Do kids need to go to childcare?

[tachi77]

I was just chatting to a friend who I haven't seeing/heard from for a while. She has two kids, 7 year old and a 2 year old.

I was telling her that Layla is a fussy eater, is not walking yet, not talking.. yet. I mentioned that mom has a hard time with her some days as she looks after her while I am at work.

She went on to tell me to put her in childcare at least for half a day once a week. That she would develop better, interact with other kids, see other kids and would be more inclined to copy and do, she said that Layla probably gets bored with mom all day....

Anyone agree with this? I mean, I have thought about it but never really thought it would hinder her growth/development!

Do you think there is a great truth behind it? As a first time mom I am still a bit unsure (still??!!!) about some things and well I felt bad, I mean, my friend meant well and all but I felt like I am not doing what's best for Layla and now feel like I have to book her in. I know eventuallly I will put her in I guess I just didn't think it would be so soon, mom assures me she is happy looking after her...

Any comments/ideas/suggestions?

[our little treasures]

I really do disagree with that way of thought. A playgroup would bring just as much out in your daughter if not more as your there with her:thumbsup:

Thats where I will leave it as I get so angry when SOME say comments like that!!:mad: :banghead:

[spring]

I totally disagree too.
I'd say avoid putting your child in day care for as long as possible.

[nic28]

I disagree aswell, playgroup is just as good!!

Everyone has their own opinions, but I honestly beleive children develop at all different ages whether they are in daycare or not!!

[bipster]

I think childcare is fine if you want to use it but I wouldn't necessarily recommend it for helping children's social, emotional or physical development, until kids are around 3. As treasures said playgroup etc where you or Gran are with her would be much better. If you're really concerned about her development maybe have a chat with your GP or child health nurse.

[Pinkbug]

I put my DD1 in child care twice a week in past to give me a break and do stuff I need doing and also it benefits greatly for DD to interact with other children her age and had no problems with that and now she is in Kinder 3 times a week it was good as she was used to being away from me and doing her own thing away from home

I have no regrets putting her in childcare BUT then again if u don't want to put her in childcare no one is forcing u to do it I did it because I felt it was right for her and me...at the end of the day it is up to u what u want to do...

another suggestion u could go to playgroup and layla can play with other children while u r there that may be better for you???

[Shakey]

I don't think childcare is nessesary especially if your DD is around other kids on a regular basis, like at a play group or something,

you do what is best for you and your DD, I was working at a preschool in NZ and we had a wee boy there, he had been in preschool for at least a couple of days during the week since he was about 4mths old or something like that, at 15mth old he still wasn't walking, and he didn't crawl till he was clost to 12mths or it might have been after

just goes to show that even if you have your child in regular care with other kids around that it doesn't actually make a difference, your child will do things when he/she is ready and not before

[tachi77]

Thank you ladies for your replies so far.

Playgroup will definately be an option. Mom will take her for a couple of hours some mornings. She enquiried at the start of the year but they told her it would be better when Layla started walking.

[bubbasmum]

As an early childhood teacher i would have to agree that your child will definetly benefit from attending daycare or playgroup. It is true that your child will be stimulated in developmental areas when they have the appropriate equipment and modelled behaviour from other children her age. While your mum is probably doing a great job looking after her, your dd will benefit more developmentally from being around children her own age and older.

[cornflakegirl]

I agree with the other posters. Playgroup, mothers groups, gymbaroo etc are all places your little one can interact with other children. In all those cases you are also present to provide her with security and to encourage her to participate.
All children develop in their own time and watching others won't make her body mature faster than it would otherwise.
There are many alternatives to childcare to give your child oportunity to play with other children.

[Areca]

As long as your DD is socialising with other kids her age on a regular basis (whether it be friends of yours kids or a playgroup etc. etc.) then she's fine without day care IMO.
I am surprised by the amount of people these days that truly believe kids need daycare to grow and develop normally.

Oh and just an FYI, my cousin's little boy started daycare one day a week when he turned one for the exact reasons your friend said....he still didn't utter a single word until he was 2 years old.

[pookiesossige]

I really do disagree with that way of thought. A playgroup would bring just as much out in your daughter if not more as your there with her:thumbsup:

Thats where I will leave it as I get so angry when SOME say comments like that!!:mad: :banghead:

I feel exactly the same way.

I remember the feeling of being very little and doing something like go down a slide or painting a picture.. all with mum or dad or nana right there- watching, participating and encouraging.

I am really lucky to have those memories. They are playgroup memories and there was nothing better for my social and emotional development at that time in my life. Which is why I take my kids to playgroup, and when I can't, my MIL takes Ronan. Daycare is similar in SOME ways, but different in most- it will never be as 'fun' and there can never be the same level of one-on-one interaction from a loved one as at playgroup or even at home.

Kinder/pre-school will come around soon enough and is great- before then, I wouldn't stress!

[Wivi]

Firstly I can't believe your friend said that to you. It makes me angry when people use the word "should" when it comes to parenting.

I think the important thing is that yes, kids benefit from spending time with other kids. How that happens can be in many forms. Childcare is just one form - there is playgroup, swimming or music classes, gymbaroo, just being around family or friends. Years ago, very few people sent their kids to childcare until preschool age and those kids still developed at the same rate as what they do now! Because they still had interaction with other children - it doesn't have to be in the form of childcare.

I think it is also important to remember that your Mum and your daughter are developing a very special relationship. I doubt she is bored with your Mum.

Personally, my son started going to a small childcare 3 hours a day, one day a week when he was about 15 months old. He loves going but it is like a playgroup really. He was also walking well before he went. A downside is that he has almost constantly been sick since he started there and I think that is worth mentioning as it drives me crazy! If I didn't run a business from home I probably wouldn't send him for a while until his immunity improved.

[Chelle123]

Hi,
I'm going against the grain here but I'll tell you my positive story about childcare.

I had commplications in my 2nd pg and could hardly walk and in hosp a fair bit so I couldn't take my 18m old son to playgroup or any other activities so I put him in daycare 1 day a week. He was walking but no signs of talking.

About age 2 he started in a speech group as he didn't even say mum or dad yet. I was told he woud not be ready for kinder in 2 years time. We were given homework which his childcare asked if they could see and they would do the activities as a group there. By age 2.5 he had at least 70 words.

He is now nearly 5 and his kinder teacher says she would not even know if we didn't tell her of his speech problems.

I won't give childcare all the credit but they helped heaps and it has not done hime any harm.

[SassyMummy]

It's definately not necessary!

If you want to though, then why not?

My mother was a family day carer and said it was really hard to toilet train me - UNTIL she started looking after a little girl about my age who was already toilet trained. I followed her lead and was trained within a few weeks. So I do think other children can help - but you don't need childcare for your kid to interact with others.

I'm thinking about sending my nearly 2-year-old in once a week to give me a break, and give her a break from me... but that's my choice for her, not because I think it's necessary.

[mum23girls]

She went on to tell me to put her in childcare at least for half a day once a week. That she would develop better, interact with other kids, see other kids and would be more inclined to copy and do, she said that Layla probably gets bored with mom all day....

Anyone agree with this?

I do, as it worked for my DD. But it is not an essential thing to do...

But you will get people that are dead against childcare etc, and maybe it is not for everyone, but it is for me, each to their own. I have experienced the positive outcome.

Zara will go to kindy and eat all her veges, drink all her milk, but at home it is a different story!!:banghead:

[mum2bubba]

I don't think it matters weather or not your child is in daycare, I don't think milestones are reached quicker or not, though when I worked in a daycare center before I had Hayley (I was in the toddler room-18 months to 3 years) alot of the kids could do things that my 2.5 year old can't.

[nemosmum]

Im an ec teacher and I disagree with your friend

I think doing the following though could be a great alternative to childcare/groupcare

Playgroup
Library storytime
swimming classes
Music classes
Gymboree
etc

this way your dd still gets a chance to interact with other children without needing to be left in group care

sorry if ive repeated what others have said havent read posts yet:o

[SimplyMum]

I don't neccessarily disagree but don't nessessarily agree either.

I put DS in daycare 1 day a week from about 9months. He has since goine in 5 days and he absolutely loves it. I have to say he's speaking allot better, he can now hold a pen/pencil EXACTLY how they're supposed to hold it and also lots of little things as well. He can blow his nose, he's very good at packing his toys up as well.
He loves crafts and puzzles and books. I would not have done crafts with him as much as they do there.
He loves interacting with kids as well.
I don't think I would be able to occupy him as much as daycare would have.

I honestly would not have it any other way. Daycare has only been a positive thing in DS and I would reccomend it all the way.

In saying that, it's hard. I miss him but I'm so glad to see him at the end of the day.

But's it a personal choice. It's a hard step and a big one but for us, a very rewarding one. But each to their own. It's not something I would ever push onto anyone.

[SAMum]

for a start I think being a fussy eater, not walking and not talking is all extremely normal for a 14 month old :yes: Do not worry you are not doing anything wrong.

My DH looks after our DS while I am at work and vice versa, he goes to playgroup once a week for 1 hour only as I have to go off to work after that. He had very little interaction with other children for his first year and he walked at 11 months and is starting to say a few words now at 13 months, so he didn't need childcare to learn these things, it was just how he developed naturally. There is a little girl at playgroup who just started walking at 16 months and most of the under 18 month olds don't talk, it's all well within the normal range.

My mum had 6 kids that are now doctors, lawyers, teachers etc and not one of us went to childcare or even playgroup for one day in our lives, we just played with the neighbours, didn't do us one bit of harm!

[ourfirstbubba]

I disagree with your friend...as a primary school teacher I do believe that pre-school is a huge benefit to children, however, who better to look after the most precious thing in your world than your Mum when you are working?

My Mum has looked after my sisters two girls when she returned to work and they are so close with my Mum......

I think we are lucky to have Mums who can do this....

you follow your heart....

[SairBear]

i wont agree that they need to go to childcare,


but i do agree that children do well and learn alot with social interaction from other kiddies

[faery]

i don't think childcare is necessary for a kids development. i reckon they will develop at their own pace, regardless.

interaction with kids is good, but thats why there are playgroups and the like.

personally, my ds is 16 months and i wanted him to go to daycare for a half day a week so i could have a break from him and prepare him for when i go back to work (whenever that is). well I brought him for the first day and was appalled at what i saw. kids being violent - pulling hair, hitting, jumping on each other and carers who i felt had no love for the job. needless to say, he is not going back.

IMO, i feel a loving family member taking the kid to playgroups or whatnot is a much better idea than childcare.