View Full Version : Where do you think you will be in 10yrs??
SweetSerenity
02-08-2007, 11:02
Hey ladies..
As a single mum, where do you think you will be in ten years and/or where do you want to be in 10 years?
Do you think you will still be single living happily with your child/ren??
Do you think you would have found someone by then and be coupled up with the man of your dreams with maybe more children?
It's something I have been thinking about lately.
I think I will definately be purchasing my own home in 10 years time :) That's something I definately will be making happen.
Regarding another man, I'm not too sure. I think there's a huge possibility that I will be partnered up but I'm not too sure about more children.
The thought of more children does scare me a bit.
So tell me your thoughts :)
Love Nat xxx
PS: We will have to come back to this thread 10yrs down the track and see if things happened the way we thought lol :laughing:
oleander
02-08-2007, 12:06
I think I will be re-married to someone beyond my expectations and have two more beautiful children. I will be running my own business from home. I will have a new house with a swimming pool and a big outdoor entertaining area.:D
In 10 years time I hope to have found someone and have had 1 or 2 more kids. I also hope to own(well be paying off) a home.
in ten years time I think and know that I will own my own home, have my third precious bub(who will hopefully be about 7 lol) and have a fantastic hubby:D(and if he is a solicitor even better ;)*)
*lol see other thread :D
sunnyflower
02-08-2007, 12:44
I would like to have met someone by then and maybe have one more child.I would like to buy my own home.Apart from that i'm not really sure!!
MissBrightside
02-08-2007, 14:35
Will hopefully be married to someone wonderful. Ive never had a wedding before so it would be exciting!
Have a nice comfortable home to live in and maybe an investment property or two.
Not sure about more kids, depends who I meet and what our plans are together first.
I would also like to travel overseas in the future as Ive only ever been on a plane once to QLD. A nice romantic holiday with the guy of my dreams.
:laughing: Don't know if any of that will ever happen but its nice to have dreams of what life could be like. If I end up single for the next ten years or the rest of my life then so be it. I'll be happy either way. But Im sure theres someone out there waiting for me.:fingerscrossed:
lilCsmummy
02-08-2007, 15:01
I really think that I know what im looking for in a man now. I was young when I met my ex and we were both partying and drinking and when I fell pregnant and had bubba, I really changed and had different priorities to him. He just stayed the same and didn't want the responsibility. So in a good way I have really learnt the qualities I want in a man now.
So hopefully I will be married to the man of my dreams who actually prefers being a father instead of a carefree lil boy.
frayzlilso
02-08-2007, 15:09
:yes: Nat, I'm with you, the idea of having another baby scares me a bit too!
I'd like to be independent. I'd like my career to be panning out well for me, making good money, be making mortgage payments on my first home, have a DD who is happy at school and enjoying friends, and I'm *still* practicing yoga.
What I think will happen ... I dont know.
I'm hesitant in saying I'd like to get married again, the idea of being involved with someone is a little scary ...
but having said that, I think I should fess up to saying I do *want* to be in a relationship with someone again LOL
SweetSerenity
02-08-2007, 15:09
I really think that I know what im looking for in a man now. I was young when I met my ex and we were both partying and drinking and when I fell pregnant and had bubba, I really changed and had different priorities to him. He just stayed the same and didn't want the responsibility. So in a good way I have really learnt the qualities I want in a man now.
So hopefully I will be married to the man of my dreams who actually prefers being a father instead of a carefree lil boy.
You just explained my history!
My ex husband sounds very similar to yours and I totally know what you mean now of knowing what you want in a man.
And you and I are the same age... thats freaky!! lol:laughing: .
SweetSerenity
02-08-2007, 15:12
:yes: Nat, I'm with you, the idea of having another baby scares me a bit too!
I'd like to be independent. I'd like my career to be panning out well for me, making good money, be making mortgage payments on my first home, have a DD who is happy at school and enjoying friends, and I'm *still* practicing yoga.
What I think will happen ... I dont know.
I'm hesitant in saying I'd like to get married again, the idea of being involved with someone is a little scary ...
but having said that, I think I should fess up to saying I do *want* to be in a relationship with someone again LOL
Yep I'm totally the same.
I want to be an independent single parent, provide everything for my son and I on my own and show that it can be done.
At the same time, I do want to be in a relationship again too though lol.
I always think to myself, what if I put off wanting a man till Peter is in high school and I have a house for us and am financially stable and then keep my options open for a relationship, but then what if no one wants me by then lol :laughing: .
Can't win! :p
frayzlilso
02-08-2007, 15:14
But what I want to know is, how does the new relationship dynamic fit around being a Mum? All I've known before is being completely absorbed in the other person etc. etc. partying, going out lots, mucking around with friends...
... now I'm boring and a Mum :D lol
SweetSerenity
02-08-2007, 15:22
But what I want to know is, how does the new relationship dynamic fit around being a Mum? All I've known before is being completely absorbed in the other person etc. etc. partying, going out lots, mucking around with friends...
... now I'm boring and a Mum :D lol
Well my best friend ... She was a single mum too, her little girl is 5 months younger than peter. She started seeing this guy last year and he would go to her place most nights, have dinner together, he interacted with her daughter very well and she adored him...
Now over a year later, they are engaged, live together, and are expecting their first child together in December :D Her daughter now calls him dad and he treats her like she's his own... Her real father lives hours away and doesn't see her much... but she started calling my best friends fiance "dad" on her own.
So I think in the end, it comes down to the man wanting to be apart of our little families that we already have. Not saying they have to want to have more children, or be a father to our children, but they have to want to be a part of not just our lives, but our childrens and be a big part in both of our lives.
So sure they get the relationship with us, but in order for it to work, they have to be willing to have a relationship with our children and we have to be willing to let them have a relationship with our child.
Hope I make sense :o
frayzlilso
02-08-2007, 15:32
So sure they get the relationship with us, but in order for it to work, they have to be willing to have a relationship with our children and we have to be willing to let them have a relationship with our child.
Hope I make sense :o
:yes: yes, perfect sense.
And its nice to hear about your friends story - it means that it does happen! LOL
... and DD means that my priorities are going to be soooooooo very different now
SweetSerenity
02-08-2007, 15:39
:yes: yes, perfect sense.
And its nice to hear about your friends story - it means that it does happen! LOL
... and DD means that my priorities are going to be soooooooo very different now
Yep that's right.
I think having a child is a good thing.
We become more picky, they have to have particular qualities in them that we would not look for if we were childless. Therefore we don't give any idiots the time of day lol :p
the_original_duchess
02-08-2007, 15:59
in 10 years i will have achieved all of my goals. i'll have the knock down rebuild dnoe on my house. have finished uni and be working as a midwife, bringing babies into the world everyday!
i will have married mr right, not mr right now. hopefully have another 2 kids (i want 5, but have to wqait for my body to recover from my last 3 pregnancies, if i had another one too soon, it'd kill me)
ummm what else, i woulld have been to europe, and the USA for a holiday.
and most importantly, i will be happy
OneBabyBoy
02-08-2007, 16:36
This is what I would like to happen: I think I would really like to fall in love again, although I know that I would be scared and hesitant. I would not get married but be in a happy long term relationship, maybe have another baby around the 35 age mark (so the baby would have just been born in 10 years). I would hope that we would have bought our own place and have an actual backyard for the kids to play in and have friends over for bbq's and stuff. I would like to have been working as a fully qualified Auslan interpreter by then, be really involved in the deaf community and have made lots of friends. My DS will be almost 11 and he'll be a lovely, well behaved and considerate little man. And we would have just been to Disneyland for his 10th birthday.
This is what will probably happen: Hopefully I will have been able to save enough to buy a little apartment or something and be living there happily with my DS. Still single. Hopefully the parts about work and DS turning out well are still the same.
Either option is good because we are happy and stable in both.
10 years...
I want to of been married for at least a few years... be with a man who respects me and treats me right... a man who finds it a privelege to provide for his family not a chore... have another child or maybe more... Living in a house we own... Not struggling financially... Finished my bacholor of midwifery... Oh and of had no more abuse from my ex.
This would be a dream come true...
moonblossom
02-08-2007, 16:53
I know in ten years time I will be still working as a Doula, but also would of been to Uni to get my Midwife Degree.
I will be living in a house I own. And still probably single because I couldn't be bothered having a man intrupt my happiness LOL
I will have money in the bank. I will be a grandmother again. I will be happy as I am now and hopefully become a Homebirth Midwife.
Life is good now, as it will be then. :smiliedance:
lilCsmummy
02-08-2007, 17:52
And you and I are the same age... thats freaky!! lol:laughing: .
Are you from brissy sweet serenity? Maybe we were with the same guy lol.:laughing:
Now over a year later, they are engaged, live together, and are expecting their first child together in December :D Her daughter now calls him dad and he treats her like she's his own... Her real father lives hours away and doesn't see her much... but she started calling my best friends fiance "dad" on her own.
This is what happened with me. My "dad" met my Mum when I was 15 mths. My biological father lives in Melbourne and I never see him. I started calling my Dad, Dad when my lil sister started too. He has never treated us any diferent then eachother. You would never know me and my sis have different Dad's.
And also they always told me the truth. Which I think is the key. You hear about families who tell the kid's they have different fathers when they are like 18 or something. I think that would be terrible.
In 10 years I HOPE to be married, in a beautiful house, with another child or two, loved and adored by my husband.
I can wish cant I?
I'll be a successful Child Psychologist, earning lots of money! Possibly married by then, and madly in love. Not too sure about the kids situation though... currently i'm thinking i don't want any more. But that might change once i meet the right guy, have finished my courses and am over 30. Oh and I will be on the way to owning my own house i should hope! :p
*munchkin*
02-08-2007, 21:46
In 10 years time my DD will be 11 years old! She will be happy, healthy, and loving life, and we will have a great relationship. (she will always be the true REAL love of my life).
I will be back at work full time, and forever grateful and appreciate of being able to pay the bills with ease. We will be able to afford some beach holidays with good friends and family, and I will be saving to take DD trekking in Nepal when she is older. I will go out to the movies and dinner every now and then, and have a social life.
I will have paid off half my house, and possibly...maybe....have met someone incredible who is an amazing father. We will have a 4 year old child together...I'll be an old mum, but so glad I got the chance to have another child.
ashleerose
02-08-2007, 23:13
In ten years i will be 41.
My kids, family and myself are all alive and in good health and happy if not wealthy.
I would love to have had another child by then (recently looked into having another child through ivf), but decided that if its meant to be fate will of course ensure that i have one.
Hopefully my ex and his family leave the kids and I alone (we have been through so much and are still going through so much because of them).
It would be nice to think that i could possibly be living in a house that i would be in the process of owning (if i am lucky enough to get one decent full time permanant job), so that i could afford the repayments (have no trouble in getting a deposit, just the repayments seem so far out of my reach).
But if i am not i hope that the kids and i are still in this house (community housing).
I do so hope that i get a decent full time job i have so many certificates and i have had a good work record but living here its so hard getting any work at all because its not what i know but who i know.
As for being in another relationship i do have those silly moments when i think it would be nice to find someone and then reality of course smacks me in the face.
But either way i am happy with just the kids and i as it is.
SweetSerenity
03-08-2007, 08:20
Are you from brissy sweet serenity? Maybe we were with the same guy lol.:laughing:
Lol no Sydney here :)
It's scary to think in 10yrs time I will be going on 32 and my beautiful, gorgeous boy will be turning into an official teenager... 13!!!!:eek: Now that's scary!
icthesky
03-08-2007, 09:24
I am going to sort of burst everyone's bubble. Lets look at some of the market forces at play and look into the proverbial crystal ball:
Due to shortage in land, population growth and inflation, a normal suburban house which cost now around $280 thousand (nothing flashy, which cost around $150 thousand 5 years ago) will cost around $700 to $800 thousand. Like in Britain, very few people will be able to afford their own place.
I've owned two houses in my life. Each time we sold it, because we moved, and each time we had to re-buy, the prices almost doubled. Currently I am renting and at the age of 37 realize that if I do not buy my own place within the next 2 years (max), the window will probably close, unless I run into some really good money (working on that :)).
It is good to dream, but if one puts your heart and soul into a dream and it does not realize, it can be devastating. One have to set oneself achievable goals. Each milestone reached will help achieve the next goal. Through this confidence can be built. What we as westerners must realize is that we make up the top 10% of the world's population regarding income, living standards etc. All those things that we take for granted, 90% of the world's population goes without.
Work towards your goals, but keep in mind that circumstances can always change.
So, where do I see myself in 10 Years? Hopefully able to sustain a reasonable living standard. Will I own my own place again? That will depend on my financial performance during the next 12 months. Will I be re-married or in a stable relationship? Yes, I think so. More children? If my partner/wife wants children, I'll be happy to add another soul to the family.
To convert dreams into reality takes commitment and hard work, that includes a relationship.
:( Who invited the party pooper :laughing: :laughing: :laughing: Just kidding, thanks for the reality check icthesky!! Maybe i'll still be renting in 10 years lol
OneBabyBoy
03-08-2007, 12:28
I know what you mean icthesky. I live in Sydney so I think it is probably impossible for me to buy an actual house unless I have a double income. And even then we'd both have to be on really good salaries. Maybe one day I'll escape sydney? If not, yeah I'll probably rent forever.
hayleysmummy
03-08-2007, 13:15
MY WISH OF WHERE I'LL BE IN 10 YEARS
OK I hope to be at least engaged to a wonderful man
Owning my own home would be great but I wouldnt care either way
To have 4 more children
To be financially secure
For my kids to be healthy
Oh and I'd be SAHM for the rest of my life if I could:laughing:
mum2littleman
03-08-2007, 13:23
i think in 10 yrs time i will hopfully be doing sumthing i love with my life my baby will be almost 12 and unlike others here for sumreason i dont think i will find a man that i want to spend the rest of my life with as much as id love to have one around i just have a feeling thats its just going to be my and my son, and since im not having any more babies until im married it will just be the 2 of us.
i would also love to own my own house or be paying it off but just be doing ok- i dont need to be rich i just need to not be struggeling.
o i also want my son and i to be happy!
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