Bad News following Ultrasound or Amnio?

[sanbertina]

What did you do? Continue pregnancy or have an abortion?

I received bad news of feotal abnormalities to my son a few years ago. I carried him until I went into labour and he lived for 4 hours. I got to name him, have a funeral, which was special and grieve accordingly and openly.

I was wondering what other people chose to do put in a situation like mine? How did you cope? Did you feel any kind of pressure from medical professionals? And if you've just received similar bad news what's going on for you right now?

Talk to me....

Sarah,
Mother of 2 here, 1 in heaven, 1 on the way.

[bronny-jane]

ive never done the tests... just wanted to bump this up, for someone who has to help you

[Verdi]

I have never had this happen tome either and i hope someone can help you.

Take care and lots of these :hugs:.

[sam's mum]

I was agonising over the decision after getting our results at 14 weeks. I didn't think that I could through with an abortion, even though I knew that my baby was going to die in the end anyway.

As it happens the decision was taken from my hands (and I thank God that it was). At a check up at 15 weeks there was no heartbeat anymore and so I went in and had a d&c.

The next baby the checks were all fine.

This baby they couldn't get all the nuchal results because the baby wasn't quite big enough. We decided not to bother to go back and get it done again because we wouldn't abort anyway. It was a big thing for me that DH said this to me. The first time he kept saying that it was my choice and he would support, but he wouldn't say what he wanted.

So far all good. The morphology shows that everything is fine.

[Me]

I admire your decision. I hope and pray that I will never be faced with that decision to make, but if I ever was, I think i'd choose the same route as you.

[SixtiesChild]

I think any decision regarding something like this would be an extremely difficult one.
I really admire your courage and strength as there is much grace & beauty in letting your precious baby be born. :angel:
You're in my thoughts.

[Mrs J]

I got told at my appointment the other day i was high risk for downs a 1 in 4 chance with just the scan but thank god with the blood tests it put me back down to low risk which makes the results go from 65 % accurate with just the scan to 95 % with both put together, thats why they do the blood tests with them now. It was the scariest 24 hrs of our lives to think i may have to make that decision i was 13 weeks 6 days so it was early days but our decision would have been to terminate if we had an amio and it came back it did. We chose this decision as we felt it wouldn't have been fair on the baby, or our DD she would have missed out on alot. I am just glad it didn't come to that. Im sorry for what you have been through all though ours turned out good i understand what u must have felt :hugs:

[sanbertina]

Thanks for your response. Miscarriage is hard too. I lost my first bub that way at 10weeks so I can say I know how you must have felt. And to be honest, coming from someone who's been through both, I'm not sure which is easiest - to loose at birth or miscarry. Expectations are still lost. Your heart is still broken. And husbands are'nt to flash at understanding what's the best choice for your state of mind. Support with either decision is going to be difficult for them.

Anyway I'm glad all is so far so good with the next one. I think there's such an abundance of appreciation having a healthy baby straight after loosing one, regardless of how we lost them - miscarriage, abortion, at birth - we are ALL entitled to our grief.

All the best and God Bless Ya,
Sarah
________________
EDD - 2/1/08 (my angel in heaven, Liam's b-day)



I was agonising over the decision after getting our results at 14 weeks. I didn't think that I could through with an abortion, even though I knew that my baby was going to die in the end anyway.

As it happens the decision was taken from my hands (and I thank God that it was). At a check up at 15 weeks there was no heartbeat anymore and so I went in and had a d&c.

The next baby the checks were all fine.

This baby they couldn't get all the nuchal results because the baby wasn't quite big enough. We decided not to bother to go back and get it done again because we wouldn't abort anyway. It was a big thing for me that DH said this to me. The first time he kept saying that it was my choice and he would support, but he wouldn't say what he wanted.

So far all good. The morphology shows that everything is fine.

[Mischief]

Sarah - Firstly, Im so sad for the loss of your beautiful little son.

Secondly, like BJ I never had the tests, mainly because I didnt want to know if something was wrong, because I thought it would impact negatively on my baby.

It scared me to think that I could spend the rest of my pregnancy already knowing that my baby may not live, or would be ill. So we choose not to find out. :hugs:

[RoarsomeMum]

Sarah, Thank you for sharing your story :hugs: :hugs:

We are in a wait to see situation with our lil one, been told high risk of Downs (1 in 2 with Scan, 1 in 59 with scan and bloods combined) We found a lot of preassure to do amnio.. but sice termination was not a choice for us, we are just waiting..

I am so relived that Downs is not a fatal condition. Im not sure how I would have coped in your situation. Strong Strong Woman you are :yes:

[forbetoel]

Just wanting to send my love and thoughts to EcstaticEm, I hope everything turns out fine, but just some reasurrance if your baby does turn out to have downs, two of my friends have downs syndrome children and they are the absolute light of the family. One is from a family of 3 kids, the other one is from a family of almost 4 kids (4th bubba still baking)
Honestly those children have bought more to their families than I could humanly think was possible. Goodluck mate, hope everything is fine :hugs:
And to the OP, my thought are with you too, I am glad that you at least got to meet your beautiful little baby. :hugs: