Advice Please

[Kachow]

I am a stepmother to 4 children,and a mother to my own 4 children. I have 2 stepchildren now who HATE me ( for reasons unknown ). They are disrespectful, cheeky, call me a *****( the B word), but as soon as their father is near they act like they love me and I have to smile and play along with the game. Well the other night I finally snapped! :banghead: I was dumped with my husbands 2 children ,who live with their mother, for the school holidays because she needed a " break". At home I also had my 4 kids plus the other 2 older step kids who live with us... so in total this school holiday I have 8 kids!! fun fun ... anyway... The 2 other step kids (5 and 3) wanted to go home to their mothers house so we made arrangments for her to get them ... but suprise suprise, she cant get a them because shes busy so now I just have to put up with the rudeness. I had had enough of the lack of respect they give me, their father and the other children in the family... so i confronted their father about it and opened his eyes to what was happening. That was proberbly the worst thing I could have done because all we are doing now is fighting over 2 kids. He says I am picking on them and I have to make allowances for them because they arnt looked after at home by their mother and they need time to bond with me ... they have had 2 yrs to bond with me. We have them every second weekend. I really dont think its an excuse to treat me the way they do..... I am really at a loss as to what to do. We are suppose to be starting our first IVF cycle in 4 days and I have never been more stressed out.:gloomy:

[~rambox~]

Is there anyway you can tape what the kids are doing and saying for proof?

I dont think that you would make it up as you happily have excepted 2 so what would 2 more hurt :kiss:

could there mum be saying things to them to make them act this way towards you ?

[Kachow]

I have no doubt there mother has something to do with it.... but its something I cant change about that because I cant say anything to her or the older 2 will cope **** from her when they go to visit her... they already do. If they are bought something by me she says to them .. ohhhh arnt we spoilt... u love ur step mum more then u love me !!!!... serious mental issues!!

[Sazeby]

Is there anyway you can tape what the kids are doing and saying for proof?

I dont think that you would make it up as you happily have excepted 2 so what would 2 more hurt :kiss:

could there mum be saying things to them to make them act this way towards you ?



I agree!!

my aunty use to put up with the same crp until one day she told her husband what was happening and one day on his lunch break he snuck into the house and the kids were saying horrible things to my aunty and he jumped out and absolutely blasted them and they have never said anything rude to her since.

[~rambox~]

That is really nasty for her to do that she should be greatful that you love her children i know i would be i have my eldest to a different father and i wish he would find someone that loves him as much as myself and his 2 dads do :yes:

[catalicious]

I hope your husband catches them in the act one day..

wouldnt doubt that their mother has something to do with it all...

Its pretty sad though cause the kids will grow up thinking its ok to treat people like that....

Hopefully they realise soon you are not a threat and you ust want to love them and they will treat you the way you deserve to be treated...

[fifipirko]

I think the kids are confused, lonely and angry. They do not know how to deal with it. Looks like your family is much better, happier than where they live now (with their mother) and they are not happy about it so they try to make you and THEM feel you are not worth it. So if they do not like you and disrespect you they will feel your household is not as good as it seems and they will cope better with where they have to live now. I would not blame the kids .. they need lots of loving .. which they obviously do not get at home. Good luck with it all.