Does being a mother fulfill you as much as you thought it would? [Archive]

Uniquey

27-08-2007, 09:31 AM

Pre-children, I never thought I could love another human being as much as I do now I'm a Mum. There is so much love in my heart, that I really didn't know existed before. Sure, I have days when I think what happened to spontaniety, money, time, etc, but the rewards of being a Mum (for me), far outweigh any things I think I may yearn for pre-baby. I wouldn't say I'm a 'Doris Day' Mum, But I certainly do enjoy cooking my dd meals, going to the park, playing with her etc. Wouldn't have it any other way:D

salt water

27-08-2007, 09:32 AM

Well I'll put my hand up and say that I have days where I miss work.
Not that I miss the actual work but I do miss the adult contact, the having something to think about other than how much milk is left in the fridge, I miss my work clothes (they were always clean :o ), feeling organised and purposeful.

Don't get me wrong, I love this too but there are things about my old life, the old me that I wonder if I will ever see again.
I'm sure if I was at work today, I'd be longing to be at home :D

nut

27-08-2007, 09:36 AM

It is better than I ever dared imagine:D .

27-08-2007, 09:46 AM

most definitly it does!!

That being said i have only been a parent for a short 6 weeks.
I will however have to go back to work, and in one way i am looking forward to it.

But the feeling you get from being a mother and having a little person that just loves and adores you to no end, really is the most amazing feeling in the world.
I wouldnt trade anything for it.

missie_mack

27-08-2007, 09:46 AM

I'm with Noosa. I have days where I am itching to go back to work and othes I think wow this home thing is great. Both have their pro's and con's.
Being a mother has many rewards that cannot ever be measured in dollars but it also has its downsides. It can be a very lonely adventure at least in the early times. It is much busier than I ever anticipated pre baby and emotionally and physically exhausting....

Going back in the workforce offers personal time (not to mention the ablity to use the bathroom without a audience) and often intellectual reward. Also easing money tensions at home. Raising children today costs a fortune! But it cannot give back the precious few years we have our children as our own without having to share them with the outside world.

I haven't found my balance. But I would love to be able to live the best of both worlds one day!

SalTheGal

27-08-2007, 09:47 AM

jaxcoop

27-08-2007, 09:49 AM

Sometimes on the rare occasion i wish i could go back before i had kids and enjoy hanging out with mates and getting drunk and having a blast.....but then i just want to get back to reality and hang out with my kids and get giddy on tickles and smiles and having a blast!!!:D I would never have thought that i could feel this amount of love for someone that i have only known for 4yrs and 5mths, its absolutely amazing

jbie

27-08-2007, 09:51 AM

you're asking 2 dif qns here: the poll's "Does being a MOTHER fulfill you as much as you thought it would?" has nothing to do with SAHMing as your post asks.

i can feel overwhelmingly fulfilled being a mother, but still want to work for other reasons.
i can feel overwhelmingly fulfilled being a mother, but not have motherhood meet ALL my needs; i still need things that have nothing to do w motherhood (eg time for my own needs, grooming, friends, work, romantic life, financial)

it's like saying:
Q: "Does being a mother fulfill you as much as you thought it would?"
A: No, i still need to eat.

does this make sense?

i think you need to clarify in your post whether you're asking about how fulfilled you feel by Motherhood /OR/ how fulfilled you feel by SAHMotherhood.

i am a SAHM btw

PrincessofGod

27-08-2007, 09:52 AM

its wonderful, wouldnt change it for anything! i love being a mum even though we all have those days! but its worth it! i love it! and i SO cant wait to be a mother all over agian some day! :D

BubbaNoogie

27-08-2007, 09:52 AM

Yes! It is what I have always wanted. There is a 11 year gap between my daughters. I really missed it when my eldest started school, so I am loving having a little one running around again.
But I suppose its easy with 2 beautiful girls:p. Can't wait to do it again.

bubhub

27-08-2007, 09:58 AM

Comments taken on board - I've changed the wording slightly.

Mummaof2

27-08-2007, 10:09 AM

I think this poll is a tad misleading.

I voted yes- definitely, as I feel like I have achieved more than I possibly could in becoming a mother, I love every minute of it, and stop to pinch myself every single day that i could have this wonderful little person making my life so much richer than it ever was. I can easily lose hours just 'playing' together.

However- I am back at work, and I couldn't be a SAHM, I need the stimulation of working also, but not because I don't find being a mum stimulating enough- both roles are fulfilling different needs.

Just my thoughts! :)

I am the same.

I have had 2 beautiful angels come into my life that mean the world and beyond to me and I treasure every minute i have with them and I enjoy sitting back watching them play and learning from each other. But in saying that I am also back at work full time forging ahead with my career but i wouldnt be where I am in my career if it wasnt for the happiness, joy and strength I get from being such a happy fulfille mum.

BaDaBing

27-08-2007, 12:43 PM

I think it fulfills me more than i ever thought it would but yes there are days when I would like to go back to being a DINK (double income no kids). I would never change it though, its just nice to get a break every once in a while.

xxxDragonFlyxxx

27-08-2007, 01:29 PM

Being a mother and bringing life into this world is more rewarding than I can possibly put into words.

My DD is my world and I cannot simply begin to imagine how I lived my life without her in it!

jaydensmum

27-08-2007, 01:32 PM

I would never take back having the kids. They bring so much joy and happiness into our lives. Being a mother is the most rewarding job that anyone could ever do. We are all very lucky women to have the opportunity to have our kids and become mummys! :yes:

subaruforestermum

27-08-2007, 01:37 PM

There is so much more that I want in my life than kids.... Although I love my son, I want more out of life than just being a mum....

I want success in the outside world, as well as with my son! And I wont be fully fulfilled until I have that success...and happiness

OJandMe

27-08-2007, 01:37 PM

SophieD

27-08-2007, 01:47 PM

I have 2 beautiful children and I wouldn't have it any other way. Your priorities definitely change as all your decisions now are about what's best for the kids. I can't imagine growing old and not having family get-to-gethers with my children and grandchildren. How boring would life be without kids!
To all those soon-to-be mothers out there, just remember you have more good days than bad and your life will be more rewarding:smiliedance: !
Sophie!

Alana13

27-08-2007, 02:04 PM

I love being a mum! I never knew you could love someone THIS much, every time I see him smile it makes my day, no matter how tired I am.

I dont go back to work till May 08, I am already trying to think of ways to create income - I dont think I will handle not being with DS everyday.

BUT i do miss the adult interaction and challanges my job gave me......ohhh and the $$$

jbie

27-08-2007, 02:05 PM

becoming a mother def gave me a huge amount of emotional fulfilment, where before there were huge gaps, and i was always searching.

not to say that motherhood has completely fulfilled me, but it has a great deal, more so than many other things have/could have.

it's just amazing.. it's the best thing i could ever have done. and i privately think that life with children is so amazingly rich, that life without children seems empty.

but i still want/need other things, of course:
-a good marriage
-some time for myself to: nurture myself, pursue my own interests, develop my mind, feed my spirit, and care for my body
-opportunities to have some independent financial means..
-relationships w other people, friends, ppl to contribute meaningfully to.
etc

mikaylasmummy

27-08-2007, 02:30 PM

I never knew the feeling of fullfilness until I had my little pirncess. Mikayla brings so much joy to my life, everyday that I hold her is a blessing.

Nan

27-08-2007, 02:49 PM

I do feel fulfilled, but must admit to the odd wish for "the simple life".

Mummy to Mason

27-08-2007, 02:59 PM

I voted yes definately. I have always wanted to be a mother and would never have felt complete or fulfilled if I didn't have my son. Sure there are so many other important things in life such as career, travel etc but none of that mattered to me.

I also never knew you could love someone this much until I had my son Valentine

anscje

27-08-2007, 03:15 PM

I picked the 2nd option (yes but there are days I long for the old life).

In having said that DH & I try to manage a weekend away every 4-6 months where my parents take DS.

We go away and stay in a posh hotel and drink and eat way too much food on room service and spend the entire weekend in bed.

My parents say it's boring but being able to watch a DVD together alone without DS interupting is all we need to reconnect and have some alone time together.

But there is nothing more heart warming then walking through my parents door after that long week and seeing my beautiful boy.

Being a mother has enriched my life. Not quite fulfilled it as I have alot of other stuff I would like to do as well, but it has definately been the best damn thing in my life! (as well has DH :hugs: )

Snuffys Mum

27-08-2007, 03:35 PM

I'm going to go against the grain here but....

Nope. Motherhood doesn't fullfil me in anyway I expected it would. In fact I feel more unfulfilled now than I ever have in any other time in my life. :cool:

Chelle123

27-08-2007, 03:44 PM

I wouldn't change anything when it comes to me choosing to have kids but I still feel like there is more out there for me, whatever it might be.

Malibu

27-08-2007, 03:45 PM

In all honesty I have never felt more fullfilled or happy in my life than I have since having my children. I absolutely love it.

I know everyone is different.;)

SassyDiva

27-08-2007, 03:47 PM

Somedays YES, some days No..

I love being a mum but still want to grow as a person

Seekrit

27-08-2007, 03:47 PM

I voted "not as much.." but not in a "I WANT TO GIVE HIM BACK" sorta way, just pre-kids I imagined a different life and feelings to this one :)

Lastcenturymum

27-08-2007, 04:03 PM

I found it to be the most fulfilling job I could do. I always wanted to be a mum and put everything into raising our kids.

Yes, it was harder than I thought and there were days I wondered why I bothered and if I was making a difference, but great support of my husband, family and a good network of friends got me through those tough times. My husband and I agreed before we had kids that he would be the main breadwinner and I would be working at home raising our children.

I never wished I had another sort of career or was at work instead. I wanted to have as much input into our kids as possible and would never have considered putting them in care. I worked part time when they were a bit older (when youngest was 3) and was very fortunate to have very helpful parents. I guess I was never someone who wanted to 'mark my mark' in the world, but being a helpful useful person to others was more important. The time spent involved in the kids lives was worth any less in a material sense

As I look back it was definitely worth it. The relationship I have with each of my kids and their memories of growing up was worth it all

lilpearl

29-08-2007, 10:55 AM

I feel fullfilled by motherhood, and would hate to be single with no children again. What on earth would I do? lol....never a dull moment with children around! However, I absolutely have, not days, but moments, where I dream of having a night to myself, or going drinking and dancing, or going on a road trip on the back of a Harley. Sometimes I do freak out that youth is slipping me by, but the alternative would be worthless to me - before children, I longed for them. Absolutely LONGED for them, and I look forward to whitnessing and being a part of their journey (and it wont be long before they're old enough for me to go out drinkign and dancing occasionally, and then I'll miss them being babies!). Be here now.

sunnyflower

29-08-2007, 10:58 AM

being a mother beats anything i ever did in my past life,i absolutely love it.:p

juzzyduck

29-08-2007, 01:05 PM

It took me 12months after my first for it to sink in that I was not going back to work, our choice, I really missed my job and the people. I am glad we can afford for me to stay at home and not work and I love the kids to bits but I do miss quiet time without them and time with just my husband but that is our life and they will not be little forever, there is always retirement, heheheheh.

mum23girls

29-08-2007, 01:06 PM

I will be honest and say I opted for NO.

I love my kids, but more often than not, I dislike being a mum. I feel I need to do something more with my life. I hate being at home. :hair: There is heaps more, but it is all too hard to put in words.

millismum

01-09-2007, 12:59 PM

Love it! Love it! Love it!

WizzFizz

02-09-2007, 07:13 AM

I love my children, but motherhood isn't quite what I expected! I'm still adjusting, and I do miss "me time" and working, but at the same time if I was at work I would miss the kids. I've battled with PND, something which I didn't expect, but I'm getting through it and as the kids get older, life gets easier!

our little treasures

02-09-2007, 08:53 AM

Absolutely 110%!! I love being a mummy and wouldn't want to go back to not being mummy!! My days are all good although there are those tentative moments.

I actually enjoy it after all why else would I keep going back.

andie_pandie

02-09-2007, 09:03 AM

Absolutely love being a mum and yes to 3 boys. I have big differences between the ages so sometimes they are all doing different things at different times etc.

The older boys love their soccer so we are always there to support them. And Bubs is showing signs of following his brothers, he was kicking around the soccer ball yesterday and wanting to get on the field.

The time that I find hard is the night time feeds (should not be on them as 14mths) but loves his breastmilk. When you have to work and bubs has been up a couple of times you think what have I signed up for LOL - but would not have it any other way.

When my first son was born DH said that he knows what his real vocation was and that was to be a dad, and mine was always to be a Good Mum.

hayleysmummy

02-09-2007, 02:25 PM

Since having DD nothing else matters to me as much as she does I love evry minute of being a mum Its the bhest thing that has ever happened to me

melannh

05-09-2007, 11:48 AM

I'm with Noosamum and Micki-mack..

There are days where I am itching to something without a baby... I love DD to death and am so thankful to have her in our lives, but I do find it isolating and frustrating at times. Whether that is due to coming from a very busy and challenging career and am now a SAHM - I can't be sure... But, sometimes I do wonder how I will get by being a SAHM for years on end.
I get alot of satisfaction out of spending time with DD and enjoy seeing her development. I love being able to provide for another and love another so much. She is my, and DP's world - and I wouldn't trade it for anything - in saying that. Some days can be very long, hard, lonely and frustrating..... I am glad i am not the only one that feels this way at times.

Nemo

05-09-2007, 02:39 PM

Yes it does. I never knew it would be THIS fulfilling. It's the best thing I ever did.

OopsieDaisy

05-09-2007, 05:01 PM

It does yep... but in all honestly I have times where I day dream about what it would be like if i never had kids... especially because I started before I even had the chance to experience alot of what most others have, having them so young and all.

I'd never change it for anything though!

EskimoMumma

05-09-2007, 05:09 PM

At first I didn't think it did. So I went back to work..

Well..

I defiantly know the kids fulfill me.

proud_mama

09-09-2007, 01:33 PM

4B2L

09-09-2007, 01:42 PM

I could not be more fullfilled. I have been a sahm for 8 years, and they have been the best years of my life, I am so glad I didn't trade them for more $$$$$$. It hasn't always been easy on one wage, but the reward has paid 10 times the amount I would have earned. I just cannot bare to miss a second. :thumbsup:

susiehomemaker

09-09-2007, 07:46 PM

I always wanted to be a Mum, but I always worried that once I got here I wouldnt like it but I wouldnt swap it for anything in the world! I am so relieved lol. I never wish for my old life back- not ever. Sometimes I wish DD would sleep in so I could sleep in too though pmsl. Some day DD drives me up the walls with her naughty antics but I love her to distraction. There is nothing else I want to be so I dispair of the day when all our children are grown :( I wish I could bottle this time and visit from time to time when that day comes!

MummyCharmzy

10-09-2007, 08:19 AM

absolutely it does, yes sometimes i have moments when ill think otherwise but i think everyone has those thoughts occasionally lol

Blessed Mum

10-09-2007, 08:28 AM

More than I ever imagined it would. Wouldn't change it for a thing. :D

littlejoy

18-09-2007, 09:02 AM

I look at my son and can not believe that my DH and I made him!!! I love being a Mum!!!
However, the grass is always greener on the other side.... so there are days when I think I would love to work part time for the adult interaction aand to wear some nice cloths that don't have food or milk on them but if I was at work i would miss my little guy and just want to be at home... I miss having two incomes as well.
Emotionally I feel very fulfilled!!!!!!!!!!

Unsure

18-09-2007, 09:15 AM

I had to go with option 2. Although I have moments where I miss work (maily adult contact and the money), the main element that having a child has changed that I miss - is my relationship with DH. I just miss some of the "us" time, where we didn't have to worry about getting interupted, or we could be a little bit impractical and spontanious (& I'm not just talking about sex!!).

I know things will change as she gets older, and I feel confident leaving her with someone else for a night or something like that...

Oh - but I must say, nothing else is like it, and you can't explain how much love you can feel for your child...

kymmy

19-09-2007, 08:50 AM

Overload at times and then numbness at other times.
I think the relationship I have with my children's father (my husband :D) is far more important. It isn't easy but I have to continue bonding with my kids and spending quality time with them one on one - when I do that I feel very much emotionally fulfilled.

shed

19-09-2007, 10:33 AM

Yes, I find it to be very fulfilling, more than I ever thought I would. I absolutely love it, its my role, I study up about it just like any other job, I live for it which is more than I have done for any other job.

I am happy. But I did a lot before I had him because I didn't want to feel like I had given up anything to have him I just wanted to enjoy it completely. I needed to do that.

ThomasMum

19-09-2007, 01:22 PM

Yeah absolutely.

We were so ready when we had Thomas. Weve done some traveling, bought the house, finished our degrees DH even did some bungee jumpings LOL.

Wouldnt want to go back, life would be so empty without our lil Tom :)

neostudded

19-09-2007, 01:30 PM

It did for me, more than I thought it would :yes:

Femme la Phoenix

19-09-2007, 02:51 PM

I have loved being a Mum since the day I found out I was pregnant. From the moment DS was born I knew that I was so blessed to be his Mum...

I do have more to give, and I don't find it satisfies me completely mind, body and soul. It doesn't mean I don't feel it anymore or any less than anyone else just that it doesn't complete me (if that makes sense) it is very hard to describe.....:rolleyes:

Once we have a teenager at high school, either a bub in my tum or arms, and at uni studying for a long term career goal .....maybe then I'll feel more content :confused: By that I don't mean that having one is not as satisfiying either......it is more a feeling that I have more to give career wise and I don't think I find motherhood as a career choice satisfies every part of me...

chellegoth

19-09-2007, 03:43 PM

No, I don't find it fulfilling at all.

taliistheword

19-09-2007, 03:49 PM

i feel so fulfilled but there are sometimes i just wish i could hand her back but i know i can't so i live with it, i wish i could hand her back at the moment as she a cold and is crying alot

Perth_Pony

19-09-2007, 05:52 PM

Certainly not fulfilling for me either.

Lollie

19-09-2007, 07:42 PM

I do have my days where I reminisce but I am very fulfilled and I can't imagine my life any other way.

StarMumma

19-09-2007, 08:49 PM

Sometimes yes, sometimes no.
I feel I am a much more patient, understanding and loving parent since I have returned to full time work. I really appreciate the time I have with the boys now...rather than just going through the motions, looking around and wondering if this is all my life is going to be??
God, that sounds horrible in text - I really do love and adore my sons.

*babygirl*

19-09-2007, 09:31 PM

difinately... DEFINATELY more rewarding than i ever could have imagined. me and DP didnt think we were fully capable of loving our creation as much as this... especially when we didnt even know if we loved EACH OTHER!!!
but having her in common is the most beautiful connection and when she looks between us with big cheeky smiles and all the love in the world how can we not meltValentine

SiLeNt_AnGeL

20-09-2007, 09:13 AM

i voted yes, but have days where i would like to go bak before i had my girl. I find that she is very challenging sometimes and some days i am just to damn tired to deal with her:hair: even though i have no choice because my partner works and im a SAHM. he is getting better with helping me though when he is home, this morning he took her so i could have a sleep in (granted it was only a hour or so that i actually got to sleep in before hse woke me up n he went bak to bed, but it was better then being woken up at 6am and having to get out of bed.. lol).. the other day he took her while i had an after noon sleep, i woke up to find he had fed her, bathed her and was about to re-dress her for bed, it was nice. first time:kiss:

But for the most part i love it, especially when i walk into a room and she puts her hands in the air and says mum, to get cuddles and kisses from me. she is such a cheeky bugger when she wants to be.. :kiss: :hugs:

luvmybubba

20-09-2007, 01:16 PM

Well, I have the best of both worlds.................. I have a georgeous 15mth old and work part time while DH looks after him (or should I say teaches him bad habbits). I'd love to be able to stay at home but I think I would miss the adult contact but when i'm working all I can think about is what he's up to know.

brodiebunch

20-09-2007, 01:32 PM

I voted no.Mainly because I suffer with PTSD after Ds birth.I am missing great chuncks of my early memories and that hurts.Also I am a sahm expecting #2 in december,while I love being a mum and spending time with my ds i also want to have more in life.I dont wish to be defined as only a mother,I want that to be a part of who I am.ATM I am Olivers mum and thats it,I need to find myself again to be more completeley fulfilled.

mum2bubba

07-10-2007, 06:44 PM

Still searching I think....

bigmumma

08-10-2007, 08:07 PM

i chose option 2 but there are also times when i think choice 3 applies too :)

Mirad3k

24-10-2007, 01:06 PM

It's been so much more fulfilling than I expected.

Eloise&Charlie'sMum

24-10-2007, 01:26 PM

I honestly cant imagine what life was like before DD came along...she is our whole world, my good morning and my good night, she is what make me who I am today and I cant wait for her little brother or sister to be born and help fill my heart with even more love and enjoyment.

Challenging most deffinately but the sigle most rewarding and fullfilling thing I have ever done in my life :kiss:

sillysideup

24-10-2007, 03:20 PM

I love being mumma to my two girls (and one on the way) but I have to admit I find it exhausting and sometimes I do struggle to remember who I was before I had children. Me time is very limited and when I do get it i'm usually so tired I just want to watch TV or sleep. Still all that said what I get out of being a mummy far out ways the tiredness (most of the time) and I wouldn't change it for the world. When I have a bad day I just tell my self the baby/toddler/preschool phase wont' last forever - and then I'm sure I'll miss it

mumnan

24-10-2007, 10:54 PM

I have been a mum for 22 years and still have 2 daughters at home aged 22 and 16 as well as a 3 year old grandson. I find being a mum satisfying but still crave that me time which does not seem to come very often and when it does it is not long enough.

But I would not be without my children.

Get hubby/partner to mind the children and go for a walk, coffee or chat and tell partner they have no choice.

{I go for a walk mainly to my mums and if they call she tells them she has not seen me. Good old mum}

emilysmumma

24-10-2007, 11:17 PM

Yes it has overflowed me with fullfillment. Having a child answered my question of "why are we here?". To me it's what being a woman is all about and it finally made sense to me once I had DD.

Love it.

sockstealingpoltergeist

25-10-2007, 10:01 AM

I believe it does, being a mum is wonderful I'd like at least one more - to make it 3. I love my kids, thats not saying I don't have other interests. When they are off to school I plan on working part time to, and even while they are little I think you still need to try and do some nice things for your self. Any way enough from me bla blaing.

KATEEK

06-11-2007, 11:53 PM

It is all I have wanted and more.

binti

12-11-2007, 02:44 PM

I love being a mum. I feel so at peace with my decision to have my daughter, I would never go back to my life before her. I enjoyed my life this is just the next step, and it feels right.

loriemae

14-11-2007, 03:29 PM

Yes, being a mother fulfills me emotionally. Seeing my baby smiling and laughing overwhelms me but there are just days that I want to be free of problems with taking care of a family. But that happens sometimes only, especially if tired days comes.

tyler's mum

14-11-2007, 03:40 PM

Not as much as a I thought it would

MrsMiggins

14-11-2007, 03:51 PM

Being a mother is actually very different to how I imagined it being pre-kids. In reality it is much harder; very draining - both physically & emotionally. My children aren't always the perfectly behaved angels I imagined them to be before they were born, there are many sleepless nights, some days I tire of taking an hour to get ready just for a 10 minute trip down the street... the list goes on!

Having said all that however, watching them each & every day is far, far more rewarding than I could ever have imagined. The smallest things have the ability to clinch my heart, stop me in my tracks & completely make my day. Each & every milestone reached makes me beam with pride. Each time my daughter comes running up to me, arms outstretched, calling out "I love you, Mummy!!". Every time my son's face lights up when I walk in the room - those moments more than make up for the times when I truly do feel I could have a day off without them!

naiwen

14-11-2007, 11:31 PM

It does fullfill me but sometimes I wish I had more time to work on other aspects of my life.

Gummibear

16-11-2007, 02:14 PM

Being a mum has exceeded my expectations in many ways - I have felt such outpourings of love and affection, I'm quite sure all my feelings before now pale in comparison.
I have to work part-time (but have a great, flexible work arrangement in a challenging career), and I dread each day I come to work and having to leave my DD in the care of others (grandparents, who, though so lovely, couldn't possibly be the mum I want her to have!). Each time I'm at work I wish I was at home again. BUT, sometimes at home when things are a little tough, I do appreciate my little escape that I have to work. I'm sure I would wish for it even more if I didn't have it. A little bit of me time goes a long way for me...

But overall I didn't see having children as my end goal in life. It is just a happy milestone on my whole life's journey. A pretty major and fulfilling one though. There are lots of things I have done in life already, and although I didn't have anything planned since giving birth, I feel a real need inside to do more and achieve more personally. So I shall keep exploring the world and challenging myself to keep myself fulfilled. I figure a positive and happy mum will be a much greater role model than one who feels more is needed to be happy.

In general, I love how everyone has different views on this topic. It's what makes us all unique individuals - the world would be pretty boring if we were all the same now!

:)

luckymama

16-11-2007, 03:41 PM

Yes very much so. I am loving it a lot, and it is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Becoming a mother has made me a much better person and ive never been happier :D

mummy01

01-01-2008, 03:56 PM

I agree. Some days i crave a day to myself without anyone relying on me for anything. But the rest of the time it's amazing. It's the best job in the world. The way your child looks and smiles at you is the greatest.

Susan Mac

01-01-2008, 04:01 PM

This is what I was born for.

Occasionally I remember how much easier is was before, or I think I miss teaching, or whatever, and then I think: nope, I love what I've got too much. WOuldn't swap it for the world.

4B2L

01-01-2008, 07:33 PM

Angike

01-01-2008, 07:39 PM

I feel the same as Susan - I feel as if I was born to be a mother.

Sure, there's times when I would like to have a shower alone, not be woken up at 6 am and be able to eat my dinner without feeding somone else but I would never want to go back to the days of not having a child.

I couldn't imagine not waking up to DS and giving him his breakfast and washing his beautiful little face etc.

Pinky81

26-07-2008, 10:23 AM

Motherhood has made me feel emotions I never knew existed. The love I have for my DD is bigger than I could have ever imagined. Nothing I did in my previous life will ever be more important than watching her grow and learn. Yes I have had hard days where I feel like some adult company but this can be done while DD is around also. I look forward to all the mummy things I get to do in the years to come and know that eventually I will gain some of my once had independance back and miss the day that I was so needed by my daughter.

annabellesmummy

26-07-2008, 10:38 AM

Falling pregnant at 18yrs old I rarely thought of what life would be like with a child. But in those rare moments I could never have imagined what its really like!
Only another mother can understand the true beauty of it.

Being a mother has shown me what we are really here for. ie: breast feeding, having a child has shown me what your breast are actually there for lol!!!
I truely believe with all my heart we are here to do this and everything else is just a bonus, career, cars, money etc all bonus' ;)

I often ask what I did that was so fantastic to deserve such a blessing, Annabelle :D

Mummaholic

26-07-2008, 10:53 AM

Kazamataz

26-07-2008, 06:48 PM

I was emotionally fulfilled before I had my children.
They along with my DH are just an added bonus to my life.

I actually find it a bit unsettling when I hear people say there DH and their child complete them or fulfill them.

IMO Its dangerous to have so much of yourself wrapped up in others.
If your not a whole person without them what would you do if they were suddenly taken away?

annabellesmummy

26-07-2008, 07:57 PM

4B2L

27-07-2008, 10:12 AM

I actually find it a bit unsettling when I hear people say there DH and their child complete them or fulfill them.

IMO Its dangerous to have so much of yourself wrapped up in others.
If your not a whole person without them what would you do if they were suddenly taken away?

Dangerous? Family is what life is all about for me. I

was not complete until I had my family.

My kids are not a bonus...they are what life is all about....nice car, nice home etc, etc are what I call a bonus.

If they were suddenly all taken away...I probally wouldn't be here myself.

Ronni78

27-07-2008, 08:10 PM

Yes and more...

I always knew I would have kids some day and that I'd love it. And I do, I am so in love with my kids.

Yes, I was complete within myself before I had them, but when they came along, I became more than myself, IYKWIM.

I have single friends who live exciting lives travelling the world and I know that if I'd never had kids, I would be with them right now. But if I were to weigh up my life now and what could have been, my life now with my children wins hands down. Not even a competition.

They are my world now and I would not trade that for anything!!! :kiss::valentine: :hugs:oh I'm so mushy!!!

Kazamataz

27-07-2008, 11:38 PM

Dangerous? Family is what life is all about for me. I

was not complete until I had my family.

My kids are not a bonus...they are what life is all about....nice car, nice home etc, etc are what I call a bonus.

If they were suddenly all taken away...I probally wouldn't be here myself.

Exactly my point IMO not a good thing.

Family is not what my life is all about family is a big part of my life, But it isn't my life.

I think you are totally misunderstanding what I mean by bonus.

I came into this world with nothing and I to will leave with nothing.

Anything that adds to making my life a joyful, loving, memorable, fantastic, (I could go on) experience is a bonus when considering that I had nothing to begin with.

You don't know that you won't be here if your family was suddenly taken away and I hope you never have to face that situation.

Kazamataz

27-07-2008, 11:42 PM

I was a hole person before becoming a mother but I wouldn't be a hole person if Annabelle was taken from me :no:

I think being involved and thriving on motherhood is very different to wrapping myself in it.
Kazamataz- we have different views as I think everything else in life is a bonus not my DP and DD :cool:

Again missing my point, 4B2L's example was the very thing I was talking about she said her life is family.

I think their is a huge difference between being involved and thriving on motherhood and wrapping yourself in it.

If you make it your life, meaning you have nothing else then that IMO is a dangerous thing.

And everyone and everything in my life is a Bonus because I come from the point of view that I entered the world with nothing and I will leave with nothing.

4B2L

28-07-2008, 07:58 AM

Exactly my point IMO not a good thing.

Family is not what my life is all about family is a big part of my life, But it isn't my life.

I think you are totally misunderstanding what I mean by bonus.

I came into this world with nothing and I to will leave with nothing.

Anything that adds to making my life a joyful, loving, memorable, fantastic, (I could go on) experience is a bonus when considering that I had nothing to begin with.

You don't know that you won't be here if your family was suddenly taken away and I hope you never have to face that situation.

Thats fine. I got your point originally, and I understood what you said.

When you call it 'dangerous' I think it is only right that I reply.

Some may find your way of looking at things a little unsettling.:cool:

Many, many people think of their children as their whole life.....and I actually think that is the very least my children deserve.

Anyway...we obviously value our families in very different ways...and that's fine.:)

mum2bubba

28-07-2008, 02:01 PM

I'm still searching......

I love my kids more than anything but I think if anything I have lost alot of myself since having them. I know that might sound weird or even harsh and I certainly don't regret having them but before they came along I had a life (I still have one now but its changed) back then I was searching to fill a void in my life (ever since my mum died I have been trying to fill a void) and I thought having kids might help, I guess it did in some ways but not totally. Like I said, I am still searching.

macsum2

18-08-2008, 11:02 AM

I found when i had my 1st daughter at 19 I loved her to bits however found parenthood a bit of a burden and was in the way of me having a good time. With my 2nd daughter nearly 10 years later i have found it so much more fulfilling and relaxing. I love being at home with my girls and cant stand being away from either of them!! I have obviously grown up!!

thatgirl

12-09-2008, 06:31 AM

Yes, it has but so much more than I ever thought it would. I feel compleat now I have my DS.

pinkgingham

12-09-2008, 07:55 AM

fulfilling absolutely :D

sometimes i wish i was able to do my own thing but i dont wish for my old life back, i didnt really have one before my kids. my life is better now since i have had my kids. they make me happier than i have ever been. wouldnt change it for the world.

miloand4

12-09-2008, 09:17 AM

Of all the jobs I have ever had this one has always been the most fullfilling for me. I feel like it is what I am meant to do so it fullfills me :D

floodprincess

12-09-2008, 09:32 AM

I had to say no...I was a reluctant mum when I had DD1 (I knew I wasn't ready both emotionally and financially) however, I didn't like my other options.

That said, I've loved every minute that Tiffani has been in my life - would not trade THAT for anything.

Now that I'm older and wiser; I find that with a great balance of work; I'm in a job that I wouldn't trade for all the world and life; Tiffani has grown into a beautiful, confident 10yr old - I am almost EXACTLY where I imagined I would be.

Come February when DH & I have solidified our mortgage and brought miracle #2 (this one I'm ready for) into our world, I will be exactly where I saw myself being!

jo-anne.36

12-09-2008, 06:19 PM

:wave: i can'nt comment as iam not a mother :(i wish thanks jojo

melbryan

12-09-2008, 06:30 PM

i Had a horror of a kid ( Ds1) and every day I thought is this it???
I would think if my children were quiet and sat still for a moment and weren't so demanding I might love this job but they aren't in the slightest like this. Mum said I was a great little kid never needed reprimanding silly me thought I'd get one of those kids how wrong I was.
I do reckon kids are born with a special character of there own and it is their make up I just never got that child that had a quiet demeanor.
Maybe for me the best is yet to come, I am not going to judge my life as a mum as my kids are only 4,2,1 and one on the way. Not a real fan of the toddlers though. Just me though.
Come back to me when I think mt job is done around 18 years.

NibbleCurlynBun

12-09-2008, 06:34 PM

Oh it sure does!!

Its not as fulfilling as far as SLEEP is concerned though... :o

rowiechb

17-09-2008, 08:59 AM

I voted not as much as I thought. I thought, I would not want/need anything else in my life but my child. I feel now I need something else for ME:)

Ys_Woman

17-09-2008, 01:26 PM

I voted YES-definitely.
I guess that is why we are given fertility*, and the reason we pair off with the opposite sex*.
I have been at this parenting thing for 21 years now and I really feel it was the main reason I was put on the earth.
Do I have interests outside of parenting that are purely selfish? You bet! lol. I love singing in musical theatre productions and I come home feeling able to give more to my family when I am happy.

Amy:)
*stated without prejudice to those struggling with infertility or who pair off with the same sex*.

ladybugblue84

20-09-2008, 08:14 AM

Yes for sure! Its the one "job" I feel is important. Its also fun and exciting. I look forward to each & everyday & having my little girl by my side when I achieve things makes it so much better. When I go back to work I'll be working for my family to give us a better life & that will make working so much more fulfilling as well!

ACT1

20-09-2008, 03:21 PM

Yes, absolutely, so much more than I could have ever imagined and wish I could continue that role for always.

JellybeanLOVER

20-09-2008, 03:43 PM

I picked yes definitely. I would say it has been more fulfilling and amazing then I ever thought possible.

Baby86

24-09-2008, 08:14 PM

To be frank no. I could have waited longer for motherhood. I was still trying to get used to the first one when i found out i was pregnant with the second (so much for the pill working...grrr)

Hopeosh

09-10-2008, 04:08 PM

I'm still PG atm so don't know how I will feel when our little girl is finally here (our first child) but it is good to hear what people's experiences of motherhood are.

I have to admit that I am a little scared about leaving behind my life as I know it. I will be going from a professional, full time worker to a 24 hour a day care giver and I am worried about losing my identity.

Thanks for all the honest feedback, it has really helped to keep me positive about this massive life change!

mrsd

10-10-2008, 08:37 PM

I just wish I had more time to enjoy being a mother !

babygizaiah

11-10-2008, 12:23 AM

I absolutely love motherhood. Even though Im only 22 I never thought that I could have children, because my partner and I had been together for 6yrs and had been trying for a while. The moment I had my son I knew this was it. It was my job to protect this child and give him the best life possible. You dont have to lose yourself when you have a child, you just need to make responsible adjustments. Its all about balance and you can have the best of both worlds. You just need a great support network and a good relationship with your partner and it should be a good journey.

Just enjoy motherhood, take it for what it is and dont over think things. Things happen the way they're suppose to.

sherryn

13-10-2008, 09:15 PM

I always knew i wanted to be a Stay at home mother when i had children and i wanted to beable to enjoy spending everyday with them and have the time to sit back and just enjoy it which i am i always knew kids went through there frustrating stages but some how we manage it and its everything i thought it would be and so much more

jjnella

17-10-2008, 07:45 AM

I voted no, im thinking its because we are in the middle of the terrible terrible 2s and have to admit im finding motherhood very difficult at the moment and still always trying to find a balance with everything.

cassvanm

17-10-2008, 08:38 PM

I voted not as much as I thought, simply coz I need more in my life than my kids.
As much as I love my girls, and that my world revolves around them, I need to work and I need my social life also!
I'm also one of those mummy's who don't mind dropping my kids off to care, and can't wait til next year coz DD1 is going to school. I don't NEED to be a mother to exist.
I'm not sure if that answers the question or not, but there you go!

MumtoChloe

18-10-2008, 12:23 PM

I voted yes - definitely. But it has actually fulfilled me more that I thought it would! My daughter is only 3wks old, but from the moment I held her in my arms I knew she was the reason I would get up in the morning. No matter what life threw at me I had to keep going if not for myself, but for her. I can't imagine life without her. I'm on :cloud9: 24/7. The lack of sleep is hard, but everyone else gets through it and it doesn't bother me getting up to her at all hours of the night. I get to see and hold my beautiful princess again! It definitely helps having an amazing hubby as well :D I couldn't do it without him!

roxylady

18-10-2008, 02:08 PM

I just realised today how much I enjoy my brain being stimulated! I've found the chores of being a mother quite mind numbing and my son insists I just sit with him while he plays, he is happy to play by himself, but wants me right there. I enjoy being busy with projects and things to do and think about. I've stuggled with just being with motherhood at times, feeling like I'm wanting to be out there kicking life's butt, but knowing how important the job of being at home and raising and loving my son is...

KatiesMum

18-10-2008, 02:24 PM

I have to admit I am quite shocked at the number of people who have said no.

I guess I live in my own little world :o.

It took such a long time to fall pregnant.. being a Mummy is all I dreamed about for such a long time. I cannot imagine my life without my daughter....she is everything to me.

and yes - Motherhood is everything I imagined and more. It fulfills me in ways I never thought.

I guess this thread also makes me realise how lucky I am that I can work, and that I have close family around and a very supportive DH, so I can have a break. It does make me appreciate my DD much much more, makes motherhood a wonderful experience when you can have a break and some 'me time'.

I feel so much for singly mummies without that support.

zenifa

18-10-2008, 10:43 PM

I don't think that any situation, be it becoming a Mum, or landing that high paying job can bring emotional fulfillment if you didn't have it before.

Being a Mum has enriched my life incredibly, and there is nothing that could ever take the place of my children..

but emotional fulfillment?.. no, I don't think being a Mum did that for me.. I think I was a pretty complete person before I had children... I now just feel my life is exceedingly enriched.:yes:

:iagree:
I tried to find emotional fulfillment myself and having DH and my two DDs in my life has just enriched that.

Being a mother is actually very different to how I imagined it being pre-kids. In reality it is much harder; very draining - both physically & emotionally. My children aren't always the perfectly behaved angels I imagined them to be before they were born, there are many sleepless nights, some days I tire of taking an hour to get ready just for a 10 minute trip down the street... the list goes on!

Having said all that however, watching them each & every day is far, far more rewarding than I could ever have imagined. The smallest things have the ability to clinch my heart, stop me in my tracks & completely make my day. Each & every milestone reached makes me beam with pride. Each time my daughter comes running up to me, arms outstretched, calling out "I love you, Mummy!!". Every time my son's face lights up when I walk in the room - those moments more than make up for the times when I truly do feel I could have a day off without them!

:iagree:

I have found motherhood to be many things, but my biggest surprise was not how it emotionally fulfilled me, but how much it has changed me.
It is the hardest yet the most rewarding job I've ever had. It is emotionally, psychologically and physically demanding, affects all of your other relationships including the one with yourself.
The daily grind of monotony and repetitive tasks involved in childrearing, lack of sleep, and lack of time for yourself is difficult in those early years.

There are so many rewards, seeing my girls' faces light up when they see me, their kisses and cuddles, it makes it worth it and I must admit, I have been lucky to be both a part time working mum and currently a SAHM.

Not sure I expected emotional fulfillment from motherhood, so I guess I'm not surprised if I don't get it. I think my feelings and thoughts towards motherhood, marriage and my children has given me emotional fulfillment rather than the experience of motherhood itself.
Sorry, maybe I am just thinking too much.

RozelleMum77

21-10-2008, 01:12 PM

I voted no...I struggle though most days as a mum. I love my kids so much and wouldn't live without them BUT I do find it very hard. I always wanted kids but haven't thrived in the role of mum. I am finding I have no patience and am pretty cranky a lot of the time. I have to make a concerted effort to keep myself together...

Bellasmama

21-10-2008, 02:41 PM

I voted Yes - definately but I have to admit that is my overall opinion.

My DD is one of the most gorgeous beautifully behaved children who has a smile permantly attached to her beautiful face :yelclap:however we have had many a problem with sleep etc (as we do!) :hair:and there are days I question myself: Am I failing? What am I doing wrong and so forth however in hindsight most of these questions are posed when I am my most sleep deprived and exhausted and frustrated state so it is no wonder we can feel like that on those days.

In saying that, I had always wanted to be a Mama and I would never have it any other way DD and DH are my life and there is nothing I wouldnt do for them and there is nothing else that can evoke an emotional response from me like watching my daughter laugh and at the same token comforting her when she cries.

I think a lot of how we feel can be linked to the amount of support we feel we are receiving at any one time by our partners, family & friends - well that is what I have perceived about myself. The deeper our emotional attachment we have the deeper our emotional response - good and bad.

All in all I think all devoted mothers are amazing and I have the utmost repect for us all - the cliche is true (both of them)

Being a mother is the hardest job in the world &
The most rewarding

twopink

24-10-2008, 02:47 PM

I think everyone (including myself) was very surprised when I turned out to be the mother I am. I always thought I would find the need for a career too strong to resist and I would go back to work quickly (especially considering how much study I have done!).

But as your situation changes, I think the way you reach emotional fulfillment changes. I used to get a lot of fulfillment from my academic achievements, and then from working hard, and even playing soccer. But these days, I could not be more emotionally fulfilled than I am now as I stay at home and raise my two beautiful DD's. I have honestly never cried and laughed (often in the same day) since DD1 was born.

Sure there are times when I feel I want to go to work...because I do get tired of life at home. But at the same time I would hate to miss all the important things as they grow up.

So emotional fulfillment...yes definitely...but balance in life...perhaps not...it's something I'm working on...:)

princessbabyangel

26-10-2008, 06:23 AM

Hi I'm 22 and fell pregnant at 20 having just accepted a degree in dentistry and booked a overseas holiday I was definately not prepared for the double lines! But all of that seems pointless and unimportant now as I nuture my 13mth old at home - she gives me more love and enjoyment then anything ever could. I plan on being a dedicated stay at home parent untill she is atleast three. I'm as hardworking, motivated and committed a mother as I was a student and worker! It felt to me like my world ended and I would never live my life again but I realised my life wasn't being lived untill my angel came into my world. Absolutely no regrets, but no plan to have more. As for my career, I will pursue my passions but only around my daughters needs.

Mischaswonderland

29-10-2008, 09:11 PM

i voted for yes- but i have days where id like to go back the the days before i was a mumma..

i love being my little xandy bears mum...he is so precious and the most loving child i have ever known...he doesnt go more than an hour without telling me 'i wuv j00 mummy' and my heart melts everytime, the day he goes to preschool i miss him and cant wait for 3.30 to come around so i can go and get him.

BUT having said that sometimes i remember back when it was just dh and i. and we could go and do what we want...see a movie, go and see a band all on a quick fun decision...not hafto plan weeks before hand, not hafto rely on anyone to look after my choices! sometimes when its a saturday night and theres nothing on tv i think about what i would have done...

but then my pumpkin pie comes in with his pencil case and his paper and asks me to draw with him and i'm straight back to thanking god i have this wonderful little man in my life.

mummy7

30-10-2008, 11:40 AM

Being a mother has fulfilled me so... much more than I ever imagined. I think motherhod has made me a better person by teaching me selflessness and the true meaning of unconditional love. :bee:
I am gratefull for every day I spend w my lil champion.

Bubmum

03-11-2008, 11:00 AM

I would never go back to my pre-child days. I did everything in the world I wanted to do before I had my girl, and she is showing me how beautiful life is with family.

ThomasMum

04-11-2008, 08:57 AM

I have posted my answer when I was still working part time (2 days/week) and now I am a full time mom, and the answer still the same: YES it does :yes:

tchip81

05-11-2008, 09:29 AM

There is nothing more fulfilling, than having a happy and content baby.
I thought motherhood was going to be hard, I was so wrong.. Im am happier than I have ever been.
This is the best moment in my life to date at the moment, I would not change a thing...:thumbsup:

Zanideu

07-11-2008, 01:15 PM

There are definate days of really high ups and very deep lows. I love my lil bug more than almost anything. But motherhood feels sometimes like it takes more from me than what it gives. I know that motherhood is the ultimate selfless act, and I don't even want to imagine what my hubby's life and mine would be like without him. But it is hard. And I really do stuggle sometimes.

lovbemummy!

12-11-2008, 10:57 AM

Motherhood is the most wonderful, amazing and hardest thing I've ever done. I love my babies so much. I never imagined what being a mother would be like, I guess I really didn't think about it - no expectations, except for it to be hard. But theres nothing like it when your 3yr old DS comes up to you and says 'I love you mummy' and gives you a kiss :hugs:without any prompting. Its so beautiful, it melts the darker moments out. I honestly can't remember what life was like before kids - except we spend a lot of money on stuff!

MelindaJem

24-11-2008, 05:51 PM

Definately - im loving every minute!!
Cant imagine having to leave him to go back to work...

erinsydneymum

24-11-2008, 06:12 PM

i love being a Mum but constantly worry that the mistakes i make will impact my daughters adversely in the future, either when they become adults or teenagers. I keep wondering if they will realise that i am a hopeless mother.

hazelsmummy

24-11-2008, 06:23 PM

Do you find emotional fulfillment when you had children - or are you still searching!

I dont place all my emotional needs on the child. But I have currently found emotional fulfilment from my DP, my extended family, and my freinds. Hazel completes it:yes:.

Although i suppose I am still searching as I would like some more intimate friendships. But isnt that the western way? We always want something more:rolleyes:.

Id say my life is definitely the closest to perfect it ever has been and as my family expands Im sure it will just get even better.

:detective:

I like this post. Things are looking good.

proudmama

27-11-2008, 08:15 PM

i do - but of my friends that i went to school with - and were hangin around with when i was pregnant - none of them have kids so at first i was envious of them and their ability to party or travel at a moments notice - but then as i met ppl on here and formed a new group of friends i realised it wasn't the be all and end all and i had something much better and only wish they could join me in that

Shayley

28-11-2008, 09:33 AM

Not as much as I thought it would :( my DS was unplanned, and while I love him more than anything in the world, there are some days I wish I could go back to the child free days.
That said, on the one day a week he is in daycare, I usually find myself missing him so much - I dont think I'd feel complete without him. He brings so much happiness and love into my life. But I don't feel completely fulfilled being a SAHM, especially doing it on my own. Some days I love, some days I find completely mundane (sounds bad I know). I miss the company of other adults, miss spontaneity, miss selfishness! And hate dealing with the neverending tamtrums and whinging!!! I feel as though I need to do more with my life than "just" being Alex's mummy. That said, I love all the special moments, and I wouldnt want to miss out on them for anything in the world.

Rissa79

28-11-2008, 01:20 PM

When I was younger and dreamt about becoming a wife and mother I thought that it would give me the ultimate fulfilment of my emothional needs. I couldn't imagine needing anything else.

Now I am a happily married wife and mother to 3 very loved and adored children, I know that my expectations were unrealistic. I love being a mum however know that for me it does not fullfill all my emotional needs. I still need other people and things in my life to fulfill me. I would never want to go back to the pre-kid days as I love being a mother, but being a mother is not all that I am and placing all my emotional expectations on the role was just unhealthy for me.