View Full Version : Premmie Chat Thread
Anyone interested in having a chat about what it's like to have a premmie?
I had two one of my sons was born at 34 wks the other was born at 28wks.
Do you think them being in the nursery affected your bonding experience?
Would love to hear your story if it happened to you.:hugs:
tired*mummy
24-06-2007, 21:07
HI Mum2my4
My daughter was born at 23 weeks. I think the whole experience did affect our bonding. Its a pretty long story but i'll try to shorten it.
I found out @ 9 weeks that i was pregnant with twins but i had some fluid above my cervix. I went back when i was 11 weeks for another scan & found out that one of the babies had died. I still had the fluid above my cervix which they thought was some old blood & i would probably just loose it before full term. That day i started bleeding. It last for a few days but it was old blood so didnt really worry me. Then every couple of days i started bleeding bright red blood & i started to get worried. My dr reassured me that everything was ok. At 17 weeks i went to bed & within 15 minutes of laying down i had a huge gush & the bed was full of blood. Scared me half to death so i called the hopsital & the nurse said (not a midwife jsut a nurse in emargency) that i had probably lost the baby & would eventually pass it :eek: Anyway i went to the hosptial cos if i had lost the baby i didnt want to give birth at home. I was kept in for a few hours, they did scans & saw that the baby was ok but i had a huge clot on my cervix & they said that was causing the bleeding. Anyway home i went & kept bleeding every day until i was 21 weeks & had another huge gush. Went back to the hospital & they kept me overnight to watch me. Still had the clot on my cervix which seemed to be bigger. They didnt know where the bleeding was coming from. Got transferred to another hospital cos they were starting to get a bit worried. They too couldnt find anything wrong or were this bleed was. Eventually after a week they did another scan cause i had lost so much blood since i had been there. They found a tear at the back of my placenta but was on the middle so it was very hard to see. They said for me to not bleed to death i would have to be induced & they couldnt risk giving me a c-section cos there was too much blood involved & it was too risky also. So i was induced but before that the dr's told us that our baby would probably die or if we decided to resusitate (sp?) then she would probably be severely retarded or have cerabal palsy, be deaf or/and blind, have major brain damage etc or if she lived it would probably only be for a few hours or days tops. But we decided to resusitate anyway and give her a chance. They also said the way they would induce was not baby friendly at all & she would probably die just from the drugs. The couldnt use the drip that is normally used as that can effect bleeding & they did try it at one stage & my bleeding got worse. Within a few hours or labour starting i started passing the clots. I passed about 5 in the whole labour time. 2 of them were bigger than the baby. The other ones were the size of tennis balls. My labour was 36 hrs. It was horrible & i wasnt allowed an epidural either so had to just cope on panedine forte & morphine. I only had to get to about 8 cm before i started pushing & she was so small i could even feel her coming out. When she came out she looked black cos she had no fat under her skin & you could see thru it. The midwives thought she had died but dr's & paediatricians came in & took her & she had a very faint heartbeat, they said the main problem they would have was to find a tube small enough to fit down into her airways. If the couldnt get one then there wouldnt be much they could do. They found one & we heard her cry. Every one in the room started crying because they couldnt believe that after so many drugs & a really long labour that she had survived. They did not expect her to live more than 24hrs but she did. She had a few problems in NICU but she over came every one of them and is doing extremely well to this day. We took heaps of photos of how small she was. My DH wedding ring went all the way up her leg & up her thigh & was still wider than her leg. Its very hard to believe when we look at her now & back on the photos we have. And her foot prints were only 3cm long. She weighed 513gms or 1lb 2.
I do think that this experience for me did affect our bonding. I didnt hold her until 3 1/2 months after she was born. Wasnt really allowed to hold her hand or open her crib cause she was too fragile. It was very tiring too. She was in NICU for 5 1/2 months & i also had a 1 year old too look after. I wasnt well myself cos i had to get over the traumatic labour, birth & pregnancy & try to recover from the blood loss etc.
We arent as close as my DD1 & i are. I also think it has to do with not being pregnant for very long either. I only felt her move once before she was born & with my other pregnancies i felt alot more by 23 weeks.
I think its something i am going to have to work on. It is very hard somedays but she is a miracle & obviously meant to be here.
Sorry for such a long post. So much for trying to shorten it lol :ecomcity:
DoubleDelight
25-06-2007, 08:49
After having two f/t large babies I was suprised at 37 to be pregnant with my new partner and then totally shocked at 12wks to find out we were expecting twins.
I always suffer from severe all pregnancy m/s and this pregnancy was no different but other than this a very normal pregnancy.
A routine growth scan at 28wks revealed that Twin 2 was suffering from a reverse umbilical flow. The initial advice was to deliver immediately. After a 2nd opinion we opted for close monitoring which was u/s every 3rd day. At 30wks a further deterioration was detected and I was admitted for further monitoring and daily u/s with our goal being 32wks. I received steroid injections and at 31wks 4days it was decided that viability was being threatened and we would deliver by c/s at 31w5d.
Having prems was one of the hardest things I have lived through but I found my bond was more intense with them because I spent so much time just focussed on them.
I used to arrive a the hospital around 7.30 - 8.00am each morning and stay until DP met me there after work and we would stay until 5.30pm. We'd go home for dinner and then return to the hospital and stay until around 9.00pm then go home for the night.
I made sure that I did all of the cares and was there for drs rounds so I could find out what was going on.
We were fortunate that we didn't suffer too many setbacks.
I think because I got to observe them so much I got to know them better than I would have if we had gone straight home.
I do find that every now and then I will get flashbacks of the time we spent in NICU and I'm probably a little more protective of them than I would have normally been.
peta1410
26-06-2007, 13:30
Both my babies have been prems. My first son was born at 33 weeks and is now 2 and 1/2 and my second son was born at 35 weeks and is now 2 months. DS1 was in hospital for 7 weeks and DS2 was in for 2 and a 1/2 weeks. It's funny (not haha) that this thread starts now cause I only recently came to a personal discovery that I had not bonded with DS1 until just recently. My experience with DS2 has been so different than with my first and so much better that it made me realise what I had missed the first time round. I grieved so much for my lost pregnancy experience the first time that I couldn't see through it to the beautiful baby that I had. I could only see my despair for having missed out on that "perfect" pregnancy. I went into early labour both times at 31 weeks and was steroid loaded. But at 33 weeks my waters broke and DS1 came out 6 hours later. With DS2 I managed to hold out until 35 weeks but gave birth to him on Anzac Day after 5 days of contractions and 48 hours of intense labour pains. Both times all they would give me was gas. With DS2 I was so adamant that I was going to have an epidural this time round and was so dissappointed when they told me I couldn't. I think that because I was so shy with my first and wouldn't speak out I let myself get bullied at the nursery into limited contact with him bacause they told me that it would stop him putting on weight. So I would sit there next to his cot just staring at him and only holding him at feed times and then putting him straight back in to his cot again. With DS2 I didn't care what they said, no one was stopping me bonding with my baby again. Also when Ds1 was born I only got to hold him for a few minutes before they whisked him away and there was 7 medical staff in the room with us when he was born. With DS2 there was only 3 med staff and I got to hold him straight away, they put him up on my stamach and I got to cuddle him for about an hour before they took him away. My midwife was great, she made sure I got as much time as possible with him because I had told her about my first experience. I'm abit concerned about having a third baby because I worry that it could be born even earlier and I know I've been lucky that they were born as late as they were. I read other mums stories and am grateful now that both my boys have been born so healthy, albeit early. Sorry to ramble, but a good vent every now and then is good for the soul! :ecomcity:
MummyCharmzy
27-06-2007, 10:29
I found it definitely affected the bonding but as soon as he came home we VERY quickly bonded as we would have had he been a fullterm baby. DS was 9 weeks prem and spent 6 weeks in nicu and scn, he will be FIVE this year (I can hardly believe it!) and is doing brilliantly now.
We still have some issues relating to his prematurity but in the scheme of things they're only minor.. they do make me a bit more protective of him though!
My daughter was only 5 weeks early and spent no extra time in hospital, it didn't affect my bonding with her in any way.
Thanks for sharing your stories:hugs:
I found having a prem to be a very lonely experience I like to chat with others about it.
I had bonding issues with my son born at 28wks, I hardly saw him and I feel really guilty about it. Silly I know but the feelings are there.
Thanks again for sharing:hugs:
missmayandme
28-06-2007, 13:39
Hey
My daughter was born at 34weeks and i found the whole premmie thing hard to handle at first i found that when i brought her home and went shopping with her people were always saying how tiny she was and asking me if i drank or smoked in my pregnancy (which i didn't) almost like they thought i was a bad mother. i found this hard and thought that everyone was looking at me and my "tiny" baby. now that she is 14 weeks (8weeks corrected) i find myself still saying "i know she is small but she was 6 weeks prem". do you think this goes on forever, almost like i am trying to make a excuse for her being small. (which mide you she is 5.8kg little chubber)
would love to chat more and see what you think
Kez and Keeley
Hey
My daughter was born at 34weeks and i found the whole premmie thing hard to handle at first i found that when i brought her home and went shopping with her people were always saying how tiny she was and asking me if i drank or smoked in my pregnancy (which i didn't) almost like they thought i was a bad mother. i found this hard and thought that everyone was looking at me and my "tiny" baby. now that she is 14 weeks (8weeks corrected) i find myself still saying "i know she is small but she was 6 weeks prem". do you think this goes on forever, almost like i am trying to make a excuse for her being small. (which mide you she is 5.8kg little chubber)
would love to chat more and see what you think
Kez and Keeley
I found I always had to add that mine were prem when everyone commented on how small they were. Asking if you smoke/drank is just plain rude.
I still sometimes have to say my 28wkr was prem as he is still a lot smaller than other kids his age.
How is your daughter going otherwise?
good thread, thanks for sharing your stories
kenzee was only sltightly prem at just over 35 weeks, i had been going in and out of labour from 22 weeks so we was lucky to get so far
unfortunatly she wasnt a healthy 35 weeker didnt seem to bad at first but got progresivley worse as the days weeks months went on it seems her insides was not as developed as a 35 weekers should be
she is now 15 months old and is a beautufull litle girl in my opinion the most beautyful of all, she is 100 percent tube fed through her nose at the moment but is having a gastrostomy (tube through abdominal wall) next friday the down side to that is it means another operation for her this wil be her fifth operation her third on her tummy the other two was on her air ways, but the up side is we will finaly get rid of her Nasty NG tube (im sure you guys know what there like)
she has started walking this week which is fantastic, especialy seen as she has hypertonia and isnt verry stong and there was a question as to weather or not she would walk with out assistance she certainly prooved them wrong all she needed was physio and a lot of hard work we knew we would get there, i told kenzee the after what she has come through walking would be easy she is verry pleased with her self
kenzee has now reached 7 kilos which is a another huge mile stone for her as weight gain is pretty hard for her but we are getting there
:yelclap: for kenzee walking im so proud of her
:yelclap: :smiliedance: Kenzee for walking!
My son born at 28wks had tone problems and was more delayed than even his corrected age but after lots of physio he started walking at 23mths. It was so beautiful to see him walking.
I hope Kenzee's operation goes well. :fingerscrossed:
tired*mummy
29-06-2007, 09:58
HI
Its good to hear from other people that have been thru this premmie thing. My daughter is now 3 & 1/2. She is starting to show a few development/behavourial issues at the moment. Her paediatrician is going to assess her next month. She was extremely early though & i thought that eventually down the track that we might have some sort of learning difficulty etc.
I used to get asked why she was so small too. Even now that she is 3 1/2 people still say shes small for her age. When i said that she was born 4 months early people reacted like they didnt believe me.
So it can be very frustrating.
:yelclap: for Kenzee walking too.
My daughter was 16months when she started walking.
I am only a new mummy but so far I feel like I am bonding with bub. But my baby was only in the nursery for 4 weeks. It was hard to bond when she was in there though.
THe thing I dont like about having a prem is the having to explain the whole corrected age thing. I just want to put the whole thing behind us and move on. Sure I know she willl reach her milestones at the corrected age. but somehow i want this to be my business. my baby is perfect.
I too get sick of the whole small thing. I mean, my bub is 1 week corrected and weighs 3.8kg. If she had gone full term she would have been nice n big. She is not small she just came out early.
I also feel isolated in my experience at times. I feel like because she is prem people talk of her like something is wrong with her. Very annoying. She is healthy
Hi there,
I've been reading the posts and I thought I'd share our story.
We have Jake who is 4 and Ben and Matthew who are 6 months (4 months corrected).
At 13 weeks we were diagnosed with Twin to twin transfusion. From then on till 22 weeks I had weekly scans. There was always a growth discrepancy but it seemed to get larger as the weeks progressed. Once I reached 32 weeks I had an elective c-section as a vaginal birth probably would have killed as least 1 of them.
I actually found the whole NICU/SCN quite overwhelming and eventhough Ben and Matthew aren't my first children, I was constantly doubting my ability to mother them.
I too get the they're small and are they up to this or that yet? It's getting tiring having to explain to everyone, they are 6 months but were 8 weeks early etc etc.
The other thing I find the nurseries lack is the personal understanding of what us parents go through and that all we really want to do is hold our babies and love them. They seem to forget sometimes that we come in to see our babies and want to spend time with them, whereas they are just doing their job. I think that most of the nurses involved with Ben and Matthews care were absolutely fabulous, but they do tend to forget sometimes that we sometimes need a bit of TLC.
Also what were your families like re support and help with other siblings? I've found that noone has really even bothered to call or touch base throughout my hospital stay, Ben and Matthews time in the hospital or while being at home. I don't quite understand this but maybe some of you can provide some insight as to why people tend to stay away (except for a handful of friends who have been totally and utterley amazing in their support and friendship)
Giblet, I too feel very isolated. People feel that you have the baby or babies and they are healthy, then you should just move on. What they fail to understand is an experience like what we've all been through is probably one of the most stressful things we will ever encounter.
Mikenzees mum, hope the operation goes well. Jake born FT didn't walk till he was 16 months old. Don't get too stressed by that. The main thing is she's here and happy and well. Hopefully things will start to normalise for you soon and the Kenzee will be packing on the weight soon.
tiredmummy, hope it's just an age thing re the behavioural stuff that's going on.
missmayandme, mummycharmzy, mum2my4,peta and doubledelight, a big hello and I hope to get to know you all more.
Anyhow, thanks for reading, I don't tend to talk about the experience much as most people don't understand, so it actually felt good to write it so that others in the same boat as me can read and offer some valuable advice.
Take care and speak to you all soon.
peta1410
03-07-2007, 12:38
I was really lucky with my family support. I had so much help leading up to and after the birth because I needed my 2 year old son looked after so much. And I was in and out of hospital from 31 weeks. However I didn't feel the support there on the emotional side (except my husband). It was like people would just ask routine questions about the baby but never about me or how I was coping. My first son was 7 weeks early and in hospital for 5 weeks and my second for two and a half so because he was only 5 weeks early it was like everyone thought it was a non-issue. But he was still away from me and it was absolute torture. I just think people really can't sympathise unless they've been through it but it sometimes felt like no one even wanted to empathise. Did anyone else feel that?
tired*mummy
03-07-2007, 22:04
Peta1410 - I feel abit like you. I had so much support before DD2 was born because with the complications i had it was life threatening to me, so alot of family & close friends were very concerned & always on the phone to see how i was & even during the labour i had DH, my mum & DH's mum there & they were all more concerned for me than the baby, maybe because we had all prepared ourselves that she wouldnt be alive. But once she was born i felt that people were more focused on her & forgot about what i had just been thru & what DH & i would have to go thru for the next 5 1/2 months until she would be home. They would just ask questions about her (which i was happy that they were concerned about her) but i felt like they just had no idea. We had to go to the hospital which was half an hour away every day & all our family only visited her a few times over that 5 1/2 month period & even now when she ends up in hospital more than half of the family say how awful it is for her but never help out with sitting with her or visiting her, or giving us a break. Really upsets me. I know we are her parents and its our responsibility but i think you can only do so much & when you have other little kids to look after its hard. Some support from them would be nice occasionally, & the strange thing is, its DH's family that help us with looking after our other 2 & they will visit her in hospital. But its my side that dont. Thought it would be the other way round.
DoubleDelight
04-07-2007, 07:28
The one recurrent theme in most of the posts here is the lack of understanding about prematurity.
All the pregnancy literature and classes are geared toward a 40 wk pregnancy +/- 2 weeks and having your baby, then all going home from hospital. Recent research has revealed that the rates of premature births are on the rise and account for approximately 10% of all live births.
I think as a mum of prems it is my responsibility to educate as many people as I can about prematurity and to make people understand that the journey of the prem doesn't end with the birth or discharge from hospital.
I also think it's important that we are here to listen and support each other. So if you do encounter a prem mum ask not how her baby is but how she is doing and let her know that you are there to listen.
Sorry I'll jump off my soapbox now :p
:wave: i discovered i was pregnant when i was 23 weeks,because of a nieve doctor that refused me ultrasounds.he told me i was six weeks pregnant after a blood test.i got second opinion and he refered me for an ultrasound where i found the shocking news that i was 23 weeks!:eek: it was too late to do the usual tests so we just had to pray.a report was sent to the doctor who again refused to devulge the details.my water broke when i was 26 weeks.no one ever explaining anything to me i thought id had an accident!:confused: six days later i finally went to hospital after id had cramps all day...untill they were 30 seconds apart. i was 8 cms dialated,she was breech and being only 27 weeks,she was in for a fight.i was rushed to a womens hospital a hour n half away with police escort in peak hour traffic.i had an emergency c section that took half an hour to find her.the doctors said it was a miracle she survived that long after my water broke,and we should pray for aanother.ishe was too weak.my uterus had colapsed in around her.
it was then i found i had a bicornuate uterus n should have been monitored closely.she went strait on a ventelator and in intensive care,she was there for 3 weeks.thankfully she was healthy other than her age.
the first time i saw my daughter was 3 days later in a photo my husband took.i didnt see her properly for 3.5 weeks(i had medical issues too).i didnt hold my daughter till she was a ripe 4 weeks old.i often get asked how i didnt know i was pregnant,if u dont gt the sighns how are you meant to know?
i never had a problem bonding.even though i was basicly given a baby without pregnancy.
you know they are a gift without the whole experience.it made me fight with her...no for her.
we are nearing her first birthday now.though she is still small(about the size of 8 month old) she is larger than life.
everyday i am greatfull for the experiences with my daughter....not the experiences i missed.
we love her more for what shes been through.
we named her shantae,it means song dance and celebration.
and thats what we do everyday
DoubleDelight
05-07-2007, 07:01
Paige Welcome to you and Shantae :wave: It sounds like a real rollercoaster for you. I'm so glad that everything has come good for you.
How big was she when she was born?
peta1410
05-07-2007, 12:47
Hi paige1, welcome. What an amazing story. I hope you gave that awful dr what for!!! Your little girl is such an inspiration, you must feel so blessed (as do we all).
thankyou double delight and peta410 for replying.it is greatly appreciated.
shantae was 643 grams.
i did complain about the doctor.he is still under revue and is still practicing.
i made an error in my story,sorry.
my placenta collapsed around her not my uterus.
all in all i think you should all be congratulated on your pure strength and beautifull childeren!
:yelclap: its amaizing that even after all that you have been through you still have compasion and understanding for others.
It's so good to see prem mum's getting together to support each other. I'm glad there are a few of us here to offer understanding.
:hugs: :hugs:
it is truely amazing how many people have come together to share there stories and there fears.
there should be awards for people like you guys.:yelclap:
It's nice to be able to share without having to explain.
Hello to everyone.
I felt like everyone just disappeared off the face of the earth when I had my prems especially my son at 28wks.
No one gave me any cards or presents or said congratulations. It was horrible. I have never felt so alone. Even my DH provided no support or understanding. The person who provided me the most support was my friend but she had been due the same day as me and as she was still pregnant and I wasn't and I couldn't stand her. Sounds horrible I know but I just couldn't handle it, I was still supposed to be pregnant.
My son spent his first xmas in Intensive Care:gloomy:
I now hate xmas because it reminds me of that time.
I could ramble on all day about this stuff.
Thanks again for sharing your stories:hugs:
Feel free to add more about your prem experience. i.e How you felt during it. It helps to get it out. I am finding this thread quite comforting.
DoubleDelight
06-07-2007, 12:58
mum2my4 it's sad that people still couldn't celebrate your babies' arrival.
I was extremely fortunate with the level of support that I received but I really feel cheated of certain experiences.
My baby shower was held when my twins were 2 weeks old and still in hospital so I didn't get to have a big belly at my shower and we couldn't play the usual guessing games associated with an impending arrival because we already knew the sex, weights, date etc.
The two things that really got to me were being in a shared ward where everyone else had their babies with them while I sat alone. I actually addressed this with the NICU social worker and they were looking at a policy change for prem mums. The other thing, the hardest thing, was being discharged from hospital and having to leave my babies behind. I will never forget walking out of that hospital with no pregnant belly and no babies in my arms. I cried all the way home. DP was fantastic but there really wasn't anything he could do for me. I just kept saying how wrong this was.
It's great to be able to get all this out without upsetting people. Everyone tries to be understanding but they just don't get it. Apparently because my babies are OK I should just get over it :(
Yeah I was in a shared ward after one of mine and I was the only one with no baby:crying: It's horrible isn't it?
The emptiness when you leave the hospital for the first time was so overwhelming for me.
Thanks for sharing
:hugs: :hugs: :hugs:
I felt like everyone just disappeared off the face of the earth when I had my prems especially my son at 28wks.
No one gave me any cards or presents or said congratulations. It was horrible. I have never felt so alone. Even my DH provided no support or understanding. The person who provided me the most support was my friend but she had been due the same day as me and as she was still pregnant and I wasn't and I couldn't stand her. Sounds horrible I know but I just couldn't handle it, I was still supposed to be pregnant.
My son spent his first xmas in Intensive Care:gloomy:
I now hate xmas because it reminds me of that time.
I could ramble on all day about this stuff.
Thanks again for sharing your stories:hugs:
Feel free to add more about your prem experience. i.e How you felt during it. It helps to get it out. I am finding this thread quite comforting.
I hear you. Ben and Matthew spent their first xmas in intensive care as well. My FIL also died 2 days before they were born and his funeral was the day they were born. It will certainly make for an interesting week.
I went private but I too found that people didn't visit, or send cards and it feel awkward being in the room with no baby. As for going home without them, I didn't seem to have a problem with that as such. I had Jake to come home to but I felt funny going back in to see them and catching up with all the nursing staff. They were fabulous though.
I have a question. Do any of you still think about it and do you ever not think about it. I can't help thinking how lucky we are, but somedays I'm overcome with emotion and I can't quite understand why.
It haunts me everyday. I can't seem to escape it. I have had counselling since my son's birth but it still hurts. I am still angry, I still feel guilty.
I am thankfull everyday that I have my son but I have still not come to peace with the experience we had surrounding his birth.
:hugs:
peta1410
08-07-2007, 11:06
I had to stay in a shared ward both times without my babies and leave hospital both times without my babies. The hardest thing in the world.:gloomy: I thought that I might be lucky enough to make it to 37 weeks with my second baby but alas no. I so wanted to be able to have the 'normal' pregnancy experience of waddling around at 38 weeks, having my baby (and being allowed to have drugs!), having my baby next to me in my room and being able to leave with him a few days later. I was in a room with 3 other ladies and there was one lady opposite me that was really getting to me. She had a c-section and was unable to get out of bed for a couple of days and she was getting so upset that she couldn't get up and do everything for her baby (that was in the bed next to her) and had to get a nurse to help her with everything. She got so upset that they ended up moving her to a private room. I empathised with her that she felt helpless but I wanted to strangle that woman aswell. She had her baby with her and in a few days time she would be going home with it. This was the second time around for me and I was so frustrated I could have screamed. I hated getting woken up in the middle of the night by other babies. Another thing that annoyed me was when I would say about wanting the 'normal' experience some women would say how I really didn't want to get to full term because it really sucked because you get so big and can't get around properly etc and I would have a bigger baby so labour would be more painful!!! :eek: Excuse me? If it meant having a healthy baby that I could bring home with me I would gladly go to F/T and get the size of a small car and labour is as painful as hell regardless of how far along you are. Your body still contracts the same as a F/T labour. Some of the comments were just so hurtful even when people thought they were being helpful. I could go on all day with my complaints, really I could! :o I agree there should be seperate room/ward for prem mums but unfortunately some hospitals just can't do it. I have to deal with the Gold Coast Hospital (I'm sure you've all heard their latest tales of woe!) and there is no way they could manage that. They kicked me out after two days because of bed shortages even though I had requested a long stay. I felt such little support from this hospital and I REFUSE to go back there again for another baby. I'd go to the Mater in Brisbane before I go back there. I have the opposite with xmas. My first son came home on xmas eve after 5 weeks in SCN. We had been told he wouldn't be home until after so it was a great surprise for us, a great xmas present. We didn't tell any of our family he was coming home, we just turned up on xmas day with our little darling. Well, I think I've rattled on enough for today :ecomcity: . I love being able to get all this pent-up anger off my chest. My newest has just started to act up abit after being such a perfect little angel and I'm starting to struggle a little. It doesn't help that my husband sleeps through all the nightly feeds and never offers to get up to him at all. But he helps out so much in other ways, especially with our 2 year old that I really shouldn't complain.
tired*mummy
08-07-2007, 20:07
Hi
Peta - My DH is the same with nightly feeds. Its not fair, i wish i could have a sleep thru every night like he does.
About xmas, DD2 was born on boxing day 2003 so i was in labour on christmas day but DD1 was born on christmas day 2002, so my daughters b'day & first christmas was spent visiting me in hospital while i was in labour with DD2. Of course DD2 wasnt due til April.
Before i was induced with DD2 i was in a room with 3 other ladies too. 2 of them had their babies & the other one & myself were having complications. But i was eventually moved the day before i was induced & then was in labour for 36hrs. After that i spent a full 24hrs in the delivery room & then i was put back in the private room, so i spose that was a good thing. But i know how it feels to be in a room with women who have had theirs babies & you dont have yours. Before DD1 was born, i had to deliver my son who was stillborn @ 36weeks & i had to stay around the delivery suite & wards with all the new babies, so that was very hard. I was pretty easy for me to leave the hospital when DD2 was born because i had been in there for 2 & 1/2 weeks, i couldnt wait to leave & go home. I also had DD1 aswell who i missed heaps.
DoubleDelight - What you said about leaving hosp. with no pregnant belly & no baby in your arms. I know that is such a horrible feeling. I felt like this when i had my son. Something i wish i never have to do again or had to go thru in the first place. Not nice at all.
peta1410
09-07-2007, 13:11
Before DD1 was born, i had to deliver my son who was stillborn @ 36weeks & i had to stay around the delivery suite & wards with all the new babies, so that was very hard.
Oh tiredmummy I'm so sorry. How awful for you :crying: I hope they at least put you in a private room. Just out of curiosity, did anyone at the hospital organise counselling for you? Did any of you get offered counselling, especially those of you with severe prems ie. 28 weekers?
tired*mummy :hugs: I'm sorry that Harvey was stillborn. That would have been hard being around the new babies.:gloomy: Then having your DD at 23wks what a journey you have been through.
I was nevr offered any counselling (son born at 28wks) when I went to get help I was told there was nothing wrong with me I was just tired.
There needs to be more support out there.
peta1410
09-07-2007, 14:50
I was nevr offered any counselling (son born at 28wks) when I went to get help I was told there was nothing wrong with me I was just tired.
There needs to be more support out there.
My God, how irresposible, haven't they ever heard of PND??!!!!?
as i had so many medical problems i didnt leave hospital for a month afterwards.it made it so much harder to deal with leaving her than i think it would have if i was sent home strait away(this is because i hadnt known i was pregnant for long).i was in a hospital specialising in trouble pregnancys.but for the month i was there i watched all these mums walk out with there healthy babys.i was happy for them but my own selfihness and envy tarnished my senserity.i learnt to despise the "normal""mums that thought they had it so hard.i would do anything for that experiance that they would pass up in a second.the bond those mothers should have!instead they r only greatful to get them out n not be fat anymore.
after i had shantae it was like everyone thought it was a bad thing.that saying congatulaions wasnt apropriate.that was all i wanted to hear!just be treated like a normal mum with a baby,not a child on deathbed.
everyone heard what i said but noone listened.
no one took the time to contemplate what i was feeling n what we weere going through.
its been a year tommorow since my experience and a day doesnt go past where i dont think about it.i havent forgotten how everyone acted.ive grown closer to people that werent there to judge how i was feeling.they are unbiased and listen more.
it makes such an amazing difference having a prem.i wouldnt pass the experiance up for anything.its made my bond stronger with shantae.and im greatfull to have her.
tired*mummy
09-07-2007, 15:06
Hi
I was offered counselling when Harvey was born but not when Ally was born. I didnt have any counselling after either of the experiences. Didnt feel at the time that i needed or wanted it. My DH & family were very supportive & my DH & i talked alot about the experience & we still do, so i think that helps.
I was left in the birthing suites when Harvey was born until the next morning when we went home. It was still quite hard & upsetting though as you could hear all the babies. The midwives let us leave thru a different exit too so i didnt have to walk thru the ward. That was very thoughtful of them but it was a horrible feeling leaving with nothing. Especially cos the baby car seat was already fitted in the car too, that made it hard.
tiredmummy, I'm sorry about Harvey. Someone said that having a premmie is about the most stressful thing a parent has to face. I believe the most stressful thing a parent has to face is the death of a child. I'm glad they offered counselling and I hope you feel that if at anytime you need it that you should still be able to access it.
as i had so many medical problems i didnt leave hospital for a month afterwards.it made it so much harder to deal with leaving her than i think it would have if i was sent home strait away(this is because i hadnt known i was pregnant for long).i was in a hospital specialising in trouble pregnancys.but for the month i was there i watched all these mums walk out with there healthy babys.i was happy for them but my own selfihness and envy tarnished my senserity.i learnt to despise the "normal""mums that thought they had it so hard.i would do anything for that experiance that they would pass up in a second.the bond those mothers should have!instead they r only greatful to get them out n not be fat anymore.
after i had shantae it was like everyone thought it was a bad thing.that saying congatulaions wasnt apropriate.that was all i wanted to hear!just be treated like a normal mum with a baby,not a child on deathbed.
everyone heard what i said but noone listened.
no one took the time to contemplate what i was feeling n what we weere going through.
its been a year tommorow since my experience and a day doesnt go past where i dont think about it.i havent forgotten how everyone acted.ive grown closer to people that werent there to judge how i was feeling.they are unbiased and listen more.
it makes such an amazing difference having a prem.i wouldnt pass the experiance up for anything.its made my bond stronger with shantae.and im greatfull to have her.
I agree, I wouldn't pass the experience up for anything either. I would have loved to have got to say 37 weeks and left the hospital with my babies instead of having to express and do milk runs and have the ups and down of NICU and the SCN to deal with.
Anna1984
14-07-2007, 16:34
hello
my daughter isabella was born @ 33wks. i went to bed the saturday night and had a huge gush of blood so i went to the hospital and was kept for a few days they said my placenta had come away and then i went home the tuesday and went to the doctors the wednesday and my blood pressure was through the roof, turns out i had pre eclampsia and he did and emergency c section half an hour later. so it all was a big surprise.
she was 1570 grams born and now is 4 months old and 5.67kgs.
peta1410
14-07-2007, 16:46
Welcome Anna1984, feel free to discuss anything. We're all eager to compare our premmie experiences. My DS1 is being treated for asthma at the moment. He's had a persistant hacking cough on and off for a year so the dr is trying him on ventalin to see if that helps and if it does then it's usually a diagnosis that he has asthma!! Since we have no family history at all of asthma I'm concerned it may be premmie related. He's been on the ventalin for 2 days and already he's slept both nights only waking once instead of the 4 or 5 times I was getting up to him before he started on the medication. So I'm assuming now he has asthma. :thumbsdown:
peta1410: im sorry that he mighht have athsma.that must almost top the cake for you.at least you know and its treatable.good luck with the diagnosis!:fingerscrossed:
Anna1984 welcome!:wave:
shantaes 1st birthday was on saturday!
i remember thinking about what it would be like when i was in hospital.im so glad to reach this milestone.:yelclap:
its funny,no one wanted to celebrate her birth but everyone wants to celebrate her birthday.
i have some more news.i am pregnant!the doc confirmed this morning.im going for an ultrasound this arvo.
i hope so much that it is not in one of my "horns" or i will almost certainly mc.
i feel sick to the stomach with worry.if it is in one of my "horns" i feel like im only going to wait for the mc to happen.:crying:
gotta hold myself together for shantae.
its going to be the same as last time,no one will want to know the bad news.but if its good news everyone will want to celebrate with me.
gotta stay positive and gotta go....
paige, a conservative congratulations. Good luck with the scan this afternoon. I have my :fingerscrossed: for you that it's not one of your "horns". A big happybirthday to Shantae.
as soon as they started the scan i knew something was up.the woman doing my ultrasound let out a gasp and called for the docs.at this stage they hadnt switched my screen on so i couldnt see what was happening.
the doc then looked at me, smiled,and said congatulations.......your having triplets.:eek: :eek: :eek: !!!!
i dont know what your supposed to do in that situation but i only wanted to know my chances of keeping them.
the doc said they are 7wks3days,two are identical,one is not.
all are planted in my "horns".but the doc doesnt think it should matter,i know otherwise.
we can only hope and pray.
i havent been in this trhead for awhile just wanted topop in and see how everyone is doing, im sorry ti here your litle one may have asthma poor thing what these premies have to deal with, hopefuly it wil be at a managable state soon poor baby \
And paige congrats on the triplepts i hope all goes well
Paige, OMG congrats. How are you feeling about being a mum to triplets? What are your horns?
DoubleDelight
18-07-2007, 08:04
:wave: Everyone hope you are all well.
Anna1984 Welcome. Good to see another new face.
Peta1410 Sorry to hear that your little man isn't feeling well.
happybirthday Happy 1st Birthday Shantae
Paige :wizard: Triplets how fantastic. Fingers crossed for a safe pregnancy. Make sure you join us in the multiples thread.
shajake: the idea of triplets still hasnt hit me.it will be an instant family.i looking forward to getting big(even if they are prem).im just scared this isnt going to be an easy pregnancy.i dont want to get my hopes up till im over the 3 month mark.
i forgot to explain that i have a bicornuate uterus (my uterus is in the shape of a loveheart).horns is the term used for the top of both sides of the loveheart.that is why i cant go full term and misscarry so much.
there isnt enough room in there for one baby...how can i carry three???????????
thankyou for telling me about the multiple chat thred.i will have a look.
till next time...be safe
Hi Everyone,
I haven't been around much.
Paige1 - Congratulations on your triplets :babydust2: :babydust2: :babydust2: here is some baby dust for them.
I hope it all goes well for you.
:hugs:
peta1410
20-07-2007, 12:10
CONGRATULATIONS paige1, what exciting news about your triplets. I bet you were shocked, it was probably the last thing you expected to hear!!!!! Keep us updated on your progress.
Talon seems to be handling the ventolin fine and it certainly helps with his cough so the assumption has been made that it's asthma. Oh well, at least it's managable and only seems very mild. He just basically needs the puffer when he's coughing alot. My darling little 12 week old, Rafferty has the flu! He's sooooo snuffly and coughs so much after every feed that he vomits, :barf: which means he's not putting on much weight. But he saw the dr today and there wasn't much to do except pump his little nose full of saline and let that try to clear it up. If he isn't better by Monday dr said to bring him back. And he said it's fairly common for the weight gain to platau when they are sick and pick up again when they're better, but he's so little still that I hate knowing he's not putting weight on. :thumbsdown:
Paige, I think any multiple birth is scary and they will most probably come early. Triplets usually get to around 33/34 weeks. So if you can there you'll be doing great. Ben and Matthew are id twins and they came at 32 weeks due to a complication. I'm happy to discuss this in more detail if you like, just ask.
Peta, glad that Talon seems better on the ventolin. Pure Rafferty. It's hard when the kids are sick especially when they are so little. I too worry when mine don't eat well because they are sick. I just pray that mother nature will look after them. How much does Rafferty weigh now?
I'm off to Brisbane for the weekend. Have a great weekend ladies.
peta1410
23-07-2007, 15:03
[quote=Shajake;1717255] How much does Rafferty weigh now?quote]
Hi Shajake, Rafe weighed 4.3kg last week at 12 weeks. We'll see this Wednesday what he now weighs. He's gone from sucking dry 150ml bottles every 4 hours to between 50-100mls every 4-5 hours. Poor little man just has no appetite.
Peta, poor little man. How is he doing today?
peta1410
24-07-2007, 12:55
Peta, poor little man. How is he doing today?
Hi Shajake, Rafe's still not drinking well. I'll have a chat to the CHN on Wednesday when he gets weighed. I'm starting to get abit worried. On the plus side though, he seems so much happier today. He's smiled alot more and let out a few little gurgle-screams :p but he still seems to be more sleepy than he was before he got sick. I hope he's better soon. I have to have knee surgery next week :( so I won't be able to do much with him. Mum's taking care of me for a week so DH doesn't need to take work off but it means Talon goes to MIL and Rafe comes with me to mums. So I'm hoping he's much more improved by then so mum doesn't have to stress about two of us!!!
Hi Peta, Have you spoken to your paediatrician? I would call if you one and chat to them and let them guide you. Mine's very good and will answer questions over the phone and advise the best to do. He helped us when we had to take Matthew into the children's hospital last Monday night.
peta1410
28-07-2007, 13:22
Poor wee man Rafferty had lost 20 grams when we had him weighed on Wednesday so we took him to our doctor that afternoon. When they weighed him on their scales he was heavier (mind you he still had all his clothes and his nappy on) but the doctor said that because he had been off his food some weight loss was expected and he reckoned 20 grams was nothing to get too concerned about if he puts weight on next week. However if he continues to feed poorly and loses weight more action will need to be taken. Having said that, doctor discovered when he was checking Rafe over that he has an ear infection (probably a side effect from his cold) and this could be the reason he's off his food. So he's been put on anti-b's and today he's started demanding more food. So hopefully :fingerscrossed: he's getting back on track. YAY!!!
I hope that Raf has a quick recovery. yay for doctors.
Hi Everyone,
I am so glad I found this thread. I am sort of desperate for some advice. I had my second son almost 2 weeks ago at 33 weeks. I have been expressing milk with the worst pain ever in which we have tried different pumps and methods and lactation consultant said pain may not get better even when fully breat feeding. I am almost crying as i express. My baby is being tube fed my milk and we have been attempting to Breastfeed twice day. I also have crohns disease and the more stressed I am getting the sicker I am getting. After much guilt and talking things through with my husband I am considering going to formula. If anyone would mine giving me advice on if they Breast or Bottle fed i would appreciate it. Words cannot express how bad I am feeling at the moment. I have spoken to our padeitrician and he advised me breast is best but not the only way. Also I am feeling guilty when ever I am not at the hospital nursery as well? I sort of guess this is a normal reaction as well. I just didnt expect this part to be just so hard emotionally.
Thanks for any advice to be given my way.:confused:
DoubleDelight
06-08-2007, 08:25
Elfing
Welcome to our thread and congratulations on the arrival of your beautiful baby. I too had issue with lactation, and have done with all of my children. When I expressed I barely filled a specimen bottle and having twins made it worse. I continued to express a little but had to comp feed formula. By the time the twins were 8wks old they were both fully formula fed. Did I feel guilty? Yes, Did I logically know that the decision I made was the best for my babies? Yes. There is no right or wrong only what is right for you and your baby.
Although I don't have Crohns I do have medically diagnosed IBS so I understand the linke between your disease and stress. It is easier said than done to say not stress but try and remove all the unnecessary from your life right now, focus on getting well and getting baby home, the rest will take care of itself.
Do you ring when you're not at the hospital? Maybe that could help a little.
If you need someone to talk to my msn/email is double_delight@bigpond.com so feel free to add me.
:hugs: :hugs:
Double Delight
Hi! Thankyou so much for the reply. I have made the decision to discontinue expressing and going to formula. I am actually starting to feel that I have made the right decision. At least I know that I will be well enough now to look after my son when we get him home. I gave him his first bottle feed today and he guzzled down the first half of his bottle. All 30mls:smiliedance: and then we tube fed the rest. I have been visiting him between 2-3 times a day and I usually ring the nursery once a day as well. I still feel bad when I leave but having a fourteen month old as well I just dont seem to have enough time. Anyway thanks again. I hope to be on here more and get chatting with you all more:)
Elfing, congratulations on the birth of your son. Matthew and Ben were born at 32 weeks and I like you expressed etc, I also had a 4 year old that needed my attention. I expressed for 5 weeks and thought to myself that they will have 5 weeks of my milk and then the rest will be formula. I've never looked back.
How are you doing? It can get very time consuming going to to visit a baby daily and very exhausting. Make sure that you look after yourself and use the time that he's in Special care to recover from the birth.
How is your son doing today? May his time in hospital be speedy and problem free.
peta1410
07-08-2007, 13:37
hi elfling, welcome to the thread, hope all is well for you. In reply to your question; my first son was 33 weeks and my second was 35 weeks and I had problems expressing with both. I have excema and very sensitive skin so I had a severe allergic reaction to the plastic in the breast pump, however all the nurses and the lactation consultant all encouraged me to continue because "breast is best". I was in so much agony that when I finally made the decision to switch to formula I was so relieved that I knew I had made the right choice. As it turned out, Talon was in SCN for 5 weeks so there was no way I would have coped for that long. When I was pregnant with Rafe I asked the lactation nurse prior to his birth if I could count on her support if he was early and I couldn't pump and she said all the nurses would respect my decision. Lo and behold, another early bub in need of tube feeding. I told the nurses about my last experience and that although I agree that bf is better for bub I couldn't go through that again and I wanted to formula feed. I got no encouragement and they made me feel so guilty that I tried expressing again...and it happened all over again. So I told them to back off and that I was switching to formula whether they approved or not. Instantly I was relieved again. Ultimately if you are stressed you become unwell and that's bad for everyone, including bub. I think you've made the right decision. My babies are as healthy as any breastfed baby. Guilt is a normal feeling when it comes to premmie babies so don't feel bad if you feel that way. We all know what you are going through so vent any time you need to. Sometimes it's much easier talking to women who've been through it and understand completely, others, although compassionate really have no idea what it's like.
Hi Girls,
Thanks for the post Shajake and Peta1410. It is so nice to find out that expressing has also been difficult for others. At least the midwives in the special care nursery have been pretty supporting with me going to formula which I was a little bit worried about. I was so worried at first that it was my husband that told them our baby is now to go on to bottle feeds when he went up for a visit. He was much of the opinion that he is our baby and what we say is final!!!!!
Well I went in early this morning and he hasn't gained any weight today which was a little disappointing. he is feeding well so I expect this to change. He has now been in the nursery for 14 days and has gained a total of 180grams.
Yesterday he had his first ear screeing test. The right ear came up fine but the couldnt get a reading in the left ear. They tried again later and still nothing. They told me this can be common in prems and they will try again in a few weeks and not to worry as it may still just be too early. Has this happened to any of you?? Anyway I am heading back now to hold my gorgeous boy. Thanks again. Its so nice to chat with people that have been there:yelclap:
Elfling
Gabrielle
10-08-2007, 15:49
hi fellow parents need to vent about my dd. she is not sucking, she is now 4 mths corrected, she was born 3 mths early.
she was doing ok at times, than my dh had a minor accident, a week later i broke my leg, 5 days later my mother crashed her car.
i am feeling like a bit of a basket case not walking. things just feel like "what else could go wrong".
feeling frustrasted and a bit like a fool.
sorry about the rantting.
peta1410
10-08-2007, 20:19
hi Gabrielle, how are things for you? Sounds like you've had a tough time of late you poor thing. I know what you mean by the not walking and feeling like a basket case. I had knee surgery last week and hadto ship my boys off to 2 sets of nannas. I went and stayed with my mum who had my 4 month old because I couldn't bear to be away from him for a week. It's so frustrating not being able to do the simplesyt of things like walking around with your baby, or getting up to make a bottle etc. I was really lucky that I had my dear mummy to look after us both. I'm up and around now and only in a little bit of pain but you must be at your wits end with a broken leg. Is there anyone helping you out? Are you partner and mum out of action too? How long are you in the cast for? My baby was off his food a few weeks back and refused to suck and he lost weight, it turned out to be an ear infection. Anti-b's cleared it up and he put on 400gr in 2 weeks, the little piglet!! Have you taken your little girl to your gp? It could be something simple like that. I'm not one to take my boys to the dr for every little bump or cold but when he lost weight and wouldn't feed I admit I did get worried. Hopefully your little one picks up her act and stops worrying her mother!!! :shame: Hope you are feeling better soon.
angel_one
12-08-2007, 11:43
OMG this is so great!!! big thanks to the lovely lady who started this thread! (sorry cant remeber that far back for names!)
so ok a bit about us - i have 3 wonderful grubs, 2 term babies and my little man (32weeker). my first baby "girl" was brillant, 2 days late lol, great LONG labour with no drugs, and we were home in 24 hours!!. 2nd baby ds1, well this is when the issues started, horrible pg, ended at 38ish weeks, with PROM (Premature rupture of membranes) - thankfully, labour started not long after, he was born again long labour, drug free (apart from the 2 panadols to lower my fever! lol) and then whisked off the the nicu cause he was showing signs of an infection (too long inside after rupture) so 48 hours later we got to go home (and i thought this was bad!) 4mths later......... oh **** i dont feel too well! about 10 pg tests later confirm yep theres another one on the way!!. this was yet again another horrible pg - which i put down to the close pgs, the boys due dates were a day apart!! (xmas day and boxing day! lol) we got to 29 weeks and i got sick, i spent a day on the couch curled up in a little ball in pain (what seemed like contractions) and a fever - the week my best friend had come to visit!, well that afternoon when dh got home, they concluded it was time to head to the hospital - so off we went, we life in a country town so we did the drive to the closest (40km away), they then that night flew me to town, who concluded - you have a kidney infection!! kept me in for a week, and sent me home with follow up appointments with high risk ob, (they were concerened about my liver) u/s and blood tests! (oh i also found out - from reading my charts! that i had GBS!) - 2 weeks later ....... pPROM!! AGAIN - this time its preterm PROM - @ 32 weeks! so again we drive then fly to hospital! and after a day of bed rest - trying to keep him on for longer and get the steriods in, we discover mechonium (sp?) and they then induce, for 2 days, before my orignal ob comes back and rips the doc that had been looking after me head off, cause i was well still siting there and should have had a c-sect by then! so in to theatre we went and eventually they find him (what a wonderful feeling that was!) when he was born he wasnt breathing so he was pretty muchly whisked off to the dreaded nicu with out me even getting a glimse of him! (dh went with him though!)
we were told before he was born that he would most likely be in there for 4-5 weeks, untill he was gaining weight, suck feeding ect (all that stuff you girls know already) well he spent 5 hours on cpap, then went straight to normal air in the incubator, had about 3 days (in total) under the uv lights because he was jaundiced, on day 3 he had his first breast feed! (mumma got a big smile thinking back to that day!) day 9 mum went home, day 10 mum came back - hes ready for rooming in!! day 11 - sorry back to the nicu billirubin levels tooo high again, day 12 -we got to go home - with that stupid billiblanket!! (only for one nite).
hes now 9mths old and we have a few health issues (that will hopefully be sorted this week - waitng for pead appointment) hes not gaining weight, and is having tremors, not enought urine output.
other than that, he is a little smartie, and is doing more than ahead with his milestones - my first two were a head, and well hes with them (they walked at 10mths - hes now 9 and is crusing, and we predict he will be walking my 10)
Hey
almost like i am trying to make a excuse for her being small. (which mide you she is 5.8kg little chubber)
hah you think shes little!! - my boy is 9mths (7ish adjusted) and hes that weight!!! lol
oh and god i hate the adjustment explanination thing!!
as for bonding, i think he has more than made up for that, he likes his snuggles! (and the wrap carrier thing!)
the issues i had were with my 10.5 mth old ds1!! who took 6mths to "love" me again! (poor kid!) he just didnt want to have anything to do with me, but now thankfully he loves me again! lol, and his little brother!
double delight, my boy came before my baby shower too (it was a joint baby shower - playgroup mums!) but he was present at his shower! . and as for the share wards, we only have 2 bed rooms, but the day after hayden was born, a lady was wheeled in after her c-sect, WITH HER BABY!!! i spent 2 nights listening to this woman and her baby, crying most of the time! - i think the nurses pick up on it cause after that i only had prenatal roomies! lol (or none at all)
I have a question. Do any of you still think about it and do you ever not think about it. I can't help thinking how lucky we are, but somedays I'm overcome with emotion and I can't quite understand why.
i have found that i cry at everything, - im trying to do his scrapbook! - i open the note book i used as a journal when we were in hospital and end up in tears!! - hell im :crying: now!! looking at photos of him hooked up to everyhthing is tough, thus the scrapbook is taking some time! i even find my self crying while hes feeding - so sad i am! lol
as soon as they started the scan i knew something was up.the woman doing my ultrasound let out a gasp and called for the docs.at this stage they hadnt switched my screen on so i couldnt see what was happening.
the doc then looked at me, smiled,and said congatulations.......your having triplets.:eek: :eek: :eek: !!!!
i dont know what your supposed to do in that situation but i only wanted to know my chances of keeping them.
the doc said they are 7wks3days,two are identical,one is not.
all are planted in my "horns".but the doc doesnt think it should matter,i know otherwise.
we can only hope and pray.
OMG congratulations!!!!!!
we have plans for a 4th baby (a little girl thanks! lol) but at the same time as wanting another one, i feel that im a real cow casue the chances of having another PROM baby are high - odds arnt looking good! - and to put that poor baby thru the nicu stay, just makes me feel selfish - you know what i mean?
well i must go and see what the boy is up too! - i think hes been feeding on his brother and sisters table scraps agian! (i really wish they wouldnt leave their food on the floor! - really wish little miss 4 didnt help her self to the pantry and fridge!! lol)
angel_one
12-08-2007, 11:45
wow that was long!
DoubleDelight
13-08-2007, 08:42
Hi Angel_One and welcome to our family. Nice to see another Bailey too :D that is our sons' name.
I understand what you mean about feeling selfish for wanting another child. If it is any consolation I do know of one couple in particular that had a f/t, then a 30wkr, then a 28wkr who is now a :angel: and have successfully carried another pregnancy to term subsequent to this.
It's great to hear that your little man is doing so well.
:wave: to everyone else.
Welcome angelone, Thanks for sharing your story. I look forward to getting to know you and your family a little better.
angel_one
16-08-2007, 20:50
hello girls!!
well we had the appointment with the paed today!
- her first thoughts are - hes not getting enough to eat - so we have a schedual of what and when to feed him for 2 weeks weighing him twice a week. (she tried to take the boobie from him!! - however we decided that as long as i give him a formula top up after a breast feed she will be happy)
- 2nd thoughts - it could be a number of things, malabsorbtion, metabloic disorders, ect... so he had blood drawn today (poor baby!) and i have to get a stool sample and urine sample sent to then asap.
and we return in 4 weeks!
i still have bets going that its not an intake of food problem!9or supply issue) - cause he eats! she said hes not supose to be feeding every 2-3 hours at his age! (should be 4-5 hourly) im like hey i just feed him, hes not gaining anough weight so i feed him (and he is demand feed too so...) but time will see!!
peta1410
19-08-2007, 14:14
i still have bets going that its not an intake of food problem!9or supply issue) - cause he eats! she said hes not supose to be feeding every 2-3 hours at his age! (should be 4-5 hourly) im like hey i just feed him, hes not gaining anough weight so i feed him (and he is demand feed too so...) but time will see!!
Good luck with it all angel_one, hope you find out soon.
It's so hard sometimes isn't it. You do everything the experts tell you to do and you're still made to feel like you're doing it wrong. I personally think we have too much input from health professionals in the raising of our babies and kids. I like to think I know what's best for my kids and I would never do anything to endanger them but sometimes I feel like everything is being made more complicated than it needs to be. That's my rant for the day done. I'm off to USA (Las Vegas and LA) for 9 days next week!! YAY!!!! I'm so excited. Sorry, I know that's not baby related but really I just wanted to brag!! :smiliedance: Worse thing is that my boys are staying here and I'm going to miss them soooooo much. :crying: My baby Rafe has just left to stay with my mum and we're about to leave to take Talon to DH's mum. I already feel like crying. He's almost 3 so I think it will be harder saying goodbye to him cause he knows we're going and I know he's going to cry when we leave. :crying: :crying: But it's only 9 days and then we'll be back to give them both big cuddles. Talk to you all soon.
angel_one
19-08-2007, 15:57
Good luck with it all angel_one, hope you find out soon.
It's so hard sometimes isn't it. You do everything the experts tell you to do and you're still made to feel like you're doing it wrong. I personally think we have too much input from health professionals in the raising of our babies and kids. I like to think I know what's best for my kids and I would never do anything to endanger them but sometimes I feel like everything is being made more complicated than it needs to be. That's my rant for the day done. I'm off to USA (Las Vegas and LA) for 9 days next week!! YAY!!!! I'm so excited. Sorry, I know that's not baby related but really I just wanted to brag!! :smiliedance: Worse thing is that my boys are staying here and I'm going to miss them soooooo much. :crying: My baby Rafe has just left to stay with my mum and we're about to leave to take Talon to DH's mum. I already feel like crying. He's almost 3 so I think it will be harder saying goodbye to him cause he knows we're going and I know he's going to cry when we leave. :crying: :crying: But it's only 9 days and then we'll be back to give them both big cuddles. Talk to you all soon.
wow how lucky are you!!!!!
what you going to the usa for?
and thanks heaps!!
Hey Everyone :wave:
Thanks heaps for sharing your stories. I find great comfort in knowing others experienced similar feelings etc.
If I can give anyone hope that is considering another one but worried it may be early I had a baby at f/t then one at 34wks and then one at 28wks and then much to everyone's surprise had a F/T baby.
You can beat the odds. They told me I would be lucky to get to 28 wks that if all went well I would only get to 30wks. I got to 38wks :smiliedance:
:hugs:
peta1410
30-08-2007, 13:20
Hi everyone, safely back from USA. I had a ball but I missed my boys sooooooooo much. We got back yesterday morning and I think I'll be catching up on sleep for the next week. Not easy to do with a 4 month old. We were in Vegas for 5 days where my husband had a conference at the Mandalay Bay Casino for 3 days. We stayed in the Luxor Casino which is shaped like a giant pyramid inside and out and is all Egyptian themed inside. The hottest day was 42 degrees with hot desert winds!! SO HOT!!! We flew over the Grand Canyon in a helicopter and landed in the base for a picnic lunch. Amazing. After that we went to LA for 3 days. The weather there was so much nicer. Saw the hollywood walk of fame and the hand and foot prints outside the Chinese theatre. Next day we went to Universal studios. Heaps of fun. Was really good, but very glad to be home. Flight home was 14 hours!
Rafe's sleeping through the night now! YAY!!! He still stirs and wakes up but he doesn't scream for a bottle. So he has a bottle about 7pm and doesn't have another one till 6.30 the next morning. Even that makes such a difference to my sleeping patterns. I hope it lasts. I remember that Talon started sleeping through at about 6 months and then when he was about 9 months he started waking up again through the night crying. He was such a hard baby. Rafe has been so much easier so far. It probably has a lot to do with the fact that he's my second but I think it's mainly because Talon was a tough baby. And he's still a handful now at almost 3. I think that Rafferty is just easier over-all, just a much calmer baby in general. Did anyone else get that with their babies? One a nightmare baby and one a dream baby?
If I can give anyone hope that is considering another one but worried it may be early I had a baby at f/t then one at 34wks and then one at 28wks and then much to everyone's surprise had a F/T baby.
You can beat the odds. They told me I would be lucky to get to 28 wks that if all went well I would only get to 30wks. I got to 38wks :smiliedance:
:hugs:
That's always comforting to hear. We're still debating whether or not we want to risk having a third just incase we have a 3rd premmie. We are worried it could be even earlier than our 32+6 weeker. That was hard enough. and I'm also worried that I could have another screamer like Talon was. We've got it so good at the moment with our Rafe-man. Obviously he has bad moments during the day but Talon almost drove me insane!!! :banghead:
Gabrielle
03-09-2007, 13:30
Rafe's sleeping through the night now! YAY!!! He still stirs and wakes up but he doesn't scream for a bottle. So he has a bottle about 7pm and doesn't have another one till 6.30 the next morning. Even that makes such a difference to my sleeping patterns. I hope it lasts. I remember that Talon started sleeping through at about 6 months and then when he was about 9 months he started waking up again through the night crying. He was such a hard baby. Rafe has been so much easier so far. It probably has a lot to do with the fact that he's my second but I think it's mainly because Talon was a tough baby. And he's still a handful now at almost 3. I think that Rafferty is just easier over-all, just a much calmer baby in general. Did anyone else get that with their babies? One a nightmare baby and one a dream baby?
That's always comforting to hear. We're still debating whether or not we want to risk having a third just incase we have a 3rd premmie. We are worried it could be even earlier than our 32+6 weeker. That was hard enough. and I'm also worried that I could have another screamer like Talon was. We've got it so good at the moment with our Rafe-man. Obviously he has bad moments during the day but Talon almost drove me insane!!! :banghead:
Emily is an amazing little in that she almost never screams expect when replacing the ng tube which makes it fun and since she was 2 mths old has slept from 6-7 pm till 6-7 in the morning yes it is possiable to have that dream baby and Emmy is it.
hugs to you i think i speak for many others out there that it takes strengh and such couage to talk as honestly as you all do thank you for being here.:hugs:
Me = 26DH = 27
Emily Jessica born boxing day 06 26 wks 991 grams
Gabrielle
12-09-2007, 17:02
honestly did i kill this thread i must have, might it be some thing i said hehehe:eek:
angel_one
12-09-2007, 18:17
LOL, no were just busy??? (well i am! lol)
i have an update on hayden!!!!!
as of tuesday this week - he weighs .....drum rolll please........ 7.16kg!!!
so since the pead appointment a few weeks ago (23/8/07) he has gained heaps!! he was just under 6kg then so he has put on over 1 kg!!!
oh and tests came back with low iron and uti!! and he was on antibotics for an ear infection by the time i found out about the Uti so i figured that killed 2 birds with one stone!
since then i have been hospitalized, i woke up with horrible chest pain one morning and thought i was dying!! docs all thought it was a pulmenary embilist (sp??) so for 4 days i sat in hospital having blood tests, xrays, and a ct scan and u/s - only to discover i have gallstones!!!! :smiliedance: (NOT) im not sure if any of you know what thats like but when an attack occurs the pain is worse than child birth (oh and a c-sect!) and it lays me up for 3-4 days!!! .... so untill they are gone (usually by removing the gallbladder) i have to be careful what i eat (dairy, protein and the big one FAT!)
and the pain killers the doc has put me on are not usable when feeding! so bubs is off the boob! - sad day but we had a good go at it!
well i must be off got an assignemnt to do (is already late ! - due to 2 attacks over the last 3 weeks!)
Hey Gabrielle :wave:
No you didn't kill the thread. That's my job ;)
Glad to hear your little girl is going well.
peta1410
13-09-2007, 15:25
Gee Angel_one you have been busy. You poor thing, gall stones would really suck (well duh! she says). I have such a bad diet at the moment and I was worried about gall stones. All I seem to be eating at the moment is biscuits, lollies and chocolate. Can one of the causes of gall stones be from a bad diet or have I been grossly misinformed? Glad to hear Hayden is putting on weight. How old is he? Rafe-man is just over 4 months and he weighs over 6kg. He's such a fatty boombah! When he lays on his tummy it's like his head is just too heavy for him and he rolls over onto his back almost straight away, looks so funny! :laughing: Loves his milk. Sucks dry 200ml bottles and then wants more, but if I give him more he just vomits it up so I know he's just being a pig. The dummy usually makes him happy! :D
peta1410
13-09-2007, 15:26
When I re-read that I realised how awful that sounded Angel_one. I am SOOOOO sorry. I am not saying you have a bad diet. LOL :D :D :D
Yeah sure Peta LOL
Angelone, sorry to hear you've been having a hard time lately and well done hayden for putting on weight.
angel_one
14-09-2007, 07:14
When I re-read that I realised how awful that sounded Angel_one. I am SOOOOO sorry. I am not saying you have a bad diet. LOL :D :D :D
lol - i supose if its the truth you dont notice what was said! lol casuei didnt even have a second think - you are right bad diet!! big culprit - colestrol!! (cant spell this morning)
hayden is 10.5 mths and just over 8mths adjusted.
peta1410
15-09-2007, 21:42
Rafferty has ANOTHER cold, the poor little thing. :thumbsdown: Talon has had a cough all week and he has this habit of just coughing on whatever is in front of him! I lost count of the amount of times he coughed in Rafe's face...or the amount of times I told him to cover his mouth! :laughing: So it was pretty much a given that Rafe would eventually start coughing too and it started yesterday. He must have a sore throat because he has this really raspy cry. I think it may be a long night, he's already woken up 3 times and he usually sleeps through without much stirring at all. :fingerscrossed: he doesn't get out of his sleep pattern.
Gabrielle
20-09-2007, 17:07
well i just have about enough of it. i sso angry i could scream DD was at 26 wks and so i expressed milk for her which she could take for 3 wks any way. dont get me wrong i love her as much as any mum loves their kids.
Emmy has a issue with suck feeding, she was on the ventillanter for 3 days than c-pap for 6 wks any way when she got out of Nicu she was suking some on the breast was trying to attech my breasts were bigger than her head at this point any way she doing ok than she started to have problems about it i dont no what happened apart from the nurses started trying to feed her from the bottle.
it was at this point they said we can send her to ipswich now and i thought great not so far to travel.
she was doing ok on the bottle taking around a third to a half a bottle at a time. no breast at all, whoch hurt me a bit thought it was me.
she come home 100 days old which felt great to havein the at home any way for the first month we wrote down every feed what she did by bottle and what was tube feed.
it was going ok than my mum decide to try and get her to bottle feed so for 24 hrs mum feed her by bottle and was not good she finally relized Emmys will to not suck was pretty powerfull she gave up than.
before i broke my leg about 2 and a half months ago she tried again for three days she forced Emmy to try and suck since. than i broke my leg and my mil had to come and stay with us cause i couldn't care for my self let alone my DD.
while my mil was here she could get Emmy to suck, and cause i couldn't sit up proberly i could feed her for more than 3 wks and now i cant get Emmy to suck at all.
iam worn out and so angry cause i have failed her in trying to provide her with a envioment where she can do that in a happy way. feel like a failer:banghead:
angel_one
20-09-2007, 19:16
gabrielle - was she having full suck feeds before she left the hospital?? i know they wouldnt let hayden out till he was doing that, they didnt care what he was sucking from as long as he was sucking!
i know you prob want to stay clear of the place, but maybe a trip back to hospital might be something to think about (or at least a trip to bubs doc, cause she really needs to start learning how to take at the very least a bottle (obviously - preferably you!) i dont know if a lactation consultant would be any help, as the issue isnt just with the breast but she might be able to give you some sort of help,
are you tube feeding her ebm or formula?
as you obviously want to b/f - whether this is for your sake or hers (as i just wanted to feed dd cause i wanted to - hence she quit! lovely child, but with hayden i wanted to feed him cause i felt he needed the good stuff in bm more so than the other 2 did) maybe just feed her ebm via tube after you attempt to give her a suck feed. (this i say only for the fact of giving her the good stuff!)
and as for mil being able to feed her - well mil suck (sorry! lol) anyway, maybe your dd is picking up some of your feelings (over the feeding issues, or just how overwhelmed you may be over the whole preemie situation) and as i have experienced with both feeding and trying to settle my kids, they scence these things, and will react like we do, she may just be a little overwhelmed!
or the last thing might be ..... shes just being plain old lazy! lol those tube feeds are dam easy, she dont need to suck them and the sucking is hard work - more so when breast feeding - this is why once most babies get given a bottle - they dont like to go back to the boob! - unless its my boys where were just happy to have food! (more so from the boob! - typical males!)
well thats my dribble for the evening.....
oh i made a "preemie" cloth nappy today!!! lol dd was complianing about her dollys dirty bum! and asked me to make her a new nappy! lol, it needs a little bit if tweeking, but i reckon i could make it work on a real baby (a bit smaller than her doll! - which is about a 2.5 kg baby size -slightly bigger than hayden was, so i reckon i could get one to fit a 1.5kger!! lol) im mad! complete looney!!
gabrielle - was she having full suck feeds before she left the hospital?? i know they wouldnt let hayden out till he was doing that, they didnt care what he was sucking from as long as he was sucking!
i know you prob want to stay clear of the place, but maybe a trip back to hospital might be something to think about (or at least a trip to bubs doc, cause she really needs to start learning how to take at the very least a bottle (obviously - preferably you!) i dont know if a lactation consultant would be any help, as the issue isnt just with the breast but she might be able to give you some sort of help,
are you tube feeding her ebm or formula?
as you obviously want to b/f - whether this is for your sake or hers (as i just wanted to feed dd cause i wanted to - hence she quit! lovely child, but with hayden i wanted to feed him cause i felt he needed the good stuff in bm more so than the other 2 did) maybe just feed her ebm via tube after you attempt to give her a suck feed. (this i say only for the fact of giving her the good stuff!)
and as for mil being able to feed her - well mil suck (sorry! lol) anyway, maybe your dd is picking up some of your feelings (over the feeding issues, or just how overwhelmed you may be over the whole preemie situation) and as i have experienced with both feeding and trying to settle my kids, they scence these things, and will react like we do, she may just be a little overwhelmed!
or the last thing might be ..... shes just being plain old lazy! lol those tube feeds are dam easy, she dont need to suck them and the sucking is hard work - more so when breast feeding - this is why once most babies get given a bottle - they dont like to go back to the boob! - unless its my boys where were just happy to have food! (more so from the boob! - typical males!)
well thats my dribble for the evening.....
oh i made a "preemie" cloth nappy today!!! lol dd was complianing about her dollys dirty bum! and asked me to make her a new nappy! lol, it needs a little bit if tweeking, but i reckon i could make it work on a real baby (a bit smaller than her doll! - which is about a 2.5 kg baby size -slightly bigger than hayden was, so i reckon i could get one to fit a 1.5kger!! lol) im mad! complete looney!!
I think that's a business opportunity knocking at your door!!
Gabrielle
21-09-2007, 07:23
they showed me how to tube feed her and than when i broke my leg my mum and mil learnt how to put the NG tube down so that Emmy didnt miss out on feeds cause she pulled the tube out.
i think you are right angel one she is picking up on me and my stress as i can at times be highly stressed out.
when i had her she was so tiny, i was so afried of her size and she had all these wires and tape on her small body. i found it so hard to see and feel like how can this be my DD.
angel_one
21-09-2007, 10:36
they showed me how to tube feed her and than when i broke my leg my mum and mil learnt how to put the NG tube down so that Emmy didnt miss out on feeds cause she pulled the tube out.
when i had her she was so tiny, i was so afried of her size and she had all these wires and tape on her small body. i found it so hard to see and feel like how can this be my DD.
hey i give you credit for being able to put the tube in!
hayden had a og tube and after he started on the suck feeds (everey 2nd feed) the tube was in and out , in and out, the nurses told me that i could pull the tube out after each tube feed if i wanted, but i honestly couldnt do it! i couldnt even watch! (and it wasnt making me sick, i just couldnt see them do that to my baby!)
god i even had a hard time holding him down for the pathlogist to take blood a few weeks ago!
(oh did i mention i was studying! Nursing! lol, and i want to specialize in midwifery and neonatal! lol)
i know what you mean about bubs size and the wires, i remeber that feeling, and being asked if i wanted to hold him that first time was the worst, i felt that yes i really wanted to hold, i mean this was the first time id even seen him in person (12 hours after his birth) but then i'd look at him and think if i touch this kid hes gonna break! hes tooo tiny to touch and hold! then i watched the one of the nurses change him - OMG - they arent "very gentle" lol, i was like wow!
you know i dont think i have actually ever spoken about what i thought that day!
peta1410
21-09-2007, 13:49
[quote=angel_one;1927744] i know what you mean about bubs size and the wires, i remeber that feeling, and being asked if i wanted to hold him that first time was the worst, i felt that yes i really wanted to hold, i mean this was the first time id even seen him in person (12 hours after his birth) but then i'd look at him and think if i touch this kid hes gonna break! hes tooo tiny to touch and hold! then i watched the one of the nurses change him - OMG - they arent "very gentle" lol, i was like wow!
[quote]
Yes, I remember that with Talon. He was in NICU only for one day before being moved to SCN but it was in NICU that I got to hold him properly for the first time. It was so scary seeing him attached to all those monitors but I was really lucky that they were able to take off most of them so I could have a kangaroo(?)cuddle. Premmie babies feel so different to full-term babies, they are so soft and furry and so delicate and I almost couldn't feel him at all against my skin. That's my best memory of the day Talon was born. With Rafe it was that I got to hold him for an hour agisnt my skin before they whisked him away.
Gabrielle, I know what you mean about the babies sensing your stress. With both my boys I had trouble breastfeeding so they were both started on bottles in the nursery. Everytime the nurses fed them they would always drink more than when I fed them. It frustrated me so much and I would sometimes just break down in tears thinking that my baby didn't like me. It was silly of me I know but we all know how hard it can be when we aren't the primary care-giver for our babies and coming in in the mornings and getting updates off virtual strangers was sometimes upsetting too because they seemed so casual about it sometimes. And I think that there is the difference. We as their mothers have so much riding on how much our babies drink at every feed that we tend to become so stressed and I think the babies can pick up on that. The nurses (and MIL) can afford to be casual about it so they're probably more relaxed. Just my opinion, but that's what I felt with my experiences.
Now excuse me, I have to go change my 3rd vomit soaked shirt of the day!!! Thankyou Rafferty Mr Vomit-head!!!
Gabrielle
21-09-2007, 21:34
:p i dont put the tube down her throat as some days i cant stay in the same room when mil and my mum do it. makes me pretty upset at times. i do know how to check the liptis paper and pour milk in the syringe.
i express milk and at times have felt am i going to lose it this time. am trying to get it back up now as my suppley keeps dropping unless i express 4-6 times a day. most of the time when i have DD i only manage to express maybe twice. frustrates me no end that i cant do it more often.
peta1410
22-09-2007, 08:00
Darlin, you sound so miserable. We're not superheros, don't feel like you have to do everything. At the risk of being publicly lynched can I just say if the woes of expressing milk are making you depressed, maybe it's time to think about stopping. You have so much going on in your life, you've got a broken leg, Emmy isn't well and that makes you even more stressed. :hair: How old is she now, about 4 months? If you've been expressing for the whole time than she's had a good dose of breastmilk. I know how difficult the decision to stop is, especially when every fibre in your body is telling you it's the best thing for your baby. But I honestly believe that if it's making your life a nightmare than the best thing you can do for Emmy is to be happy and healthy yourself. She will be fine on formula. Millions of babies have been given nothing but formula and thrive. :thumbsup: Me and my siblings were bottle babies, my sister's 5 kids were all bottle babies and we're all perfectly healthy. I understand that Emmy was a 26 weeker and does need the best and breast milk may be the best but she also needs a happy mummy. Guilt is a normal feeling but there's also a huge sence of relief. This is just my opinion, don't take it as gospel. Anyone who totally disagrees feel free to object. :yes: Talk to your partner before you make any decision so you know you have his support.
Gabrielle
22-09-2007, 09:12
Darlin, you sound so miserable. We're not superheros, don't feel like you have to do everything. At the risk of being publicly lynched can I just say if the woes of expressing milk are making you depressed, maybe it's time to think about stopping. You have so much going on in your life, you've got a broken leg, Emmy isn't well and that makes you even more stressed. :hair: How old is she now, about 4 months? If you've been expressing for the whole time than she's had a good dose of breastmilk. I know how difficult the decision to stop is, especially when every fibre in your body is telling you it's the best thing for your baby. But I honestly believe that if it's making your life a nightmare than the best thing you can do for Emmy is to be happy and healthy yourself. She will be fine on formula. Millions of babies have been given nothing but formula and thrive. :thumbsup: Me and my siblings were bottle babies, my sister's 5 kids were all bottle babies and we're all perfectly healthy. I understand that Emmy was a 26 weeker and does need the best and breast milk may be the best but she also needs a happy mummy. Guilt is a normal feeling but there's also a huge sence of relief. This is just my opinion, don't take it as gospel. Anyone who totally disagrees feel free to object. :yes: Talk to your partner before you make any decision so you know you have his support.
thanks peta1410 i am thinking about as at the moment i have a blocked duct and i am in such pain and expressing never gets it all.
Emily is 9 mths born 6 mth corrected i feel pretty ok that i have gotten her this far. i am trying for the 12 mths of breast milk, not that i should worry as she is now huge at 7 kg.
when she was born she had no brown fat and apart from her lungs needing surport she was fully formed just so tiny, all she needed was time to grow.
i think it might end up with me loseing my milk as i have to have surgery in 4 wks to remove the bolt in my ankle so i am trying to build up the suppley so i have enough frozen for when i am in hospital.
i am sarced, feeling a bit like could i have done anything differently etc etc etc.
Hi ladies,
I'm sorry I've been missing in action. I've had a rough time with the kids lately and DH is constantly travelling and I'm exhausted and sick yet again.
How have you all been?
Peta, I hear you re the vomitting. It's revolting and I hate it when they vomit. How is Rafe going?
Gabrielle, I think you have done a fantastic job getting this far with the breastfeeding. Like Peta said, if it's causing you too much stress it is okay to stop and go onto formula. Have you thought about which formula to use? When I made the decision to stop feeding I consulted with B and M's paed and said I wanted a formula that was as close to breastmilk as possible. He put us onto Nestle NAN HA Gold and I've not looked back. They poo (sorry) about 3 times a day just as when they were breastfed. They don't have constipation issues and they are well and thriving.
Good luck with your decision and whatever it is, just remember that a happy mum will mean a happy baby.
I hope this helps.
Gabrielle
24-09-2007, 10:29
thanks ladies i really do appricate the advice i am starting to feel a bit better about things so maybe iam claming down a bit.
the milk production is great so i have no probs and the blocked duct is finely clearing up so i am not in pain as much now.
peta1410 i hear you about :barf:thing as Emmy still dose it after a feed,{not all the time} :devil6: that she is she thinks its funny:banghead:. hehehehe
peta1410
24-09-2007, 14:20
Hi ladies,
I'm sorry I've been missing in action. I've had a rough time with the kids lately and DH is constantly travelling and I'm exhausted and sick yet again.
How have you all been?
Peta, I hear you re the vomitting. It's revolting and I hate it when they vomit. How is Rafe going?
Gabrielle, I think you have done a fantastic job getting this far with the breastfeeding. Like Peta said, if it's causing you too much stress it is okay to stop and go onto formula. Have you thought about which formula to use? When I made the decision to stop feeding I consulted with B and M's paed and said I wanted a formula that was as close to breastmilk as possible. He put us onto Nestle NAN HA Gold and I've not looked back. They poo (sorry) about 3 times a day just as when they were breastfed. They don't have constipation issues and they are well and thriving.
Good luck with your decision and whatever it is, just remember that a happy mum will mean a happy baby.
I hope this helps.
How often is your hubby away? Does he travel for work? Sorry to hear you're sick again. Nothing too serious I hope. Rafe is doing sooooo well. Still getting over his cold but he's hitting all his mile stones when he should and is such a happy baby. Still sleeping through the night. Talon gets me out of bed more than the baby does!!!
It's amazing how 2 weeks extra in the womb can make such a difference to how they develop when they're born, doesn't it. I remember Talon was delayed until he was about 7 months.
But the vomiting is just horrendous. Talon had reflux but not as bad as Rafe. He has improved alot in the last couple of months but he still vomits everyday and sometimes it's still after every feed. We'll go for a walk to the corner store and by the time I get back my shoulder and one pants leg is covered in vomit. EEWWWW!!! And there's little puddles of it on the shop floor too I assume! I usually have to carry cloth nappies with me to use as spew rags because the little face washers we used for Talon just aren't enough!!!
Rafe's 5 months old tomorrow. Such a big boy. We have to put his seat belt for his car seat onto the top holes already!
Gabrielle so glad to hear your're feeling a little better about your milk situation. just remember that if you do decide to stop no one will think bad of you so you shouldn't either. Good luck.
peta1410
25-09-2007, 08:42
Hey girls, just need to vent and I would rather come here to chat because I feel like I know you all now. I am having a bad day. Had a huge fight with my best friend. Too complicated to get right into but let me just say that the gist of it is that she's a super busy chickie, studies full-time, works part-time, no kids, busy, busy girl. I got p***ed off that she didn't make it to Rafe's Christening a couple of weeks ago and it got into how she's let me down so much in the past about not making enough time in her busy life for important things in my life (she was the first to leave Talon's baby shower, she didn't come to rafe's baby shower, she never came to hospital when I had either baby, she was the second person to leave my wedding - behind my eldery godparents) just to name a few!! Anyway we had a big fight, she made valid points about this being who she is and she was insulted that I could make her feel so lousy about it, I screamed at her and cried so much I was shaking. I realised that it's not just her, my life feels so empty at the moment which is so horrible because I absolutely adore my children and I love spending my days with them but I think I may have abit of cabin fever. I feel like I should have some more me time. Hubby has said it's fine if I want to go out for girls weekends every few weeks and he will stay with the kids. I want to go to TAFE next year but I'm stressing about not being there for the kids. I've always been a stay-at-home mummy and I think I'm a little bit afraid of being without them. I can't seem to a stop crying today and I hate the fact that I lost it with my friend and made her feel so low about herself. She's such a wonderful person and I'm feeling really horrible that I made her so upset. I just feel so alone. I have no friends where I live and I don't go out anywhere except for walks with the kids. I know I'll feel fine later but just needed to get this off my chest. Rafe's crying so I better go.
Gabrielle
26-09-2007, 08:41
peta1410 i had a friend from before i was preggies any way i knew that she had a hard past and was ok with it.
while i was pregnet she talk with with me about things i couldnt handle and it made me so upset i could not bring myself to see her for a while.
when i had Emily i messaged her with the details and cause Emmy was a premmie it was so hhard during that first wk.
she called me and she was hestrical i could get a clear word from her i said i have family visiting i will need to talk to you later.
after i got out of RBH i was so upset about it all, any way i went to see her and she said "iam so happy that Shes here " that made me so upset so angery that she was happy about the birth. {iam crying now}
i feel how can any one be happy about having a preemie even if they are healthy it was such a trama for me.
i had to tell her that cause of her "joy" of Emmys birth and her telling me things that i couldnt handle i told her i couldnt be her friend any more and i havent looked back as i am happy about my decsion.
make a chocie that you will be happy about as you need your life not hers and i now your lonely and needing friends i feel the same however i think try to think of the types of friend you want in your life and god will provide.:hugs: to you msg me if ever want to talk.
peta1410
27-09-2007, 10:17
Thanks for that Gab, I feel abit better now. :yes: You're right. You have to think about what type of people you want in your life, especially after you have kids and the more I think about it the more I realise that she has always let me down and I really don't think I've ever expected too much from her but she seems too think that she doesn't need to make anyone else a priority in her life and that she's not going to change. Why do I need that stress in my life? :rolleyes: I think I got so upset because we've been friends since primary school and it feels like I should hang on to the friendship but our lives are so different. She will always be my friend but I think I need to distance myself from her and her crazy life and just not expect so much from her because I know I will just be dissappointed time and time again. I know I need to do more with making myself happy and I've decided that I need to have more "me" time. I spent some time with my sister yesterday and it felt so nice. She has 5 kids and her youngest is 8 months (4 months older than Rafe) so we have the same kind of life at the moment. I don't think TAFE will work out because it's full-time (4 days a week all day) and we can't afford to put the boys in daycare. So I'm looking at other study options but I'm still so unsure about what I want to do. I want to make sure I don't rush into anything. If it doesn't happen next year there's always the year after that. :thumbsup: Thanks for letting me vent girls.
Gabrielle
28-09-2007, 07:05
peta1410 iam glad your feeling better. its good that you have such a great relationship with your sister.
i find that when i make a hard decsion i always feel better after, like god is rewarding me for the right chocie.:D
Gabrielle
30-09-2007, 08:32
well things have been ok here milk is fine and i went to the docs and he said that i had infection in my breast so iam on antibotics to clear it up.
Emmy is doing better still not sucking well :hair: i feel so aallgh. when is it going to happen?
hehehe live has its ups and downs iam on an up while being on a down not sure if i should be happy :D or sad :gloomy: feeling a bit confused and clueless.
peta1410
02-10-2007, 14:26
Yeah, if only everything could be perfect at the same time. :) Rafe sleeps soooo well at night but is an absolute nightmare during the day. He will have day naps but he'll usually only sleep for about 10-15 minutes. He's driving me nutso today. I've started to use the same techniques that I used for Talon when I had problems with him. He has to saty in his cot for an hour, even if he doesn't sleep the while time and I have to go in every few minutes to give him his dummy and calm him down. His eyes are so droopy but he's just refusing to sleep. He slept for about 10 minutes right at the start and about 5 minutes half way!!! :hair: If he gets too hysterical I take him out. He's just starting to be a clingy little man and I can't have that, not when I have another little boy who wants me to do things with him during the day. Talon is so patient, bless him, but it's really not fair on him. So it's going to be a hard week but it must be done. So :fingerscrossed: it works. Gotta go rescue him from his solitary confinement now. Chat soon.
How often is your hubby away? Does he travel for work? Sorry to hear you're sick again. Nothing too serious I hope. Rafe is doing sooooo well. Still getting over his cold but he's hitting all his mile stones when he should and is such a happy baby. Still sleeping through the night. Talon gets me out of bed more than the baby does!!!
It's amazing how 2 weeks extra in the womb can make such a difference to how they develop when they're born, doesn't it. I remember Talon was delayed until he was about 7 months.
But the vomiting is just horrendous. Talon had reflux but not as bad as Rafe. He has improved alot in the last couple of months but he still vomits everyday and sometimes it's still after every feed. We'll go for a walk to the corner store and by the time I get back my shoulder and one pants leg is covered in vomit. EEWWWW!!! And there's little puddles of it on the shop floor too I assume! I usually have to carry cloth nappies with me to use as spew rags because the little face washers we used for Talon just aren't enough!!!
Rafe's 5 months old tomorrow. Such a big boy. We have to put his seat belt for his car seat onto the top holes already!
Gabrielle so glad to hear your're feeling a little better about your milk situation. just remember that if you do decide to stop no one will think bad of you so you shouldn't either. Good luck.
Hi Peta,
My DH probably travels every 2-3 weeks. He at the moment is in Sydney since Sunday night.
How are things with you? I was reading in an earlier post that you were having a rough time with your friend. Has that settled at all?
angel_one
10-10-2007, 15:45
quick update (as hes crying ) on hayden - hes got almost 2 teeth now!! and has one occasion been caught standing alone!!!!!!
and he is now haivng his day naps in his room with his big brother!!! yay!!!!
peta1410
11-10-2007, 14:55
Hi Peta,
My DH probably travels every 2-3 weeks. He at the moment is in Sydney since Sunday night.
How are things with you? I was reading in an earlier post that you were having a rough time with your friend. Has that settled at all?
I get stressed when hubby goes away for 1 night!! :eek:
I'm basically not talking to my friend at the mo. Not ready to pretend I'm still not totally p***ed off at her still. I'll just give it some time and see what happens.
Rafe is well. We started him on solids this week and he's loving it. I've noticed he sleeps so much better during the day now. :smiliedance:
Peta, I hate it when hubby goes away but sometimes it's peaceful.
Yay for Rafe and his solids. Matthew still wakes at night for a bottle, but I think it's him catching up from when he was so sick.
How was your weekend? What did you get up to?
We had a busy weekend, Jake had swimming sat morning then haircut in the afternoon and my parents for dinner. Then sunday we shopped all day with the kids,
peta1410
25-10-2007, 12:48
We had an eventful night last night. Rafe was unsettled around bedtime and wouldn't drink his bottle properly, kept squirming around. So we tried to put him to bed and he just wasn't having it, so we'd take him out again. He's usually pretty good with bedtime, he'll whinge abit but eventually nod off and sleep till about 6am. From about 7.15pm he just started screaming. I was putting Talon to bed and hubby was looking after Rafe and trying to calm him down. He would nod off for about 10 mins and then wake screaming again. I spent most of House standing and rocking him. By 9.30 he was absolutely hysterical and was screaming soooooooo loud, gutteral piercing screams. I was in tears because I didn't know what was wrong with him but I could tell he was in pain and I thought it was his belly. But this was so out of character for him and we really didn't know what to do so I rang 13HEALTH and they suggested taking him to the hospital. We waited a few more minutes and he was just getting worse so I rang an ambulance. By the time I had organised myself and his baby bag the ambos still hadn't arrived so i gave hubby a break (much needed ciggie) and layed with Rafe on our bed and he just started to calm down and his eyes started to droop and he fell asleep! I was worried at first because he had been so hysterical and just suddenly stopped and the 13HEALTH lady said if he bacame droopy or had trouble breathing call 000 immediately. I watched him and his arm movements were still jerky and his breathing was fine so I rang and cancelled the ambos. God, they must have thought I was an over-reacting mother but for my husband to insist I call 000 (a big call for him, hates hospitals) I know I wasn't over-reacting and I don't really care if they did think that. You can't take chances with babies. And I know my son and know how out of character that was for him so I had every reason to worry. They were really nice about it though and said to call back if he got bad again. I didn't want him out of my sight so we set up the port-a-cot in our bedroom and he stayed with us. I didn't sleep any better though, kept waking up and thinking he was too quiet so I'd get up and make sure he was still ok. He slept through till about 6am and woke up chatting away and kicking the side of his cot. And today he's happy as, lies on the rug and sings away!!! He's slept alot today though, still exhausted from last night's scream-a-thon! But hopefully all's well now. Mum's taken Talon tonight just incase, but I think if he was still not right he would be screaming today, so :fingerscrossed: he's fine.
Gabrielle
27-10-2007, 15:06
hi peta is rafe ok now is he doing all right and hows talon hope you all are doing good.
my lil girl is teething and i am so happy :smiliedance: she is coping with it really well asome drooling and grissling about it though.
Peta, I'm sorry to hear that you're having a rough time with Raph. How is he today,
Gabrielle, yay on the teething. B and M are teething and I think we feel every tooth. They seem to get a cold while teething...
I have a question, is it common for premmies to be fussy feeders?
Gabrielle
28-10-2007, 17:41
Shajake i have been told they are and my lil girl dosnt suck feed at all can do drinking and eating dosnt want things in her mouth at the moment though.
Gabrielle, thanks for that. So what do you do, how does she feed?
peta1410
01-11-2007, 14:27
Hi all, Rafe doing fine now. Talon is great, turns 3 this month!!! We're having a Buzz Lightyear themed party. I think I am more excited than he is! Yay on teething Gab, hope it's going well. I have heard the poor feeding with prems too. Talon was an absolutely hopeless feeder right from the start. Poor sucking and just a disinterest in the whole feeding process really. He started off on solids well but soon lost interest and he is still a HUGE fussy eater. It's probably really frowned upon but we have to bribe him every night to eat his dinner, some times it works, some times it doesn't. We never force him to eat, whatever he eats is great YAY but if he doesn't then we don't make a big deal about it. He only weighs 14kg. Rafe on the other hand is such a piglet. He devours his bottles and is now on 2 solid feeds a day!!! And he's only 6 months old. If I gave him 250ml bottles he would drink it just because it's there and would then vomit it up, so I just give him 200 mls and the solid feeds and that seems to be keeping him happy. I think he will be on 3 meals by the end of next week. He was weighed on Tuesday when he got his needles and he now weighs 7kg. He cried when he got his needles but the dr pulled a funny face at him and he started giggling. It was so cute. :D
Gabrielle
07-11-2007, 10:08
hi peta so cute about Rafe, Emmy is the same pull a face and she laughs.
i dont think bribing kids is good yet if its the only way to get Talon to eat do what works.
Emmy is almost 8 kg so big and yet even if she is a premmie she is with in normal limits for both her ages. hehehehe i'm so happy about that.
i finally have decided to put Emmy on formula as i have some BIG issues with my right breast, have been to doctor and i'm having it checked out thursday heres hoping its all ok.:fingerscrossed:
angel_one
07-11-2007, 14:55
ok ladies its been a while since i was in here!! so i beleive its time for a update!!!!
firstly: we had our last pead appointment on the 25th - she was very pleased with his progress (weight wise) and shocked at his developement rate! lol, and thus we have been relased from the pead clinic :smiliedance: , however his urine tests were a little funny, and she is a little concerned , and has us on the allert, if he gets a high fever he is to see the doc immeadiatly, as she is concerneed about his renal system and has said if he was to have probs there, the first signs in an infant would be high fever and not feeling well. other than that all is good.
secondly: hayden turned 1 last saturday!!
so we now have a big little boy! (who is 8+kg now - cant remeber the exact but its over 8!)
so we have gone from this:
http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y122/angel_one/Haydenbirthannouncement.jpg
to this:
http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y122/angel_one/haydenbirthdayparty4-11-07021.jpg
and today:
http://i4.photobucket.com/albums/y122/angel_one/07-11-07001.jpg
(yes that is a cut on his forehead! - and you should ahve seen the lump!!!!its a shocker!!)
any how i should go and do some snuggling, before they kill each other!
Gabrielle
08-11-2007, 14:55
angel one thats great about your boy being so big. hope that he stays healthy and strong. hayden looks great, even with the cut on his forehaed. and i hope he stays healthy as well.
well i am so relived about my test they all clear and iam so happy.
peta1410
09-11-2007, 12:06
happybirthday Hayden. YAY!!! I might be wrong but I reckon that owie on Haydens' head looks remarkably like a tooth mark!!!! :detective: HAHAHAHA!!! What a sweetheart he is! Gab, hope the bottle is going well for you. I am with you about the "treats". I hate that we have to do it but it's sometimes the only thing that works and even our dr said if it works do it. He has his 3 year check up in a couple of months so I can discuss his eating habbits with the CHN then. He's such a fussy boy but he goes through stages. Some nights he'll eat everything with no persuasion from us at all and other nights it a mission just to get him to eat a few mouthfuls of anything. But like I've said, he's always been fussy, and hubby says enjoy the little meals now because once he becomes a teenager he'll be devouring everything in sight!!! :eek:
peta1410
19-11-2007, 14:55
Talon turned 3 today!!! :smiliedance: Where have the years gone? We had a big Buzz Lightyear party for him yesterday and he had soooo much fun. His eyes were practically falling out of his head by the afternoon, he was so exhausted. I am so proud of my little man, just wanted to share!! :D (P.S. We now have enough Buzz Lightyear stuff for 5 children!!!!) :laughing:
angelone, great news about Hayden. happybirthday Hayden
Gabrielle, great news about your test results.
Peta, happybirthday Talon.
Ben and Matthew are officially commando crawling. Matthew's been doing it for a little while, but man you should see them now.
They will be 11 months on Wednesday. I can't believe that after everything we've been through that here they are 11 months down the track and thriving.
Hope you are all well and I look forward to chatting soon.
peta1410
20-11-2007, 08:54
YAY BEN AND MATTHEW!!!! :yelclap: Big boys now! Now you have to watch them like a hawk. Rafe's not crawling yet but he's rolling around. He's always rolling off the safe confines of his mat and I swear he's trying to follow me. Talon rolled all around the house before he learnt to crawl, he actually would roll around after me!!! :laughing::laughing::laughing: Now I have to constantly check the floor for small chokables!! He puts EVERYTHING into his mouth. I found him the other day wedged up against the side of the lounge sucking on Talon's shoe! :eek: You could tell he wasn't enjoying it but that didn't seem to be deterring him!!! YUCK! Oh the joys of parenting. :D
biankNjord
02-12-2007, 17:36
My water broke at 24 weeks i got the steriod injection i was bed rested and had to stay in hospital until he was born.. they gave me roughly 4 weeks.. which was so luckily as i had him 3days later.. 4 hours after my 18th birthday..
My son jordan weighed 719grams 22 cm HC, 33 cms long his eyes were still fused shut until day 5 i think it was. My ds had low blood pressure, also bleeding in the left side of his brain.. graded between 3 & 4 which is pretty much the worst..
His bleeding has gone & it still remains at 4.
Some of his brain cells have died but his all good. I believe he is all good and wont have any short or long term affects from it.
It them a while to get him to breathe and was placed on the ventilator straight away..
then he upgraded to the Bipap (giving him some help- so many breathes per minute) he kept having desats and braddys so then had to put him back on the ventilator. didnt take him long to be put back on bipap as he still kept desating- he still does now but not as many & its unknown why..
60 days later he is still in Bay 1- (the most intensive bay) weighing 1555grams so he has doubled in size and is on Sipap.. he started to have time off 2hours off the machine 10 hours on but became too tired.. he still isnt having time off but *fingers crossed* he will start again. His still being tube fed- And is back on EBM up to 9mls 2nd hourly (he was on full feeds- 14mls hourly but due to being too tired and desating they took him off) a minor set back but his going forward again..
I do not think it comes between bonding with him being in intensive care as from day 2 i get to cuddle him and hold his little hand- well he holds my finger.. as soon as i go in there and say hello to my little baby he opens his eyes and looks at me, when he cries i put my hands on him and he settles down. I go up to the hospital 3 times a day every 6 hours to do his cares which consists of cleaning his eyes, mouth and changing his nappy..
His still in the crib with 27.5 dergee of air so as soon as his stable breathing by himself he can go straight into an open crib then i can cuddle him as often as i want..
Then he'll move into bay one and soon after that he will be at home with me hopefully.
I admit it is very hard having a baby and not being able to take him home straight away and not being allowed to hold ur ds or dd as often as you want.. there are really bad days but also good days its a rollarcoaster and they tell u that from the day it is known u are having a premmie baby. They do prepare u for the worst as u would rather then for the to keep u hopes up and if something goes wrong you are prepared for it.. in my opinion all you need to do is think positive and believe its going to be alright and it will. When your or ur bub is having a bad day u have to think that is ok ur baby is allowed that- as they arent supposed to be here yet and they need there rest from breathing, eating, being handled or anything.. to all you other mums out there with a premmie baby still in hospital or with a premmie baby your a hero because it is hard and i also think that every premmie baby is that little bit more special especially the earlier gestation babies because the things they go through its something so unbelieveable and the first few weeks even months is a struggle to survive. My beautiful bundle of joy keeps me strong he is such a little fighter. I love him more then anything in the world & am so grateful to have him in my life as i could of lost him.. his a little miracle.. :)
x0x
peta1410
04-12-2007, 14:32
Hi biankNjord and welcome :wave:. Congratualations on your miracle boy. Come back anytime to chat about anything, whatever is on your mind. Good luck with everything.
Gabrielle
10-12-2007, 09:56
biankNjord you are amazing. reminds me of all the good and the bad i have had with my DD. thinking postive is the only way that i stayed sane.
peta1410 that is so great about Talons birthday. hope he remembers it and did you get heaps of photos hehehe.
shajbm Emmy is doing a lot better on the feeding when she dosnt have a sore throat. she is tube feed when she wont take the sippy cup.
i have been unwell for the last mth and have been trying to do what i can to cope. the internet come in very last of the things i need to do.
Emmy is doing good she has 2 teeth which is great. she can crawl backwards at speed and gose forward once a day hehehe. we have baby proffed our living area and tv cabint. so no more fear of her getting into things that are dangous hehehe.
my DH and i want to increase our family size soon, my mum on the other hand gets freaked when i suggest i might be pregenet cause these last 3 mth we have hints that i might be always comes back negative though.
hope you all are doing good and your lives going where you want them to. have fun hehehe.
:wave:everyone.
biankNjord, welcome. The girls in here are great.
Gabrielle, Sorry to hear that you have been so unwell. It's really hard when us mums are sick and still need to look after little ones.
Just a quick post tonight as I'm totally stuffed, we flew in from Brisbane tonight. I was going to make some cards but I can't be stuffed.
I have had their hearing tested and
Ben is fine but they want to see Matthew again. He didn't pick up 1 of the sounds. She didn't seem to worry, but I do. I just hope there's nothing wrong. Should I be worried?
I'll check back in tomorrow. Matthew and Ben have their 12 month(actual) 10 month (corrected) check up. I wonder how they will go?
peta1410
12-12-2007, 14:13
Shajbm how did the boys go? Hope all went well. How did Matthews hearing test go? Don't get too worried.
Gabrielle hope you are feeling better.
We're all pretty good. Talon had his first nose-picking related nose bleed a few nights ago!!! Geeze, he must've been trying to scratch his brain!!!!! Unbelievable how much they bleed. Rafe is nearly crawling. He comando crawls with his arms now. Sometimes he gets up on his knees and rocks then he puts his head on the ground and pushes himself backwards. He ended up with carpet burn on his forhead the other day! :D We're off to the dr this arvo. Poor little thing, he has an haemangioma (raised stawberry birthmark) on both the top of his head and on his bum. The one on his head is fine but the one on his bum is in such an awkward spot that it actually rubbed on his nappy and became infected. He has to wear a gauze patch on it permanently so it doesn't rub on his nappy. It's so painful for him and it hurts him when I have to change the dressing. We're going back to get the results of the swab they took. I'm hoping they will laser it off so it's better for him in the long-run. I can't imagine having to go through this for the next couple of years, it can sometimes take up to 8 years for them to dissappear! I'm in tears changing his dressing because he sobs and it breaks my heart. And can you believe, the first dr I took him to told me it wasn't infected and that i just had to dress it better. Then he sat me down and literally read to me from a medical text book!!! I finally got an appointment with my own dr and he was utterly disgusted at how we were treated and couldn't believe that the other dr hadn't even taken a swab! B!!!tard. Feel like reporting him if there's something serious in the results! Wish us luck.
peta1410
13-12-2007, 15:22
Turns out Rafe has a Staph infection!!! The antibiotic cream he has seems to be working but if it doesn't completely clear up he'll have to go on pennicillin. Then if it keeps getting infected we'll go over other options. At least it's clearing up now and seems alot less painful. :thumbsup:
Shajbm how did the boys go? Hope all went well. How did Matthews hearing test go? Don't get too worried.
Gabrielle hope you are feeling better.
We're all pretty good. Talon had his first nose-picking related nose bleed a few nights ago!!! Geeze, he must've been trying to scratch his brain!!!!! Unbelievable how much they bleed. Rafe is nearly crawling. He comando crawls with his arms now. Sometimes he gets up on his knees and rocks then he puts his head on the ground and pushes himself backwards. He ended up with carpet burn on his forhead the other day! :D We're off to the dr this arvo. Poor little thing, he has an haemangioma (raised stawberry birthmark) on both the top of his head and on his bum. The one on his head is fine but the one on his bum is in such an awkward spot that it actually rubbed on his nappy and became infected. He has to wear a gauze patch on it permanently so it doesn't rub on his nappy. It's so painful for him and it hurts him when I have to change the dressing. We're going back to get the results of the swab they took. I'm hoping they will laser it off so it's better for him in the long-run. I can't imagine having to go through this for the next couple of years, it can sometimes take up to 8 years for them to dissappear! I'm in tears changing his dressing because he sobs and it breaks my heart. And can you believe, the first dr I took him to told me it wasn't infected and that i just had to dress it better. Then he sat me down and literally read to me from a medical text book!!! I finally got an appointment with my own dr and he was utterly disgusted at how we were treated and couldn't believe that the other dr hadn't even taken a swab! B!!!tard. Feel like reporting him if there's something serious in the results! Wish us luck.
Turns out Rafe has a Staph infection!!! The antibiotic cream he has seems to be working but if it doesn't completely clear up he'll have to go on pennicillin. Then if it keeps getting infected we'll go over other options. At least it's clearing up now and seems alot less painful. :thumbsup:
Dumb dr. I can't believe he treated you that way. Glad that your normal dr treated you better.
The boys 12 month actual and 10 month corrected visit went okay. Ben put on a whopping 1.5kg but little Matthew only put on 270grams and that was in just under 2 months. Not sure why but we're off to see the paed on Wednesday. His growth pattern has changed and he's not putting on the right amount of weight.
Why do these things have to keep happening?
chicken little
03-01-2008, 09:47
Hi there.
I have two children, my daughter was born at 30 weeks and my son at 32 weeks.
I know what you guys are going through, however I am lucky that they turned out perfectly healthy.
My kids are now 3 1/2 and 2 but I still have flashbacks of the days in the NeoNatal ward. I find it hard to read newspaper stories or watch movies with sick kids in it, it just makes me so sad because I know I'm one of the lucky ones. But it could be my overactive hormones playing up too! :)
My daughter was in hospital for 5 1/2 weeks and my son for 4 weeks but are now huge and you wouldn't even know they were premmie. They are 19kg and 16kg... No one believes me they were early - until they see the photos. My daughter was 3 pound 11 when she was born and my son 5 pound 1. I don't think anyone can understand how hard it is to not be able to hold your babies or even touch them, unless they've been there themselves. After my daughter was born, my family kept asking for photos of me holding her etc and my mum had to try and explain that I couldn't touch her. They just didn't understand. I think the hardest part for me was watching these tiny little babies with tubes everywhere and needles etc and not being able to protect them. They still have tiny little scars on their hands from the drips etc. The hardest part is, no one knows why both kids came early. I just hope if I have more in the future, the same thing won't happen. I don't know if I could go through it all again.
Best of luck to you all though. I hope Kenzee is doing well.
Allison :)
peta1410
05-01-2008, 15:12
Welcome chicken little, I understand exactly what you said. The heartbreak of not being able to hold your little bubbas but also feeling grateful that it wasn't as bad as it could've been. I also have no idea why my 2 came early but I did test positive to strep b infection with both of mine so I'm hoping if I do have another baby they can test me earlier for it and treat me and hopefully that may take me full-term? The thought of going through it all again for a 3rd time terrifies me and people say to me that maybe I shouldn't risk it because what if it came even earlier...but I hear these fantastic ladies who have had severe prems and they are an inspiration and they inspire me to take a risk. :thumbsup:
P.S. I hope you all had a wonderful xmas and new year. Mine was fantastic! :D
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