View Full Version : Visits from my Dad (who has passed)...
Not sure if this is the right place to post this or get some feedback but here goes....
Just recently, my Mum had a night where she couldn't sleep and was tossing and turning. It was around 3am and she felt like someone had sat next to her on the bed, she got very cold and couldn't turn around to look. When I asked her if she was scared, she said that she was "freaking out" but not scared. It was like she was frozen and couldn't look. Then after around 10min of her lying there (obviously still wondering what had just happened), the same thing happened again. This time she laid there and then got up after 10 min and walked around the house to try and brush it off!
The very next day I was about to head off to do some shopping when I got the urge to go to my Dad's grave. I haven't been there for around 6 years and all of a sudden decided to take my 7mth old there to "meet" his Pop. We went and sat there for around 15min where I had a little cry and introduced him to my dad that passed away just before I turned 2.
That night my Mum called me and told me what had happened to her. I found it quite strange that she did this as she is SO skeptical about these things. Then I told her about my urge to go to the cemetary. Then she "really" freaked out!
She then told me this week, that a girl at work had given her an aura and tarot card reading (not knowing what had happened to her). The first thing that she said was that she thought my Mum was divorced but then realised that she had been widowed. Then she said "he did it with his own hands adn it was no accident"... He commited suicide which my mum knew but found it eerie that she picked this up. She then went on to tell her that he had passed but hadn't yet moved on as he was waiting for her forgiveness.
I know that my Mum has had issues with this for years as she is angry at him for leaving us and especially that he left me without a father. Mum told her what had happened a few nights before and that I went to the cemetary. She was told that he had called on me to see if I was fine with everything but knew that she wasn't. When she asked "why now is this happening?" she was told that he thought it was the right time as I now had a son and that Mum didn't need to worry about me anymore as I would always "have someone" now. She said that he won't move on until he knows that Mum has forgiven him for what he did.
I really believe in all of this stuff and it all seems to make sense to me (obviously alot more goes with this). But I was just wondering if anyone has any thoughts as to what is going on here... Really interested to find out!:confused:
reAllytee
11-02-2006, 00:27
He seems like a lost soul.
But then my family still have my Dad visit them every now & then just to "check" on them so to speak especially my Mum as he was very protective of her.
Maybe your Mum needs to seek some answers as maybe she is harbouring too much anger etc from it all & who could blame her but maybe this is a sign she needs to move on now as there is something better or greater meant to happen with her life.
Anger like fear is a very bad emotion to hold onto it will drain away at your soul.
Its time she moves on & i think your meant to help her.
rynosmum
11-02-2006, 14:21
I had two instances of the same sort of 'awake nightmare' in an old house we had.
Both times, I believed that I had woken up but was frozen and couldn't move. I felt someone in the room with me, could make out a shadow but I couldn't move or scream.
Reading your post has brought it all back now - it's a truly scary feeling.:rolleyes:
Maxs_MumMy
11-02-2006, 14:54
Late last year by dad committed sucide and these visions i have every now and again....though my dad lived in spain, so very rarely saw him but i have the visions....scary...
I thought i saw him standing in my kitchen the other night...werid..
So i understand what your mum is going thru....Werid, scary, freaking all in one.
Hope she finds peace for herself and your dad...
Angelmist♥
11-02-2006, 15:42
Hi Kye, it sounds like your Dad truly wants to move on now, and just wanted to check up on you guys:)
Your poor mother, it sounds like she's had to deal with quite alot.I have had 4 very close people to me commit suicide, and in my opinion it is very hard to forgive them (uncle, cousin, one of my best friends and an ex who I was still close to). I could not imagine if it was the father of my child.
My cousin and my ex came and visited "afterwards" and although I was still very angry,hurt and confused....I told them it was time for them to move on.Sorry but OMG I sound like a freak!Lol it's weird actually writing it down.
Maybe your mum could visit his grave and if she can't forgive him (which I can totally understand)maybe tell him that.As in "I can't forgive you for leaving us, but I do think it's time you moved on as I need to move on with my life too".
I'm sorry I really don't know, it's a very tough one.But please let us know what happens.
Kye,
I had a similar experience about 10 years ago when my father passed away. I never really knew him very well and frankly, didn't think much of him. Anyway, about 6mths after he died I saw a psychic who basically told me that my father had not passed over and that he couldnt' move on until he had my forgiveness. I instantly felt SO bad that I had caused him to be stuck but also didn't know how I could forgive him (it's easy to say, but how do you know you've really done it in your heart iykwim?). Anyway, before the end of the session, the psychic said to me.. "you've already started to forgive him" (I personally don't know how he knew that because I felt no different).
About another 3mths later I had to go back and see him again because I couldn't stand to not know if my father was still 'stuck' so it was the first question I asked. He told me that it is his job to help them cross over and that he had moved my father on after our first session.
It is my understanding that when they are stuck, they are here (somewhere anyway.. this psychic guy called it a 'dark place') all the time but when they pass over, they can still come back and forth as much as they want so they can actually still visit us.
Oh.. and just out of interest, when I was going through a really stressful time a few years after that and not sleeping much at all, I had the experience of someone sitting on the bed next to me several times. And yes, it is very, very creepy!!! I also had a total out of body experience, where I was at my ceiling looking down at myself lying in bed. Talk about scary! Of course I thought I was dead. :eek:
this sure does sound like your dad is checking up on you all!
these type of things always freak me out !
probably because i really do beleive that there still always around us in some sort of away !
i had a freaky thing happen to me in a house that i use to live in and i felt like not sure if it was dream or not that an old man came next to me in my bed !
and then walked out i told my mum and she said u have to tell them that u dont want them around and for them to go away!or go home as such and it sounds crazy!
but i kept hearing shuffles down the hallway late atnite and so did my partner we checked on the kids and it wasnt them they were fast asleep!
we moved i was so freaked out!
i hope all goes well with your mum!
andrewsmum
11-02-2006, 19:02
Wow, this is freaky! I can't believe that so many bubhubber's have had episodes like that!
Sounds eerily like the Ghost Whisperer show, which I'm a big fan! :rolleyes:
Well, if your father hasn't 'crossed over' yet and if he's waiting for your mother's forgiveness, then maybe it's time for your mother to accept the situation and although his passing may have been hard on her, she'll need to feel peace within herself for this to happen.
Thanks for your great advice guys! It is really appreciated...
I think the reason that has been so hard on Mum is that she went through quite lot leading up to the incident as he suffered from schizophrenia (which back then, there was not alot know about it all). He was in and out of psych hospitals and was taking medication, which of course he didn't like. I don't know if any of you have seen the movie with Russell Crowe called A Beautiful Mind? Well, my Mum's situation was very similar to that... And so was my Dad's (highly intelligent so therefore couldn't understand what was happening to him).
I don't want to sound like I need sympathy for my story, as I really have done some long hard thinking over the years and realised that my Dad did what he did so that we COULD have a better life. Imagine what sort of an upbringing it would have been for me? I think that I love him more, even though I never knew him, for this reason alone. It must have taken alot of courage to do what he did. This hasn't made things any easier for my Mum as obviously it was the love of her life.
Allyoo - you mentioned that hanging onto anger can make you sick... This is pretty much what I think is my Mum's problem... There's ALWAYS something wrong with her, and I believe it is because she is letting this fester inside of her and really needs to let it go.
Nara - It sound like really good advice to get her to say "I can't forgive you, but I need you to move on so that I can"... Thanks, I'll let her know.
Cosmic - Thanks for reassuring me that even though he does eventually move, that he will still be able to visit (this was something that I was worried about). I would really hate to think that he is no longer around to watch over me and my son... I've always felt him near!
On a lighter note: It's funny that the Ghost Whisperer was mentioned too as my Mum told me that she watches it all the time and the other night had to turn it over as she was freaking out... LOL!
Anyway, I'll keep you guys posted as I have been meaning to go to a medium for the past few months (funny that isn't it?).
Thanks again - you've been great!
reAllytee
11-02-2006, 23:51
I don't want to sound like I need sympathy for my story, as I really have done some long hard thinking over the years and realised that my Dad did what he did so that we COULD have a better life. Imagine what sort of an upbringing it would have been for me? I think that I love him more, even though I never knew him, for this reason alone. It must have taken alot of courage to do what he did. This hasn't made things any easier for my Mum as obviously it was the love of her life.
Allyoo - you mentioned that hanging onto anger can make you sick... This is pretty much what I think is my Mum's problem... There's ALWAYS something wrong with her, and I believe it is because she is letting this fester inside of her and really needs to let it go.
You sound like you have opened your heart as well as your mind to try to understand something that IS very hard to understand. Suicide is always difficult for those left behind but yet all the person tends to want is to make things easier for them.
Everything you have said above pretty much says to me again the your the one who is meant to help heal your mum. You dad is here for a reason of course he does need to pass over but also he is here to protect you both & i think this is what he is doing now with your mum. She really needs to heal as i think you will find her health will decline even more so if this continues.
What you have written i think is something you need to sit with her & talk about. She needs to know your not angry & to talk about it.
Cosmic - Thanks for reassuring me that even though he does eventually move, that he will still be able to visit (this was something that I was worried about). I would really hate to think that he is no longer around to watch over me and my son... I've always felt him near!
He will never leave you & will watch over you as he has done since his passing. He has probably taken it upon himself to be your guardian angel & ven double duty now that you have your son.
Good luck with it all & remember to just stop when you feel the need & im sure you will feel him beside you :)
I too really believe in spirits and people who have passed being close to us. I got a really strong feeling from your post. I think you Dad is trying to let you know that he is still part of your life, that he didn't leave because of you or your Mum and that he is still very close to both of you.
I don't believe that anything anyone does on this plane really effects those who have crossed over from moving on. I feel your Dad is more concerned that your Mum is carrying around anger and guilt and that is making her unwell. She needs to let it go and to know he is OK. Don't let her think anything she is doing is stopping him moving on, it is not the case, he can go freely, he just likes to 'touch base' with you guys.
I too have had similar experiences.
My grandfather passed away when I was 11 years old, and since then - more in my late teens and twenties - I have had him visit me. He had a wonderful aftershave that I always remember and that is how he lets me know he is there with me. I don't get freaked out. It's in no way an uncomfortable feeling or anything. I just know he's there. He has been to see me twice since my son Izak was born, so is obviously keeping an eye on things. I know he hand picked this little guy for us! :)
He usually visits when I really have a need for some guidance, even though I may not know it at the time. I wish that I had more time with him on this earthly plane so I could talk to him as an adult, it gets a bit hard to do all the talking at times. However, he always was a good listener!
On another note, I have lived in a house (on a 200+ year old sheep station) that was frequented by ghosts. My brother was pulled from his bed one night by one of these "people". He challenged them to show themselves and not be so cowardly as to attack him at night, and they never annoyed him again. Weird things happened.
Not to blow my own trumpet, but I seem to have this situation where I am very spiritually aware. I don't see auras, I don't claim to talk to the dead, however, I just seem to "know" things. Is anyone else like that? Irrespective of what I think, it seems to just be my lot in life.
kyeaj, that sounds interesting.
He will wait until she genuinely forgives him i should imagine, so it can't just be a "oh yes ok, i forgive you" it has to be from the heart.
I'm not sure what the spiritual repurcussions for suicide are (its different to each religion i suppose).
It seems like your mother was in a sub-conscious state of mind, ie, he might not have been in this realm, but your mother might have connected with him in some way.
I'm not sure what the spiritual repurcussions for suicide are (its different to each religion i suppose).
Interesting that you should say that as I've heard that if you commit suicide then you end up in limbo - not sure... He was catholic but my mother and I don' t practice any form of religion.
Funnily enough, after all of this I have felt that he is around at times (not sure if it's because I'm thinking about it though??)...
Hopefully going to a medium soon... Mum's not too keen yet but I would like to go myself just to see what's going on.
Thanks for all the replies, really appreciate it!
Blessed Mum
21-02-2006, 22:28
Kyeaj
Kust wanted to say I agree with what C2H5OH said about the forgiveness thing. I won't go into details but I know this to be very true and true forgiveness in my experience isn't something we control it takes place usually without us being aware of it. Its a moment that occurs and when I say moment it doesn't mean it happens quickly. Rambling again:rolleyes: .............:ecomcity: . *SORRY*
Thanks tara25... I agree also.
I think that all of this is actually making my Mum realise that she hasn't accepted all of this and maybe still hasn't forgiven him... Maybe this is the beginning of that long road you talk about. Time will tell I guess...
Got the number for the medium though as strange things are still happening to both of us, just need to wait until we're both free to go together. I suppose it's a good sign that she wants to go now (seeing as she is so skeptical about all of this stuff).
She actually called me the other day to tell me that she had the same thing happen to her again, although this time much stronger and that she wanted me to get the number as she felt she needed to go to find out what was going on and try to put an end to it. I still somehow feel that she needs to accept a few things first, but maybe that's why she wants to go... We'll soon see!
Ruby Slippers
09-03-2006, 00:27
:hugs: what a great story :crying: i'm sorry about your Dad , i hope you can all make peace with him leaving , it's nice to know they are around to watch over :D
Thanks ruby slippers!
I'm really okay with it all, it's my Mum who's not... She's coming over tomorrow to visit so no doubt we'll be talking about it all and seeing where she's at with it! It was really her who went through it all, not me (I just heard/knew about it growing up) and feel for her more than anything else...
LilShenanigans
09-03-2006, 01:03
Not to blow my own trumpet, but I seem to have this situation where I am very spiritually aware. I don't see auras, I don't claim to talk to the dead, however, I just seem to "know" things. Is anyone else like that? Irrespective of what I think, it seems to just be my lot in life.
Everybody has some form psychic ability, but most people push it aside as they are growing until their ability becomes weak enough that they don't notice. Others listen to that 'feeling' inside, let themselves be guided by it etc etc.
Even dreams hold some form of psychic ability so it's interesting to interprete them and see it unfold in reality.
I find it fascinating that so many people are freaked out about ghosts or generally the unknown. They all have a reason, just some are a bit more impatient about their problems lol
I love the family members who just 'pop in'. I've had my grandfather visit me twice, the most amazing one was staying at my grandmothers, sleeping in my mothers old room and absolutely sick as a dog. Something stroked my face, I said "Thank you pop" and went to sleep - later I found out that's what he used to do for my mum to calm her down when she was sick. :p
Or pets that visit. The day after I put down my gorgeous baby girl (who was 16yo) I could distinctly smell her fishy breath as if she was still asleep on my pillow lol Ok, so it wasn't pleasant but it was nice to know she was happy where she was.
But kyeaj, your father is done, he's made sure everything has worked out and he wants to leave. I doubt you need a medium but if your mother is unsure how to forgive and say goodbye, it could be a good option.
It could be an idea too if your mum just sits by herself, concentrates, gets everything off her chest (I mean all that anger and what it's for), but then let her accept that it has worked out in the end, and she should forgive him for that at least - nobody should deny that he hasn't been around for the entire time and probably helping everyone.
ahh I'll stop rambling :o Goodluck
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