Scared.

[Seekrit]

The more I think about it the more and more I start to panic. It's going to hurt, isn't it? A lot.
I sound like a 12 year old. :o It just scares the utter **** (can we say ****?) out of me.
Did everyone (or anyone) else feel like this? I'm a complete wuss with pain. I have another 6 months to panic about this. Gah.

I'm not opposed to drug pain relief at all, but I would like to try other methods first.. and I'm not completely sure if I DO want an epi (I'll wait until I'm screaming shall i?) but i was reading a birth story and when the girl got to the hospy she was too far gone to get an Epi :eek: that scares me... what if that happens to me and it's REALLY sore?

Just getting it all out.. breathe Nikki... Breathe...

[Pixie]

Nikki I was like you terrifed!
Then I read, and read x100 million books articles on natural birth and I have to say I am looking forward to it very, very much. yes it will hurt, yes my body won't be the same etc but hopefully baby will come out more relaxed, not doped from an epi or or what not, I will have complete feeling of my body at all times etc and the recovery time for myself and baby will be quicker, barring any major complication heaven forbid!

I have been doing yoga throught my pregnancy and before and the breathing alone relaxes that whole area so if you like doing that go join a class or get a book on it really worth it.

and the way I look at it is..it's only for so long you are in pain and then it ends you get a result a positive one :D not like having a broken leg and wondering when the pain will end! each contraction brings you a step closer, I am going to focus on what I have managed not what is coming!

but we are all different!

[Narelle]

Hi Nikki!

I was scared too! Although I think I was more scared about when to go to hospital how would I know anyway didn't have to worry about that as I had to be induced.

Anyway I wont lie it really hurts however it's true what they say once you have that baby in your arms you forget all about it.

I tried gas it was horrible and did nothing for me then I had pethadine and DH said I was a lot calmer between contractions even nodding off but then I wanted an epidural but they said it was too late! Oh no I thought but then about an hour later Chloe was born and I was glad I didn't have an epi cos I felt great!

[Cheekychops]

ok. truth? yes it will hurt....LOTS!!! But you are woman you can do it!!!! I had epi with first but he was premi and i had to otherwise ceasar - so chose epi, next one natural just tiny bit of gas early on......yup sure did hurt. I heard someone scream down the hall and decided I couldn't do that and i NEEDED an epi, but the chiky who did em was in theatre!!! So I thought, I don't care about that - just send her down pronto!!! She had the nerve to walk in when I was 8cm dilated (to far gone for one then) and ask 'did someone want an epi in here?' Hell yeah!!! But I did it. I focused and I did it!!! Hurt yes, do it again? yes....well if I had a choice - but I don't - I had to have a hysterectomy.....but natural over epi? Definately. Oh when I had my hysterectomy I had an epi for pain relief cause I am allergic to opiates (codeine, pethadeine etc) and they peirced the tube surrounding my spinal cord and I had major complications and was flat on my back for just over 4 weeks before I could slowly start to get up/sit up.....so no way on earth I would risk that again!!!!

[draught]

You will be fine. A lot of us went through what you are going through - and we all survived!
The pain doesn't hit you all at once - contractions build up so you can work through it and then have a break in between, things like moving around and breathing help a lot (think bad period pain that isn't constant but comes and goes). YOu don't need to decide on an epidural now - and if you get to hospital and it is too late, that means you have a VERY short time until your baby arrives so the pain has an end in sight.

does any of that help?
(And lets face it - a lot of us have gone back to do it again so it can't be that bad!! LOL)

[JenNT]

lol i remembering panicking like this the first time....and the second...and the third:eek:
Nothing anyone can tell you or describe to you will come close to what you will feel.Its a pain that can't be put into words but once bub is out its gone....like nothing ever happened! Amazing.

I will tell you how it felt for me first time. Put it this way, I asked the midwife to grab a scalpel and slice my tummy off! She was posterior and it hurt bad, in my tummy and in my back.I felt like throwing up. I had an epi with that birth. Second one I had gas because baby was coming quick, no time for epi. He wasn't posterior and the pain was completely different.It was all in my tummy not my back so i coped ok with gas, still hurt like hell...grab that scalpel nurse :p the Third time was 5 months ago and he was posterior but turned during labour so i got it in the back again, no epi just gas.You're body just knows when to push and you make these weird pushing noises from your mouth lol bizarre but at least you know the end is not far.
I was really freaking out the third time during the whole pregnancy...i well and truly knew what i was in for this time! Memory had not faded lol
Anyway bubs had to come out one day and it'll be the best day of your life...pain and all;)
Cheers J.

[rynosmum]

Yes..breath......breath....

I found that by the time I was almost ready to have bubs, my fear and panic had gone - just more a realisation that bubs had to come out somehow !:D I was a week overdue and did the grocieries, picked up hubby and went to see a movie. I wondered why I had to keep getting up and walking around, figured it was something I ate....ah...no......it was the onset of labour at 8:30 that night.

The next morning at 5am, my waters broke when I raced outside as our cat was in a fight...whoops :o

I went through to full dilation with a bit of gas which I found pretty useless. My DH rubbing my foot when I had a contraction, many heat packs and a good shower worked wonders. I finally had an epi when I found that I needed a venthouse to bring bubs out as his heartrate was starting to dip with the contractions - he was also posterior which had made labouring more uncomfortable. I had the epi for about 1 - 1.5 hours so was able to get up and have a shower afterward. The epi was good for me as my OB 'lost count' with the stitches. I wanted Ry out quickly - it ended up he had the cord wrapped around his neck twice.:eek:

For me, it was a very intense day but not the pain I expected. I honestly said to hubby after I had got back to our room with bubs that I would do it all again in a second.

You'll be fine. Plan what you want but keep your options open. It will be the best day of your life - meeting your sweet little baby !:D

[Seekrit]

nonono! You're all meant to tell me it feels like butterflies or something like that! LOL

Nah, just kidding.. I know it'll hurt... and god it scares me. You girls are great tho'... I can do it! (and if I can't.. then what/!?!? :eek:)

[kimmy]

I was wondering when you were going to make a thread about this hehehe.
I felt the same when i was pregnant with Jakob, all i could think was what if some thing goes wrong or OMG people are going to see my hmm hmm lol.
All i can say to you is everyone is different & I'm sure you already know this.
Some people have hours & hour of labour & some don't, yes it is more then likely going to hurt a bit but you will forget all about that when you have that baby (nugget) in your arms.
try not to stress about it too much & just remember women go through this every day.

[veve]

hey hon :)

(hugs)

I felt like you did... and it does hurt... but somehow it is a DIFFERENT pain??!!!

and honestly... I thought REALLY hard about it the next day and I couldn't remember the pain exactly (I just remembered that it hurt) it is a bizarre experience...

and I was really glad that I hadn't immediatley asked for drugs (although the epi was WONDERFUL after 12 hours ...) - when the contractions get really close together (mine were 2 minutes apart for AGES) - it got really intense... but only because there wasn't much down time inbetween...

and to answer your question :D if you CANT do it... that is what epis.... and c-sections are for :)

you'll be FINE!!!! :)

xxx

[Narelle]

Nah, just kidding.. I know it'll hurt... and god it scares me. You girls are great tho'... I can do it! (and if I can't.. then what/!?!? :eek:)

You can do it and if you can't you can have a caesarean, I've heard you can book in for them in capital cities is that true?

[poshBecks]

I was more scared the 2nd time around... coz I knew what I was in for!!! :o
Didn't have an epi the 2nd time though & I got through it!! Dont worry Nikki, if i can do it... you surely can!!!!! :)

[Seekrit]

You can do it and if you can't you can have a caesarean, I've heard you can book in for them in capital cities is that true?
You can book them, but I won't do the elective caeser route. Cut me open if it's an emergency, but I don't like the recovery time. hehe

I'm going to go to bed now.. and dream of painfree child birth :D I had a dream like that the other night actually.. took 2 hours, was just nice and painless.. and I had a little girl :cool:

[Narelle]

Sweet dreams of painless childbirth!

[whatwasithinking]

Just like al lthe others have said - yeah it hurts like billyo but after it all and you have a little bubs in your arms over time you forget the pain. I never believed anyone when they told me that you can forget pain but you do - it is really weird and indescribable.

[Minke]

My advice - If you think it hurts a lot and you go to hospital and they tell you your 2cms :eek: then start thinking about an epi! Second time round I am more scared of the pain... (Iknow what I am in for, but I know that I have done it as well! ) But too late to back out now - try not to think about it as all you'll do is freak yourself out with worrying - and fighting against labour really doesn't help things move along - just ask me! take it as it comes, not much else you can do! (you're not running the show anymore! lol) :rolleyes:

Sweet dreams for the next 6 months of a baby just popping out! POSITIVE THINKING!!!!!

[Foxymoron]

:D

It hurts, but you get a break between pains. I'm more afraid of breastfeeding probs and not getting any sleep compared to birthing though.

By the time you are full term you'll be soo excited and eager to meet the little being inside you that the fear factor will ease off.
That and the fact that you may get so uncomfortable you start muttering to yourself "I can't wait to get this baby OUT!" :o opps, maybe that's just me!

[reAllytee]

Ok i wont sugar coat it either !
IT HURTS !!!!!!! :eek:
But !
When that baby is put in your arms your thinking of nothing else & you even get fuzzy about how much it really hurt in the end.
I had a rather horrid labour but then a few weeks later i was already talking about the next baby ! My mother nearly fell over as she thought after all i went through i wouldnt have more ! But i dont care anymore i just want more babies ! LOL.
Dont worry i know its easy for me to say but honestly your best bet is going in knowing it hurts then at least your somewhat prepared & then take it as it comes.
All will be fine & afterwards you will be wondering why you worried ! :D

[polony]

I too am in agreeance that it hurt a lot, but even afterwards, I could not remember the pain, just that is was present and that I really didn't like it.

But don't worry. When they say it finishes once the baby is out, believe them! I even got to the point where I had pushed Layla out, and they were giving me a needle of oxytocin to expel the placenta and I had the nerve to say "ow!" from the pain of the needle in my leg! After delivering my baby on my own steam!! What a wuss!

But seriously, I think all mothers feel some nervousness (ok, a lot) and anxiety before the first birth. No matter how much stuff you read/hear etc, nothing can prepare you for it. You just gotta trust in the fact that your body is built for it, and it's the most natural thing in the world (even though you may not think so at the time...) so really, you just gotta listen to your body and then do what the midwife tells you. Scream if you want. Sweat. Poo. Swear. Whatever you want. Afterall, it's you feeling it, not anyone else in the room. Just remember that you will get the most gorgeous little person in the world wanting you and you them once they are out.

I amazed myself with what I achieved in the delivery room. I promise you will too.

goodluck and try not to worry. It's all worth it in the end!

[Kirstlea]

Hi Seekrit

Draught is right the contractions build up, last for a minute or so or three and subside so its not constant.

Every birth is different, my sister had 4 contractions (can you believe that:rolleyes: ) and my neice was born. We all dream of that lol.

When my contractions started I thought holy hell if this is the start of labour I'm in trouble, but it turned out that I must have missed the build up.

I went into labour at 7.45pm and Paige was born at 12.06am, so it went pretty fast for a 1st timer but if I had of understood how to use the contractions to push her out she would have been born about an hour earlier. Doh

Something they don't seem to tell you at antenatal class is how to help yourself with contractions :( unless I forgot. (probably more the case)

I told myself after every contraction this pain will be over soon, billions of other women have done this and survived, I can do this too. :)

I seriously had no real plan, just that I did not want an epidural, I went drug free because it was too late and I couldn't handle anything on my face so Gas was out of the question, but I found if I focused on the job at hand it wasn't so bad.

I am sure those breathing sessions are designed to take your mind of the pain, your too busy focusing on breathing lol.

Seriously, yes it hurts but I think if you are stressed or even slightly worried about anything it probably makes it harder.

Try and think about the awesome job you are doing at the time which is bringing a new human life into the world which is a miracle in itself and no man can do that job which makes you a super human.;)

Not being detrimtental to men, I couldn't have done it without my man he was my rock in the birth suite.

Read lots of books and if you can make it to antenatal class you will find it very informative and probably feel alot more relaxed about the whole process once you are armed with information.

Good luck hope it all goes smoothly

Kirsten

[brooke]

lol seekrit - :D
You will be fine.. I am the biggest scardy cat ever and if I can do it anyone can.

I tried not to think about it too much and just read up on everything so that I could make an informed choice.. I also wrote a birth plan and felt this made me feel more at ease and a little bit in control of something that you dont have much control over.
Yes It does hurt but its a different pain like veve said. you some how deal with it. I just kept thinking every contraction is one step closer to meeting my beautiful baby.. (all 26hours, drug free of it) :rolleyes: ..
I was so scared that I would have a needle.. I handled the pain because of this...
go figure! :o :D

You will be fine.. you will be suprised what you can do!

[Narelle]

Wow Brooke!

That's a great effort! I consider myself to be reasonably tough I play hockey and have been cracked in the head more than once and handled that pretty well but I was a big wuss in labour and mine only went for 7 hours, full on induced labour though I don't know if that's worse, it felt pretty awful to me, but I'd do it all again in a flash!

[ETsMum]

Hey Seekrit,

I'm the biggest chicken! I can only just cope with needles (since pregnancy). I'm the type who passes out getting a blood test. And I work at a school and can't cope with seeing kids with "possible" broken bones or blood - AND I WANNA TELL YOU THAT YOU WILL BE FINE!!

Like you, I had myself all worked up in my head. On the actual day, I kept waiting for it to get bad!! Yes it hurts - but you can cope with it!

Also, cause it is your first time, don't have any expectations on youself - that way you can't be disapointed (eg, pain relief, birth positions). By all means, be well read and have an idea - but be kind to yourself and be flexible.

I just kept telling myself over and over again - Women CHOOSE to do this more than once so it can't be THAT bad! And it wasn't!! :)

[lukaelmo]

nonono! You're all meant to tell me it feels like butterflies or something like that! LOL

Yes that's it - you described it exactly, like thousands of tiny butterflies in your tummy...not lol!

Hmmm I ended up having a c-section (little dude was getting veeery squished in there), but because I was being induced I was labouring in the hospital. I can remember walking around and around the maternity ward and breathing, and holding on to the rail in between contractions, and it hurt, but it was okay...

Then I started having a little vommy, and it was still okay, I had to get down on my hands and knees for a few more contractions, but it was still bearable...

When I went down to the birth suite they popped me up on the table - then it really hurt and I went into la la land. I think the problem was that I was on my back though - I remember begging them to let me get back up, the pain wasn't nearly as bad then.

Anyway, I ended up having an epidural (for the c-section) and I was so focused on the labour pains that I didn't really even register any other things they were doing.

So it was all good :D

And you will be fine.

[alissa-mareesmum]

Hi Nikki,

I think it is only natural to have a fear of the unknown, so in order for you to have the birth experience you want you need to get rid of your fear surrounding labour and birth.

How to do this? Well firstly you need to understand how your body will react during labour to get ready for the birth of your baby. The uterus has one sole purpose to house your baby during pregnancy and then to contract to help your baby move out and down to be born. I suggest buying the pink kit so that you can map your pelvis and get to know your body better. It also goes through birth positions which you can practice so you know which position opens your pelvis the best to give your baby the most room to move through. Those lovely braxon hicks you feel are the uterus tonning up and getting ready for labour.

Have you thought about having a doula present?

Unfortunently we live in a society that loves to scare the **** out of women when it comes to labour and birth. It is this fear that creates the "pain" of labour, when woman fight against their body instead of relaxing and trusting in the process.

I say be aware of all of your choices. I laboured for 67 hours and 42 mins all drug free (there are no time limits). Read positive natural birth stories, don't let family and strangers on the street tell you their horror stories because it won't help you.

Birth is not scary it is a perfectly natural process.

You can do it!!!!!

[Tracie]

Nah, just kidding.. I know it'll hurt... and god it scares me. You girls are great tho'... I can do it! (and if I can't.. then what/!?!? :eek:)[/QUOTE]

Hey Nikki.....I think you said it just there.....explore the very best and worst case scenarios and what you would do if they happened and you might get a little more peace of mind. Eg if you really tried so hard to do it but found that you simply couldn't bear the pain, what would you do? Then the "If I can't then what?" question is less of a mystery.

The pain is strong but you can be stronger, provided you have all the right motivations - ie Why do I want a drug free birth? List the reasons why a drug free natural birth is better for you and baby and you will find that you'll feel much stronger and more committed to getting through the pain of contractions. Then once your motivation is clear and strong, start to read about coping techniques and ways to move through each contraction. Fill up your tool bag so to speak!

A great book to get your hands on is "Birthing from Within" - Capers Online Bookstore has it, or you might be able to get it at the library.

Also, I noticed that you are in Brisbane....When I was pregnant with my first I was like you - terrified of the pain I was facing. But someone gave me a leaflet on pregnancy yoga and I started to go to classes - the exercise was fantastic but also, after each lady had their baby, they would come back to the class (with bubs - awwwww!) and we would sit around in a circle and listen to their birth story. The more stories I heard, the less mysterious and scary the whole birth thing became. Listening to how all these other mums got through their vastly different birth experiences really gave me the confidence to do the same. I believe those classes are still happening and I think this is their website.....

http://www.yogababy.com.au/index.php?id=66

Otherwise, you have a wealth of information here too! All the best!

Cheers
Tracie

[JanetF]

Sounds like you're going to be really motivated to learn lots about how to improve your labour experience :) Yes, for many women labour is painful but with a lot of information and support, you can manage that without freaking out. Our culture is obsessed with labour pain as if it's bad when it actually serves really important physiological purposes both during birth and afterwards. And there are lots of things you can do to lessen it. Most pain experts agree that tension and fear make pain significantly worse and so if you can deal with those, all you need to do is deal with the left overs. A doula would be FANTASTIC and ought to be compulsory in hospital birth! Women who have emotional support use far less pain relief and have, partly as a result of that, much lower caesarean rates. So go the doula!
Here's a list of other ways that women manage their labours. And some inspiring birth stories with pics too! I hope you have a beautiful birth, and some preparation will really help that happen :)


Don't forget that studies into pain relief show clearly that women with lots of emotional support, particularly from other women and known caregivers deal with labour pain very happily. Labour is hard work but it need not be awful. It can be beautiful and fun and inspiring!


Natural pain relief in labour

http://www.babycentre.co.uk/refcap/546717.html



Pain relief and home birth (useful in any situation though)

http://www.homebirth.org.uk/pain.htm



Comfort measures for labour – the most complete list I’ve ever seen, a must read!

http://www.gentlebirth.org/archives/comfort.html



Water birth stories

http://www.homebirth.org.uk/water.htm#birthstories



“The importance of relaxing by Grantley ****-Read MD

http://www.naturalchildbirth.org/ma...id=263&Itemid=3

http://radmid.demon.co.uk
From MIDWIFERY MATTERS, Summer 2000, Issue No. 85
Pain in Labour - Is it Insufferable?
By Margaret Jowitt

"Ecstatic Birth - nature's hormonal blueprint for labour" Dr Sarah Buckley
http://www.womenofspirit.asn.au/docs/ecstaticbirth.doc

"Help - it hurts! ... get me the complementary therapies!" Andrea Robertson
http://www.acegraphics.com.au/articles/andrea21.html

"The Pain of Labour: A Feminist Issue" Andrea Robertson
http://www.acegraphics.com.au/articles/painlabour.html

"No gain without pain" Nicky Leap
http://www.acegraphics.com.au/articles/leap02.html


http://gentlebirth.org/Midwife/birthjoy.html

http://www.childbirthsolutions.com/...ssure/index.php

Some inspiration for you:


http://www.nandu.hu/English/Childbirth/Csenge100/csbirth01.htm

100 photos of a home waterbirth in Hungary. 2nd child. Beautiful site!


http://danielfairbanks.com/jude/jude.htm

British home birth site. Very beautiful.

http://rachyllgyne.tripod.com/thebirthofgreyforestwalt/

Beautiful US site with stories and pics of 2 home births.

[wattle]

Hey Seekrit have you thought about doing hypnobirthing? I found it really helpful with taking away the fear as well as a lot of the pain. It's something you and your partner do together and hopefully it allows your little bub to have a calm entry into the world. What greater gift can you give your baby, and your body?

If you want more info let me know. :)

[bronny-jane]

i was scared to with my first. but to be honest it didnt hurt that bad. i was given a shot of pethadine to go to sleep and 40mins later my little girl was born. i was more scared of her than the pain. she was high she didnt even cry, it was really creepy.

[pthalokitty]

I answered this on another stream today, but I would say this about it. I went in to it the birth centre way, thinking I'd be fine and I was a mess- with no options for relief by that stage other than pethadine or the gas. If you are not opposed to drugs for pain the labour ward would be best as birth centres midwives are often reluctant to give drugs, and when I begged for an epi or a caesar, it simply wasn't an option in the birth centre (she did relent and give me pethadine and gas). Something I considered later was this- when I get a headache, or sinus, I run for the tablets. I should have considered that before picking the birth centre (I'd been to a birth of a friend who used the birth centre and thought I'd be fine). So ask yourself how you cope with pain, and what your first response is- do you want the option of drugs if it gets too much? I was all worried about whether my choice would impact the baby, and tried to do the "right thing" which I regret. You have to get through it- make sure you pick an option that gives you choices for what's right for you first, before anything else!
em xxoo

[Snugglepot]

It hurts, but you get a break between pains. I'm more afraid of breastfeeding probs and not getting any sleep compared to birthing though.


Keara, I totally agree with you!

Seekrit, the birth will just happen, read up and be prepared for anything, really, it does just flow! It is bringing bubs home that is the scary bit, make sure you learn all about the first week, it is much harder than the birth!:eek:

[PinkBinkie]

During labour I was so excited and inbetween the contractions I was in good spirits. I was so in the moment that I forgot to ask for pain relief but happily accepted the gas and then the pethidine. My partner was wonderful! I'd heard so many stories, and I guess it's Hollywood as well, that I'd get really angry at my partner and abusive! But that never happened. He was my comfort blanket. After I pushed Lucy out it was such a wonderful feeling of relief over my entire body. I think the hardest part was not pushing when your body wants to. It's an amazing sensation. Your body just takes over and it knows what to do, so trust it and trust your midwife to. It's the most exciting thing you'll ever do.

[bianca'smum]

I agree "Birthing From Within" is a wonderful book! If you can afford it try and buy it! It shows you all the options available and the possible effects of them, including birthing positions, drugs, and other medical interventions.

It also helps you to understand that YOU CAN DO IT!!!! It explains how wonderful it is to be a woman and gives you things to do during your pregnancy so that you can look forward to your right of passage!

My daughter's birth was a 34 hour marathon. What I learnt was that during contractions if you can focus on "YOU" and your breathing you will be just fine! I was lucky and managed to only have a little bit of gas, more to help me with the rhythm of breathing. But if you need more, have it, we are all individuals.

What is wonderful is if you are lucky enough to have a supportive partner, he/she can concentrate on keeping you hydrated, focused and remind you that you are wonderful.

If we are lucky enough to be blessed with a 2nd child, the only thing I would change is that I had a 2nd person in with my Partner and I so that a) he could have a break b) they could help make any decisions that needed to made. (We had complications with bub.) A Doula or appropriate friend/relative would be perfect for that!

Hugs!

[Seekrit]

You're right.
You're all right.

I just have to do it.
*nod*

[cupcakemafia]

i'm gonna be brave and try not to have any pain relief during the birth.


remind me that i just said that in about 3 months where i post a thread telling everyone just how glad i am that i got an epi/gas/pethadine.

my mum laughs at me when i say i don't want pain relief during the birth. she keeps reminding me that i wont even let someone rip a bandaid off me.

[alicesmum]

hey nayfie
i was a wuss too and still am (which DH thinks is funny since I gave birth using only gas).

i am sure you already konw this but there's a world of difference between gas and pethadine and an epidural. the former allow you to still have control & an active birth whereas the latter resticts you to the bed, catheter, high chance of intervention such as forceps etc.

you will do it!!! your attitude makes a big difference. don't be scared. that was one of the first things i felt like shouting from the rooftops of the RBH after birthing my DD :D "MUMS-TO-BE DON'T BE SCARED! IT'S OKAY....REALLY!!!!!" (though it hurts like nothing else, I still can say that somehow, honestly, it is all ok. I think because of all the wonderful hormones you get during and afterwards!!!! love those natural hormones!!! thank God for them!

:p

[Seekrit]

i'm gonna be brave and try not to have any pain relief during the birth.


remind me that i just said that in about 3 months where i post a thread telling everyone just how glad i am that i got an epi/gas/pethadine.

my mum laughs at me when i say i don't want pain relief during the birth. she keeps reminding me that i wont even let someone rip a bandaid off me.
Yeah, I'm getting laughed at a bit for the "I'll try".. I stub my toe and I'm in a blubbering heap on the floor telling people how I broked it.

[lilly]

I'm with you, I'm 30 weeks along and am terrified of labour. The bigger my baby gets the more I wonder how the hell I'm supposed to get it out of there. I just try not to think about it and plan to go with the flow...or whatever.. the more books I read, the more freaked out I get.

[Miaow]

I ended up with a real fast labour so had no real pain relief apart from gas. Im also the sorta person who HATES pain and has a low threashold but I did cope with it pretty well and once the head is out the pain is gone really - well apart from my tailbone and hips which ached a bit for a couple of days just had panadeine for that...

Im sure you'll be ok :)

[Abi'smum]

Hi nervous Mum to be

I just wanted to pass on two invaluable pieces of info that my doula gave to me when i was in labour.
(Bit of b/g - 8 hr labour, 16 minute second stage, no tearing/epi, no analgesia, all on first bub)

firstly - it is ONE DAY out of your life, remember that the pain is temporary, it will go away.

secondly - when you are in second stage, try and resist the urge to squeal - keep your voice deep ( be loud if it helps you) anduse the energy to push rather than scream

Cheers

PS Abi was born 3.8 kg no problem and the time passed like a flash

[CrazyBeautiful]

I hear you, I was so nervous both times...... But, it's the most wonderful experience you can ever have. And you forget the pain quickly. Good luck and enjoy your experience.

[katella]

so we've established it hurts. We've established it's worth it. We've realised most people do it all again. And that almost all of us felt or feel the way you do too. Do not be ashamed of that for Gods sake. Of course you're scared. Me too, and this is my second. I had no epi for Ella, but I'm praying for one this time. Everyone will give you different advice, none of it helps much probably. But for what its worth, here's mine. Stay calm in labour. As soon as its as much as you can handle, it won't get much worse. Don't expect it to be exactly like in the books, each labour is unique. Tell your husband how scared you are, ask for his support and understanding. Take in your mum or sister or a trusted female friend to support you both. Use the time between contractions to rest your body and your mind, and if it gets to much, ask for an epi, just don't wait too long. As I said, there are people who passionately disagree with that, but its up to you. I will be asking for an epi this time as soon as I get to the hospital and if I don't get it I will kill everybody. (Ha Ha) Good luck. Hey, you feel like a superhero when its over, you expect the press to be there and it to be the leading story on the news that night. It's freaking amazing and so beautiful. I can't wait for you to see your babes face for the very first time. You'll never forget it! For now, Make yourself focus on the positives, and the things you can control.You'll be okay. So will I! xoxo