Was being a parent much harder than you expected? [Archive]

*babygirl*

27-08-2007, 09:41 AM

yes and no...
pregnancy:
i had NO idea it would physically change EVERY aspect of my body... some goes back to normal but others dont... i had no idea about EVERYTHING that could go wrong.... and no idea i was going to have two little FEET in my vagina from 25weeks on:eek: lol:laughing:

baby life: no it isnt harder.... i was prepared for sleepless nights and screaming baby... so far i've had no sleepLESS nights and very little crying baby time....dd is the perfect asscesory hahahahahahaha but its so much easier than i had expectedf

EXECPT FOR BREASTFEEDING............. OMG PAIN PAIN PAIN....

Mummaof2

27-08-2007, 09:44 AM

Its not as hard as i expected on most days but there are always one day here and there that are much harder

I am the same....being a single mum most days are pretty good and we have a morning and evening routine each day which helps things run smoothly but yesterday was one of those hard days. Both the kids were awake at 6am and DS only had a 1hr nap all day and they were both fighting, yelling, screaming all day. No sooner had I thought they had settled down they would start again. It even got to the point where I was going to ask mum to watch them for even just 1hr so I could go and have a coffee with a friend just to have a bit of quiet time. I ended up having dinner cooked and on the table by 5:30pm then bathed them and they were both in bed by 6:30pm and it was time for me to relax. I hope I dont have another one of those days for quiet some time.

~mia&ryan~

27-08-2007, 09:53 AM

In a honesty it was much easier than I expected.. I never thought I would enjoy it so much, and feel so completely happy... I think there is no greater joy in the world...:)

jaxcoop

27-08-2007, 09:59 AM

My first bub i was fine i knew what i was going to have to deal with but when coop came along i was not prepared for it at all. Its so overwhelming some days, and some days i wonder how im going to get thhrough the day.

mum_inlove

27-08-2007, 10:10 AM

Not much harder than i thought, only for the first few weeks..But I have to agree that I found breastfeeding was a LOT harder, my nipple was literally hanging by a thread..:crying:. And I think Lloyd's age now is the testing age so i do have to have a lot more patience..But yeah its still the best job in the world..I enjoy it, too much!:thumbsup:

xxxDragonFlyxxx

27-08-2007, 10:22 AM

For me, being a mum has been much, much, much easier than I thought it would be!

I was preparing myself for the absolute worst, never sleeping, screaming baby, no time for myself etc etc etc

But luckily, DD has been a dream! Sleeping for 10 hours overnight at just 9weeks old was a blessing to my sanity, she is a great sleeper, happily sleeping long hours during the day which left me free to shower and have me time, she was easy to just do whatever I wanted to do, which was good when it came to setting in a routine.

Of course these days she has her horror moments, but on the whole, parenting has been an absolute breeze for us. However, i'm not expecting the same when #2 comes along in Janurary!!!

andrewsmum

27-08-2007, 10:24 AM

Oh yeah it's hard! Hard work, but sooo rewarding at the same time! Valentine

It's not quite what I expected it would be, yes I have good days and bad days, but overall I wouldn't change anything for the world. :yes:

Wy & Deeky

27-08-2007, 10:34 AM

OMG, harder than I expected LOL!

27-08-2007, 11:19 AM

I said "Yes", but I don't so much find it *hard*, just more demanding/full time than I had anticipated. Of course, I knew it would be a 24/7 job, but it's one of those things that you can't know how that feels until you're right in the middle of it. I still have days where I miss the carefree life I had before, but I do love being a mum and it's such a fascinating journey raising a new person into the world, lots of fun. And I love the fact that you can't be selfish as a parent, it puts things into perspective.

PrincessofGod

27-08-2007, 11:26 AM

i was a bit shocked with emily but soon got used to it, and knew what to expect with clare, they are a bit older now, still have those days, but i love it! :thumbsup:

sillysideup

27-08-2007, 11:32 AM

sunnyflower

27-08-2007, 11:36 AM

yes but i wouldn't give up being a mum for a million dollars:hugs:

neostudded

27-08-2007, 11:42 AM

I dont feel Ive been a parent long enough to answer.

Faeml

27-08-2007, 11:51 AM

For me, it was a bit of both - some parts were harder, some where easier.

There are some aspects of parenting, such as the heart wrenching sadness of seeing your baby in pain or sick, that you really and truly cannot understand until you become a parent yourself - as patronising as that can sound sometimes. It's much harder than you ever think it could be, before your kids are born.

By the same notion, there's also no way of really preparing yourself for the incredible joy and excitement that the little things bring, such as a cuddle or a smile or watching them figure out how to use a spoon :)

The rest of the stuff, the practical things like changing nappies, feeding, how-on-earth-do-I-clean-up-this-mess, the sleep deprivation... like any new skill, it's hard at first. But after a while you wonder what you were ever so stressed about!

OllieBear

27-08-2007, 12:06 PM

All I can say is OMG :eek:, I totally didn't expect it to be the way it is. The joy, the love, the pain, everything. I think I was on the phone to my mum every day asking for advice, and I don't think it got any better 2nd time around, as each baby is different. I still call her for advice, I would be totally lost without her, she's my world. I have to say that I think I'm completly clueless :confused: when it comes to babies, but I do the best I can and I LOVE EVERY MINUTE.:thumbsup:

BaDaBing

27-08-2007, 12:09 PM

Some days boy oh boy its very testing but the joy is absolutley priceless. When you look into your childs eyes and can almost cry for how much you love them is worth all of the temper tantys.

mbrbbt

27-08-2007, 12:18 PM

Definitely YES. But I think this is what I am meant to do. That's probably why I have 5 and always cry at newborns on tele etc knowing I won't ever have that again. Wouldn't change mine for the world

Beany

27-08-2007, 12:30 PM

It's not the workload that was unexpected, it was how everything else (or lack of everything else) made the workload seem that much more.

He was never a great sleeper and the constant sleep deprivation made things harder than they actually were. You don't realise just how much you need time to yourself until you can no longer go to the toilet without singing a jaunty tune to keep the wailing child in the cot from feeling like he's been abandoned. You begin to accept that and then you turn the corner into true lack of self-time: when, because he is ill and clingy, you are going to the toilet with him holding on your knees.

When they are sick, you don't sleep. They get over whatever it was that was ailing them, and because they use you as their own personal snot-rag, you get it. But you can't crawl into bed and just die because they are off pulling the knives out of the kitchen cupboard.

It is a tough gig. And I think you just can't understand quite how tough until you are there with the sleep deprivation, the hormones and the spew in your hair.

hippee

27-08-2007, 02:23 PM

Yep, harder, much harder that I ever would have thought.

HugsAndKisses

27-08-2007, 02:36 PM

Yes definately alot harder than i thought...
its so true that kids just take up so much time and energy and me being preg with number 2 and sick as with MS and Ds is still running around like a mad person still talking non stop....still throwing tantrums....its so true you cant just lay and get better there is no time really for that.....all i can say is im so blessesed to have a husband who does help...even if i do have to ask he does help me...and my mum is amazing i couldnt get through without the both of them

but that all being said and call me crazy but i do love my son more than anything and the new baby in my tummy too.....but this is a tough tough job:yes:

♥Heaven Sent♥

27-08-2007, 02:51 PM

I never expected my first baby to be so damn hard to look after and settle.

She was constantly crying,spewing,burping,farting etc.She was the most unsettled baby i had ever came across.I knew it was going to be hard but not that hard.

With ds i expected him to be the same as dd,but i got the most settled quiet and happy boy.I am so glad,all the hard work with dd must have paid off.

For the first yr of ds's life was so easy,but he is at the stage of being into everything and not listening,it doesn't help that i have a child going through the terrible two's and she seems to influence a lot.I didn't think it was going to be easy and then really hard a yr later.

I do have days when they are both really good and then other days im PULLING MY HAIR OUT :eek:

Nan

27-08-2007, 02:52 PM

Oh, undoubtedly!! It is much harder than I imagined because I didn't imagine investing so much of myself. I knew there was a measure of unselfishness, but not as much as I have!!!

Best job in the world though!!!! :D :thumbsup:

Mummy to Mason

27-08-2007, 02:53 PM

Yes, definately much harder than I expected it to be. But having said that it is sooo much more rewarding than I ever thought it would be. I wouldn't change being a Mum for the world :)

Seekrit

27-08-2007, 03:48 PM

I have a very very easy child.. I actually find being a mother a hell of a lot easier than I thought it would be. :)

anscje

27-08-2007, 03:52 PM

Yes it definately was.

I went to all my anti-natal courses etc but none of it could prepare me for the biggest changes that I felt the hardest to adapt to :

1. Sleep Deprivation - 11am was my usual getting out of bed time :eek:

2. Breastfeeding - thought it would be easy but I dried up after 2 days and he just couldn't latch on so I had to do formula :mad:

3. Being Responsible - I only ever looked after myself before DS. Then it changes from my biggest decision of the day being what to wear out to having to think about everthing from when to have a shower, have I washed all his clothes, do I need more nappies etc.

And the hardest thing of all! Believing that newborns were so easy to take care of LOL.

I thought yes they sleep all day and I will sleep when they do. DS slept for about 1 hour at a time and was up for about 5 hours with reflux, constipation and just about everything else.

It was all very overwhelming and very hard but in the end entirely worth it :smiliedance:

Natsmummy

28-08-2007, 08:43 PM

It is harder than I expected. I think I was quite realistic in my expectations but from the start DS has been a particularly demanding boy and I don't think anything can prepare you for how its going to be when you actually do it, no matter how much thought or consideration you gave to it while you were pregnant. Sleep deprivation for example - you know its going to be tough but until you experience it you don't completely understand how it really makes you feel.

tomsmum2005

28-08-2007, 10:25 PM

In a honesty it was much easier than I expected.. I never thought I would enjoy it so much, and feel so completely happy... I think there is no greater joy in the world...:)

My feelings exactly, which is why I've gone back for another.

FunkyMonkey

28-08-2007, 10:42 PM

I had my rose coloured glasses well and truly stuck on during my pregnancy. Not many of my friends have kids and DS was the first grandchild for both sides of our family, so any advise I did get, I kinda ignored.:devil6:
Not that DS was a challenging baby, he was actually pretty good. He slept pretty well, didn't have any serious problems. I just didn't realise that he would need settling CONSTANTLY during the night and he snacks (demand b/feeder) all the time, meaning he won't eat proper food, and that means he wakes up hungry requiring my bosom to be applied. Vicious circle.
That being said, we go back to bed after his dad has left for work, have a cuddle and go back to sleep for an hour or so. It's our special time, no stress just doing whatever.
I'll gladly have another just gotta convince DF. (he's changed his mind, again :hair:)

phineas

29-08-2007, 07:10 PM

Nope - being a parent has been easy for me, it's the rest of life I struggle with!

Hathor

30-08-2007, 06:16 AM

Call me pesimistic, but throughout my pregnancy I prepared myself for a demon child that wouldn't sleep, wouldn't feed and would probably scream all day :rolleyes:
He was a good baby to me though, most of the time he fed well, slept well etc etc, as he's grown he's grown to be a well behaved toddler (most of the time)

So to me parent hood has been rather easy. Having DS 2 now it has thrown a new spanner n the toolbox but so far they both treat me well.

I expected motherhood to be a lot harder than I am currently finding it. that being said if I didn't have my DP around on the tough days Im not sure I would cope.

SweetSerenity

30-08-2007, 07:43 AM

For me ... Yes it was much harder but I felt that way the first year and a half of Peters life. I suffered PND which made me hate being a mother and what came with it... So until I got over my PND and it eased down a bit, I never enjoyed being a mother.

In all honesty now though I can say I love it so much and that I rarely have days where I think it's all too hard :)

EmsMum72

30-08-2007, 07:52 AM

I voted for 'About what I was thinking', however I was nowhere near prepared for the lack of sleep. That threw me for a loop. I have never felt so tired in my life as the first 4-6 months of my daughter's life.

bel84

30-08-2007, 07:55 AM

So far definately much easier then i expected, :thumbsup:

BigGeorge

30-08-2007, 08:02 AM

I've had a little of both, so picked 'About what I was expecting'.
I really struggled for the first 6 months... I even begged Damien to take Mitch away from me, so I wouldn't do something I regret. Mitch had bad reflux, was a horrible breastfeeder, and just an unhappy bubby.
But as soon as he hit 6 months, he became a dream child. He's so placid, happy, friendly... I just adore him.
Damien and I were reading in bed last night, and Mitch was sleeping inbetween us, and I couldn't stop gazing at him with so much love. There are no words to explain my love for him.

*I might come back in 8 weeks, and answer this poll again, after bubba number 2 is born though!;) *

stellarella

30-08-2007, 08:22 AM

I said no.

I dont find it hard. Oscar fits in with our life perfectly...he is our life, it just works. I thought my life would end once I had kids and I had a bit of a panic in late pregnancy but honestly we do everything as a family now and it has only enriched our lives.

I dont find the day to day aspects of mothering hard. Things like BFing/starting solids, sleeping/settling, teething, nappies, household stuff...etc. have come really naturally but I am presented with challenges on the bigger issues like immunising.

alicesmum

30-08-2007, 09:01 AM

Yup. Having only one was not so hard. No one told me how hard having two would be!

Some days I have felt rather depressed - a feeling so alien to me before - what, with the the social isolation, the exhaustion, the hearing damage, and the feelings of incompetence when you can't stop a 2 yo from screaming and kicking or the baby from wailing.

Lucky they are so very cute, or, some days, you'd sell 'em on E-Bay I reckon!!!

bipster

30-08-2007, 10:46 AM

Initially it was much harder than I expected and life with a newborn whether its your first or your third is always hard work but now I find it to be much more like what I expected it would be.

Adelle

30-08-2007, 11:04 AM

Nothing can prepare you when you heart is constantly being tugged. Whether its the little ones misbehaving ,or getting sick or in need surgery or something. I think this is the hardest part of parent hood

melfunction

30-08-2007, 11:12 AM

With my first baby, I found the emotional side extremely difficult to adjust too. I wasn't prepared for the emotional connection with the little being Dh and I created and it completely overwhelmed me.

That is still a work in progress.

My second baby was/is a completely different story and while I didn't bond with him straight away, it took far less time than the first. I think I was much better prepared emotionally.

I wasn't afraid to seek the help and support I needed second time around.

our little treasures

30-08-2007, 04:39 PM

It has it's days where I have just been unprepared. Although I think the vision that babies just sleep was our hardest thing. We never even knew about co sleeping but now I wouldn't have it any other way:)

I must admit it's the same as we never knew we could love these lil people sooo much. Your not really totally prepared because each child is different

Cordelia

30-08-2007, 08:03 PM

Ohhhhhh i had NO IDEA what I was in for!!

I'm still reeling from aftershock, even know she's over 8 months old!! The sleep deprivation, the colic, the breastfeeding trauma... I just had no idea. My bub just fusses over EVERYTHING.

But MORE INTENSE than how hard it is is this absolute electric current of love I have for my little girl. It just makes my heart ache. I think that's the most mind blowing shock I've had since becoming a Mum - that I could feel so much for a tiny little being who makes my life such a trauma!

susiehomemaker

31-08-2007, 07:48 AM

I was expecting the worst, so reality was a pleasant suprise. DD is a full on demanding package, but still better than I expected (esp in the early days) Like most people I didnt realise just how much I would love my baby, and how much that first look and cuddle would blow me away! No one who hasnt got kids can really understand that feeling... I love being a Mum. I miss DD when she is being minded- the first hour is great but then I feel as though I am missing something. I didnt expect bfing to be so awful though- the engorgement, the mastitis- yeck. Once we changed to formula things got alot better. I hope to bf the next one though- I am better armed with info and advice now.

MissGrumpy

31-08-2007, 08:43 AM

I would have to say yes it is harder than i guessed as i didn't plan on being a single mum of 2 but as i single mum you find ways to make it easy.

crazykidz

05-09-2007, 09:31 AM

Most definitely harder than I thought it would be... the battles of a 9yr old thinking shes a teenager - very tiring emotionally and need a lot of patience. The younger two aren't a problem.

lukaelmo

05-09-2007, 09:36 AM

I think what I find hard are things I never thought about... my biggest hardship is the whole transport thing, getting two little people ready to go out, getting them in and out of the car etc... It had never occurred to me that if I just want to run into a shop it would turn into a major mission...

Apart from that, not really harder than I expected... but my kids are pretty easy...

motherhoodlmb

05-09-2007, 10:46 AM

YES
Can't say it much louder than that. I love my 2 dds and bun in the oven more than I'd ever have expected... but I didn't know what hard work was before them. I think for me a lot stems from the fact I'm an introvert and I need time on my own to reflect and recharge. Having to relearn how to find this time while sleep deprived, grumpy and with my two shadows (my 3 year old now says to me "i follow you everywhere don't i mummy') has been very hard for me. Being a mummy is a very selfless thing - and I honestly struggle with that daily. But I love my job/life at home with the girls and I am learning to get the balance right and find time to look after mummy too!

Ohmygoodness I thought I was the only one like this! I'm reading about how much people love it but I'm exactly the same - an introvert and absolutely need that time to recharge. This is the thing I struggled with the most and it is difficult to explain to people who think that once you're a mother, it's all about the children. Thankfully I my extremely extroverted older child is in prep at school now and my little bit of both 3 year old at home 3 days a week and creche 2 days and it's a lovely balance (though I have more and more work from home now so there's still not that much time to recharge!!)

I was also a very anxious person when I had my first child so didn't enjoy the first year of his life much. Shame.

OopsieDaisy

05-09-2007, 04:59 PM

Not so much the parenting thing but the sacrifices we really go through are harder than I thought but hey.. it is worth it.

AquaDevil78

05-09-2007, 05:13 PM

I ticked it is about as hard as i imagine it to be.. but then i don't really see it as hard.

The part i find annoying and maybe it is because he is only almost 6 months old is that i am STILL super paranoid about everything, when it comes to sniffles, if he happens to bang his head, when he makes funny noises blah blah .. as dp says stop being so damn paranoid you cant wrap him in cotton wool. :o

So i think it is more overwhelming at first and then every day becomes a challange, but it is rewarded with love that you just cant fathom until you are a parent, the smiles, the first sounds, the giggles, the farts the cute babbles.

Exhausting too, but no job in the world beats being a full time mum! :yelclap: This being my first i can only comment on the transition from being non parent to parents. LOL.

Like everyone else i have good days and bad, but mostly because of my own silly reasons.. im still learning and adapting so forgive me please ;)

mikaylasmummy

05-09-2007, 06:57 PM

Alot easier than I expected

squishthefrog

05-09-2007, 07:00 PM

I dnt think I had a realistic Idea I was 15 when I fel preggers

ThisIsLiving

05-09-2007, 07:04 PM

Much, much, much harder than I could ever have anticipated! I expected it to be hard-going, but I don't think anyone or anything could ever have even half-prepared me for the overwhelming responsibility that goes with having children. But I love them all to death, and could not imagine my life without them now (which is a good thing considering I am having another child in just a few weeks!). :)

05-09-2007, 08:03 PM

Much harder than i ever imagined. I did not expect PND both times, and the suicidal stuff, man that was so so so tough.

lilly

05-09-2007, 08:43 PM

I was expecting the worst, given all the horror stories people felt compelled to tell me whilst I was pregnant. I was also in two minds about being pregnant, I wasn't sure I'd done the right thing. I thought that my body would never be the same, my life was over etc. etc.

Also, people who knew me seemed to be worried how I would cope given I had always been a career driven, party gal.

Then I really began to worry how I would cope! I thought I was a sure candidate for PND.

Anyway, when DD came along, our eyes met and my instant thought was 'she'll be ok'. I knew she was a tough cookie. And we have a special connection to the point where I feel she trusts me and won't fight me when I put her down for a nap etc. I actually couldn't believe how happy I felt and how easy it all was! she is the joy of my life and I am a gazillion times happier and life is so much better. I thank God I took the plunge!

I was even super amazed by the way my body bounced back, no stretch marks, no weight issue. My breasts are only slightly softer. I have a new found respect for my body and what it is capable of (my daughter was 9 pound 8, vaginal birth).

There are days where she can be annoying but they're rare. I'm loving it and have learnt not to worry about other people's stereotypes of who would make great mother's etc.

jaydensmum

06-09-2007, 12:29 AM

When i was younger i was a live in nanny for a yr. So when i had my DS i thought this would be easy enough but i was very wrong.:yes: I honestly think no matter how much experience you have with kids its not the same as having your own. :no: Even though the job was pretty much the same the kids werent mine and so werent my full responsibilty and plus i had nights off. Parenting is not just a physically challenging job but is emotionally challenging as well. It wears you out both ways. In saying that i wouldnt change a thing and they are very much worth it! :yes:

alexiasmum

06-09-2007, 12:38 AM

Much harder than i ever imagined. I did not expect PND both times, and the suicidal stuff, man that was so so so tough.

Yes, I agree with the above quote, that it's harder than I imagined. Second time around with no PND it is hardwork. But with 1st baby I also had severe PND and that is really tough, it was hard to imagine that I would survive.

Jennifer85

06-09-2007, 12:41 AM

i have alot of niece and nephews, 21 to date (i think lol, i cant keep up). and my sister always lived with us with her daughter so i thought i kinda knew, but i had no idea, its harder than i could have ever imagined

Canuck

06-09-2007, 09:02 AM

Must admit that I'm with the other 64% and parenting was A LOT harder then I expected. I think it was compounded by the fact my hubby and I are on our own in WA with our families either over east or overseas. Most of our friends are kid free and can't understand why we can't go out until all hours, drink, etc. Heck it was even a fight to get some family members to understand I was not going to drink while breastfeeding!

I absolutely love my boy and he's a miracle because we were told we would not likely be able to conceive naturally due to some health problems I had. He started out life with low blood sugars, variable temperature, major colic and reflux and everyone comments that while he's great boy he is also very frustrated at not being able to walk yet. And my opinion - contrary to some breastfeeding experts - some babies just do NOT want to breastfeed and my boy was one of them. I tried for 5 1/2 months but it was a constant fight. I was sad but he's happier now for it. He loves being in control and prefers to feed himself. I'm sure this is a sign of what I'm really in for soon enough lol.

Oh but I love my life, my boy and my hubby and I would not trade any of it for anything else!

PS - I recommend "Kid Wrangling" by Kaz Cooke for mums to be. It's informative about what to expect after the bub is born but it gives you a comical, realistic glimpse at what you're in for.

kymmy

19-09-2007, 08:34 AM

Yes it is harder than I ever thought. Its constant and trapping in some ways. Of course its worth the joy and pride I feel for my kids. The unconditional love is most definitely what keeps me going.
I was shocked as I never realised that pregnancy could be so uncomfortable. Then how much work newborns are. I enjoy being a Mum but after 7 years I am very tired! I really need a break. Even a lunch break! It is exhausting. :yes:

mollymoosmum

22-09-2007, 08:10 PM

I voted no, but my dd is only 6mths, so ask me again in a few years!!:laughing:

Becoming a new mum is something you can't truly prepare yourself for, it's like the labour in that no matter how many times people try to tell you what it feels like you really don't know till you've been there!:eek:

Molly didn't sleep for the first two months of her life, (seriously, like maybe 5 hours a day max,in 20min lots!!) So I don't think anyone can describe that as easy!

But in saying that after those first few months were over I was very suprised at how well I was coping.

But as I said before....there is a long road ahead of us so ask me again in a few months and it may be a different story!!!:)

tootiredtosleep

22-09-2007, 08:59 PM

It's a lot harder than I ever thought. I don't mind the extra washing and expenses and mess, that I kinda expected. I just didn't plan on hospital trips, fear of surgery, sickness etc and the worry that causes. Or on all the love & joy DD brings to us.

PrincessMJ

23-09-2007, 11:27 AM

yeh i found it alot harder than i expected...i didnt try to expect to much as i had no idea wot it would be like, its very full on to begin with til you get a routine happening....so worth it tho :D

SassyMummy

23-09-2007, 12:03 PM

I said yes, because overall it's NOTHING like I expected or anticipated... but I'm not sure it's much harder.

DD WAS a lot easier than I expected. I expected sleepless nights and whatnot... but I didn't really get many. She was a very easy baby.

The older she gets though, the harder things are. Dealing with a toddler, rather than a baby, is far harder than I expected.

I used to look at mothers out in public and think, "Jeez! Control your child you pathetic mother!" but I feel really guilty about that now... how stupid was I? I know how it is... and god, it's hard to deal with a 2-year-old. It'll probably only get harder...

Emotionally, it's far from what i expected. I think you can't understand hte emotion problems that result from becomming a mother until you actually ARE a mother... so I don't think anyone can expect to feel the way they do after becomming a parent.

Teliahsmum

27-09-2007, 07:42 PM

i dont think it was anywhere near as hard as i thought it would be... everyone told me it would kill me and i abcsolutly love being a mum... i wouldnt have it any other way.

SweetAngels

28-09-2007, 04:51 AM

The hard days/part is about what I expected but the love that I feel for each of them overwhelmed me, I had no idea that I could love THAT much :)

4B2L

28-09-2007, 06:03 AM

No, it was much easier than I expected. Most people were so quick to tell me how I would never sleep again, and to "enjoy my freedom while I can" and many other negative comments. I love being a mum, and the good things outweigh the bad for sure. I didn't read any parenting books, and relied totally on my mothers instinct, and it has paid off.

MummyCharmzy

28-09-2007, 09:50 AM

I think its a lot harder than I expected, as in more challenging but also it is SO much more rewarding than I ever imagined.

OJandMe

28-09-2007, 01:31 PM

I think its a lot harder than I expected, as in more challenging but also it is SO much more rewarding than I ever imagined.

what she said. :D

TTannyaa

29-09-2007, 10:09 AM

I think its a lot harder than I expected, as in more challenging but also it is SO much more rewarding than I ever imagined.

what she said. :D

Yep, that goes double for me.

twitch

29-09-2007, 10:19 AM

The baby part so far has been easier than I expected. I was prepared for a lot less sleep than I am actually getting. I probably wasn't aware of how 24/7 DD is though.

i think the harder part will come when she's a but older and I have to start making some really tough decisions.

Mischief

29-09-2007, 06:36 PM

Being a parent was definately much harder than I expected.

Oliver is a beautiful child (may be a little biased) but I had never prepared myself for PND. That was what really kicked me in the guts so to speak!

I would do it all again (now :rolleyes:) to get the same end result though.

rowiechb

30-09-2007, 02:36 PM

I said yes, definately, but not so much "harder" just totally different to what I expected.
I never realised I would love my child before, they were born.
I never knew how much love you could give your offspring.
I never realised how much of YOUR life you give up for your children.
I never understood sleep deprivation like I do now.

A total LEARNING curve...but so worth it:angel:

StarMumma

01-10-2007, 10:13 PM

Yep - shocked the pants off me first time around :eek: !
Second time was a breeze - knew all the tricks to beat them at their own game :laughing:

Femme la Phoenix

04-10-2007, 07:52 AM

I think the first few months were a shock to the system!!

I now reckon the baby stage is easy in comparison, because babies can't talk back or rebel lol....I think you just evolve your parenting and it shifts slightly to a different focus.

Silvana

04-10-2007, 08:09 PM

Much harder than i thought. I knew to expect the sleepless nights and the crying, but to me, actually experiencing it was a different thing altogether.

It has been nearly 10 months without a full night of sleep and it is sure to continue. It is incredibly difficult and gut wrenching hearing yoru baby scream when they are sick and being able to do little about it. You want to take away their pain as much as possible, but you can only do so much.

Also the constant worry. Not just now, but for the future. You worry that they will get in trouble, do drugs, get sick (serious illnesses) etc. It never ends.

And finally, the lack of personal time. The sheer demand on my emotional and physical energy is unbelievable.

Having said that, I couldn't believe how I could love someone so very much and continue to fall in love with them as they grow.

jocr

05-10-2007, 04:47 PM

I knew that the most important job in the world was going to come with many challenges, however the hardest things for me have been inability to breastfeed, and any time that Meg is sick. The rewards are endless, the best sound in the world is her giggle!!!!!

Tulp

05-10-2007, 05:18 PM

Both DH and I are equally involved in being with DS so I don't feel like it's hard at all. Infact, it's rather entertaining. Of course you have your days when the little one can be a handful.

nayasmum

23-10-2007, 12:31 PM

It was harder in some ways then i expected.....like having a little girl who wont sleep AT ALL during the day :hair:
and she went through that "clingy" stage that was suppose to pass but im still waiting hehe.... but it is all worth it, i wouldnt change a thing and id do it all over again!!

joe

23-10-2007, 06:57 PM

For me it's been harder than I expected for longer than I expected. I think him not sleeping through is the part I have the most trouble with - everything seems so hard when you are tired.

hayles07

24-10-2007, 12:25 PM

Being a parent is everything I expected and so much more! :yes: Quite easy so far!

There are hard days.... BUT..... The love you have for your child is worth every single bit!!! :kiss: :kiss:

Mirad3k

24-10-2007, 01:05 PM

I always expected parenting to be a tough road and it has been. What I did underestimate is how rewarding and pleasurable it's been to have my kids.

babyflash

26-10-2007, 08:27 AM

Being a parent i admit was a lot harder than i had expected, mind you i didnt know what to expect being that nat is my first. I think the biggest reality check was breastfeeding i dont know why but i always thought it was a given that i could do it but when the time came it was without a doubt the hardest thing i have had to do, i think with nat being 4 weeks prem and just not having the strength to suck made it a bit harder but i just thought you put bub to breast and away you go. That said i have good days and bad days like everyone else and i wouldnt change anyof them i love being a mummy its the best !!!!:smiliedance:

SEA

28-10-2007, 10:31 AM

It is as hard as I expected, but having said that the good days far out number the bad days, though I do get alot of family support.:wave:

bAaM

28-10-2007, 10:34 AM

:yes: harder in a good way though it made me grow up.

KATEEK

06-11-2007, 11:52 PM

we found it really easy, but then our daughter slept through the night from 6 weeks on. She is a wonderful baby, if she had of been challenging I may have changed my vote :)

loriemae

15-11-2007, 11:50 AM

Parenting is hard, but very fun. I can't imagine my life without my son. I am proud to be a parent and yes at times it is challenging, but that makes it more rewarding in the end. :)

Mum&bubs

15-11-2007, 11:51 AM

I dunno to be honest. On my bad days, I think 'gosh this is so hard' but on my good days I think it's easy breasy!

kccmylife

30-11-2007, 11:47 AM

I expected it to be the hardest thing I had ever done in my life and it is!! But I love it as much as I thought I would!!

mumofKieran

01-12-2007, 10:07 AM

It wasn't as hard as I thought it would be, especially after everything people say to you when you're pregnant. It is also much, much more fun than I imagined it would be. I have changed so much, from a reasonably ambitious person to someone who just wants to spend every minute with my baby. Even my husband is amazed at how I have changed.

yabyab

01-12-2007, 10:07 AM

It wasn't so much the task of parenting that i found 'hard' more the adjustment to the different relationships that now exist between DP, DS & I as well as new bub soon.

Practice makes perfect (and i'm far from that), no-one is born a mum or dad some things come naturally and some things we learn.

GypsyOnTour

01-12-2007, 11:09 PM

God Yes! A LOT harder that I expected! LOL
I've studied Early Childhood and worked in the Child Care Industry for 7 years before having our first Child - and everything up until now has been breasy! We now have a 6 month old daughter and our son is turning 3 next week - and Yes it is sooooooooooo much harder than I expected! (Probably doesn't help that my husband works FIFO and is away for 4-5 weeks at a time and only comes home for a week)

All I can say is :thumbsup: to Single parents or to other FIFO parents! We should admire them for their stength and ability to the most important job in the world alone! :thumbsup:

Angike

02-12-2007, 07:58 AM

I actually think it's a lot easier than I expected.

The birth was a lot harder than I thought, but once my son was born, he was just so pleasant to be around! I thought he would cry a lot, but he barely did.

I also thought I would be stuck in the house for weeks on end but I found that breastfeeding made him so portable and I could still go grocery shopping and to my parents house etc with little fuss.

He's nearly two and he is still a little angel but I will get back to you in a couple of years when I have another one :laughing:

pookiesossige

02-12-2007, 07:30 PM

Harder, much harder.
I didn't expect a newborn to cry so much, and inconsolably, for unexplained reasons. I didn't expect the 3-5 hours sleep each night for the first 10 months and I thought that breastfeeding just came naturally to all who did it.

I didn't expect such a change in my overall identity- I thought that I'd still be the same old me, just with 'mother' added to the mix.

Didn't expect being home with them to be soooo wonderful though!

no1bub

02-12-2007, 08:36 PM

i found it much easier than i expected, yes it is challenging at times, but not as hard as everyone makes it out to be. especially being a young mum (i was 19 when i had her) so 'older' mums made out like... 'it changes your life so much' and 'you dont know what your getting yourself in for' and 'those sleepless nights'...

i am actually now of the opinion that being younger it was easier to adjust, i didnt sleep much before bubs anyway because i was out of a night lol, and i havent gotten used to going out to fancy places etc so i dont miss it IYKWIM. I dont think anyone knows what they are getting themselves into for the first one, regardless of age. and its not like im trapped in the house... i still go out for coffee and have bbqs etc, and i just love being around my little girl... anyway thats my rant. thanks for reading :ecomcity:

blackdog

03-12-2007, 02:15 PM

:iagree:
I agree with no1bub....when I was 19 I was also up all night with vomit on my jumper....and I didn't even have a baby! (sorry bad joke)

No, I definitely think when you are younger you have more stamina, and fewer expectations.

Having said that, many 'older' parents do not have the stress of financial insecurity.

I'm lucky, because I am both tired and stressed! :dizzy:

Niki01

05-12-2007, 08:16 PM

The first 5 weeks of my son's life was the hardest thing I ever experienced. I had no idea what I was in for :hair: but now I love every minute of it and couldn't image life without him :cloud9:

Meemo

05-12-2007, 09:24 PM

Yes, yes, yes, and did I mention yes??? Lol
I was a child care worker before DD, and I used to say to myself, as did everyone else to me, I look after kids for a living, I'll be great... bzzzzzz WRONG!!! :shame:
It is by far the hardest, most exhausting, mentally draining, emotional rollercoaster of a job ever. BUT it is also the most rewarding, gratifying, and beautiful job in the world, that I would NEVER quit!!!
I love it!!! (99.9999999% of the time... lol:devil6:)

Rubes

07-12-2007, 07:45 PM

Absolutely! I worked as a nanny for three years before i had children so i thought i had a pretty good idea of what to expect. I was wrong. My daughter had colic and reflux and my son is only 3 wks old but wakes in his sleep crying and tense so im pretty sure he has colic aswell. Its true when people say its the most exausting but rewarding job i can think of. Good luck!:yes:

kate mac

07-12-2007, 11:29 PM

Oh Lordy YES!!!!

I went from being a fairly independant business owner, who pretty much did what she wanted when she wanted (and had never even touched a newborn before) to a mother of two tiny babies, who NEEDED me so much... dang it was hard..... I thought I was going to hurt them by doing something wrong, didn't sleep worth a damn for months, and had no help from family..... really, really HARD (but its good now:))

LilShenanigans

07-12-2007, 11:55 PM

Meh, I actually think it's a lot easier then I thought. I thought I'd end up with a kid like my sister... but karma gives me one like me, so DD will be nice until she's 10.

My sister jokes that I raise DD like a cat, ... maybe shes right:rolleyes:

fletchersmummy

16-12-2007, 08:25 PM

About what I expected! He is very hard work, not an easy child by any means, but Mum went on and on prior to me having DS, so I wasnt expecting it to be a breeze
:)

miasmummy259

24-12-2007, 09:06 PM

:smiliedance: i have been a mum for 3 months now and its absolutly amazing. it's much easier than i expected but i had heard a far few horror stories. i do miss being pregnant tho. i thought that was such an amazing experience.

marymac

25-12-2007, 08:12 PM

Was about what I expected. I have a brother who is 10.5 years younger so I had a pretty good idea of how much work was involved.

mummy01

31-12-2007, 11:21 AM

Hello everyone, this is the very first time i have been involved with any 'chat' on the computer..hope it works ok. I agree 100% with a few of you. I Knew it would be hard work, but until experiencing it, i had no idea! The first 6-8 wks were like labour;so increadibly hard and exhausting:sleeping:, but when i got through it i forgot what it actually felt like. For a while i did question why anyone would want to go through this, and felt sorry for any pregnant couple as i knew what was to come. But that passed with my sleep deprivation. some days i still feel all i do is feed, change nappies, and googaah (to a 4mth old). It can feel so repetative at times, and as much as i love her i need to get away from her for an hour or so occasionally to get some perspective again. It really is the best thing in the world...but a lot more demanding than you can ever prepare for. Even the small thing are harder/different; shopping, trying on clothes, going out, spur of the moment trips!! But it is a whole lot more amazing and wonderful than i could ever prepare for to. I love being her mum, and I wouldn't change it for the world.

Kez1985

23-01-2008, 11:18 PM

its a little easier although as my oldest is hitting 3 she has her bad days too so its new for me so i find it a little hard sometimes and i feel guilty when yelling at her and she cries :(lol
so i put what i expected.

mastermum12345

17-02-2008, 12:08 PM

Its not an easy job, but one I would not give up :)

Lollie86

17-02-2008, 11:25 PM

At first it was just as expected as DD was a dream baby but as she started growing things started changing and I am just realising now how hard it actually is and how I need to learn to be more patient.

mysunshine

26-02-2008, 04:57 PM

Oh my god, what an understatement!! No one can ever prepare you for it, but the overwhelming feeling of love and joy that my DD brings to our lives - we wouldn't change a thing.

Can't wait for #2 bub - trying to convince DH to try again this year :laughing:

noniwaldron

26-02-2008, 05:49 PM

the first 3 weeks were hell, i was starting to fall back into depression and all sorts of stuff, thinking 'OMG I want my life back!'. feeding was really painful at first and i was exhausted from having the wee man on my hip nearly 24/7.

but after going to tresilian i am a new person, i reckon it should be compulsory for all new mums! turns out i was keeping ty up heaps longer than he should have been and just wasn't seeing any signs of tiredness. now everything is sooo much easier; my nipples have toughened up :) and he sleeps 3-4 hours at a time during the day and usually a stretch of about 6-8 hours at night, and he's only 7 weeks today. bless his cotton socks, he's such a good bub.

i don't think anything can prepare you for the un-endingness of it all, that's what really got me. i knew i'd be sleep deprived and all that but the fact that there's just no end in sight, no ability to say 'ok i've only gotta make it to the weekend then i can sleep' or anything - just non-stop now till he's an adult! geez, that's scary to think of it that way LOL. i was reallly dreading feeds at the start too because i had cracked nipples etc so it was this awful cringe feeling when he woke up coz i knew it was gonna hurt.

now it's tops though, he sleeps so much that i feel like i hardly see him so i really look forward to him waking up :)

CJJHRA

26-02-2008, 07:03 PM

for me, it was a bit easier than I thought, but I was just past 19, and didnt really know anything else, so I took it all in rather easy, no sleep was easier to handle I felt at 19, than when I was about 31 when DD was born.

mimunchkins

27-03-2008, 03:58 PM

YES YES YES YES YES!!!

It as definitely harder than what I thought with a baby with reflux and eczema. You don't know what you're getting yourself into!

But it's all worth it.

the dargonfly faery

27-03-2008, 06:54 PM

I never thought I would enjoy it so much, and feel so completely happy...it is challenging, but not as hard as everyone makes it out to be. It is harder in some ways then i expected..... like when she cries for hrs on end and is completely exhused but refuses sleep or when she cries everytime I stop at the lights in the car or when we are out in hte pram and I stop to look at something and she starts crying, no reason move again and she is quiet, smiling at me. :p
But it is SO much more rewarding than I ever imagined considering I never wanted children :angel:

shazlee83

28-03-2008, 08:34 AM

POSITION VACANT

Mother, Mum, Mama, Mummy, Ma

JOB DESCRIPTION:
Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work in an, often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call. Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities. Travel expenses not reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also required.

RESPONSIBILITIES:
The rest of your life. Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5. Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat in case, this time, the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf. Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers. Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of multiple homework projects. Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks. Must be willing to be indispensable one minute, an embarrassment the next. Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices.. Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst. Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the end product. Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout the facility.

POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION:
Virtually none. Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you

PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE:
None required unfortunately. On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.

WAGES AND COMPENSATION:
Get this! You pay them! Offering frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them become financially independent. When you die, you give them whatever is left. The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.

BENEFITS:
While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and no stock options are offered; this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth and free hugs for life.

NO, beng a mum wasnt wat i expected, parts are worse,and parts are way way better! I know every mum will identify with this. :yelclap:4 being a mumma!

Kwakagirl

08-05-2008, 01:40 PM

If I knew then what I know now I would have paid more attention when people said to relax when I finished work and was still pregnant... I ran around doing stuff. I wish I'd sat still for 3 weeks because I feel as though I will never sit still again.
I never really understood just how much you can be consumed by one little tiny person, how your whole concept of happiness can depend on what they are feeling.
Also "sleep deprivation" takes on a whole new meaning when it goes on for weeks on end. When you are a teenager staying out all night and get no sleep, at least you can make up for it my sleeping for 15 hours the next day - motherhood doesn't work that way....
But like they all say - I wouldn't change it for the world :valentine:

Amy91andLilUns

15-06-2008, 06:43 AM

millymoo

15-06-2008, 02:11 PM

The instant bond and love felt for my babies was so overwhelmingly better than anything I had expected and still is. The joy they bring is something nothing can compare to BUT I am very thankful for that as there are times when it is hard and yes probably harder than I thought.

The hard things for me were the unexpected.

I remember when DD1 was about 4 and DD2 was 2. I have always been a very happy person but went through a phase where they tested my patience so much and I just felt I was telling them off and being cross all the time. I didn`t like how that felt and so yes that was hard to deal with.

For me only when the bad times outway the good does it feel harder than I had imagined.

Currently the good outways the bad:flowerz:

LittleButton

15-06-2008, 02:23 PM

All seemed wonderful, everything perfect... then reality hit, was harder than expected

JellybeanLOVER

15-06-2008, 02:26 PM

Easier then I ever expected... so far:)

Ronni78

15-06-2008, 06:29 PM

Not with the first and second bubs. When I had my third, a premmie, it became very hard... but of course I wouldn't change anything for the world! :hugs:

jaq

15-06-2008, 06:44 PM

I voted No because ... I was expecting it to be harder to give up my autonomy. I thought I was too selfish a person to be a good parent, basically.

I had no idea that love really CAN conquer all ... my sense of self just reshaped around being a parent, rather than the other identifiers I was used to.

I expected the crying/not sleeping/feeding/mess etc would be hard, but I never knew how much fun it would be. It makes all the drudgery worth it, and then some.

kiwibird27

15-06-2008, 06:52 PM

I never considered my child would b disabled.....or need to be in hospital long term, no one warns u that things could go wrong

Kazamataz

16-06-2008, 10:33 AM

I worked in child care for many years so I was used to being around children and I had read 101 parenting books. So i felt I was as prepared as I could be.

The things that I wasn't prepared for was the lack of sleep, but I got used to that rather quickly.
And the judgment of others, doesn't matter what you do with your child someone will have an opinion on it.

So in the end I know that I am doing the best job I can.
I continue to educate myself and if I do make a mistake I just try to do better next time.

I personally find parenting somewhat easy.
Thats not to say I don't get stressed out or tired or frustrated or feel I'm at the end of my rope.
But then I remember that tomorrow is a new day.

I don't think parenting is hard at all IMO FOR MY SITUATION.

I UNDERSTAND FOR OTHERS IT IS HARD.

Kazamataz

16-06-2008, 10:40 AM

To be honest, it was pretty much what I expected, if not a little easier. Because I'm young, there were (and are again) the usual "you've ruined your life" "do you know how hard it's going to be with two/three?" "how do you know Dan will support you?" etc etc etc

So really I was prepared4 it all and it's the best thing EVER!!!

WOW your amazing having 3 children at 16.
It doesn't matter when you have your children people will have an opinion on it.
If you know your doing the best job you can then thats all that matters.

And hey at least your young you can run around and have fun with your children. Not to mention when they are your age you will understand them and relate to them a whole lot better.

Amy91andLilUns

20-06-2008, 04:50 AM

WOW your amazing having 3 children at 16.
It doesn't matter when you have your children people will have an opinion on it.
If you know your doing the best job you can then thats all that matters.

And hey at least your young you can run around and have fun with your children. Not to mention when they are your age you will understand them and relate to them a whole lot better.

Aww thank hun, I'll b 17 by the time #3 is born

I totally agree hun, as long as ur up4 it and totally comitted 2 ur children then it doesnt matter whenever u have them :)

Lol, yeps I sure can hehe

And yep, although I'll b one of those mums who tells their children not 2 do something even though they did :laughing:

EFIJY1969FaMiLy

22-06-2008, 02:29 AM

:crying: The day you find out you are preg. its great news, but to then go back to emergency that very night to be told you lost it. Was the hardest thing my wife and I have ever had to do. You never forget it, but you learn to deal with it as each year passes. The way we got through the pain was to believe that it was natures way of natural selection.

On a brighter note, we now have 2 beautiful boys (3) and (9), and I could not have asked for more, yes GOD does work in mysterious ways, but in our life I could not ask for better children, loving and caring, and they understand right from wrong. I feel although we endured lots of pain, our prayers were heard, and I feel that we have been blessed.

One child was born 11/11 and a personal belief that a lost sole from Sep 11, has had the chance at life on this earth again.

Sorry, Yes, this is very DEEP. :iagree:

mum2bubba

22-06-2008, 10:38 AM

At times it is quite hard.

kellyanneg

05-07-2008, 07:43 PM

I had fun when my daughter was a bub, then she turnned two and i had my baby boy.
There is 21 mths in between them and almost every day was a struggle to get through.

They are now 2 1/2 and 6 mths and i am managing alot better then 5 mths ago. I just had to learn to do more then i ever thought was capable for one person to do at the same time. I wouldnt change it for the world and i love our good days.

Can't wait 4 the terrible twos to be gone...

preciousbabyboy

05-07-2008, 07:47 PM

I found it easy to cope with my first but i think it gets harder the more babies you have;)

My first so far has been easier than i expected:yelclap: But then again ask me the same question in 20 yrs time:laughing:

Earthychick

06-07-2008, 07:24 AM

Becoming a mum was a wonderful experience with MANY learning curves!!! Our little daughter just fitted in with everything we use to do, for example: going fishing in the tinnie by 3 mths and camping by 4mths. It was wonderful to see her eyes light up at these new experiences. In the home front I just took it a day at a time, read a lot of books about being a mother of a baby (took what I wanted out of them) and deep breathed when things got a little hairy.
I love being a MUM but I do have moments where I want to hide so I can get something done for myself.

xxLiLLixx

29-07-2008, 07:36 PM

Its definitely hard at times but overall its just a joy, all the hard times are worth every single smile.
I just love being a mum, i couldnt think of anything better then watching my little girl growing up. Its truely the best thing in the world!!

gazelle

30-07-2008, 06:43 PM

In a nutshell. Yeah I guess it's harder. But it's also more rewarding then I ever expected too. I didn't know what a full heart of love felt like until I had my DD.
:iagree:
I coped fine with the physical tasks - it was the overwhelming emotion of being a mum which nothing could prepare me for... I remember crying (probably had something to do with those hormones too) in advance for all the times DS would hurt... :rolleyes:

Jaileth

30-07-2008, 07:06 PM

I had this idea that you could put a baby down to nap for two - three hours and get things done... :laughing::laughing:

There are times when being a mum feels like the hardest thing you could ever possibly do - and then there are the times when they melt your heart and you just want to pick them up and never let them go.

During the first few sleep deprived months, I could never have begun to imagine how much I'd grow to love my son - now he is my world, and I can't wait to meet his little sister!

danik

01-08-2008, 10:52 PM

Yes but so much more rewarding than I expected.

pinkgingham

01-08-2008, 11:12 PM

overall...no not harder than i expected. most times i cope quite well even when i think i dont. as my first child reached 12 months i realised i had a spirited child on my hands and well TBH i never knew that kids could even be "spirited". but i do ok. and as he has gotten older (now 2.5) he has settled down. sending him to daycare has helped too. it couldnt have been all that bad, seeing we have a 17 month age gap here as i fell pregnant with my DD when my DS was 8 months.

pinkgingham

01-08-2008, 11:13 PM

I had this idea that you could put a baby down to nap for two - three hours and get things done... :laughing::laughing:

what til you have your DD and they sleep at different times and you dont get that 2-3 hours to get stuff done :laughing:

Waiting4girl

05-08-2008, 11:14 AM

So far it is easier than I expected. My sister said it will be the hardest thing I ever do, but my Masters of Engineering thesis was harder. Still, my baby is only 16 months old. I think it will be harder when she is 16 years old!

maybe1more

05-08-2008, 05:01 PM

Definatley being a mum for the first time was sooooo much harder then i expected, more so just not having the confidences to know if i was doing the right thing or not, second time around was so much easier as i was more confident, but was still hard in diffrent ways.

welshmum08

09-08-2008, 07:10 AM

Wen my lil boy was new born u cudnt move wiv out him stirring in his sleep at night, he 6months old nw n sleeps right thru but hes a nightmare 2drop off 2sleep coz he fights it even wen hes realy tired el jst cry n scream til e drops off, i was expecting it 2b all that it has been tho. :flowerz:

indigoin0z

09-08-2008, 07:19 AM

after 1 - ????? bit of a novelty, like having a doll or puppy... sort of???

after 2 - yep...

after 3 - NO COMMENT:footinmouth:

its harder in the context of,

these are individual personalities, with individual needs & issues... which all need individual handlings.. they are not robots...

i take parenting consciously, not powerfully...:bee:
[note that didnt say 'perfectly' but consciously;)]

for that it makes it very hard...

especially when the mummy & the daddy are very unique 'individuals' with their own 'complex' needs & issues...

WHAT A *#^! NIGHTMARE...
this would be hard enough to deal with if i had nothing else to do in life.. but then with 'life itself'.......

Safali

11-08-2008, 09:16 AM

Yes for me it was. I dont find it demanding physically, i expected to be sleep deprived and running around while not having much time to myself, but what i didn't anticiapate is the emotiontional requisition that parenting requires. The love you have for the child comes with a huge reponsibilty, and because i want to be the best mother i can be it does comes with alot of worry, stress and questioning parenting techiniques. I guess its something i couldnt expect until i became parent.

chrissa28au

18-08-2008, 07:16 PM

I didnt realy have any expectation, I think being a parent to older kids(teenagersLOL) is alot harder then younger kids IMO:D But I found sometimes its easier sometimes its hard it just depends:D

bridgy86

18-08-2008, 07:23 PM

My mother/mil etc 'warned' me about how difficult babies were, but i was ready, and absolutely loved it. I felt it came naturally and i really love my little buddy.
The one thing I DID find harder than expected was leaving her, letting others care for her, and not feeling right to return to work.
These ones are the hardest for me.
Im also wary about having another bub as me and dd have such a close bond. sounds silly but hey.

EvangelinaOne

18-08-2008, 07:48 PM

:yes:I was just talking to my DH about this. We both think parenting has been easier than we expected. Having said that our DD is only one we have many more turbulent years ahead of us. It has been a joy so far for both of us however we have been blessed with a child that sleeps well. We were expecting sheer hell so I guess that helps.:laughing:

Renben

19-08-2008, 09:56 AM

MummyGoingMad

19-08-2008, 10:47 PM

After working in childcare for about 6 years before DS#1 arrived I never realised how good it was to give the kids back at the end of the day and go home to a nice quiet house.. I used to look at pregnant women and think how lucky they were.. 2 years and 2 boys later I now look at pregnant women and think thank god thats not me..lol..

Iv always worked with kids too but having your own is so different! Way more stressful because if ur like me you worry about them more and cant be 100% rational, its a mum thing! Also having them up all night and early morning as well as the day... makes a huge difference!

Having 1 child I found a lot easier but 2 is more of a struggle... has gotten better now that they're a bit older (it was probably worst when they were 1 and 2).

angelbaby013

19-08-2008, 11:01 PM

:no: being a parent is wondering, sure its hard work @ times but its all worth it...

all the stories people used to tell me to scare me where just that..stories...well for me anyway.

people tell me im lucky my daughter is too easy to look after..maybe..maybe not..

but either way i lurrrve being a mummy and can't wait for the next one to arrive :smiliedance:

jessesmum

10-09-2008, 04:00 PM

Being a mother came kind of naturally, i spose. Maybe its cos i've got 8 brothers and sister and my parents both come from families of about 10, i dunno. Looking fater your brothers and sisters and looking after your own child, they're miles apart! i always had an underlying paranoia whenever i left him with anyone, even my boyfriend or my parents, in the first few months, but i've relaxed heaps more now and i'm adjusting fairly well. Going back to school was stressful, but i told myself it wasn't just better for me, but it's better for him as well. there's a lot of stigma surrounding teenage parenthood, but you're not destined to be a bad mum just because you're young. Anyway. So yeah. =)

thatgirl

12-09-2008, 06:32 AM

Well I've only been a parent for 10 and a bit week's now but honestly I thought it was going to be alot harder than what it is.

Bewitched

12-09-2008, 06:41 AM

I wasn't aware how time consuming, patience testing, energy sapping and frustrating being the parent of a "spirited" child could be.

:iagree::o:o:o

nugget

16-09-2008, 12:47 PM

I think it is hard at times for sure, but not as bad as pthers had made it out to be. I guess it depends on how you handle things and how you look at things.
every time my kids play up, i think of the millions of people who can't have kids and would give anythign to have even really naughty children!

makingalolaorliam

16-09-2008, 12:53 PM

In a word-yes! :yes:

Absolutely-I never knew how much it would matter to me to get it right!

ClutterBug

16-09-2008, 01:36 PM

I was told soo many horror stories and none of those have happened for us, I was prepared and expecting it to be the hardest thing ever. Whilst I admit it is hard it's not as hard as I expected.
:iagree:
Actually i never wanted kids at all.
I was engaged to a guy for a while and one day he said that he wanted 7 kids. I said i didn't want any and we broke up.

My next BF said he didn't want kids, but after 6 years of marriage, i began to notice how he acted around his nieces & nephews and i gave in and had a baby for him.

She's now 8 months old and its much much better than i ever imagined. I will probably have just one more baby in a few years.

Ruby Slippers

16-09-2008, 01:48 PM

When I was younger maybe 8 years old
I thought my Mum just watched Days of Our Lives ,
and did really not that much ,:laughing:
ummmmmmmmmmmm was I clueless :confused:
My Mum had 8 Children 6 girls 2 boys not in that order :rolleyes:

my Dad worked Hard and long hours at he's job ,
and my Mum would make us our meals ,clean the house ,do the washing and with 8 children you could imagine :hair:
and really my parents made me feel loved ,
so when I became a parent I did know it was going to be hard but really more the emotional than Physical ,
the worry about my Children will never end even when they grow up and have familys of there own ,
but I would not change a thing I love my 3 children ,
and when I think times are hard I think of a wonderful role model my Mum ,
and then I don't complain well not that much anyway I am human :rolleyes:.