bit of a dilemma

[Mariposa]

Hi ladies.

My DD1's birthday is coming up in just under 2 weeks, and my (silly) brother has brought her an Ipod Nano. I told him not to go to such an expense for her especially as she will only be turning 8.

Im dissapointed in him as i believe she is too young, and i really dont want to give it to her, but i know my brother and he will keep asking her if she likes it, does she always listen to it etc etc.

IMO these things can wait until they are much older. Im thinking the best thing to do (and i will) is just explain to her that she is too young for it, and she can use it in a couple of years or so.

Is this wrong of me to do?

[Funkychicken]

I agree with you 100 % on this. Turning eight is still in the realm of childhood, not teenage-hood. Ipod's and the like are just not suitable for children.

I have a family member who also gives gifts that I specifically say not to-and I have had to take a really firm line and say NO, you can't give it to him/her-please ask before you go out and buy a big-ticket item.

I would try telling your brother again that it is unsuitable and if he still doesn't listen, tell him plainly that if he does give it to her, you will be taking it off her immediately. Don't back down-this is your child, not his.

[Chelle123]

Is your brother trying to be 'the favourite uncle'?
Maybe try to suggest something else to your brother that would be a more suitable gift and that he can get her the Ipod when she's older.

My MIL is buying my 6yo nephew a TV for his room for Christmas and asked if she could do the same for my DS (just turned 5). I said straight out 'no' and he can have a TV in his room when he starts working and pays for it himself. She's getting him a bike instead - a much more age-appropriate gift IMO.

[Mariposa]

Sal, i have told him that i will be not letting her use it. (still doesnt listen though)

Chelle, i suppose you could say he is trying to be the "favourite uncle". He has already brought it.
I dont blame you about the tv's - no way are my girls allowed to have one in their bedrooms.

[MrsMiggins]

DH insisted on buying his 9yo DD an iPod for her birthday. I was against it, but she is very much 9-going-on-30. :rolleyes:

FWIW, she used it for about a week, found it all just too complicated & doesn't use it at all now. Waste of money!

Perhaps you could explain to your brother that she's too young ATM to get proper use out of it anyway & that if he's really desperate to spend squillions on her, then point him in the direction of something she's already got her heart set on. I know you said he's already bought it, but could he return it do you know? Does he have any other nieces or nephews who could use it?

[Mariposa]

DD1 does act older at times, but shes still a little girl who enjoys playing with dolls and believes in fairies!

He refused point blank to take it back, and as for giving it to one of the many nieces and nephews the older ones already have them, and the others are much younger than DD1.

I think at this age they are a definite waste of money also.

maybe i should see how she goes with it? idk.........most likely not though.

[Elfin]

Your brother should not of bought something like that without consulting you first. But alot of kids that age have ipods as they like to listen to music, I think it is part of the techno age we live in. My nieces did so it is not that uncommon. Maybe you could just ask your brother to hold on to it till the next year, or ask him to get something else.

I have an MP3 player that I let my son use, I would actually rather him listen to that than the radio. There is no shock jock rubbish and the music is stuff I am quite comfortable with him listening too. So he doesn't have his own but he has to listen to the music I like. At least it keeps him entertained in the car. He is 8 too and is really starting music and I can remember buying records around this time too.

If it was me I would let her have it under strict supervision though *ducks for cover*

[Mariposa]

no need to duck for cover Elfin:) DD1 loves her music also, but i think an ipod is a bit over the top for an 8yr old

[Bessie]

Hi Maria
I don't know, I was considering buying one for DD, although she is a bit older.
Think of it this way, at least you can control what she listens to, just upload things you approve of. That's what I was thinking with DD (since then I have bought her a heap of books and can no longer afford the ipod).
Music is good for kids, just check out the lyrics and she will be OK. It's great she has an uncle who loves her so much, my bro' just signs the card and his partner sends the gifts.
Take care x

[Becteria]

Its wrong of your brother to contradict your parenting. with his gift choice.

I know there is a cheaper option take off of the pods that are suoitable for younger girls. its about $40 at target or one of those stores,..

[Mariposa]

I spoke with my brother again today, he is adamant that hes not changing his mind (men!) I think i will let her use it hoping that she gets bored with it....:o

[Elfin]

That is probably the best way to go like I and others said at least you can control what she is listening too:)

[pegasus]

I too am definitely against the idea of a tv in the room or things like that. The fact that my DSK's have their own tv's, dvd players and whatever else their hearts desire, does not mean my kids will have the same.

However, thinking of it (being such an old person that I am;) ) I got my first transistor radio at 7 then moved onto a walkman, then a discman...

I'm thinking an IPod (or probably moreso an MP3) is in the realm of the purchase of a walkman now.

Would need to be monitored very closely, but if you only download cd's you already have (that's the only kind of music I have on mine), then I guess it's no different to any portable music player

What would annoy me most, is the fact that my brother had gone against my wishes and if I was getting my child one of those presents, I would want to be the person giving it to her so it was her "special" present that year.

[PunkyDiva]

Ask him for the receipt for warranty purposes and return it for a refund and use to buy something else more appropriate. Maybe he would get the message then.
Harsh aren't I but I hate it when people ignore your requests and desires for your child.

Just a sidetrack about headphones for ipods etc, if others can hear the music then it's too loud and causing ear damage, no joke, that's all it takes.