am I truly alone?

[XandersMummy]

Just thought I'd post here in hopes of some encouragement. I'm normally a happy and upbeat person, but lately I just feel overwhelmed.

First a little history...

I ran away from home at 14 to avoid being forced to have an abortion. Had a baby and married the baby's father at 15. 3 kids later, husband disappears with all our money. I was a stay at home mom. We were forced to move, and I ended up never getting any child support as the ex ended up in prison.

I have since found a wonderful man, we have a 16 month old together. My 3 other children are teens now. I moved here to Australia (from the US) so my husband (an Australian) could be close to his family. My parents don't speak to me, I haven't heard from my brother in 7 years (we never even had a falling out, he just won't talk to me) I have no other siblings, no grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. I don't know anyone in Australia...

I have one son with possible mental health problems who has twice threatened to kill me because I took away his video games. I am still trying to get him help but keep hitting a wall.

Now my husband and I are having problems. I know with all my heart he loves me, but maybe with the stress of the move and the older kids, it feels like he criticizes me all the time. I feel like he's unhappy with me. I still love him and I don't feel like our marriage is in danger, I just feel so totally, completely overwhelmed and just sad, for lack of a better word.

My husband is my only emotional support, and now it seems like that is gone.

I realize that there are other people with far worse problems than my own, so I almost feel guilty to post here. I just feel so lonely and depressed...

But I know there are other Mums who understand how I feel.

Hello out there...

[saremc]

Hi

Im not too sure what i can tell you as i have not been in your situation but i can understand the depression. Sounds like you might need to go out and make some friends and if you need to see a counciler it would help unload some issues that you need to get off your chest and give your partner a break.

Other than that all i can send are :hugs: and heaps of them!

Good luck!

[warriorPRINCESSdaughter]

if i was closer (i am in QLD) i would grab my keys and take you for a cuppa, i too have no family support the last of mine died two years ago and i have raised 5 kids alone for 11 years. sucks at times i paid the rent today and have $20 left to feed us for a week. its hard but i get up everyday and thank god i live in the lucky country. but it still sucks sometimes. tell your husband these things, tell him you love him, tell him that he is a good provider and that you are blessed that he picked you. i try to look at what i have not what i dont have but sometimes i take a peek at those things that we lack but that makes me depressed. look at what is in your hand now and tell your family you love them.

hope this helps and god bless

Jodie:party:

[sunnyflower]

Wow things sound like they are def piling up for you!

It sounds like you need some help.

Have you tried joining a mothers group to meet some people?Ring the Playgroup Association to find a group in your area.

I think you need to talk to someone to get things off your chest.Relationships Australia are really good,they provide counselling for a reasonable fee.

Talk to your child health nurse or Gp,they will have details of who can help you.

I wish you luck and send you hugs.