Help with teaching 12month old to sleep

[Noah's Mummy]

Hi,

I have an 11 1/2 month old, and I have just returned to work part time. Currently for DS day sleeps, I pat him to sleep (he whinges but it doesn't take too long). But as he gets older and starts being cared for by other people some of the time, I need to find a way to help him teach himto go to sleep by himself when he is tired. He is currently BF, but I am in the process of weaning him during the day, but will continue his night feeds for a while (he goes to sleep and stays asleep all night, so don't want to mess with that one!). DS had been going to a daycare mum, but refused to sleep for her at all, until of course he would collapse from sheer exhaustion. I have decided to try a different care option, as he was screaming from the time I dropped him off until we picked up (9 hour day so too much for me to cope with). Unfortunately we don't have family close by to help with looking after him.

Is there anyone out there who has had success with teaching a bub of this age to sleep without using controlled crying. I love patting him to sleep but I don't want him to have mixed signals about sleep time and to compound his separation issues because he is made to go to sleep another way when away from me. He doesn't have a dummy (refused to take one), I have tried to introduce a comfort item such as a teddy or blanket when feeding him but he continually throws it away (I give up after about the 5th throw, just so the feed ends peacefully), and has never had music or anything to go to sleep with. Maybe I have left all this too late. DS has a very strong will, and CC will be our last resort as I know he will be one of those bubs who will scream and scream and scream and still not go to sleep (really just to prove a point to me).

Anyone with ideas or suggestions on what has worked or might work, it would be great to hear from you.

Thanks heaps,

Naomi

[Goosie22]

I don't think anyone would have a problem with patting him and if they did that would raise questions to the other things they aren't prepared to do. You could show the person who is going to to the babysitting how you do it and then they could just do it the way you do. Have a few practice goes while you are around so they get the hang of your method.

I always lay down with my son (2years) and read he just cuddles in and goes to sleep. When I go to work my Husband does the same.

[justme]

HI,
We introduced a soft toy, bunny thing - just by throwing it into his cot with him every time he went down for a nap or his night time sleep.
We have a bedtime routine as well ie closing the curtains, saying it's time for a nap/sleep now, giving him his soft toy (he usually puts his thumb in his mouth as soon as we give it to him) and then lay him in the cot and walk out.
Usually he chats away to himself, sucks his thumb and will just plop off to sleep.

To get him to get used to sleeping on his own, we used the pick up/put down technique that's explained in detail in the Baby Whisperer solves all your problems books. It's not controlled cyring, basically every time your baby cries, you wait for him/her to stand up/sit up in the cot, you pick him/her up, explain that it's time for sleep and the SECOND that he/she stops crying, you put bub back in the cot, lying down. You stay in the room, doing this pick up, put down thing until eventually (sometimes initially it will take 30-45mins!!! so be prepared to stick at it!!!! and don't give in). After one or two days of this - quite tiring, but boy is it worth it - bub gets the message that you're going to respond to his/her cries, but you're firm that he/she needs to go to sleep on his own in his cot.

If bub's got the comforter in there with him, hopefully he'll adopt that as our son did.

Good luck.
It's not easy trying to figure out what works for your bub, but this is what worked wonderfully for us.
CHeers