DH away for three months - advice?

[draught]

My DH has a fantastic opportunity to work overseas for three months and is off in a couple of weeks. We have explained it to the children and told them that we will talk to him on the phone and via webcam all the time, and when he will be coming home (after X number of birthdays and before Xmas :rolleyes: )

Any other advice on preparing a 4 1/2 year old, nearly 3 year old and 9 month old for their father's departure for that long? We are quite prepared for the fact that DS won't know him when he returns but the girls are old enough to stay in touch with him I think.......but anything we haven't thought of would be great!!

[busymummyof4]

I think you've done really well so far with the preparation of DH's departure. Getting the web cam set up is a great idea. Yr elder children will get a real kick out of that as will your DH.

My DH works away for weeks at a time and has been home for nearly 10 weeks which was a really long and lovely time for us.
:gloomy: he left today for 2 weeks, will be home for 1 and then away again for 2. He mentioned that after that he could be away for 5 weeks.
Its not easy for any of us really but I have taught myself to soldier on with our happy busy lives and I maintain that with the children. As much as they miss him and ask for him, they adjust when he is away.

We set up the web cam but have found that it is hard for them to see and speak to their dad when its suitable for him and vice versa based on different time frames and his work commitments. He spends a lot of time in hotels and that makes it difficult to access the internet sometimes.

Maybe take lots of pictures to put on a wall or fridge with them all together.

Its not going to be all that easy for them but they will adjust to it for the time needed. Kids are resilient - mine have taught me that.

Good luck with everything.

[draught]

Thank you!
We are used to him travelling a lot with work but for the last 9 months or so he has been home more than he has been away and we have all become used to it. We have a slide show of photos on the lap top on the kitchen table already - shows the last four years of our life - so they talk about the photos and people already, so that will be good with him being away. They are used to using webcam to talk to their grandparents and friends from Qld so that is good.

I agree that they are pretty resilient - and thank you again for the support!

[Little_Toad]

Draught, when we were little my Dad used to be away quite a bit for long times too. I have to say it didn't effect us and we didn't forget who he was.

Just got very exciting when he was coming home.
There was always a present at the end of the bed when he got back. Wished he went away more!!

We didnt have a web cam or phone calls from him either so I'm sure they be fne.. they still have a lovely mother taking care of them!

[KaM]

Maybe the kids could make him a special little package in a small box with pictures etc so they are part of him going away.

They could also write letters etc while he is away, sending letters and getting them back can be very exciting for little ones esp when its addressed to them!

[Eloise&Charlie'sMum]

My Dh is in the RAAF so he is away all the time we have a 21 month old and what I found the best things other than the phone calls and the web cam is...

* Iron on tranfer a photo of your DH onto a pillow slip so the kiddes can snuggle up to daddy when they need a hug or go to bed.

* get your DH to video or voice record him reading them stories then at the same time each night sit the kids down for dads story time.

* talk about your Dh as much as possible while he is away..include him in everything possible even though he is not there, constant refference keep him fresh in ther minds at all time.

I hope this helps you xoxoxoxox

[westerner]

Maybe put together a little book of pictures of the kids and there daddy and flick through it every night.. Talk about the pictures and what daddy was doing with them and spot things out etc..

[tickle]

Come up to Queensland for a holiday. :D

[draught]

Thanks - they are all great suggestions - even yours Tickle!

[ThomasMum]

Hi Draught :) long time no see!

I haven't got any useful idea to share really, but the skype and video calls are plenty really, they wont forget their daddy I'm sure, as long your DH can do the video conference on regular basis and on time. Whenever Joshua is overseas for work (he's going to Canada & LA this September and October-altho we are coming with him the October trip) but this what we'd do, morning and afternoon Skypeing.

It seems very hard on us as grown up, but Thomas seems to enjoy it sitting in front of the laptop wondering why his dad is so far away yet he can see him but can not touch him lol its kinda sweet and cute :laughing:

Hey think about me, when I was lil my dad was always away because he worked for the UN, no Skype in those days hehe, all ive got was postcards, but I still love and remember my old man til the day I die :)

Goodluck, come to Sydney and visit us if u like!

:)

[sara-jayne]

hi!
sorry you are gonna be without your DH for so long.
i have often told DF if he ever goes overseas to work (he talks about it often) that i will leave him. he recons now he has a way out if he ever gets sick of me.:laughing:

shane does a 3 on 3 off roster and is often working in areas where he cant call because there are no phones.
while he is away, i keep a diary then when i talk to him i flick thru it and tell him about how katie did a sumersault or went down the big slide by herself. that wy i dont forget things that i want to tell him. it is also good for me because i now have a record of memories of the girls i otherwise might not have.
it also gives me a chance to write how im feeling, im a big believer in keeping a journal or diary for theraputic (sp?) reasons.

i might get to my point some time this year:rolleyes:

with your 4.5yr old, why dont you try writing a diary entry for her? each night befor bed get her to 'tell' daddy what she did for the day and write it in a book for her, she could even start practicing her letters and writing herself or drawing pictures for him.
your 3 yr old probably wont be all that into the idea but seeing big sister doing it might entice some interest.
then when daddy gets home they can give him their diarys so he can catch up on what they have been doing. it might be nice for dad to snuggle up on the lounge with DD and read her diary together.
or every two weeks or so they could post it to them.

good luck with you stint as a single mum.
i hope you dont miss him too much.
:hugs: :hugs: lots of hugs and kisses.:hugs: :hugs: