CSA knows your ex should be paying $60 a week instead of $5, then that's what they should be collecting. As far as I knew, if my hubby didn't pay the right amount, his ex could demand that the payments were done as agency not non agency payments and as agency payments, the csa could glean the money out of his salary or out of his bank account. We went through a difficult period last year where my husband was earning $20k less than when the support period was calculated but it took 4months for the adjustment to be made - this was due to a delay in getting the conference between his ex and him and a refusal for her to accept a lower rate in the mean time. As an end result (he was receiving $400 a fortnight less, but paying $123 a fortnight more than he was supposed to), we had to refinance our house and maxed out our credit cards as less money meant less money - we got no difference made up by Centrelink (as the mother got) and before anyone says anything, I know it's not dollar for dollar, but we get nothing to make it up.

We were told if my hubby started paying less, then his ex could request agency payments and then they would take them out of his bank account. We refused this as although we couldn't afford it at the time my hubby always tries to do the right thing by his kids (all 4). Hence why I'm back at work and envisage I will do so again fairly promptly once this one is born - we can't put our family on hold till the new reforms come into place. We're just counting down the time until the maintenance ceases for our children's sake so at least they'll still be young enough for us to be able to save for their future. At the moment there is no saving...

[Lunar]

Pegasus,
I understand totally what you are saying. But for those of us who's ex's are self employed and 'cheat' the system some what it is alot harder for CSA to do something about it. My ex is self employed and he can lie about how much he earns as alot of it is cash in hand work or alot of the money just doesn't go on the books etc. And if he doesn't pay they can't garnish it from his wage and they can't take it from his bank acount if it doesn't get there in the first place. Then IF and when he files a tax return (that's a big IF) what money he gets back (if there is any money to be returned to him) what he owes on support goes straight to me and he never see's it.

I think that this is what some are trying to get at.

There are some very good fathers out there who pay support on time and even pay more than what is stated.
But on the flip side there are many who just can't be bothered and don't pay and get away with it.
Just depends on the circumstances, everyone's is different.

[Nickster]

Can I just add something positive to this thread?

My DH has always paid the correct amount of child support for the 15 years he and his ex have been separated. In fact, for some of the times he was changing jobs, and may have been short of funds, he has continued to make sure he pays the exact amount of child support, even to the point of going without himself.

Before he met me, he even took his boys each and every weekend, fed them, entertained them and between he and his parents often bought them new clothes, as they would be dropped off with no clothes and often no shoes.

There ARE some good guys out there.:)

[LittleBoysRock]

Not to offend anybody but My Dad never paid child support to my Mum when we were growing up.

To be quite frank I think people who have a responsibilty to their children and dont pay the child support as gutless wonders. I just cant understand how anybody could do that to their own child.

Even if you hate your ex partner you have a responsibility to the child!

As you can probably tell this is a sensitive issue with me. I saw my Mum struggle with $$ to support us while Dad earnt over $100, 000 a year!! :banghead: :banghead: :banghead: :banghead:

[Lunar]

Before this thread gets over heated I would just like to say that I think everyone can agree that there are good AND bad fathers out there.

It would be nice if all would take responsibility but not all do.
We just have to deal with our own situations as best we can.

'Good on you' all the fathers who actually care about their children and pay support and see them.

To those who don't.... well we all know whta they can do....

[Gribel]

Hi Girls

yes, I think we all agree that there are different sort of men out there, but sometimes it seems that we get stucked with the wrong ones!!!!!!:banghead:
I have high respect for the fathers who DO pay, and deeing how much of my sons father's pay goes toward Child Support (including back payment) I know that he too will struggle at some point. The sad thing is that even though he has to pay Child Support he still refuses to see my son. Believe me, if he would have wanted access to see Riley, I would even encourage that, but he just doesn't care. We had a fight today about him not signing the Birth Certificate, and it made me realize that he really doesn't care.

ANYWAY, I guess we all have to deal with the situations that we get handed, in a way I am glad that I was a single Mum right from the start, just reading what you all go thru with access and payments :thumbsdown: I admire all you Mum's who go thru a seperation after Bub's birth, not sure how I would have coped that way.

[mick199]

i dont know if you have had any luck yet but iv been talking to members of parlement abot csa and even thow it is fedral law to pay there r so many holes in there that if a dead beat perant don wont to pay they dont have to and i say perents as its the mother od my 2 sons that wont pay to get out of paying they can change jobs as soon as csa cath up with them then the taking the payment fom the bank dont work as they can change banks also they can just get on centerlink and stay there they dont have to put tere tax in in some counters if you dont pay you go to jail they need to do this here or not give centerlink to people that dont pay if you look at how many banks there r and it can take at least 3 months before csa take the payment from the bank and about the same time to take payment from there work there is a lot of time to not pay wile we have theses so called fair cs rules for those of us out there doing the right thing by our kids were all out of luck when will the pollies get off there buts and do something for our kids but i will say make as much noise as you can call the minester for child support and keep sending emails and calling them they will get sick of it and maby we will all get somewere in the end