Please help me!

[MonkeyMum05]

Hi,
I'm sorry that my first ever BubHub post is going to be a whinge... but I'm not sure what else to do right now!!

My little boy is 7mths and having some major sleep problems! For the past 2 months or so, I have been nursing him to sleep and co sleeping once i go to bed... I decided recently that it was just becoming too draining, and tried CC to get him to sleep in his cot etc.
It seemed to work after 25 mins at bedtime... but thats the only time!
During the night and for naps during the day, i end up giving in and picking him up and pushing him in his pram...(which only works sometimes!) He now won't even nurse to sleep during the day now!! During the night time, I still end up putting him in bed with us, jsut to get some peace!

I would like to continue CC, as I can see that it may be the only possibility (tried every option imaginable!)... but I always end up giving in to him, which makes it pointless and also confusing for him.
One of the main reasons I give in, is becasue when I go in to settle him, he is always standing up holding onto the edge of the cot, and so i have to lay him down and rub his back etc... when I do this, he grips the cot and i have to reef him off... which makes him cry more. I feel like I am being abusive.
I'm not even sure if he is able to get himself down from standing up. This makes CC very difficult, because I end up feeling so horrible and bad, that I pick him up. How is he meant to get himself to sleep, if he immediately stands up everytime he is put in his cot?
Has anyone else had this problem, and if so... what did you do about it?!

I am open to any opinions and ideas!!

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this!

Selina

[MonkeyMum05]

**Editted to tell you that we have removed your second post so you won't get confused by two threads running***

[Tea Lady]

Selina do you have someone to help you with all this? Since you're in Bris, I think it would be worth getting a referral to Riverton as they could prob. set you on the right track. Also, the phone service for Riverton is great - they'll talk you through it all and you can ring them for support when things are going badly. Hope things improve for you.

TL

[draught]

Hi,
I'm sorry that my first ever BubHub post is going to be a whinge... but I'm not sure what else to do right now!!

My little boy is 7mths and having some major sleep problems! For the past 2 months or so, I have been nursing him to sleep and co sleeping once i go to bed... I decided recently that it was just becoming too draining, and tried CC to get him to sleep in his cot etc.
It seemed to work after 25 mins at bedtime... but thats the only time!
During the night and for naps during the day, i end up giving in and picking him up and pushing him in his pram...(which only works sometimes!) He now won't even nurse to sleep during the day now!! During the night time, I still end up putting him in bed with us, jsut to get some peace!

I would like to continue CC, as I can see that it may be the only possibility (tried every option imaginable!)... but I always end up giving in to him, which makes it pointless and also confusing for him.
One of the main reasons I give in, is becasue when I go in to settle him, he is always standing up holding onto the edge of the cot, and so i have to lay him down and rub his back etc... when I do this, he grips the cot and i have to reef him off... which makes him cry more. I feel like I am being abusive.
I'm not even sure if he is able to get himself down from standing up. This makes CC very difficult, because I end up feeling so horrible and bad, that I pick him up. How is he meant to get himself to sleep, if he immediately stands up everytime he is put in his cot?
Has anyone else had this problem, and if so... what did you do about it?!

I am open to any opinions and ideas!!

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this!

Selina


Hi Selina
I agree with Tea Lady - some outside help from someone like Riverton will really help you a lot. They are happy to give advice over the phone at any time of day or night and can talk you through the options.

When it comes to your baby letting go of the side of the cot - my personal opinion is that you don't need to detach him from the cot and lie him down - especially if this is upsetting him more - touch him and let him know that you are there, then leave again. You will find him asleep in all sorts of funny positions, but I can guarantee that none of them will involve him standing up.

If you are sure that CC is the way to go for you then you need to be consistent. If you are going to "give in" as you say, he will be distressed for no reason, you will be distressed and neither of you will get any sleep. If the sound of him crying is too much for you, then maybe CC is not the answer for you - have you looked at the no-cry sleep thread on the forum? If it is what you want then the key is calm and consistent....easier said than done but it is what works.

Hope you find something that works for you soon

[squirtle81]

Hello,

Have you tried wrapping your baby up in a sheet so he can't stand up? iam currently wrapping my daughter as she pulls herself up, and the only time she does it now is when she unwraps herself.

Good Luck

[MonkeyMum05]

Thanks everyone for your advice!

Tea Lady and Draught - Yes, thankfully I do have a very helpful husband... but when it comes to problem solving, I seem to be the most pro-active!;)
Riverton sounds like a good idea to me! I have called them for advice once before! Thanks for reminding me that there is support out there!

Squirtle - I used to wrap bub all the time, but a few months ago he began fighting it. It was a bit scary, because sometimes I would go in to him and it would be wrapped around his neck!
He does still have his wrap in the cot with him for every sleep though. He likes to chew on it and use it as a sheet.:)



So, this is where we are at now...
I ended up laying bub down each time I went in to comfort him... then pat and sing to him very briefly, before leving the room. He kept getting straight back up, but has very quickly learnt how to get himself down again now!
He is going to sleep almost straight away at Bedtime and Nap times... But the CC doesnt seem to be working for night wakings?!He is usually very hungry during the night, so I am willing to let him keep one feed (around 3am) for now.

I think the problem with the night wakings is that he is in our room and can see us laying in bed, so the CC is not as effective?
Should I be moving him to his own room?

Than you all once again for your help!!
It is really very helpful to be able to hear from mothers who are going through similar problems!

:)