Has to be cuddled and rocked to sleep ...

[maggiemay]

Hi ladies :wave:,

Our little girl (11 weeks) has been cuddled and rocked to sleep since we got home from the hospital - that was the only way to get her to sleep. The good thing is, we only need to do that during the day. At night, she goes to sleep with little to no trouble after a feed :thumbsup:.

We have, since last weekend, been trying to get her to go to sleep herself. I know that she'll never go to sleep herself just like that, so we've been cuddling and rocking her till she's half asleep, then putting her down. She hasn't been sleeping well and has been quite a grump in the evening (due to lack of sleep during the day). I don't think I can do control comforting/crying. I just can't help myself not to pick her up when she cries :no:. Does anyone have any suggestions/done the transition without control comforting/crying?

I'm not sure what I want to do - I mean, I don't mind her sleeping in the sling against me during the day (the HugABub saved my back!) ... but, I don't want to still be doing it when she's 6 months old, or 13 months old. On the other hand, I would love to be able to plonk her in the cot/bassinet/pram and have her go to sleep all by herself. I've read threads with mums saying that their bubs used to need to be rocked to sleep and one day just decide that they don't want to anymore. How old are they before they did that? But ... what if the day never comes ...?

[TLCC]

Hi Maggiemay,

We also cuddled and rocked our first DD and ended up doing so till almost 8 months which is not really ideal.

We ended up using the pick up put down (PUPD) method advocated by the baby whisperer. I couldn't do the controlled crying technique either. PUPD means you stay in the room as they go to sleep. If they are crying pick them up, talk to them, cuddle etc and put them back into bed when they stop crying and settle down. Keep this up for as long as it takes for them to go to sleep. Its a bit easier when they can't roll over or stand up etc but can take at least an hour on the first go. If your consistant it can work in as little as a week.

You might find your giving mixed messages if you use the sling for day sleeps so you might need to do it for all sleeps just so she understands what is happening.

Have a look at the baby whisperer website or she has a book out which describes the method in much greater detail.

I hope this helps.

[fruitjuice]

It will get better!

I agree that you might be sending mixed messages with different sleeping places. My DD didn't sleep well during the day until I put her in the cot for all sleeps. It sounds like you're doing all the right things otherwise - good job! 11 weeks is still very young, she still needs to get the hang of things!

I think from about 4months DD would go to sleep if you just put her in her cot and read her a book or played guitar for a few minutes. Then she used to just go to sleep as soon as she was in there and actually smile about it! THEN DF started to be the stay at home parent and was lazy. Now DD needs cuddled to sleep again and she's nearly 10months!

I don't mind any more, I changed my attitude towards it. If she needs attention, then I shouldn't deny her that. Besides, it can be such a nice time of day - you won't get to do that for very long!

[maggiemay]

Hi Carol, fruitjuice,

Thank you so much for your suggestions. I never thought that I could be giving mixed signals with the sling. I think I'm doing it all wrong :no:! I thought as long as I keep something consistent (we do a nappy change and a short massage on the change table every time before sleep time), I could try getting her to sleep wherever we plonk her :(. She sleeps in the bassinet at night (sometimes in our bed when I fell asleep breastfeeding her), on the couch, in the pram ... mostly in our arms. But yeah ... we're going to move the big cot into our room and we'll try the PUPD method for all sleeps.

Thanx ladies!

PS: Googled "baby whisperer" and there are a few of them out there! Also read about mums who think the baby whisperer (Tracy Hogg) is a load of ***p. I ended up reading Sheyne Rowley's website. Might see if I can find her book.

[Africamum]

Hi Carol, fruitjuice,

Thank you so much for your suggestions. I never thought that I could be giving mixed signals with the sling. I think I'm doing it all wrong :no:! I thought as long as I keep something consistent (we do a nappy change and a short massage on the change table every time before sleep time),

Maggiemay - you are not doing anything wrong. As long as it works for you then go for it. If you can get her to successful sleep using two techniques then thats ok. Do what is right for you and your baby and try not to get too hung up on what may happen in the future, deal with the future when you get there. A lot happens in three months with infants.

Controlled Crying is not recommended until at least 6 months. Follow your insticts on that one.

The PUPD method sounds really interesting.

We are Co-Sleeper I chose the path of least resistance.

[maggiemay]

Hi Carolyn,

Thank you for your reassurance :hugs:

We'll try the different suggestions and do what we feel is suitable for us (us includes the little one of course).

I don't think I'll ever use control crying on DD. Actually ... if there's anything I've learnt since having a baby, is never to say never :) But I'll leave that as the last resort.

I tried to get her to sleep by herself for her morning nap. She cracked it after 30 mins. Now she's :sleeping:in the sling :)